by Alisha Paige
“Are you planning a trip somewhere?” she asked, now very worried that he would leave to shoot a commercial or judge a skiing competition, just like Rob had done for years. Sean was surprised at her intuition and felt as though she could read his mind.
“No, of course not,” he answered, realizing that he had now lied to her twice. He felt horrible. He couldn’t lie to the love of his life. It tore him up. Her eyes searched his face and she looked unbelievably betrayed. She dropped her head and stared into the bubbles as the chimes tinkled and the wind picked up more, even moving some of the bubbles around in the tub.
Sean stood up to close the small window and the tinkling faded a bit. Paige knew he was holding something back. She hoped it wasn’t something that would damage their relationship, but she had a feeling deep inside of her that it was. She didn’t think it was another woman, but she knew it was something rather big and something he wasn’t yet ready to disclose.
“Hey,” he said with a whisper as he placed her leg back into the bubbles. Paige raised her head and smiled at him with tears in her eyes. His heart melted at the sight. He was causing her pain already and it tore through him.
“Don’t cry, baby. Everything’s okay, just trust me,” he pleaded, looking her straight in the eye and taking her face in his hands. His hands where covered with bubbles and he transferred them to her cheeks. Tears fell from his fingers as her lush lashes blinked them away.
“I don’t believe you,” she cried. “I feel like something has come between us. Are you having second thoughts?” she asked softly, thinking that must be it and afraid to hear the answer.
“Shhh. No, baby, no. That’s not it. Please, honey, let’s enjoy tonight,” he pleaded as she dropped her head again.
“Paige, look at me,” he commanded with a tenderness that made her heart ache.
She raised her head and he fished around the tub for her hands and found them as he got down to her level, resting his knees on the soft rug.
“Darling, you have to trust me. Everything will be okay. Do you trust me?” Paige nodded her answer, searching his face, looking for anything to calm her fears.
“Do you love me?” he asked softly.
Paige nodded again, tears flowing freely down her pink cheeks, flushed from the warm bath.
“What is it?” she begged, now feeling sick and needing relief from the torture. What was he keeping from her and why? Why had he waited until now to tell her and how bad could it really be?
“Shh. I’ll tell you when the time is right. Let’s enjoy our night together.”
Paige was incredibly afraid now. An ominous feeling of foreboding encompassed her being, making it impossible to move beyond the fear.
“Tell me now,” she begged as she rose from the tub, grabbing a fluffy towel and wrapping herself in it.
She stood over him while he let the water out of the tub and replaced the sponge. Sean rose and held her by her damp shoulders, looking down at her, his face dark and terribly strained.
“Not tonight, baby, but soon,” he explained as he gazed into her green eyes. They sparkled in the candlelight and reminded him of Havasu Creek in the moonlight.
How he wished they were beside the falls right now, a million miles away from here. Tonight he just wanted to enjoy Paige while she was still innocent of the curse. She knew him as a man and that was all that Sean wanted.
Paige stormed out the bathroom, dropping the towel onto the floor and leaving behind a trail of tiny, wet footprints that disappeared into the lush carpet of her bedroom. Sean heard her open her closet door and guessed she was looking for her robe. He had already laid it on the bed for her. He heard her fumbling among the hangers, flinging them back and forth.
“Your robe is on your bed, honey,” he yelled after her. The closet door slammed as he entered the bedroom.
She stood there naked in the candlelight, huffing and puffing, her chest heaving in anger. Now he was hiding something from her. He had even admitted it, yet he wasn’t ready to disclose it. She was panicked and scared out of her mind. She felt as if she were back with Rob. She wouldn’t be so naive this time. Why had he decided to wait until now to display this sort of behavior? She shook and fumed all at the same time. She was angrier than she ever remembered being. Her dream was falling apart and she was overcome with a sense of hollowness and unbelievable grief.
It didn’t matter what it was that he hid from her. Just the fact that he chose to keep it hidden was enough. How could she trust someone who refused to trust her? She knew he was scared. She could sense that much, but didn’t he know how much she loved him? It would take something very terrible to tear them apart. She loved him unconditionally, so much so that she felt foolish about it. She had thought of every scenario so far and scolded herself for her vulnerability. She had already asked herself what she would do if Sean was unfaithful to her. Much to her chagrin, she admitted that she would take him back. A life without him would be too much to bear. She couldn’t imagine what his secret could be.
Sean moved toward her as she glared at him, still standing stark naked, her glistening chest heaving, her breath coming in small gusts. Her hands shook as she took the robe from her bed, sliding her arms through, fastening it around her waist. Sean stopped her hands and undid the velvety belt, pushing the robe off of her shoulders. It pooled around her damp feet as he lifted her chin with one finger. Her emerald eyes seethed with anger and betrayal and pain. The pain in her face twisted his heart and tore at his gut.
“Baby, please. Don’t be angry at me. I love you more than anything. Trust me. Everything is going to turn out fine,” he whispered as he bent his head, taking her lips and prodding her mouth with his tongue, begging for a full kiss.
Paige turned her head away, scalding him with a fierce look of denial. She bent down and gathered her robe, throwing it over her shoulders and storming down the hall, slipping on the rose petals strewn everywhere. Sean caught her before she fell and turned her around. His face was twisted with agony when he watched tears fill her eyes again. She shook like an angry child.
“Paige, please, I’m begging you. Let’s enjoy our evening together.”
She tried in vain to push his hands away and began sobbing as she collapsed in the hallway amid hundreds of petals and candles burning all around them.
“How can I enjoy tonight, Sean? You tell me how I’m supposed to make love to you knowing that you’re hiding something from me. Something that makes you sadder than I’ve ever seen you. What is it? You have to tell me.”
He only stared blankly at her, mad at himself for confessing anything at all. Why couldn’t he have waited for Aunt Bette? It would have gone so much smoother, but he had been unable to mask his true feelings. Paige knew him too well and it was breaking his heart to keep this from her. Sean hung his head, not knowing what to say. Should he tell her tonight or make her suffer longer still? Maybe he should call Aunt Bette and see if she could come over, but she was probably already in bed and he knew she had guests at the bed and breakfast tonight.
Paige pounded on his chest with her fists, her face distorted with fear. He gathered her up in his arms and rocked her, listening to a myriad of thoughts in his own head, trying to gather the right words. She screamed in frustration, sensing that he would continue to keep the secret from her. Her body was tense beneath his arms. Within his grasp, she felt like a small stone balled into one solid muscle of fear and frustration.
“Okay, okay, baby, calm down,” he crooned as she relaxed a little in his arms while he rocked her. She began to cry softly, giving in to him, knowing that the secret would have to wait and she would just have to tough it out.
Sean picked her up and carried her to the sofa where he sat down and held her on his lap. She raised her head, kissing him on the cheek as she nestled into his neck, closing her eyes, regaining her breath.
“Dinner smells great,” she whispered.
He let out a small laugh. “Are you ready to eat?”
P
aige nodded and raised her head. He looked down at her with big, sad eyes. Tears nipped at the edges of his eyelids and one escaped down his left cheek, but he quickly brushed it away. Paige’s heart sank as she stroked his cheek, gazing longingly into his eyes, telling him all he needed to know.
“I love you, Sean and no matter what, I will always love you. You can tell me when you’re ready. But, please...don’t make me wait too long.”
“I won’t,” he whispered, brushing her hair from her face and kissing her lips softly, hoping and praying that she would keep loving him, even as a wolf.
Sean’s chest swelled with pride as he smiled inside. He was so proud of her. She was willing to wait until he was ready, even though it pained her greatly to do so. She had thrown a fit like a child, but quickly recovered, regaining her composure, reminding him again why he loved her so much. This woman-child had captured his heart.
They ate lasagna together by candlelight and emptied the bottle of wine. During dinner, Paige told him about her night with Meg and her mother and seemed to forget how upset she had been only an hour before. Her voice bubbled with animation about the dresses she had seen in the bridal magazines and the guest list they had begun compiling. She told him that she’d be gone tomorrow morning to hunt for her wedding dress. The image blew his mind. He couldn’t even imagine seeing her on their wedding day. The thought of it made him want to pass out cold. All his dreams were coming true and he knew it would be the greatest day of his life.
Their talk was a welcome diversion from the episode before and the real talk that he and Aunt Bette had planned for tomorrow evening. They washed the dishes together and walked hand in hand to the bedroom after Paige watched Sean blow out what seemed like a hundred candles. She had laughed at him as he grew out of breath and pretended to faint more than once as he crawled on hands and knees. The strong odor burnt their nostrils as Paige watched the smoky trails snake toward the ceiling before disappearing completely. Sean opened her bedroom window and let the mountain air carry the candle smoke away. In the distance they heard a lonely wolf howl.
“Do you think that’s my hero?” Paige asked, thinking of the wolf that had attacked Dark Horse.
Sean growled playfully as he rolled on top of her, holding himself over her, gazing down at the woman he loved so much it hurt.
“I’m your hero,” he teased, gazing into her green eyes, now softer and more trusting.
His heart went out to her as she gave herself to him again and again while the wind played with the curtains and the wolf howled deep within the dark, forested mountainside.
Chapter 7
Paige awoke to flashes of lightning and rumbles of thunder in the distance. Rain began pelting her bedroom window as she nestled closer to Sean, pulling the covers over her shoulders. Sean responded to her in his sleep by pulling her closer with one large arm, molding her naked body to his. She kissed him on his chest and he kissed the top of her head, mumbling something inaudible into her hair. The power must have gone off. She noticed the clock radio flashing red on the far wall. She guessed it to be around five or six in the morning and judging by the way she felt, she knew it was still very early.
This was the third time she found herself awake and unable to fall back asleep. Her earlier conversation with Sean and the strange way he looked at her when he thought she wasn’t looking filled her with anxiety until she thought she would bust wide open. She prayed he wouldn’t wait too long to disclose his secret. He had made long, passionate love to her, telling her over and over how much he loved her and that they would always be together. He begged her to trust him and believe in him and she told him that she did and always would. He told her how sorry he was and how much it hurt him to cause her pain. He promised to give her a wonderful life, full of happiness and as many children as she wanted. She had given herself completely to him and they had both wept openly, mixing their tears with their kisses, mingling their hearts and their souls. They had lain in each other’s arms, whispering and kissing until Paige had finally fallen asleep from sheer emotional exhaustion. Last night had been a roller coaster. She had been scared and angry, confused and sad before she was happy and content lying in his arms.
Paige lay beside Sean for hours, listening to his breathing and tracing the muscles on his chest with one finger. It was dawn before she finally fell asleep again. Rain pounded on the cabin, coming down in thick sheets, hitting the metal roof and splatting loudly before rushing down and sliding down the rain gutters and pouring onto the driveway. Paige slept straight through it as Sean awoke to rolling thunder and bright lightning, illuminating her sleeping face. He kissed her gently, pulling her to him as he thought of the night ahead and all he would accomplish. He dreaded it deeply, but also began to see the light at the end of the tunnel. He had been thinking of this day for so long and it was finally here. Now he was anxious to get it behind them and begin their new life.
Sean couldn’t sleep so he decided he might as well get up. He tucked the covers around Paige and she sighed, smiling in her sleep. He was tempted to crawl back in and wake her with slow kisses, but he knew she needed her rest. Last night had been too emotional and tonight would be even more traumatic. He peeped out her bedroom curtain and could see nothing but buckets of rain sliding down the windows and splattering into the flowerbeds. The sky was dark and grey, mirroring his mood.
He closed the bathroom door behind him, not wanting to disturb Paige when he turned the shower on. He fetched his toothbrush. Even his toothbrush made him feel nostalgic. They had bought two of everything so that both of them would feel comfortable at each other’s cabins. He remembered the shopping spree as if it were yesterday. It had been a cold, snowy day and they were restless. They decided to go to the mall and sat at the coffee shop talking about what they would need. They finally decided that two of every necessity under the sun would be appropriate. They bought two razors, two soap dishes, two hand towels, two bath robes. They even purchased two new key hooks so they could each have their own special hook to hang their car keys on in each others’ homes. Sean had given her a wine rack, because she didn’t have one and they had taken to drinking so much red wine and port on cold winter nights. Paige had cleared out some of her closet space for him and he had done the same.
Basically, they had two homes now, which really was silly when he thought about it. They would have a new home built in Havasu Canyon and Sean would spare no expense. Money was no object to him and he planned to build Paige a castle fit for a queen. Everything would either have to be flown in or carried down on donkeys. It would take much longer, but it would be worth it. He could already picture it in his mind. He could see a fireplace in the center and grand windows in the back of the home with a spectacular view of the canyon. He didn’t want a fence in the backyard. The canyon would be his backyard and everything in it. He felt like a new king on the eve of his coronation and he laughed at himself as he thought of it. Paige would be his queen. She would be just as revered as him within the tribe, which Coming Wind said was another reason she should know the truth. She will be given an Indian name and bear his children, who would also learn the ways of the Havasupai.
He reached onto the top shelf and grabbed a plush towel. Hanging it onto a hook just outside the shower, he stepped inside and faced the hot spray. He kept his eyes closed for most of his shower, only opening them when reaching for the shampoo and soap. He just wanted this day over with and behind him. He lingered a little longer under the spray than usual, letting the fierce jets massage the tight muscles in his neck and shoulders. He finally shut the shower off only to hear more thunder and rain pelting the roof. He quickly dried off and jumped into his jeans. He lathered his chiseled jaw with shaving cream and with expert precision shaved in less than one minute. Splashing on the aftershave that Paige had given him, he avoided his gaze. He didn’t want to look at himself yet. He wasn’t prepared to see what might be lurking behind his brown eyes.
He had made up his mind and would go throug
h with the plan tonight. Nothing in life had ever scared him so much. He had faced mountain lions, bears, and rabid wolves, but they didn’t compare to the thought of hurting Paige or worse, losing her forever. He tried to concentrate on White Feather’s words, but it was tough. He kept remembering how he had said that Paige wouldn’t take the news well. Did that mean she might not want to see him for awhile? Sean wouldn’t be able to bear such a fate. Not for one night. Aunt Bette promised to tell her everything that she had experienced when she found out about Uncle Charles. Surely that would help. Paige would see that Aunt Bette stayed with him and they were happy together and they always loved each other. She would see that a normal woman could love a wolf-man. One thing scared Sean though. Aunt Bette wasn’t normal any more. She was just as much wolf as himself. She had to have raw, red meat to survive and she longed for the kill as much as he. How would Paige take that bit of news? Would Paige be afraid that she could possibly get bit one day and turn into a she-wolf? It was possible, but unlikely.
Sean made a pot of coffee and began frying some bacon when Paige walked into the kitchen, yawning and stretching, looking fully rested and beautiful as hell.
“Good morning, gorgeous. How did you sleep?”
“Like a baby,” she lied, leaning up on tip toes to kiss him on the cheek as he flipped the bacon.
“I thought you might want some coffee and bacon with your rain,” he joked, looking out the kitchen window at the rain streaming down the glass.
“What a storm last night,” she replied, fetching two mugs and pouring each of them a cup of the steaming liquid.
Sean eyed her suspiciously. “I thought you slept like a baby.”
Paige took a sip of coffee, savoring the aroma while the giant mug hid half her face. Her big, green eyes peeked over the rim at him. He could see that she was half smiling.