by Katie Ginger
‘God rest ye merry gentleman, let nothing ye dismay,’ he sang in a great baritone voice.
Nell laughed. ‘I’m more of a ‘I Wish it Could be Christmas Everyday’ kind of girl.’ She did a little dance on the spot as she sang it.
‘I can’t wait for tonight,’ he said, taking off his coat and gloves. Suddenly he sucked in a breath like he’d hurt himself.
‘What?’ Nell asked, checking him over. Her eyes came to rest on his left hand. His index finger was wrapped tightly in a bandage. He must have caught it when he took his coat off. ‘What happened to your hand?’
‘I just nipped myself, it’s fine.’ He sang the next line of the Christmas carol. ‘So what do you need me for?’
Nell eyed the finger once more. It was an occupational hazard in his job, and he seemed so jolly she didn’t want to bring his mood down. If she was a florist, she’d probably have lost most of her fingers by now. ‘The choir are arriving at 6 p.m. for it all to kick off at 6.30 p.m. The head told me that people will start to arrive from 6 p.m. because they love to get there early. Can you help me with the tea urns? I’ve brought them up, but I need to fill them. If I fill them first, they’re too heavy to get up the stairs. I’ve labelled the one that’s for hot chocolate. We’ll put the mince pies out now and the gingerbread will go out after. I thought the kids could do a decorate-your-own kind of thing, so I’ve got everything in bowls to come out once the singing has finished.’
‘Any more mulled wine? I quite fancy a drink. I’ve come straight from work.’
‘No. Sorry.’ She watched Tom move around and could see the amount of pain he was in with his finger. Two things didn’t seem right. Firstly, Tom had had two accidents in the space of about a week and secondly, he was crazily cheerful. Unnaturally cheerful. The type of cheerful people put on when something was worrying them, and they wanted to convince the world and themselves they were fine. ‘Are you all right, Tom?’
‘Yeah. Fine. Why?’ He’d answered far too quickly, and she didn’t feel reassured in the slightest. Tom began to talk of inane things and the subject seemed to be closed. If she pressed too hard, he’d clam up and she’d never get anything out of him, so she carried on with the setting-up and they laughed and joked together, and sung carols.
At five minutes to six, the first of the choir started to arrive and within ten minutes they were all there clad in their school uniform. The tiniest was in reception class and looked like a pretty china doll, the eldest, at 11, thought himself too cool for school, but their headteacher soon had them all in line.
Nell explained where she’d set up and the treats she had in store for afterwards. Even the 11-year-old was excited at the prospect. Another couple of teachers arrived bearing a makeshift nativity scene and Nell directed them to where it could go next to the Christmas tree. A small manger containing a dirty, slightly bald doll took centre stage and next to it they positioned something that was supposed to look like a donkey but was actually more like a rhinoceros. From the centre window they hung a north star that kept veering off to the west.
‘What a beautiful setting,’ the headteacher said. ‘This is lovely. Much better than our cold, draughty, not to mention damp, school hall.’
‘When will it be fixed?’ Nell asked.
‘Not for another few weeks yet. You know how these things are. We have to get lots of quotes for the work then the board has to decide who to give the job to. It’s not like the old days when we could just get a local builder to do it, or someone’s husband.’
Nell didn’t know when the old days that she was referring to were. The head didn’t look more than 40 and had beautifully glossy, long, dark hair. She seemed far too young to have the experience a headteacher needed, but when she spoke all the children listened.
‘If you don’t mind,’ the head continued, this time speaking to Nell, ‘I’ll stand in the hallway and welcome all the parents in then once we hit six-thirty, I’ll come and get the kids started.’
‘Lovely,’ Nell replied, glad that she knew what she was doing. She and Tom stayed in the dining room offering a second welcome and helping with any seating problems. ‘Where were you yesterday by the way?’ Nell asked Tom. ‘I kept ringing you. Janie said you disappeared mid-morning, not telling her where you were going and didn’t get back till four. What were you up to?’
It had been four days since Tom had cut his finger. To now have him disappearing off without telling Janie where he was going, and being cagey with her, was worrying.
Tom stared, caught off guard by the question. ‘All right, Sherlock Holmes,’ he teased. ‘I was out.’
‘Doing what?’
‘I umm, went to see Grandad Nigel.’
‘No, you didn’t because I called him, and he said he hadn’t seen you either. So come on, where were you?’ The idea that Tom had lied to her stung; what could be the reason for him not telling her the truth?
‘Just out.’
‘Why won’t you tell me?’ She tried to say it in a jokey manner.
‘Shush, people are arriving.’
‘Fine, but you’re telling me later.’
With an effort, she left her inquisition of Tom to welcome the first few arrivals. By six-thirty the room was full with parents, teachers and other pupils and an air of excitement buzzed around them. Despite her fears, she’d been able to fit everyone in which boded well for the mayor’s party. The choir fiddled and fidgeted with anticipation, waving nervously at parents. Nell scanned the room and her eyes found the young couple who had checked in earlier and the way they watched with such appreciation told her how happy they were. With Harry as well, that meant she had seven empty rooms, but with her offer running she hoped she’d have some more guests soon. Then she spotted the waitress who had served her and Tom at the Langdon Mansion Hotel. Her neck grew hot as she recalled the embarrassment. She didn’t think the shame would ever totally leave her. It seemed to have stained her blood and seeped into her bones. Though Nell smiled to try and show she wasn’t an evil con artist after a free meal, the young woman turned nervously away. She clearly felt as uncomfortable as Nell did and Nell decided a wide berth would be the best plan for both of them.
The head stood up in front and all the chatter died away to an expectant silence. ‘Good evening, everyone. Thank you so much for coming along to St Herbert’s Primary School’s Welcome to Christmas carol concert. I’m so excited to hear our wonderful choir. I know the children have been working extremely hard on their songs so without further ado, let’s welcome St Herbert’s choir.’
She walked away clapping and the children lined up in the lounge. Nell stood back, proud of the time she’d spent that morning moving the tree and decorating the windowsills. The children were framed beautifully. Standing tall in three rows with the three tiniest children in front, they gave big cheesy grins and fiddled, crossing and uncrossing arms, clearing throats, tightening ponytails. Their music teacher walked in front of them and Nell’s stomach churned with nerves for them and her. The music teacher nodded to an assistant who was stationed in the corner with a laptop Tom had helped connect to her speakers. He clicked a button and ‘Jingle Bells’ began to play out. Nell stood at the back of the room with bated breath and the children, in between nervous coughs and some rocking from side to side, began to sing.
Their voices were quiet at first, but they soon warmed up and Nell found herself surprisingly moved. She glanced around for Harry, but he hadn’t made it back and a passing moment of sadness swept over her. For the next song, a traditional carol sung without backing music, tears formed in her eyes and she steepled her hands in front of her face. There was something so wonderfully pure, heartfelt and clear in their voices and joy filled the room.
Overcome with happiness, she wiped a tear from her eye as a handkerchief flicked into her line of sight. It was Tom. Trusted, wonderful Tom and she took it before resting her head onto his shoulder. His arm wrapped gently around her waist and he gave a soft squeeze but the look in his
eyes wasn’t as happy as she expected. Tom loved Christmas and kids, but his excitement was dulled. His expression was clouded with concern and something else she couldn’t understand. It was almost like loss or grief and she had no idea why that would be. Her body responded to her worried thoughts by tightening her chest.
A crescendo of music drew her attention and from behind the children she could just make out a skinny black tail weaving its way through the rhinoceros-donkey’s legs. Mr Scrooge must have come in through the open front door and was trying to find his spot by the fire. Nell took in a breath and pointed him out to Tom. ‘Shit. Mr Scrooge has got into the nativity.’
‘You can’t disrupt the children,’ Tom whispered. ‘You’ll just have to leave him and hope he settles somewhere and goes to sleep.’
With bated breath they watched Mr Scrooge sniff and roam through the makeshift nativity scene. Only a couple of the children noticed though the cat remained oblivious. He rubbed himself against the legs of the manger almost sending it off balance, turfing baby Jesus out, then gave the rhino a very odd look and made his way back to his little corner. If anyone started sneezing or coughing like they were allergic she’d have to run and get him and take him down to the flat, but so far no one had.
Together they enjoyed the rest of the concert and when the headteacher stood to thank everyone for coming, Nell rushed to the kitchen to start bringing up the mince pies and gingerbread men, along with the decorations and bowls of icing to make things stick. Before she left the kitchen, she put a mince pie on a small plate and left it to one side for Harry, then doubled back and put two more on another tea plate for her and Tom to enjoy after everyone had left. He definitely deserved one for always being there for her. Sometimes she really did take it for granted.
Nell walked back through the door and into the dining room with the platters of gingerbread men. ‘Now for all you kiddies, I’ve got some delicious gingerbread men who need decorating. Who wants to help me?’ She was met with a chorus of excited cheers. Tom looked on and the sadness seemed to have disappeared from his eyes. ‘And for the adults I’ve got mince pies and hot chocolate with cinnamon stick or candy cane stirrers for a bit of extra festive fun. Enjoy yourselves!’
On her way back to the kitchen, Nell spotted the waitress again, chatting to one of the parents. She must have had younger brothers or sisters there. Grabbing another couple of platters of mince pies from the kitchen counter, she went back up the stairs, pushing the door with her bum and as she came through, the waitress was near her laptop at the little reception desk in the hall. Nell couldn’t tell what she was doing but she was peering around behind it. Luckily, the laptop was always closed, though she’d think twice about leaving it there in the future. ‘Can I help you?’ Nell asked, keeping her voice light and airy. Startled, the young girl stood bold upright and her cheeks turned pink.
‘No, thanks. I was just … umm, looking for an earring.’
‘They’re both in your ears,’ Nell commented dryly.
‘I mean the backs. One of the backs has come off. Never mind, though. Thanks.’ And like a frightened rabbit she darted back into the throng.
Nell scowled but shook her head and went in to deliver the mince pies. The place was so wonderfully full and the teacher in charge of the laptop had put on some more Christmas songs. Excitement hit the festive air and seeing the place so full made Nell bounce on her tiptoes with joy. As it was now the very end of November it was basically the start of Christmas and no one could fail to be filled with the joy of the season or say it was too early to celebrate. Taking a break, she found a quiet corner and sipped her hot chocolate.
‘Here,’ said Tom, brandishing a hip flask.
‘Naughty,’ she replied with a giggle. ‘Where did you get that?’
‘I know where Mrs Meggett keeps hers.’
‘Brandy? Or whisky?’
‘Brandy.’
‘Yum.’ She took a sip of the drink and took a moment to enjoy the velvety sweet warmth in her mouth. ‘It’s been brilliant tonight, hasn’t it? I’ve loved every minute of it.’
‘Me too.’
‘What was wrong with you earlier?’ she asked, watching him carefully looking for clues and any signs he was lying.
‘When?’
‘When you handed me your handkerchief? You looked so sad.’
‘Nothing.’ He shrugged. ‘I was just worried about you getting all teary.’
‘I can’t help it. There’s just something about children singing Christmas carols that gets to me.’
‘I know,’ he replied knowingly. She really did love the fact that he knew her better than anyone. She took another drink of her hot chocolate.
‘Their voices always feel like the true sound of Christmas. I don’t know what it is about them, but they carry all the excitement of believing in Santa and everything being magical. The world’s just a more wonderful place on the build-up to Christmas. Even the cold doesn’t feel as bad. What?’
Tom was studying her in a way that felt unfamiliar, yet comfortable. Almost … exciting. ‘I love how your brain works.’
‘Do you? I’m not sure it works very well at all. I wonder if I’ve got so caught up in dreams, I’ve lost focus on the hotel and that’s why business has suffered.’
‘I don’t think so. It’s inevitable the market has changed with the Langdon Mansion opening up. I think you’ve coped well.’
‘That means a lot.’ Whether it was due to the wonderful night they’d had or the festive atmosphere, his words meant so much to her that they continued to reverberate through her head causing a strange sensation in her heart. ‘Now everyone’s mingling, are you going to tell me where you were yesterday?’ Tom sighed at her questioning. ‘Is it a secret woman?’
As she said the words, she’d meant to tease but the thought of it was like someone stabbing her in the heart. She’d never really thought about it before, but it was the same way she’d felt whenever he got a new girlfriend. Until she got used to them that is, but even then, the feeling faded rather than disappeared completely. She had to stop being so protective of him.
‘It’s not a woman. I was umm … Christmas shopping.’
‘Secret Christmas shopping? I’m liking the sound of that.’ Tom smiled but it was tense. His smiles were normally so wonderfully uninhibited his whole personality shone out through his face. Wherever he’d been she hoped he had a nice time, though she wasn’t sure he had from his expression. It was hard for her not to press, but she knew she had to be patient even though that wasn’t a trait she’d been blessed with.
Once the gingerbread men and mince pies were gone, the rooms began to clear, and everyone left in a flurry of activity. It was like snow going from one or two flakes in the air to a huge whirlwind of white. One person left then everyone else had gone in the space of five minutes. Before long the hotel was empty with just her and Tom present. It didn’t seem Harry was going to arrive any time soon which was disappointing. She’d been so sure he would. But she had Tom and that was all she needed. Tom’s words that he loved how her brain worked rebounded in her brain causing a strange feeling in her chest. Nell surveyed the carnage the children had left in their wake. ‘Shall we have a mince pie before we start the clean up?’
Tom glanced at the empty platter. ‘They’ve all gone. And so have the gingerbread men. I think there might be one with one ear and half a leg missing if you don’t mind a mangled one.’
‘I wouldn’t mind a mangled one at all, but the mince pies haven’t all gone actually. Wait here.’ She sped off to the kitchen and came back with the ones she’d saved. ‘Just for us.’
They shared the mince pies in the lounge, sitting on the floor by the now lit fire, the golden glow lighting their faces. The pies were delicious, as Nell knew they would be. The pastry flaked in her mouth and the sweet, light dusting of sugar on the top gave some crunch. A strangely expectant silence formed between them.
Usually they talked about anything and everything
, never running out of things to say or laugh about. A few times Tom looked on the verge of saying something but then changed his mind and turned his eyes back to the flames. She could see from his expression that his mind was occupied but whether it was the heavy tiredness she also felt, or another matter, there was no way to tell. If she asked, he wouldn’t tell her until he was ready and if their friendship had taught her anything over the many years they’d known each other, it was that she had to wait. However hard that was.
Chapter 17
December
Walking down the high street amongst the wooden stalls of the Christmas market, Nell, Tom and Kieran chatted happily. It was Saturday night and Nell had taken a break from the hotel. After the stress of the last few weeks she really needed a night off and Zoe had agreed to cover her again.
Above them, the strings of Christmas lights twinkled against the blackness of the dark, cloudless sky and on the sides of some of the buildings small Christmas trees jutted out, their multicoloured lights aglow. Nell felt like she’d entered a magical fairy tale. The shops of Swallowtail Bay were open late, and their golden lights shone out from wide windows, highlighting pretty Christmas displays. Red tinsel framed giant stars that hung down and spun in the air, and glittering fairy lights made every shop sparkle and shine.
The artisanal shops were Nell’s favourite. They had a cheesemaker who did the most amazing Christmas gifts (she’d have to try there for Tom’s); a wine seller, and old-fashioned bakers and butchers, and seeing them open tonight, busy with chatter and laughter, made the place seem even more special. The Bake House, an amazing local bakery that had proved so popular they’d just opened another shop in Halebury, had a queue out of the door. In between the stores lining either side of the high street were small wooden huts like a traditional German Christmas market selling all manner of ornately carved and brightly coloured decorations, as well as traditional German food. The town was buzzing with life and happy, smiling people ambled past her.