by Abby Ayles
“I should be delighted.”
She could see his joy. It was evident, pure, pouring into his dark eyes, so that they gleamed.
The thought that she affected him so, that she had such power to cause him so many beautiful emotions shook her.
It both awed and humbled her.
He rose to his feet first and, as he did so, he held out his hand to her. She took it, rising easily.
Together, they walked out of the dining room, the house, and into the gardens.
Amy followed, remaining a few paces behind; close enough to fulfil her chaperone duties, yet far enough to not hear a word of their conversation.
Judith let a sigh slip as she looked up to the skies.
“You were right, Your Grace. It is a stunning sight.”
Though the hour was late, the night was filled with such light, it was as easy to see their way as though it was dawn.
“I am glad you like it. The evening air is just as charming,” he responded.
She took in a deep breath, letting the clean air wash over her.
“Yet again, you are right. It feels like centuries since I last enjoyed a walk like this.”
“You used to take night walks back at your home in London?” he asked.
She nodded. “Yes. Sometimes, alone with Amy as company. Other times, with one or both of my parents. I enjoy a good walk very much.”
“How about your sister? You mentioned you had one.”
Judith was pleased he had noted that piece of information, and that he remembered.
“Yes, Theresa. She is four years older and has not been home in a while.”
“Is she married?”
Judith shook her head. “No. She has been touring the world. She sings. Famous as the English Nightingale. After conquering the whole of England, she decided to bless the rest of the world with her gift. Father gave his blessings, so she went on her way. She writes home often. When she returns, she shall be married to her betrothed. He waits for her with so much love and loyalty.”
Lord Henry was such a patient man, and he was evidently devoted to her sister. Sometimes, he traveled overseas to see her. When he returned, it was always with news of joy.
“The English Nightingale. Why I do believe I might have heard of her talent. Now I see why you say she is the gifted one.” There was only awe and admiration in his voice.
It made Judith smile.
“Of course, you would have heard of her. Yes, Theresa is quite special. Everyone loves her. I, even more,” she said, a fond smile on her lips. They had always been close, and Judith missed her sister very much.
“You are special as well, my lady. Very much so.”
The duke said it so simply, as though it was a matter of fact and there was no chance for dispute.
Judith looked up at him. He was looking straight ahead, so she could only see the side of his face. Even from that viewpoint, he was still incredibly handsome.
Handsome and kind.
“You flatter me, Your Grace,” she murmured.
He did not miss a beat. “Every word I say is true.”
Again, it was said so simply, she found herself believing him. Her face grew red, as the butterflies in her belly fluttered even harder.
“Thank you,” she answered, her voice soft.
He looked at her then, gracing her with a smile. His response was a nod, then he was looking away again.
“You miss her.”
It was more of a statement than a question. Still, she answered.
“Yes, very much.”
“When is she set to return?”
“This year’s end. She is to be married by Christmas.”
“Then you shall not have to wait much longer.”
Judith shook her head. “Indeed, I shall not.”
It had been a summer and half since she last saw Theresa. By the time her sister finally returned home, it would be two summers.
Judith imagined much would have changed. She hoped it was all for the better.
When Theresa told her tales of overseas, she would have her own story to tell as well. Of her time here in Dunham, with the strangest man she had ever met.
The man who first touched her heart.
“Is she the only sibling you have?” he asked after a moment’s pause.
She was quick to answer. “No. I also have a brother, Edward. He is the firstborn. He is married. His wife was heavy with child before I left. She must have delivered by now. I wonder if she truly had a boy … the midwives were almost certain, you see.”
Judith realized then that she had only just thought of that. Of course, Rachel would have given birth to her child. If only she had made it safely to Aunt Tia’s, she would have received word.
As though the duke could read her thoughts, in that moment, he said, “I am certain we shall receive word from them soon, do not worry.”
The words were few, yet so reassuring that they comforted her.
“Yes, I believe so.”
“Edward is quite the scholar,” she continued, choosing not to be dampened by sad thoughts. “He is very intelligent, well read, and well-travelled. He is also an author. All his books have been received with huge success. You see, I come from a family of highly talented individuals.”
She paused and exhaled deeply. “I wish I, too, had something to boast of. Alas, I have nothing. It is why I had to leave home, you understand? I thought being somewhere else, going on an adventure, would help me discover whatever hidden gifts I may possess or, at the very least, fill my life with stories to tell my children.”
She shook her head. “Father would not have me leave, but I insisted. Eventually, able to deny me little, he gave his blessings. They were sad to see me go, all of them. I know they must be concerned, wondering how I am faring. They must blame themselves for letting me go. I wish they would not.”
She knew that, despite the letter she had written to them, assuring them that she was well, her parents would not cease to worry. She imagined her father must have suffered regrets, wishing that he had not let her go.
And her mother … she would be overcome by fears. Fear for her child—and all that might befall her.
Judith wished there were a way to show them she was indeed in safe hands. That she was happy and hale.
As though the duke could sense her troubled thoughts, he gently took her hand. His hold was soft, yet firm.
The touch made every part of her tingle. She fought the trembling as shivers ran down her spine, not wanting to give herself away.
She struggled not to but remained drawn to him, and found herself searching for his gaze.
He was already looking down at her, and her eyes locked easily onto his.
“Of course, you do. You would only blame yourself.”
“Because it is my fault. All of this; I caused it. If only I had listened, paid heed. We should not be here.”
He stopped and turned to fully face her. She, too, halted.
His other hand reached for her face, cupping her cheek tenderly.
It was such an affectionate gesture that she felt something pull at her heart as warmth suffused her.
Her eyes fluttered closed, and, before she could help herself, she leaned into his palm, accepting the sweet comfort he offered.
“Exactly, my lady, you would not be here. Indeed, the circumstances that brought you to my home in the middle of a storm seemed at first unfortunate. Yes, while you could have done many things better, made different decisions, I cannot deny that there is a part of me that feels your arrival was meant to be. I believe you were meant to get lost, so you would find … Dunham.”
“But Mr. Giraud…?”
“Of course, he should not have died,” he finished for her.
“Still, I would not have you blame yourself. You could not have known. If you had, you would not have come on this journey. But you did, and here you are. Amidst all that darkness, I daresay, we found light.”
He would never know how
much his words meant to her, or his touch.
Yes, a part of her would always blame herself for Mr. Giraud’s death. Still, like the duke, she could not deny she was glad she had chanced upon Dunham. She only wished Mr. Giraud were still alive.
She released a heavy breath as she let his words wash over her. Forcing a smile, she said, “Indeed. We both agree that the sky does shine particularly brightly tonight.”
His lips curved, stretching into a warm smile, while hers grew wider.
“That it does.”
There was a sweet moment of silence. As it lasted, he withdrew his hands.
Judith mourned the loss, immediately missing his touch.
Looking around, he said. “Now that you mention it, it is starting to get cold. I say we return indoors before you catch a chill. I would not have you taking ill on my watch.”
So protective.
He was like the princes she had read about in fairytales.
“I have thicker skin than it appears, Your Grace.”
His response was a soft chuckle, which washed over her like a light caress.
“I have no argument. Perhaps it is I who am afraid to catch a chill.”
The teasing in his voice was evident and it thrilled her no end.
“In that case, we must hurry inside, so you can be safe and warm. God forbid you take ill on my watch.”
They turned around then, their faces still sporting smiles.
The walk back into the house was quiet and perfectly so.
As Judith enjoyed the companionable silence, she thought of Amy’s warning.
She had tripped, oh yes, she had.
Her fall now was free. Hopeless.
Yet, she could not find it in her to care.
Chapter 21
A few uneventful days passed at Dunham.
That soon changed one morning, when, after dressing for the day, Judith and Amy found their way to the dining hall for breakfast.
As they entered, they found Mr. Beauregard and the duke speaking in hushed tones.
Upon their appearance, Mr. Beauregard stepped away from his master, proceeding to greet them.
“I bid you good day, my lady,” he said with a bow. He nodded at Amy as he rose. “Miss Mitchell.”
He returned his gaze to Judith. “It is an especially lovely morning, don’t you think? Such fine weather.”
He was his usual self, and Judith and Amy responded just as warmly.
Yet, she could not shake off the feeling that something was going on. Perhaps, it had to do with the letters the duke held in his hands?
“Your Grace,” she greeted, sinking into a curtsy.
“Lady Judith,” he responded. There was a smile on his face. He seemed to always have had a smile for her in these days past, but this time it seemed different.
“You look especially lovely this morning. I believe you are well rested.”
She nodded. “Very much so. My sleep was peaceful.”
“Ah … wonderful. Miss Mitchell, I trust you slept well also?”
“Always, Your Grace, thank you.”
Amy went to take her seat, while the duke pulled Judith’s chair out for her.
She thanked him as she sat, unable to take her eyes off the letters in his hands.
His smile remained wide as he settled into his own chair.
“Is there a special celebration today?” she asked. She could not keep it in any longer.
The duke turned to her, with his brows raised questioningly. “Hm?”
“It’s only … you seem very pleased, Your Grace. I was simply wondering if this is a special day. Has something happened?”
Her eyes fluttered to the letters again and, this time, he caught them straying.
She smiled shyly when he looked back at her.
“Well, I was hoping to break the news to you after breakfast, but it is hardly fair to have you wait another moment, when you’ve waited all this while.”
He paused for a moment before continuing. “Word came today for you and Miss Mitchell, my lady. Three letters. I presume they are from your families.”
Judith’s heart leapt in her chest. She hurriedly took the letters from the duke, who held them out to her.
She recognized the two seals: One belonged to her family and the other to Aunt Tia’s.
“Amy, I believe this one is for you.”
Just as Judith had, her maid eagerly took the letter in her hands. Wasting no time, she began to read.
Judith returned her attention to the letters in hand. Her heart thumped in her chest as she broke the first seal, opening her parents’ letter.
Dear Judith,
Oh, darling. We were both sad and happy to receive news from you.
Happy because when we saw how dangerous the weather had become, we worried endlessly for your safety. We feared the worst, even as we prayed for the best.
So yes, we were glad to know that you had survived and had found shelter where you can keep warm and safe.
Nonetheless, we were overtaken with grief to hear of Mr. Giraud’s demise. His family has received his body and he has been given a proper burial.
His wife sends her gratitude and says that you have her forgiveness.
It is a terrible thing, what happened. Rather unfortunate. My heart goes out to his family. I cannot but feel a sense of duty towards them.
For this reason, I have decided that they shall be my responsibility as long as I live, and beyond.
I have made arrangements to ensure they never want or need for anything for the rest of their lives.
Knowing the kind heart you have, I hope this gives you peace and you cease to hold yourself ransom to guilt.
My dear, I do hope you are safe still and well. Your mother and I would come to you in a heartbeat if we could, but the roads remain treacherous.
I pray you take great care not to continue the journey until the storm is well passed and the paths are safe to travel.
How is Amy? I hope you are taking great care of each other. Stay together and keep your strength.
The Duke of Sawbrook has our utmost gratitude for his generous hospitality. Please let him know that we are in his debt.
Your mother and I have never stopped praying for you. Edward and Rachel also send their love. Heavens be praised, they have been blessed with a son; Nathaniel Edmund Brewen.
He is the most beautiful child ever, and we cannot wait for you to meet him.
With all our hearts, we love you and await your safe return.
Your Father,
Robert Brewen.
Tears filled Judith’s heart as she finished reading those words. She had never known that reading a letter could fill her with such a myriad of emotions.
She only realized then how much she had truly missed home.
As she read those words, she heard her father’s voice echoing in her head. She saw him in her mind’s eye, head bent over as he scribbled, quill in hand. She saw her mother standing beside him, her hand over her heart, eyes wet with tears and love for her dearest daughter.
And Edward … Oh, she now had a nephew! Her brother had become a father—and she was now Aunt Judith!
To finally hear from them brought her so great a joy.
She longed to be home again, if only to show herself to them, be held in loving embrace, and give her assurances that she was well and safe.
One tear broke free, then another, and another.
The duke was quick to offer her a handkerchief. Gratefully, she took it and dried her face.
A moment later, she was able to stop the tears. That was when she broke the second seal.
Dearest Judith,
It was not long after I received word from your mother about your visit that your letter arrived. Unfortunately, I have not been in my home in Yorkshire.
I have been visiting my husband’s other estate in Sawbrook, Earlshire, to be specific. His mother used to live there, and I happen to love the quaint manor. Quite charming, I must say.