by J. H. Croix
I had made Zoe a promise I would finish resubmitting my paperwork to finalize my legal courses. It had been a full three years since I’d had to drop out when my mother was sick. I only had another month left before the timeframe expired for me to simply re-enroll without re-applying. I needed to resubmit all the paperwork.
“I have three weeks left,” I offered.
Zoe glared at me. “This is bullshit. You were one of the top students in our class. Don't get me wrong, you're an amazing paralegal, and I will feel lost without you, but you need to be an attorney. We've already agreed you'll join the practice with me, so do it!”
“How are we gonna find a good paralegal?” I countered.
“I don't know, but we will. Don’t break your promise,” she ordered as she spun around and returned to her office.
My chest tightened. Zoe was the best kind of friend. I almost started crying. She challenged me personally and professionally, and she had my back every step of the way. I only had a semester left of coursework to complete and then I had to clear the hurdle of passing the bar. Zoe would be there for this and be there to nudge me out of my comfort zone with Finn. Although I couldn’t banish my worries over him, she might persuade me to try.
Chapter 13
Finn
I stared at my phone and bit back another laugh. Jana’s texts had become the highlight of my days, if only because they were so ridiculous. She’d texted me earlier to tell me our dinner date was now a double date with Ethan and Zoe, which was perfectly fine with me. Selfishly, I wanted her all to myself, but a dose of sanity might keep my body in check. It felt as if I were walking into a tunnel when it came to her. My focus was so narrow, I couldn't see beyond it. Not to mention, Ethan was a nice guy, and though Zoe was usually on the opposite side of me in the courtroom, I respected the hell out of her as an attorney. She didn't stoop to dirty tricks, and she was always straightforward.
After that text, Jana had sent a flurry of ridiculous pictures to me. Little did I know there was an entire industry dedicated to making naughty confections. I'd seen everything this afternoon, learning the penis cake on her phone was only the beginning. I'd seen breasts topped with elaborate icing concoctions, an entire human body mapped with icing, and a cock cake mounted bizarrely on the hood of a classic Ford Mustang. I shuddered to think of how the owner of the car had felt if they ever saw it.
I slid my phone into my pocket and headed home to change. No matter how many times Jana begged me to meet her for dinner in my uniform, I wasn't biting. I reasoned our impulsive encounter in my car was just a slip because I had actually been on duty and we’d had lunch together. But I couldn't go out of my way to wear my uniform just to please her. No matter how bloody tempting it was.
After a quick shower, I left to meet Jana. When I knocked on her door, she swung it open with a sound clattering in the background simultaneously. She spun away from the door. “Smokey! What the hell are you doing?” she called.
I looked over to see Smokey chasing a ball of yarn across the room, a broken vase, water and flowers scattered on the floor by the kitchen counter behind him. I bit back a laugh and watched as Jana walked across the room. I didn't mind the view in the slightest. She was wearing a skirt again, this one a little flirty number that twirled at the bottom. It hugged her hips and then flared out just above her knees. She wore a pair of black cowboy boots over leggings with a loose blouse atop her skirt. Her blouse was almost sheer purple silk, her black bra visible through it.
I doubted the effect she intended was for me to get hard upon sight of her. I swallowed and watched as she quickly picked up the yarn, snagged the dustpan, and started sweeping up the broken vase.
“Do you need some help?” I asked.
She glanced up with a grin. “Nope. All set.”
After she dumped the broken glass in the trashcan in the corner of the kitchen, she rescued the flowers and gestured to a cabinet by the kitchen sink. “Could you grab a vase out of there and fill it with water? I think I can salvage these.”
I stepped to the cabinet and found the vase she was gesturing to. Turning, I asked, “You sure he won’t just knock them over again?”
She shrugged. “Maybe, maybe not.”
Smokey looked entirely unrepentant and sat on the back of the sofa cleaning his paws. I filled the blue glass vase with water and set it on the counter where Jana directed. I slid my hands in my pockets and watched while she arranged the flowers in the vase.
Smokey took that moment to do another flying jump into my arms. I caught him by a small miracle. “Bloody hell, Smokey,” I said with a chuckle as I adjusted my hold on him.
Jana glanced at us and giggled. “Just be glad he likes you.”
“Is he a test?” I asked.
She stopped what she was doing and stared at me. For a moment, her gaze sobered and something flashed in her eyes. The air between us hummed.
She gave her head a little shake and laughed softly. “No. Smokey’s not a test. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad he likes you though. That's always a good sign, right?”
“I don't know if cats are as reliable as dogs about that,” I offered.
“Probably not.”
She rinsed and dried her hands quickly, before snagging her raincoat off the hook by the door. “Are we ready, or do you want to just stay here and hold Smokey?” she asked with a sly grin.
“We're ready,” I said, depositing Smokey carefully on the back of the couch. He eyed me balefully and then set to grooming his paws again as I turned away.
In short order, we arrived at the restaurant where we were meeting Ethan and Zoe. The car ride alone with Jana had been a special form of torture. Strawberries. Again with the strawberries. I was the human equivalent of Pavlov’s dog. I caught a whiff of Jana, and my entire body tightened in anticipation now.
She eschewed her hood as we dashed through the rainy evening. She was laughing when we pushed through the door, brushing her damp hair out of her face. I glanced down and beat back the urge to kiss her. Her skin was damp from the rain, and her eyes bright. Bloody hell. She was dangerous for my sanity.
Jana glanced around, her eyes lighting up when she saw Ethan and Zoe in a back corner. She snagged my hand in hers and pulled me through the restaurant. She was a challenge to my manners. She didn't wait for anyone, or anything.
I allowed myself to be tugged along in her rather forceful wake, enjoying the swing of her luscious hips and the flare of her skirt as it twirled around her knees. My cock enjoyed it quite a bit as well. I forced my eyes up, reminding myself sternly that we were in a public place.
Ethan caught my eyes and flashed a grin as we reached the table. “Eh, mate. How is it?”
“Quite good. Yourself?”
“Good, good,” he replied as we slipped into the booth across from them.
The waiter, decked out with a red and green bowtie to match the holiday decorations scattered through the restaurant, arrived to serve water for the table and then take our drink order. Zoe and Jana elected to share a bottle of wine, while Ethan and I ordered beers. The waiter reeled off some specials and then left. Zoe smiled over at me. I realized this was the first time I'd ever seen her with her hair down. In her professional world, she was a buttoned up lawyer—her hair always up, and always dressed tidily. Seeing her with Ethan, she was much more relaxed with a softer look to her. Bloody hell, he was smitten with her. He had his arm slung across her shoulders and chatted away, touching her in any small way he could as conversation continued. We got through the pleasantries.
Ethan asked how I was doing with work, and then there was the expected awkward moment, impossible to avoid when I ran into former fellow players. I'd known it was inevitable with him.
“So you’ve adjusted well then?” he asked.
I glanced over at him and shrugged. “Life’s a roll of the dice as it is,” I replied.
Ethan held my gaze for a beat. It had been close to a decade since that time of my life. While Ethan was st
ill standing and playing along with a few others I'd known back then. Many others weren’t. Injuries were fickle. I wouldn't say I didn't experience regret, but I had largely let it go. I hadn’t had any choice in the matter.
Ethan nodded after a moment. “I was sorry to see how things played out,” he finally said.
I shrugged again. “It was what it was. Things happen, and you either deal with them and move on, or you don't,” I offered.
I felt Jana’s gaze on me and glanced to her. If she thought anything of that brief conversation, I couldn't see it in her eyes. She shuttered them quickly and snagged her wine glass to take a sip. She glanced over to Zoe. “I don't think I told you that when Sergeant Finn here responded to my little car accident, and I let him look at my phone, I totally forgot about my screensaver.”
Zoe’s eyes took on a gleam, and she laughed softly. “Ah, so you must’ve had a good laugh,” she said, looking my way.
“Oh yes,” I replied with a chuckle.
Ethan looked between us. “What's so funny?”
“Remember Daisy’s bachelorette party?”
“Yeah?” Ethan countered, circling his hand in the air.
“Well, Olivia had that crazy bakery cater it, and all the cakes were…”
Ethan finished for her. “Oh, those bloody cock cakes,” he said with a shake of his head. He caught my eye, nudging his chin up. “This crew is crazy when they get together. Have you met Daisy? She's Tristan’s wife.”
“Can't say I have. I haven't seen him in a while,” I explained.
I hadn't been particularly close to any of them, but we ran in the same circles just by virtue of what we did back when I was playing. Then, my accident happened. With a few of them here in Seattle while I tried to settle into my life, I saw them here and there. I'd encountered Liam a few times, and we grabbed a beer now and then. Same went for Ethan, as well as Tristan and another player from Britain, Alex. Yet, none of them had been a big part of my life after my accident.
I surmised it was due to their likely discomfort with the fact that I was no longer playing while they still were. It wasn’t worth dwelling on, so I didn’t.
“How is Tristan anyway?” I asked.
“He’s downright domestic. The most committed bachelor I ever knew, and he fell for Daisy like a rock sinks to the bottom of the ocean,” Ethan said with a wry grin.
I chuckled. Tristan had been a dedicated bachelor, not a flirt per se. In fact, he kept to himself for the most part. He made no waves and stayed out of the gossip circles. I’d been as surprised as anybody to find out he was getting married.
“Bloody right. He ribbed me a bit back when I was engaged.”
Ethan rolled his eyes, sifting his fingers through Zoe's hair where his hand rested on her shoulder. He lifted a shoulder in a slow shrug.
“Aye. He ribbed me about you,” he said, turning his gaze to Zoe and dropping a kiss on her cheek. He straightened and caught my eyes again. “Though he knocked some sense into me too. You couldn't talk me away now,” he said it, glancing to Zoe again, the look in his eyes heated and unmistakable.
Zoe’s cheeks flushed slightly, and she squeezed his hand where it rested on her shoulder before reaching for her wineglass. Glancing over to us, she took a sip of her wine and then cocked her head to the side. “So, I hear you’re handling a messy case.”
I knew exactly which case she was talking about. It had been splashed all over the news for the last few days.
“That I am.”
“Which case?” Jana asked.
“The one the news won’t shut up about. Ray Sutton got arrested for beating the crap out of his wife,” Zoe said bluntly.
Jana looked to me, her eyes widening slightly. “That’s yours?”
“It’s not mine, but I’m the sergeant for the division handling it. My part is pretty much done.”
“Mr. Family Values my ass,” Jana said with a roll of her eyes.
“Bloody relieved you're not his defense attorney,” I said when Zoe nodded along with Jana.
Zoe grinned. “I wouldn't have taken his case even if he asked.”
“No?” I countered.
“Definitely not. I don't usually take cases like that. I'm not saying I rule them out completely, but I try to limit my clients to people I feel like I can legitimately defend. With good reason, Ray Sutton’s not on that list. From everything I've seen about the case, you guys have a solid one.”
“We do. For the moment,” I added.
Zoe nodded with a sigh. We didn't discuss the case further. I was aware Zoe knew as well as I did that despite our witness and despite our currently cooperative victim, both of those factors could change. Our weakest link was Sutton’s estranged wife until we got through the case. I'd even handled DV cases where we got all the way to trial, got through the conviction and later had the victim ask the DA if we could have the charges vacated. Usually bullied into making the request by her abuser.
Conversation moved on to lighter matters with Ethan keeping up a steady stream of teasing. He clearly loved to ruffle Zoe’s feathers. She was a more serious counterpoint to his lighthearted, playful personality. I glanced to Jana, considering how we might be perceived. When I was younger, I was as much of a tease as Ethan. Maybe not quite as shameless. I played my cards closer to my chest than him and kept things less public.
Yet, Jana was similar in that way. She had an edge to her—both teasing and bold. After seeing her interaction with her ex, I sensed that quality of hers was more superficial, almost a defense for her. My heart gave a hard thump. She was a flame I couldn’t look away from.
Chapter 14
Jana
I glanced sideways at Finn, willing my pulse to behave. I felt like a foolish girl around him. This double date idea was turning out to be a disaster, if only because it served to make me like him even more. He was a gracious and fun date. He and Ethan chatted about their early days of playing football back in London, regaling Zoe and me with a few amusing tales. I’d have expected him to perhaps be uncomfortable about the pro sports career he’d waved goodbye to after his car accident, but he seemed rather circumspect about the whole thing. When Zoe and I were chatting about a few work matters, he actually paid attention. He and Ethan teased about what it was like to adjust to life in the States, while he commiserated with Zoe about the backlog at the courthouse.
In short, he was a well-educated, gracious and amusing dinner companion. Oh, and sexy as hell. He also had his hand on my thigh for most of dinner, which sent my pulse through the roof, made my panties wet, and essentially made me crazy. I felt too vulnerable, and my body kept betraying me time and again. I was restless and uncomfortable with how much I felt. Needing a moment to escape from the sensory overload, I excused myself, threading through the tables to the ladies room. I was relieved to find no one was there.
After I went to the bathroom and washed my hands, I ran icy cold water over my wrists. I was so hot and bothered by Finn, I needed something to cool me off. I splashed water on my face and dabbed it dry with a towel, my eyes catching on the Christmas lights strung around the mirror. The holidays were when I missed my mother the most. I forced my thoughts off of her and pointlessly washed my hands again. The door swung open, and I glanced over to see Zoe walking in. She leaned her hips against the counter.
“Okay, what the hell is up with you?” she asked.
“What do you mean?” I countered.
I dried my hands off and tossed the paper towel in the trash. Reaching in my purse, I pulled out a tube of lip gloss.
“Don't you have to go to the bathroom or something?” I asked, casting my eyes sideways to Zoe.
She rolled her eyes. “Sure,” she replied, pushing her hips off the counter and stepping into the stall.
“That doesn't mean I'm gonna stop talking to you,” she called out.
I couldn't help but grin. When it came to women, a true friend was one who would carry on talking about important matters while she went to the b
athroom. That was precisely what Zoe did.
“You seem stressed,” she called out.
I unscrewed my lip gloss and swiped it across my lips, spending too much time getting it just so.
“Why do you say that?” I called in return.
The toilet flushed, and Zoe stepped out of the stall, coming to the counter to wash her hands. She caught my eyes in the mirror as I rolled the lip gloss across my lips once again.
“I said you look stressed because you look stressed. I know you. Trying to make that lip gloss last a whole week?” she asked with a little laugh.
I sighed and leaned away from the mirror, closing up the tube and circling it in between my fingers. I turned away, leaning my hips against the counter beside her.
“I don’t know. I guess I’m stressed because Finn’s really nice.”
Zoe turned the faucet off and gave her hands a shake, reaching for the paper towels. Drying her hands, she turned to lean her hips against the counter at my side and glanced over to me.
“Uh-huh. He’s a nice guy,” she replied. Looking at me quietly, her teasing gaze softened. “Why is that a problem?”
I shrugged. “Well, it's not. Except I really like him.”
She tossed the balled up paper towel in the trash before looking back. “That’s good. You actually like a nice guy. There's nothing wrong with that. Why don't you just relax?”
My throat tightened. I didn't know why Finn was having this effect on me. I hadn't thought much in a while about the shambles of my life after everything went wrong with Rick. In hindsight, I was more in lust than in love with him. Yet, I had liked him, and I’d had no idea what an asshole he was. I suppose the whole mess made me doubt my judgment more than I'd ever considered. My defense had been to keep things casual, and to have fun flirting because I was pretty good at it. Still spinning my tube of lip gloss in my fingers, I chewed the inside of my cheek and eyed Zoe.
“I don't know. What if he’s secretly an asshole and he’s good at hiding it?”