Lacey couldn’t hear the other side of the conversation, but judging by how tense Bryce’s body appeared, she guessed it couldn’t be good news.
“Understood, sir. Nineteen hundred hours. I’ll be there.” Disconnecting the call, Bryce sat down in the nearby chair and ran his hands over his shaved head, while blowing out a deep breath.
“You’re leaving,” Lacey stated, matter-of-factly.
“I’ve got four hours.”
“I should go then. Let you get your stuff together.” She glanced at the clock on the nightstand. “I’ve got work soon anyway.”
“C’mere,” he pleaded. Lacey slowly strode over to where Bryce was sitting. He pulled her into his lap and kissed her forehead. “I knew this would happen. That call was coming sooner or later. That’s why I wanted to keep things simple. I’ve enjoyed this. It was good while it lasted.”
Her palm ached to reach out and slap the shit out of him for brushing her off, but she refrained. She knew it would end at some point. He wasn’t sticking around. Neither of them wanted a relationship; they agreed on it. Still, his words stung.
Nodding, she stood up and set about dressing herself again. This time, Bryce didn’t stop her. Instead, he moved around the room, gathering his own things in silence.
With her hand on the door, she refused to meet his gaze, out of fear that she’d burst into tears. “Stay safe, Bryce,” she whispered as the door creaked open. Stepping into the hallway, his silence was the only answer she got as the door clicked shut behind her.
She made it to her car before the first wave of tears fell. Shooting off a quick text to Tyler, she let him know she wouldn’t be in tonight and quickly drove back to her grandmother’s house. Locking herself in her bedroom, she allowed herself to completely fall apart.
This was why she never got involved, why she shut herself off from men and dating. She always fell hard and fast. The last guy she fell for left her for someone older, with more experience. They were together for two years, when her grandmother was still in her prime. When Eloise got sick, she started devoting even more time to her grandmother, and that’s when the dickhead moved on.
Anyone who came after that wasn’t interested in her divided attention. If she needed to be there for her grandmother, it was always a problem. Bryce was the first one who seemed to have a soft spot for the only other person Lacey loved in this life.
Tin Man—Miranda Lambert
It was stupid. Absolutely insane. They were nothing more than a fling. She shouldn’t care; shouldn’t be worried. And she damn well shouldn’t feel like she had a broken heart. Sex. It was just sex.
Except she wanted more. She wasn’t programmed to do casual, no strings attached, sex.
In the short time she’d gotten to know Bryce, she went and developed some sort of feelings for the guy. He was sweet, charming, witty, and he had managed to quench a hunger she didn’t even know she had. ‘Satisfied,’ would be a pretty good word to describe their encounters.
She should have known better. She should have been more prepared. Protected her heart. Trusted her initial instinct to resist him.
Maybe then, she wouldn’t feel the tug on her heart every time her mind drifted to him.
Every little thing reminded her of him, right down to her work uniform.
The black shirt with Runaways Tavern across her chest, the skinny jeans – the same outfit she wore every night, reminded her of him. Of driving his drunk ass back to the hotel. Her favorite work skirt reminded her of how he took her in the storage room, making her body hum with pleasure.
She missed his touch, whether it was the way he held her hand, his arms wrapped around her as they tried to catch their breath, or the feel of his skin against her as he pounded into her. She missed the smell of him – that woodsy musky smell – as she buried her face in his neck or kissed her lips. Desperately, she wished that she had something of his to cling to.
Should have stolen one of his Army shirts. At least then she would have had something to hold onto as she cried herself to sleep last night.
But life goes on. The world keeps spinning – even if she wished she were more like the tin man right now.
If she didn’t have a heart, this wouldn’t hurt.
It took all of two minutes into her shift for her pep talk about getting over Bryce to fly out the window. One mention of the man she longed for, and her emotions rose in her throat all over again.
“Where’s the boy toy tonight?” Tyler questioned.
Fuck. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. He’s not worth it. Do. Not. Cry. “Deployed,” she croaked.
“Ooh.”
“Yeah, sorry you won’t get your daily dose of eye candy anymore,” Lacey deadpanned, relying on her humor to keep her from erupting into tears.
“I’m sorry, Lace, I… Should I hunt him down and kill the fucker?”
Leave it to Tyler to turn on the ‘protective older brother’ mode. He had been looking out for her since the day they met, five years ago, when she was barely old enough to work in the bar to begin with.
“Wasn’t like that. I told you, we were just having fun. Can we not talk about it anymore?” she snapped.
“Done.” He squeezed her shoulder and brushed past her. “I’ll be back in five. Need a smoke.”
Alone behind the bar, Lacey distracted herself by wiping everything down and making sure the bar was stocked for the night. When Tyler came back inside, he unlocked the front doors and it was officially game on.
The bar quickly filled with patrons stopping by to catch the NASCAR race. From there, it was nachos and burgers, beers and shots. Her mind shut off and autopilot took over. As long as she was busy, she didn’t have time to think about what, or who, she was missing.
Bryce rubbed the ache in his chest. Fuck, it hurt watching Lacey walk out the door the day before. He knew he fucked up. The minute that call came in, he shut down, pushed her away.
He went from wanting her to stay, fucking her into submission, thinking about asking her to wait for him, to just letting her go. Instead of manning up and giving in to his feelings, he took the coward’s way out and reverted to being a dick. He kicked her to the curb, like she was nothing more than a piece of ass to him. That would have all been well and good, if he didn’t actually care for her.
How the hell had she gotten under his skin in such a short amount of time?
None of it mattered. It was too late now.
His men were waiting. It was go time.
He needed to check his feelings at the gate. There was no time for his mind to be anywhere except on the mission. It was the whole reason he swore off getting involved, damn it; he should have stuck to his rules.
Rules were good; rules were there for a reason. That’s why the Army had a ton of them. It would serve him well to remember the rules from here on out.
Saying it on repeat in his mind, however, didn’t calm the storm raging in his heart.
Halfway around the world, almost to their assignment now – Bryce pulled his cell phone from his pocket and scrolled through the camera roll one more time.
Lacey’s sleeping form filled his screen.
Maybe it made him a creeper, but he couldn’t help snapping a few pictures of her as she slept beside him after one of their many rendezvous. She looked peaceful, like an angel. An angel sent to save his dark and tortured soul.
That familiar ache thumped in his chest again. Fuck, he missed her. All of this was new to him. Never had a woman gotten under his skin, much less so quickly. This shit had to stop. He didn’t need the distraction. They’d be boots on the ground in mere minutes. War wasn’t going to stop while he rubbed one out and got his heart together.
Fuck this… he was a goddamn soldier, not some heartsick romantic who was pussy-whipped.
Powering off his phone, he stuffed it back into his pocket and reviewed the information that had been given to him again.
One of his newest unit members shuffled through the aircraft and plopped down
across from him, buckling in. “Sir.”
“Reed.” He nodded at the young soldier. This would be this young man’s first deployment. Physically, the man was ready, Bryce didn’t question his ability, but Private First-Class Jerry Reed was still green under the collar. Emotionally, the boy would become a man; he’d see things he could never unsee – memories that would likely haunt him, like they often haunted Bryce… until Lacey.
Fuck. He shook his head. He wasn’t thinking about her again. Head in the game, fucker! he mentally scolded himself.
“Nervous?”
Bryce focused his attention on Reed again. “Used to it now; been doing this for a long time. You’re highly qualified; a damn good soldier, young man. Trained by some of the best. This unit? One of the best you’ll ever work with.” He didn’t boast; it was fact. He may have hidden it well but Bryce’s unit was one of the elite. They were not without loss, but his men had an excellent track record for getting things done with the least number of casualties. Something he took great pride in. “I still remember my first deployment, though. I was scared shitless.”
Reed let out a nervous chuckle. “A whole lot different than practice, that’s for sure.”
“It is, but you’ll fall into it. It’s second nature.”
“Understood.”
The carrier touched the ground, wheels squeaking on the tarmac and jolting them ever so slightly.
“It’s go time,” Bryce said.
They’d convoy from the air field over to the base, then they had less than a day until their first mission. Silently, he took one final breath and sent up a prayer.
Exiting the plane, Bryce quickly found the commander waiting for their arrival. They reviewed everything as the plane was emptied, supplies and men loaded into each Humvee.
Each man moved efficiently and quickly.
With the last of the supplies they were bringing loaded, Bryce moved to his assigned vehicle and climbed inside. Sand rolled around them as they pulled from the gates and into the desert. Bryce’s mask slipped firmly in place and peace surrounded him, even with the occasional chatter on the com radios.
“Shit,” a voice broke through. “Watch your six, to the left.”
Bryce looked out to where the possible threat had been identified. “I thought this route had been cleared. What the fuck are they doing out here?”
“Route was clear, sir.”
“Find out what the fuck is going on,” he ordered, as the convoy rolled to a stop.
He watched carefully as soldiers from the first Humvee exited slowly, cautiously approaching and assessing the situation. Private First-Class Reed was among the men outside the vehicles.
“Fuck, he’s got a bomb.”
“Motherfucker! You’re sure?”
The insurgent raised his hand and opened his robe. Bryce watched through binoculars. Sure as shit, the motherfucker was strapped. The problem was, he wasn’t alone and there was a car sitting idle near him. Chances are, he wasn’t the only thing that was rigged.
Jesus Christ, Bryce swore to himself. Minutes in, and the bad guys were already hot on their tail. There was a good damn chance there was an intelligence leak too.
Better In Time—Leona Lewis
“Lacey Lane, how long are you going to mope around this house?” Eloise pecked from her spot on the recliner, where she was currently watching reruns of The Waltons.
“Grams, I’m not moping. I’m just not feeling well.”
“This have anything to do with a certain young man who you’re no longer sneaking around with?”
Lacey glanced up from the book she was pretending to read. “Who said I was sneaking around?” Nora Roberts was doing nothing to hold her attention.
“Tsk, tsk. Give me more credit, Lacey. You were floating on air ever since that boy showed up on our doorstep. Don’t think I didn’t notice you’ve been sneaking in later than usual from your shifts. Or that you left here extra early a few days ago. I pay attention, child. Ever since Wednesday, you haven’t been yourself.”
“Guess I wasn’t as subtle as I thought,” Lacey grumbled. “I don’t want to talk about this though, Grams. He has nothing to do with it.” And you are lying through your teeth, too.
“If you say so. In the meantime, why don’t you pull yourself together and take your dear ol’ Gran out for dinner. I think some fresh air will do us both a world of good.”
The last thing Lacey wanted to do was go out to dinner. No, she’d rather burrow back down in her blanket and continue to pretend she was reading the most interesting book in the world. Getting dressed and taking Eloise to dinner meant she’d have to put on a happy face and be social. Something she really was not feeling like at the moment- it was bad enough she had to pretend at both her jobs.
“I wasn’t really asking, Lacey. I’m in the mood for Chinese. Hurry along now, so I don’t starve.”
That did it. Lacey sat up and let out a loud laugh. “Jesus, Grams, dramatic much? You, starve?”
“Got your attention, and you smiled. I win. Now, go get dressed, young lady.”
Shaking her head, Lacey stood and stretched. “Do I have time to shower, or will you wither away while you wait?”
“Don’t you smart mouth me, young lady,” Eloise teased Lacey. “I’ll be fine, but you make it quick now.”
Forty-five minutes later, Lacey guided Eloise in the door of their favorite Chinese restaurant.
Mr. Chen came rushing out from the kitchen while they made their way to their usual table. “Ah, Miss Lacey and Mrs. Eloise, long time no see. How are you both feeling?”
“We’re good, Mr. Chen. How’s the wife and kids?” Eloise smiled at the gentleman.
“Good. Very good. Kids are getting big, you know, they never stop growing. The usual, or you want to try something different?”
“I’ll have the usual, of course. You know I cannot resist your Shrimp Chow Mein.”
“Ah, of course. I make it great, just for you.” Mr. Chen looked at Lacey, “And for the young lady?”
“I’ll have the Beef and Broccoli this time, Mr. Chen. Thank you so much.”
“Give me a few minutes, I’ll have it ready for my favorite ladies.” He winked at Eloise. “Don’t tell my wife,” he laughed.
It was probably a sign that they ate entirely too much Chinese when the chef knew your name and greeted you like old friends, but it was one of the few foods that Lacey’s grandparents would spring for when she was growing up. Her grandfather had stopped by one night after work to pick up carryout as a surprise for their anniversary, and the rest is history. They’ve been coming to Mr. Chen’s restaurant ever since.
“Ready to talk about Bryce yet?” Eloise prodded when Mr. Chen walked away.
“No. Pick a different topic, Grams. Please,” she pleaded.
“We should go to the grocery store when we leave here. I need to pick up a few things.”
Lacey narrowed her eyes at her grandmother, and tried to fight the smile playing at the corner of her lips. “Is that right? What could you possibly need, Grams? Especially considering I went to the grocery store yesterday evening.”
Eloise shrugged and smiled at her granddaughter. “It’s an excuse to stay out of the house. How about Walmart instead?”
“Let’s get through dinner first.”
Lacey focused on her food, thankful for the breaks when Mr. Chen would return and talk to Eloise.
“You know what, Lacey?” Eloise said, as she settled into the passenger seat, after they finished eating and paying the bill. “Forget Walmart. I think it would be a nice day to go to the park. Don’t you think? Maybe go sit near the lake and just enjoy the sunshine.”
Lacey turned the key in the ignition and started the car, shooting her grandmother a sideways glace. Bless her. Eloise was really trying to pull her out of the funk she’d been in. Her grandmother knew that Lacey couldn’t, and wouldn’t, dare say no to her. This was one of the times that Eloise was using that to her full advantage.
“The park it is, Grams.”
Driving to the park, Lacey listened and smiled as her grandmother hummed along to the songs on the radio. Not her first choice in music, but Lacey humored her grandmother whenever they had to go out somewhere, and played classic country for her. Lacey loved listening to her grandmother when she’d decide to quietly sing along to the likes of Dolly Parton.
She pulled into an empty parking spot a short while later, and shut off the car.
“Let’s use the wheelchair this time, Lacey. It’ll be easier for the both of us.”
They both loved this park because of its accessibility. Lacey appreciated the fact that they had an area set up where she could easily wheel Eloise and enjoy nature. It had been a very long time since Eloise could make the walk on her own, or even with her walker, but every time they visited, she would say the same thing, giving Lacey permission to use the wheelchair for her.
Making their way to their usual bench, Lacey parked Eloise’s wheelchair and took a seat on the bench near her. They sat in silence for a long time. Lacey’s thoughts traveled back to the man who was probably somewhere in the Middle East – in a war zone, doing God knows what. Her chest ached, tears threatening to fall again, but she wouldn’t give in this time.
Here Without You—Boyce Avenue
Bryce looked down at the hot turkey on his plate and huffed. Sure, hot turkey beat an MRE any day of the week, but Thanksgiving in the desert was a joke. Most of his men had taken time to try and call home today. Holidays always boosted morale. They pulled together, but they were all often longing to be with their families. Who could blame them?
After spending a short amount of time with Lacey, he longed for the same thing. For the first time in his life, he wanted more, and yet, he’d managed to fuck it all up.
He considered trying to call her, but he wondered if she’d even answer the phone. Besides, calling her would be admitting they were more than a passing fling. He may give a damn, but he wasn’t ready to put a label on it.
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