Here, between the two of us, there’s no harm in the truth. Colette is in too deep, she’d never tell the whole truth to her colleagues, and besides, she has real criminals to catch.
“I wanted her, and I knew we would be good for each other. I wanted her to have a chance to see that, and for me, to prove it to her.”
“By isolating her from everything familiar, and showering her in luxury. Frankly, I’m not sure if I should envy or pity her. She didn’t stand a chance.”
Sometimes I forget that while mostly friendly, Colette maintains some sort of a love/hate relationship with me. She likes to stoke the fire.
“I don’t think you understand,” I say, getting up to leave. I think this conversation has gone on long enough. “That’s okay. I don’t expect you, or anyone to be able to. Nice talking to you, Colette. Dinner will be served in a few, and if you need anything, just call Marlene, okay?”
She laughs. “You know you can be one arrogant bitch, right, never thinking you could be wrong just this one time? I’m glad you’re with the good guys, mostly.”
“You’re good at backhanded compliments, but I’m used to it by now. Mostly. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
On the way to the dining room, my cell phone rings, and it’s Jimmy, demanding to know why security guards are at Mom’s house, and his own manager has arranged for increased protection as well.
“What the hell did you do?”
“Why is that the first thing you think, that I did something wrong? I’m offended.” …one arrogant bitch.
“Anyway, Susan and I will come by tonight, to talk. If we all need protection all of a sudden, someone should at least tell us why. I know you like keeping secrets—I really don’t, Carter.”
“Sure, okay, let’s talk. I’ll make reservations send you a text with the time and place.”
He snorts and hangs up.
I guess I’ll have to find Penelope and tell her I won’t be home for dinner. I prefer to take this conversation to a restaurant—it will be much more civil that way.
Chapter Ten
Penny
My mind is still reeling from the past few weeks—could be that it hasn’t stopped since the day I met Carter? There are so many things I’d like to talk more about, but there never seems to be time. I understand why she’s making most of those decisions by herself, that doesn’t mean I have to like it.
Muriel hangs out at the office where she doesn’t have to worry about being obvious. Traci, of course, is generally aware of Carter’s standing in the world and that she requires protective measures for herself and the people in her life. Even the work we do here isn’t always without complications—there are people who don’t like to see women of the world advance.
It’s a bit trickier at the university. Like Carter said, Muriel has enrolled in the same classes I take. She made a deal with the dean behind closed doors, as easy as that. No one questions Muriel’s presence, but of course I’m aware of why she is here. The thought distracts me.
Does Carter really think someone will come after me?
Yeah, why wouldn’t she? Laydon has already proven how far he will go on a principle. I’m scared, for her, for both of us, and Muriel is a constant reminder. She, however, is playing it cool, making it look like she’s actually interested in sociology. She came up with a good back story to invite herself to my study group, and when I head to the cafeteria for a quick snack between classes, she’s there as well. Muriel doesn’t talk much, so I do the talking.
“You really think someone would try something here in the cafeteria? Those aren’t random criminals. From what I understand, they’re organized and try to stay under the radar.”
She gives me a wry smile. “Believe me, they’d come barging in here guns blazing if the boss told them so. On the lower level, folks are expendable.”
Not a reassuring thought. Even though it unnerves me to be under constant observation, I don’t have much to argue against it.
“So how did you meet Carter?”
“How does anyone meet Carter?” She throws the question back at me. “I suppose it’s a similar story every time. She likes to use her money to take out bad guys. Lucky for us. Relax. I didn’t sleep with her.”
I’m mortified she could read all those questions in my face. For a long time, neither of us says anything.
“I ran away from home at fifteen,” she says. “There are people who can smell that you’re vulnerable, that you just want to believe everything they tell you. When you figure it out, it’s too late.”
I have to think of the fake FBI agent who showed me pictures with Laydon and Carter. I’m not sure I ever believed him, but he had a badge and a gun, and he wasn’t going to take no for an answer. It seems like that’s nothing in comparison to what Muriel has been through.
“Enough revelations. We have to get back to class.”
She looks around the room, waits for me to get up and follows me out. All right. It looks like I will have to get used to having her around for a while. It could always be worse.
I wonder if Carter will have some time for a quiet evening tonight. She’s been working hard since we came back, and is understandably occupied with Colette and all the recent developments. In class, I daydream about how I’m going to distract her later. It has to be tonight, since tomorrow will be a long day with work, more classes and an intense study session for the test on Friday.
Muriel drops me off at home where Marlene informs me that Carter won’t be home for dinner. She doesn’t offer much of an explanation.
“Ms. Forbes wanted me to tell you that in case she doesn’t see you tonight, you should be home by five tomorrow so you can get ready for the gala.”
I was almost drifting, trying to rein in my disappointment when I realize what she just said. “Gala?”
“The Women Executives Alliance? Ms. Forbes will be receiving an award.”
“Oh. That’s…great. Is it something I’ll need to attend? I have a test on Friday.”
Marlene’s expression is pensive, which tells me all I need to know. If attending was an option, Carter wouldn’t have made sure Marlene passes on her exact words. I’ll have to talk to her about it. I missed some time during the European trip, which was okay, but I need to pass this test. She’ll understand? Then again, I could use tonight to study, since it doesn’t look like we’ll be spending much of the day together anyway. Hopefully we have a moment to talk tomorrow.
Something else springs to mind. “Do you know if Ms. Grady had dinner yet? Maybe we could eat together.”
Marlene’s first reaction is doubtful, but she catches herself. “I was about to serve her. I can check if she’s up for a visitor.”
“Yes, please do that. Thank you.”
It’s a bit of a surprise to me that Colette agrees to have dinner with me. I’m both anxious and curious to see her again—too many things needed to remain unspoken the last time. This is not about me though, not anymore. It won’t harm to get to know the people in Carter’s circle better.
Carter hasn’t talked much about her condition, so I’m taken aback for a moment, feeling guilty that I didn’t seek her out sooner. It’s not like we’re friends or even close acquaintances, but I can’t deny she did help me and Carter keep up the cover story. We owe her.
“Thank you,” I say. “Carter is busy tonight.”
“No problem. I appreciate the company.”
I can see the curiosity, and I can’t help wondering how much Carter has told her about the real life we have together.
“How are you doing?” I ask.
She shrugs. “Okay, I guess, considering. The nightmares are pretty awful, and I’m not sure what’s going to happen to my career from here, but that has been iffy for a while anyway. I’ll live.”
“I’m glad.” I can understand why Carter feels somewhat guilty about the incident—I do too. Colette Grady has been drawn into those secret operation, one of which I was the subject of, early on. “You know we’ll do
anything we can to help.”
“Sure. I appreciate that.”
I notice that her hand is trembling slightly when she picks up the glass of water.
“Congratulations on your wedding,” she says. “You are happy?”
“I am.”
“Ironic, isn’t it, that we meet here again. I guess me trying to save you from Carter didn’t work well.”
“You didn’t need to save me.”
She leans back in her chair, her expression thoughtful. “Maybe not. Either way, it makes me wonder about the crossroads we take. All those years ago, I could have just said no when she offered me her high-priced lawyer. My career would have been over there and then, and maybe I wouldn’t have ended up like this. I don’t know. She’s not the worst person to have on your side.”
“What happened?” I admit it, I’m curious. There’s no denying that Carter goes out of her way to use her money and influence, in general, and for a small handpicked group of people. Most of them are women. I am consoled by what Muriel told me earlier—not all of them were lovers. I shouldn’t even have a single moment of petty jealousy. She married me.
Colette studies me for a moment, probably assessing how much she can tell me.
“I can keep a secret—obviously.” It’s not even a joke.
“We caught this rapist, a long time ago, and then we had to let him go on a technicality. He went back home to his wife who still swore he was innocent even with all the evidence against him. Then he went missing, ended up dead—and here comes the tricky part. We had to find who did it, which we did.”
I listen to her story with mixed feelings, a morbid fascination about the glimpse into a world I knew nothing about in my pre-Carter life, and then a sudden and harsh dread.
“I did find her, and…I let her go. I know I shouldn’t have, but was a decision of a split-second, and all those reports were still vividly on my mind. I acted on my emotions, not like a cop. The Powers That Be were just waiting for an opportunity like that, but then Carter stepped in.”
There’s a question on my mind, the idea terrifying me, so much I can’t even open my mouth to ask. Fortunately, Colette reads me just fine.
“She didn’t have any personal connection, to him or the victims. It’s just something she does—and I knew I was going to owe her for it.” She looks straight at me. “There were times when I wasn’t sure if it was the right thing to keep silent about you, and accept the week in the guest house.”
I’m still so relieved my worst fears haven’t come true that it takes me a while to answer. “I understand you’re conflicted about all this, but this is all I can tell you. I love her.”
“She had you drugged and brought to another country.”
“She made sure you didn’t get killed, and is getting you the best medical care you could imagine.”
“Yeah. I guess that’s a contradiction in terms we’ll have to live with.”
“It’s not a contradiction to me. Her approach might be unorthodox, but Carter uses her influence for good. We both wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for her, and I think that’s what counts.”
I stay for coffee and dessert. The atmosphere is slightly awkward. I didn’t know she harbored such mixed feelings for Carter, but I guess it’s only normal to do some soul-searching after a trauma like this.
“Focus your energy on healing,” I tell her before I go. “I am fine in every way. I have a bodyguard who makes sure no one’s coming after me. I was just lucky about everything else, and I wouldn’t give it up for anything.”
“Thanks for the conversation, Penny,” she says. I’m not sure if there was a hint of sarcasm to her tone. “Come by again sometime?”
“I will.”
Right after that exam and, oh, discussing the upcoming event with Carter. We’ll see how that goes.
She’s still not home when I roam the house restlessly even though I should be working, then do a few laps in the indoor pool, take a shower and go to bed. At least, when she joins me, she’ll find a surprise.
* * * *
The soft noises of someone in the room, trying not to make a sound, wake me. There’s a small line of light coming from the master bathroom, then she turns it off, coming to bed. I can feel the air of frustration and weariness, and I turn to her, leaning into her, running my hands over the fabric of her negligee.
“Welcome home,” I say, kissing her neck. “That was a long day.”
She sighs. “No kidding. Jimmy called and demanded a meeting…okay. It’s not that important. You’re naked.”
“I thought you might like that.” I slip my hand underneath the hem of the satin sleepwear, thrilled with playing the active part for once, having her warm and pliant in my arms, opening to my touch. I know we’re both tired, but maybe I can interest her…oh yes, definitely.
“God, yes.”
In the dark, I keep up the gentle rhythm, listen to her breathing change, her moans inciting me. I love it when she ties me down and has her way with me, but this, I love it too. I’m ridiculously happy about the state of our lives, even with all the challenges. I never thought I’d meet someone like her, someone I’d become addicted, let alone married to. All this money is just the icing on the cake. It makes our lives easier and complicated in other ways, but I’d love her if she had nothing. I caress her until she pushes her hips into my hand, shaking with the intensity of her orgasm.
“Thank you,” she whispers, her raspy breathless tone having an effect I can feel at my core, hot and undeniable. “I needed that.”
“I imagined. Jimmy is mad…about the bodyguard situation?”
“He’s not happy, but it’s nothing we can change at the moment. He’ll get over it. How was your day?”
“All right. I had dinner with Colette. She seems to be doing better.” Physically, that is. I’m sure Carter is aware of the challenges. “Do you have time for breakfast tomorrow? Marlene told me about the award. Congratulations.”
“Yeah, thanks. I’ll make the time. You’ll be there, right?”
“Hm…”
About that.
I know I should tell her right now, but rational thought flees rapidly when she’s on top of me, kissing me hard, my legs parting in instinctive reaction, warm wetness mingling. I won’t take long, pleasuring her earlier got me all worked up. When she moves away, I make a sound in protest. Carter puts a finger to my lips. “Shh. Give me a second.”
She reaches over to open the drawer, the implications of the simple gesture sending me into a tailspin of lust once more. Restraints, toys, all of the above, or none, I’ve learned it doesn’t really matter. What matters is the person who ties the knot—or flips the switch. She’s back to caress, tease, kisses her way down to my stomach. What did I ever do before she came into my life? I can’t remember. I am grateful, because I have everything.
I am also grateful for the solid, soundproof walls of this property, because I can’t hold in the gasps and moans, coming undone at the feel of her tongue caressing my sex. I’m a heartbeat away from succumbing to the irresistible sensation when she shifts, gently opening me up to the smooth object gliding into me. The vibrations start, slowly at first, then pick up with another setting. Something blue, the toy that came into play on our wedding night. I can’t hold out any longer, my body tensing sharply and then the release washes through me, powerfully, deeply. She holds me to her as I quiver, her finger on my clit adding just the right amount of stimulation.
It seems like I can’t come up with a surprise for her without getting one in return, but that’s fine. This is what I chose, and I’ve never been more satisfied in my life.
* * * *
I hurry up the next morning, shower and dress because I want to make sure we can squeeze in as much time for breakfast as possible. I want to make sure Carter understands—it’s not that I don’t want to be with her on the occasion, but in the long run, passing my exams and getting my degree will serve both of us even more. It is the only way I can make som
e sort of contribution eventually, being a respected professional in her business, not someone who was lucky to have married the boss.
I know I am lucky, and I’ll never forget it. Even on a normal work day, the breakfast buffet is something like from a luxury hotel. There’s a lot of money going to local food banks as well. I find the thought reassuring, making me feel less guilty.
I’m not feeling guilty this morning, on the contrary, energized and ready to face the day after last night.
“You worked up an appetite. I wonder when that happened,” Carter says teasingly as she sits across from me, reaching for a toast from the bread basket.
“You had something to do with it, remember?”
“Yeah. I wish I could have done a little more, but it is going to be another long day after all. Jimmy and Susan are still in town as well, I thought we could have lunch after your classes?”
“I don’t know. Traci expects me at 1:00 pm sharp. There’s a meeting.”
“Well, she’ll understand if I call her, and I’ll make sure she lets you off early enough so you can be here when Denise arrives. Ironic, isn’t it, you go to an event for women in business, and you still need to make an appointment with the stylist.”
This is not going as planned.
“I’m not sure what she’ll think if I miss the meeting and then go home sooner. I don’t want her to think I…”
I’m only there because of you? Which would be the honest truth.
“They all know we’re married, and that you made room for me in your company. For which I’m grateful, but I’m trying to prove to everyone that I deserve to be there.”
“Everyone knows that. If they have a problem, they can take it up to me, or leave. Traci and everyone else know how I run my business. You’ll be fine.”
Now, for the harder part.
“I have an exam tomorrow morning. I studied for it, but…I could really use this evening. I’m sorry.”
“I understand this is important to you, but I need you there and prove to the world I don’t keep you locked up and chained in my basement. They nearly pulled the award over the FBI investigation. It’s not like we need the money, I was going to donate that anyway, but it could mean some bad press if you’re not there.”
Surrender To Me (Surrender Trilogy Book 2) Page 8