Chapter 4
Simon left the bedside and returned to the bassinet. He wanted to hold the baby, to cradle her against his chest, protect her and watch her flourish. For the second time in his life he had plunged into love. Her mother had been the first,
He smiled. Her fuzzy red-gold hair would darken to match Dana’s rich auburn. The eyes opened but he couldn’t tell the color. Would they turn green like Dana’s or darken like...? He slammed that thought away. With a finger he stroked her hand. Soft. The aroma of lotion or powder reached him. Tiny fingers curled around his and his heart swelled as love swept through him.
How could Randy have demanded Dana abort this child? Anger bubbled closer to the surface. If his cousin had been alive Simon would have fought him with more skill than he’d possessed when they were children. He drew in and exhaled deep breaths. Randy had been a selfish bastard.
He turned toward Dana. “She’s amazing.” The urge to protect mother and child strengthened. What did Dana hear in his voice? He didn’t want to frighten her. He wanted to sweep her into his arms but first he had to earn the right.
“She’s wonderful and mine,” Dana said.
“What will you do now? I doubt Robert Grantlan will give you a cent for his grandchild.” He returned to the chair beside the bed. He knew little about Dana’s life other than she had married and divorced his cousin.
“Why would I ask the Grantlans for anything? Randy denied being the father loudly and often. His name won’t be on the birth certificate.”
“How will you support her?” He wanted to know as much as about what had happened in her life and in her marriage.
Dana closed her eyes. “We’ll be fine. In the divorce settlement I received the house and some money in return for not naming him as Jenny’s father. His choice and seconded with threats from Robert Grantlan.”
“Bastards,” Simon’s jaw clenched. How typical of his relatives by marriage.
Dana’s hand touched his. “They were but I prefer forgetting the short association with them.”
In her voice he heard a sliver of ice. “Guess my uncle by marriage decided you and your child weren’t suitable to be Grantlans.”
She nodded. “You’re so right.”
“How will you manage?”
“We’ll be fine until my new business grows.”
"How can you run a business and care for a baby? Is there good child care in Fern Lake?”
She laughed and the sound raised memories of Dana at the lake. Simon’s hands clenched.
“I’m running a billing service for health care professionals, especially those in solo practice. I’ll save them time and prevent re-billing. Already have five clients and several who are interested. Once I have ten, I’ll sell the house and buy a smaller one.”
“Good luck.” Actually he wasn’t sure what her service did.
“What about you. Your aunt said you’re a police officer.”
“Was.”
“What happened?”
“Worked Narcotics. Infiltrated a gang. Division head made a wrong decision that got my partner killed and me shot.”
She turned toward him. “Are you all right?”
“All healed. Shot in the upper thigh and missed all my vital parts. I asked for a transfer. When I was cleared for duty discovered the heed had shoved the request in a file cabinet. Tried to give me a new undercover gig. I quit.”
“Typical behavior.”
Was he that predictable? Did he always bail when life didn’t head the way he wanted. Another thing to consider when he had time to think. “You may be right.”
She covered her mouth with her hand to conceal a yawn. “I’m beat.”
“You worked hard this evening.”
“I did.”
“Plus the stress of visiting the funeral home. Was exhausting for me and I wasn’t in labor.”
“I don’t know how your aunt can be around then.”
“She truly loves Robert but she does escape to Florida several times a year.” He pulled the keys from his pocked. “Show me the ones I’ll need.”
She took the keys and separated two. “Front door. Key from garage into the house. You could stay there. Six bedrooms. Save you from added relative time.”
“I checked into a motel. Staying at the mansion wasn’t an option I wanted.” He looked from Dana to the baby and wished the time was right to say what circled in his thoughts. He drew deep breaths and felt his cock harden. Much more time with her and he would embarrass himself.
He pushed to his feet and bent to kiss her cheek. At the same time she turned hr head. Their mouths met and fused as though held by magnets. He slid an arm around her shoulders. Hers circled his neck. Lips parted. Tongues slid to caress. She tasted sweet. His cock pulsed against the fly of his slacks. He wanted her. He needed her. She filled the empty places of his life. He wanted to move onto the bed to cover her and ravish her until he was her only thought.
Simon put his hand on the mattress and pushed away. He couldn’t allow the fires of passion to control. He stepped back.
“Simon,” she whispered.
He groaned. What a cretin he’d become. Scalding thoughts burned. Let her go.
Dreaminess flared in Dana’s eyes. Her lips seemed swollen. He wouldn’t apologize for taking what he wanted. She’d given and taken as avidly as he had. He’d better leave before creating an impossible situation. The firestorm had burned away too many reasons telling him this was wrong.
“I’ll see you tomorrow morning.”
She didn’t speak. Her gaze followed as he backed toward the door. What was she thinking? He’d kissed her like a man released from a dungeon craved the sun. She had responded with the same urgency.
Outside her room he slumped against the wall. What now? He could do nothing until he knew where he headed. He reached the elevator.
Logistics. Time, place and the right words could make what he wanted to happen become real. He hated being in limbo but he needed to discover a new direction.
He found Dana’s car and followed the directions to her house in an upscale development built where there'd once been a single house. After parking in the garage, he entered the house and collected the suitcase and infant car seat. He set them on the walk and called a cab.
Fifteen minutes later, the cabby dropped him at the funeral home. His rental car stood alone. After loading Dana’s things he stopped at a sandwich place for a ham and cheese and a beer to go.
Back at the motel he stripped to his boxers, turned on the TV and sat at the table to eat. As he drained the beer, the kiss flooded his thoughts. His cock pulsed against his boxers. More memories rose. Moonlit nights at the lake under a massive oak, kissing Dana. He slipped off her shirt and kissed her breasts through the bra. She slid her hands beneath the waistband of his shorts to stroke him.
With a groan he stood. No sleep would arrive until he took the pressing matter in hand. He strode to the bathroom, turned on the shower, stripped and stepped inside. He ran his fingers over the head before grasping the shaft. Pulling memories of Dana’s caresses he began to pump using one hand and the other to stimulate himself. He felt her mouth close over him as she had done in the past. He thought of the times he’d brought her to climax with hands and mouth.
His movements took on speed. He pressed against the cool tile lining of the shower wall. “Come on,” he moaned. With a shuddering breath he increased the tempo. With a spurt, he erupted. He remained slumped against the tile and water poured over him.
After grabbing a towel, he dried and returned to the bedroom. He needed to put his life in order, maybe take a loan from Aunt May and return to college. He pulled on sweats and sprawled on the bed. Had the heated kiss meant anything other than two lonely people trying to connect?
* * *
Dana closed her eyes to keep memories of the kiss inside. So like and unlike other kisses they had shared. And so different from Randy’s hard demanding mouth. She needed to understand what had happened
. She’d kissed Simon as if she’d sought nourishment for her heart. He had responded with as much passion but he’d seemed embarrassed. Had the kiss been a mistake?
She knew nothing of his life since the day he’d walked out of her life and vanished. Sure he’d told her a few things but they were trivial. Did he have someone in his life? His tawny blond hair, blue eyes and dimpled smile had made her want to pant. The total picture he presented was of a man to fill dreams and fantasies. She and Simon were strangers who had known each other in a different time.
Though she regretted her marriage to Randy she was thankful for Jennifer Alexa Collins. Though her parents had wished her happiness they hadn’t liked her choice of a husband. When they had died Randy’s show of sympathy had given her hope but hope had died when he’d learned she hadn’t inherited much. She groaned. Dwelling in the past didn’t help.
What would she do tomorrow when Simon brought her things? She knew what she should do. Tell him she would call a cab to take her and Jenny home. Though the attraction remained strong how could she involve him in her plans for her life? Randy was Jenny’s father. Her dead ex-husband had made Simon’s life miserable during the years he’d lived with the Grantlans. How could he accept his cousin’s child?
Memories came in clusters. Junior high school when she and Simon had been friends who often studied at the library together. High school and the football games and cheerleading. The friendship had become puppy love and progressed to kisses, caresses and heavy petting sessions. Simon respected her desire not to go all the way until the night of graduation. That night he’d wanted sex. She hadn’t been ready to take that step. She’d wanted college and time to learn who she was. He had walked away.
Tears of sadness joined those of exhaustion. She turned on her side and wiped her eyes on the sheet. Tiredness won.
Cries woke her. Confusion addled her. She rolled on her side and her arm dangled over the edge of the bed. What? Where? The cries grew louder. Her thoughts coalesced when she touched her belly. She’d had the baby. Jenny cried. Dana eased from the bed, turned on the light and lifted her daughter. The cries stopped.
After changing the infant’s diaper, Dana sat in the rocking chair and opened hr gown. Jenny nuzzled and began nursing. Dana smiled.
A nurse popped into the room. “Was on my way. You all right?”
“Think so. She seems to know what to do.” Dana shifted the infant to her shoulder and patted her back. A burp rewarded her and she shifted her daughter to the other breast. After a second burp she rocked until Jenny’s eyes closed. Warmth and contentment filled Dana’s thoughts.
The nurse returned with a cup of juice, a sandwich and a container of pudding. “Don’t fall asleep.”
“Not in the chair.”
The nurse took the baby and placed her in the bassinet. “You missed dinner. It’s not a cooked meal but this should tide you until breakfast. I also need to check you.”
Once the nurse left Dana ate. She finished and pushed the overbed table aside. She curled on her side. How could she tell Simon she didn’t want him to take her home? That was a lie. She wanted more time to learn where he’d been and what he’d been doing.
Her body jerked. Simon knew she’d had the baby. Would he tell May? Not that she didn’t want her former mother-in-law to know. Dana gulped a breath. A fear she hidden popped into her head. What if the Grantlans tried to take her child? When Randy had been alive his unwillingness to claim paternity had made her feel safe. Would his death cause other members of the family to interfere?
May had sent a magnificent layette and a cradle that fitted onto a stand. Had these gifts been kind gestures of had there been a sinister meaning? Dana couldn’t believe May would harm her. What about Patricia or her former father-in-law?
Troubled thoughts followed her into a restless sleep. Just before six AM Jenny woke. After a second feeding Dana dozed until breakfast arrived. Following the meal a nursing assistant waited while she showered.
When Simon arrived with the suitcase and infant seat, she wore a hospital robe over the gown. She felt conflicted about the trip home.
He placed the burdens in the closet and walked to the bassinet. “She looks peaceful.”
Dana yawned. “Woke me twice last night. I think a nurse gave her water once. Would you like to hold her?”
“I would but I might drop her.”
The yearning in his voice brought a smile. “Sit in the rocker and I’ll bring her to you.”
Moments later she placed Jenny in his arms. His expression shouted pure devotion. What was happening? Dana turned her head. Simon should have been the father of her child, not Randy. Her hands clenched. The past couldn’t be redone. The desire welling in her thoughts must be denied. She sat on the bed and looked at Simon and her daughter. Tears gathered. She pressed her fingers against the ducts.
“What will you do with the rest of your day?” she asked.
“Maybe ride to the lake and eat lunch there and head to the funeral home. I need to call Matt Gray and see when we can meet. He said not to leave tow before I do.”
“You and he were quite the team in high school. I’ve heard good things about the security firm he’s started. One of my neighbors had a system installed."
“He wants to hire me.”
“Would you take a job in Fern Lake?” She hoped the eagerness didn’t show in her voice.
Simon shrugged. “I’ll see what he offers. Even though we were buddies I’m not sure I want a boss.”
She chuckled. “You never did like being pushed around.”
“You’ve got that.” The baby fussed. He frowned. “You’d better take her and I should go.”
When Dana lifted Jenny her hand brushed Simon’s. Tendrils of heat flowed from the contact. She placed her daughter in the bassinet. “She needs to be changed and fed.”
“That’s my cue. See you tomorrow.”
“If you don’t want to bother, I could take a cab.”
He touched her shoulder. “I want to take you home.”
“I would like that.”
He paused in the doorway. “See you then.”
Dana stared after him. He hadn’t kissed her today. How did that make her feel? She wasn’t sure.
After tending to her daughter she changed into the nightgown and robe she had packed. Simon wanted to take her home. A plus. She halted her racing thoughts. Don't go weaving dreams.
After dinner Madge entered the room. “Sorry about being late.”
“What happened?” Dana asked.
“Left my phone at home.” Madge handed Dana a book. “I knew you didn’t like balloons and the flowers downstairs were sad. How did you get here?”
“Went to the funeral home. As I was leaving my water broke. An old friend was there. He brought me.”
“Who?”
“Simon.”
“As in the boy who broke your heart?”
Dana nodded. “I was lucky. Labor was short.”
“When do you go home?”
“Tomorrow. Have to be out before one PM.”
Madge groaned. “I’m working. We’re getting ready for that dumb inspection. How will you manage?”
“Simon volunteered.”
Madge arched a brow. “Sounds interesting.”
“Nothing’s going to happen. He returns to the city tomorrow.” She wouldn’t mention any chance of him returning. Her friend might invent some scenario that was impossible.
Chapter 5
As he left the hospital regret and yearning dueled in Simon’s thoughts. Dana and the baby were a family that could have been his. If he hadn’t been so angry that no one had come to his graduation he might not have pushed Dana for sex. Not just anger. He’d been hurt and envious of his classmates. Listening to the congratulations had hurt him deeply and made him feel alone.
And now. Watching the way Dana’s smile bloomed when she watched her daughter had raised a desire he couldn’t quite explain.
He started the car a
nd drove toward the lake. Just before the turnoff he saw the food truck parked in the same spot as years ago. On an impulse he pulled off the road and walked to the window.
“Be with you in a few,” the gray-haired man said.
Simon waited until the man appeared at the window. “Two chili dogs and a soda. He paid for his lunch and sat on a bench near the truck. He lunched on the spicy hotdogs and memories of trips to the lake with Matt, Dana and other friends.
After wiping his mouth he drove to the parking lot overlooking the lake. He stood on the path leading through the trees. The west side had been the meeting place for his high school friends. The east had been the turf of the private school crowd. Seldom had they met and some of the meetings had brought trouble. Did the divide remain?
Instead of walking to the shore, he called Matt.
“NA Security, Matt Gray speaking. How can I help you?”
“It’s Simon. When can we meet?”
“I’m on a job that will take all day. What about tomorrow, say around three?”
Though Simon wanted to leave the moment he left Dana at home, he could wait. “Sure.”
“Going to the Grantlans after the funeral?”
“Never. I’ll be taking Dana home from the hospital. Doctor won’t let her drive.”
“Dana as in Collins who married and divorced Randy?”
“Yes.”
“What happened? I thought I saw her pull into the funeral home parking lot as I left. Did Patricia slug her again?”
Simon nearly dropped the phone. “What do you mean by again?”
“Story was all over town. Happened right after the engagement party at the Club. Patricia got in Dana’s face. Called her a tramp and not good enough for her twin.”
“What did Randy do?”
“He was busy at the bar. Patricia slapped Dana and Dana bloodied her nose. Rob dragged Patricia home. Randy laughed and toasted the champ.”
Rekindled Dreams (Moon Child) Page 4