Ryan met my gaze one more time, “Please, just hurry.” I told him.
His eyes watered as he bent to kiss my forehead and tuck my face against his neck, like he was trying to protect and hide me from the man behind him, who remained there, watching and stroking himself.
Ryan began to move in and out of me, breathing heavily and after a few more moments, in answer to my plea, he groaned and began to slow his pace right before he pulled out of me. The man behind him grunted soon after with his own release. During the whole experience, I looked into the sky, praying that once he was finished with me, that this would all be over and they would leave me alone, just like he said they would do.
“Well done, boy. I’ll make a man outta you yet.” He stated as he tucked himself back into his pants. I let out a sigh of relief. If he did that, then I thought it was safe to assume he didn’t intend to take a turn. “Get yourself together, boy. We need to move on.” He said before walking back to the others.
Ryan was already trying to cover me with my pants before moving to stand. I stayed on the ground with my knees pulled to my chest, hugging my pants to me like they were a lifeline. I stared into the brush, completely and utterly lost.
Ryan was still looking down at me with pity and remorse when the leader called for him to hurry the hell up. Ryan cursed under his breath. “Stay here until we’re gone, then I want you to run like hell away from here. I don’t want you here if they decide to come back for you.” He waited for me to speak, which was not going to happen. Before he turned around, he paused again. “I know I said this already, and you have no reason to believe me, but I am so, truly sorry. Believe it or not, I only wanted to save you from something much worse. I know I’m a monster to you for what I’ve done, but please understand that I would never have done it if I felt I didn’t have to.” His voice sounded constricted and harsh, but this time, he walked away and didn’t look back. I heard them leave, but I did as he said and stayed where I was until they left. By the time I was clothed again and on my feet, I ran in the opposite direction as fast and for as long as I could.
“Which one do you want?” James turned to me with two cans, bringing me back to the present. His grin slipped as he looked at my face.
“What?”
He looked down, sadness and anger radiating through him as he met my eyes again. “Are you thinking about it again?”
James had asked about a month into us living together where Azami’s father had gone. I thought about lying to him, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it, so I told him. I left out the details, other than it happened. We didn’t talk about it and I tried not to think about it but sometimes, the memory snuck in. I knew it wasn’t a good memory, but in a way, Ryan did give me the best thing in my life, Azami. I couldn’t, no matter how hard I tried, hate him, but I still hated the situation. He did what he did to me, but he also saved me from a far worse fate, and I believed that now.
“Yeah, sorry.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” He offered.
I shook my head.
“Bastard,” James mumbled.
“James. Language.”
He mumbled something under his breath and held out three cans to let Azami pick hers first. By the time he reached me, he gave me a small smile, dropping the subject. I instantly grabbed the left one before he pulled them away.
“You are so predictable,” he said.
“Why?”
“Because you always pick left. Left hand, left turn, anything to do with left or right, it’s always left. Why is that?”
“It’s pretty stupid, actually. I pick left because I’m left handed. Left is always better, I think.”
“That is pretty stupid.” He laughed as he opened his and Azami’s cans, then tossed the can opener to me, “Ready? We can look together this time. One. Two. Three,” James counted slowly, each word drawn out. When he reached three, we showed each other our cans.
“You got baked beans.” I told James.
“You got olives.” Lucky me.
“Az, baby, let mommy see what you got.” She held her can out for me, “Baby, you got Oooh, O, Ooo’s,” which is what she used to call spaghettios when she first learned how to talk. We always tried to save the spaghettios for her since they were her favorite. Plus, a can would last her for two meals. Needless to say, she eats them quite often.
“Stedioooo!” She squealed.
I handed her can back and we dug in. After we finished, we packed up the bedding and hopped in the front seat.
“You want to drive again?” I barely got the words out before he was climbing over me. I laughed and scooted over to the passenger seat to pull Azami onto my lap. He started the car and put it in drive, pealing out as we drove off.
The speedometer hovered at ten miles an hour as we drove down the overgrown road. Finally, we rolled to a stop as James gazed at our surroundings. We both seemed to be holding our breaths, scanning the scenery. There were surrounded by nothing but trees, hills, tall grass and bushes, everywhere. There were no entrances in sight.
“Do you see anything?” I asked.
“No.”
“Maybe we need to get out and look.”
He shrugged, but we all exited the vehicle and looked around. We walked a good fifty yards around the car in all directions, finding nothing but a lot of those awesome rocks in our shoes and the hot sun baking down on our skin.
“I don’t think there’s anything here.” James’s voice was low, disappointment thick in his words, “But this is where my teacher said it would be. What should we do now?” He asked me expectantly.
“I don’t know. I thought for sure it would be here.” I didn’t know what to do. We didn’t want to waste all of our gas to get back to the highway. It was also really hot and I didn’t know if we would be able to walk the remaining miles to look around with Azami. “Why don’t we spend the night here and look around some more tomorrow? After that, we can head back to the gas station and maybe find other routes through here.” James nodded to me, knowing I didn’t really have a plan. Winging it was my usual MO.
We walked and drove some more for most of the day, looking for any kind of clue to show us where to go next, but there was nothing. The day was giving way to night as we retreated to the car. Other than Azami running around and doing her hyper three-year-old thing, it was quiet. There was too much on both of our minds to talk out loud. After dinner, we laid down and cuddled up with the blankets. I snuggled up to James after Azami fell asleep and started to rub his hair.
“I’m sorry.” I whispered to him.
I heard him sniffle and held him tighter.
“S’ok. I kind of expected it, but I just really wanted it to be true, more than anything.” He paused before continuing. “I like it when you rub my hair. My mom used to do it when she tucked me into bed every night.”
I smiled behind him and continued to rub his hair. Even though he seemed much too old now to let me do this, it was nice to know he enjoyed it. He still had that childlike innocence to him, and I always prayed that things would be good enough for all of us one day, and he could continue being the little dreamer I met over a year ago.
“Goodnight, James.” I whispered.
“Goodnight, Lillie.” He whispered back.
Long after everyone fell asleep, I watched the stars through the sunroof of the station wagon. Life was perfect when it was this simple, just staring at the stars. I used to stare at the stars when I lived in foster care, and then again when I was pregnant, wondering what I was going to do with my life, especially with a child. I remember how scared I was of giving birth, how I was going to provide and protect my baby when I was still so young myself. I always looked to the stars, as if I could find the answer to all my questions in them.
I must have drifted off, because the next thing I knew, I was woken up by a clicking noise. My eyes flew open but I didn’t dare move. Someone was standing next to the driver’s side door, pulling on the handle.
James woke from my startled gasp.
“Don’t move.” I whispered to him.
I froze, my own muscles trying to figure out what to do. My mind was racing. Was this a gang of Infected looking for food? Could it be other cave people? Could others have survived? Were we about to die?
Chapter 5
“Who is it?” I whispered to James, trying not to move and wake Azami while I spoke.
He closed his eyes to think, and I watched as a tear rolled down his cheek. I knew then that we were doomed. However, James did something unexpected. He jumped over the front seat and unlocked the door.
“NO!” I cried out, pulling on his clothes, trying to stop him. He fell onto the floor of the back seat as the shadowy figure entered the car. I threw myself in front of him, ready to fight and die to protect him and Azami.
“No Lillie, you don’t understand.” James said, trying to push past me.
“Back up!” I screamed at the figure. What the hell was going on with James, putting his life in danger by going after this lunatic? I could hear Azami crying behind me and I knew I was going to have to fight for all of us. I grabbed the sack of cans and swung it with all of my might. The bag smashed against the figure and they collapsed onto the front seat, groaning.
“No. Lillie. It’s alright.” It took me a minute for James’s words to sink in. I paused to look at him, waiting for his explanation. “It’s my Uncle. He’s alive! That means its here―they’re here! Ian must have told them about this place too.” He shrieked.
“You’re Uncle?” I repeated, confused. The adrenaline was still pumping to fast through my veins. He’s never mentioned an uncle before now.
“Yeah, and he came with other survivors,” He pointed to the windows where other figures were beginning to form. Out of instinct, I threw myself over James and Azami again, keeping myself over them, wrapping my arms tightly around them and pulling them as close to me as possible.
James only laughed. He slithered out from under me with ease, “It’s here. The place that we’ve been looking for. It’s here.” He says as he begins to unlock the back door.
The figure in the front seat moaned again and crawled back out of the door. James jumped out before I could grab his shirt and ran around the front of the car.
“Uncle, you made it!” He threw his arms around the dark figure outside my window.
I climbed out of the car in a hurry to get into a better position, in case things didn’t go down the way James assumed they would. The man seemed to be hugging him back; it was hard to tell in the dark, and now the group of shadows were gathering around them.
“I can’t believe you remembered how to get here, James.” the supposed Uncle was saying. “You were so little and it’s been so many years since the Flash. We’d given up hope on ever seeing you again.” His Uncle said as he hugged him again, genuinely holding him like he was making sure that he was really there.
“Uncle, how did you find this place? Oh, and I want you to meet Lillie and Azami.” James gestured to us. “I met them a little over a year ago and she’s taken care of me. They’re family to me too.” He looked over at me and smiled, rambling on enough so his Uncle couldn’t get a word in.
“More like you take care of us.” I told him, brushing his arm. “Hi, it’s nice to meet you.” I held out my hand to his Uncle.
“Well, thank you, Lillie. We’re very happy to have him here and safe.” He said while shaking my hand. He looked down to Azami and smiled. “Come. Let me show you our place. I have a surprise for you too, James. I’ll explain everything once we’re back.” He said, placing a hand on his shoulder.
“A surprise? For me? What is it?” When James looked at me, his face was alive with excitement.
“If I told you, it wouldn’t be a surprise, now would it?” He smiled at James, who was now keeping pace with the older man. “You guys grab their stuff and meet us in the main cavern.” He hollered at the people he was standing with.
I grabbed my backpack and put it on. I didn’t want to take the chance of losing it. We walked over three mounds and stopped. On the backside of one of the mounds was a dark hole, cut into the hill. It was some sort of grotto in the rock, blocked by another large rock about a foot in front of it. No wonder we walked right by it… Several times, actually. James’s Uncle ducked into the hole and James followed behind him, disappearing into complete darkness. I was hesitant at first, but then James reached back out and took my hand.
“Come on. We’re okay now. Trust me.”
Trust him? Of course I trusted him. If he said that we were alright, then I knew we would be. We ducked into the dark hole as the sun rose behind us and continued walking. When we entered the cavern, we were forced to duck down, but once inside, you could stand straight. In fact, the ceiling of the cave was so high, you could put someone on your shoulders.
The tunnel went downhill for about thirty yards, and then leveled out for another twenty, then the tunnel gave way to a large, open room. The fresh morning sun shined down through the cracks in the ceiling, lighting up the dust particles in the air.
Once we entered the big room, more people surrounded us, surprised at having unexpected visitors. The last time I’d seen this many people was before the Flash. James’s Uncle, whom I refer to as just Uncle, asked the others in the cave to keep their distance for the moment as he continued to the other side of the cave, stopping at the entrance of another tunnel.
“Hey! You guys get in here. I have something to show you.” He waits until we reach him before he says, “You’ll have to excuse so many lurkers. We woke early this morning to overhaul one of the gardens. Normally, most people are still sleeping this early.”
As he finished speaking, four young men exited the tunnel and walked toward Uncle. The two in front resembled one another, appearing related. They were tall, around six feet, and toned. A black haired man stood off at the back of the group, his long hair hanging in his eyes. He was a few inches shorter than the other guys, but broader.
Then there was the one with dark brown hair. My focus was drawn to him, even while trying to assess everyone else. His features were stern, but his skin looked soft. He was taller than his friends and held a good amount of muscle on him. They all paused after exiting the tunnel, looking at the older man expectantly. Uncle pointed in our direction, their eyes following his finger. That’s when I locked on the fourth man’s eyes; the bluest eyes I have ever seen, until Azami was born.
His mouth parted slightly and my heart picked up speed. My throat went dry and my vision began to blur, as if I might pass out. The look on his face gave it all away; he recognized me, just as I had recognized him. Sometime during all the commotion, I position myself in front of James and Azami, blocking them from view.
“We have some new guests.” James’s Uncle continued. “This here is Lillie and her little one, Azami.” I shook the confusion from my thoughts and nod in everyone’s direction. “And I believe you already know James.” He said, smiling directly at blue eyes―Ryan, my attacker.
James stuck his head out from behind me, looking for who his Uncle was talking to. “Did you see who he was talking about?” I asked James before I would let him out from behind me.
“No, I didn’t see any of this.” James said, confused.
I paused before deciding to let James step out, revealing him fully. Ryan’s face went white, like he’d seen a ghost. I looked at James and his face was a mirror image of Ryan’s.
“James?” Ryan spoke, the name a disbelief.
“Ian!” James screeched.
My eyes raced back and forth between James and Ryan. James’s brother was here, he survived, and he was the very same man who had taken something from me, as well as giving me something I couldn’t live without.
“James!” Ryan yelled again, running to him. Ryan grabbed James up into a huge bear hug and bounced around in a circle. “I can’t believe you made it. You’re so big. How did you get here?” He couldn’t contain his exciteme
nt that his little brother was here and in his arms. He even seemed to have forgotten that I just walked back into his life. “I didn’t think I would see you again.” Ryan’s voice cut off.
“Ian? Ian? I can’t breathe.” Ryan reassessed his hold and laughed, dropping James back to his feet.
Looking at the two of them together, I could see a lot of similarities between them that I never would have thought of before. The most striking thing were their eyes. James had eyes that were the color of a warm summer’s day. So close to Ryan’s, I couldn’t believe that I’d never considered it before. Azami and James did have some similar features. How was I supposed to know that they would be related? That thought struck me.
James was Azami’s Uncle.
James backed up a few steps to grab my arm, without taking his eyes off Ryan, as if he would disappear.
“I want you to meet Lillie. We found each other a little over a year ago.”
Ryan snapped his eyes back to mine, trapping me, knocking the air from my lungs. Surprisingly, fear was the furthest thing from my mind―a different emotion was tickling and twisting in my gut. Nervousness?
Azami chose that moment to reach her tiny hand into mine and whispers, “Mommy, I’m hungwy.”
Ryan’s attention darted to the little girl at my side, hiding her face in my leg. His gaze began snapping back and forth from me to her, asking a million questions, but he got his answer when she looked up at him. He saw his own eyes. His gasp is so soft, I think I’m the only one who hears it, or knows what it means.
Ryan clears his throat and swallows, looking at me again. “Thank you, Lillie, for looking after my brother.”
I nodded, unable to speak or meet his gaze, but knowing he was staring directly at me. I couldn’t let on to James who his brother was to me. Without knowing who Azami’s father was, he already despised him. I couldn’t be responsible for James hating his brother, and I couldn’t be the one to hurt him by telling him. I knew instantly that James could never know the truth.
Flash Series (Book 1): Infected Page 5