“I don’t want to get used to them!” he said angrily, turning round to look at her. “You know how I feel about all Valtegans, Carrie. In the God’s name, they tortured your twin to death— and nearly killed you! Have you forgotten so quickly why our Link formed?” His torc began to vibrate gently, warningly, against his neck. Too angry to wonder why, he eased it away from his throat with one hand.
“Of course I haven’t,” she said, sitting down on the sofa beside him. She put her hand on his knee but he pushed it away.
“I won’t have a Valtegan on my estate. You’d no right to make that decision without consulting me!”
“I knew what you’d say and thought…”
“Thought what I felt didn’t matter,” he said, releasing his torc before getting up and moving away from her. “They set my teeth on edge, Carrie. I don’t like them near me. Get on the comm and cancel it now.”
“I can’t, not with your father coming too,” she said quietly. “It’ll look like an official snub.”
“And entertaining him will look like I’m endorsing their presence here and on Shola! You should have thought this through properly— spoken to me!— before arranging this. Call my father, get him to find you a way out of this.”
“I think you’re getting things out of proportion, Kusac,” she said. “The Primes are totally different from the Valtegans. Yes, all three of us suffered because of Chy’qui’s experiments, but he’s dead, it’s over, and most importantly you’ve got your Talent back.”
“Have I?” He swung round angrily on her, feeling a jolt of pain surge down his spine. He gasped, grabbing hold of the chair back beside him for support, but the pain was short-lived.
“What is it?” asked Kaid, instantly on his feet in concern. “I felt that!”
“It’s nothing. Leave me be,” he said, waving him away. “I have a form of empathy, but that’s all. I can’t communicate with you or anyone! Their treatment wasn’t as effective as they said. I can’t forget or forgive what happened to me on the Prime ship, and they were directly responsible for it. How could they claim we were supposed to be guests and yet hold us captive the way they did? There’s no way the Sholan Forces would have allowed Chy’qui the kind of access he had to us for his experiments! They failed to protect us. I won’t have him here, Carrie!”
“That pain should be gone,” said Kaid. “If you’ve got it back then something’s wrong. You need to see Kzizysus.”
“No, I’ve had enough of doctors to last a lifetime!” Then he stopped. “I’ll see him if you cancel this on the grounds I’m ill.”
“No,” said Kaid before Carrie could speak. “If you want to gamble with your health, then do so, it’s your right, but the visit goes ahead as planned. Primes on Shola are a fact of life now, Kusac. You have to learn to live with it, we all have to.”
“Then I won’t be here,” he snarled, stalking out of the den into the garden. “Nor will my daughter!”
*
“Kusac!” Carrie called out after him.
“Let him walk off his anger, Carrie,” said Kaid, calling Banner on his wrist comm.
“I see him,” said Banner’s distant voice.
“How’s he been at Stronghold?”
“Patchy. He seemed to settle in, went for a picnic with Father Lijou and his mate, and came back to start specialized training with them. He’s gotten increasingly short-tempered over the last few days, though. If I’d have to guess, I’d say it isn’t working out as easily as he’d thought it would.”
“Any of the pain attacks?”
“Not that I know of. You said they were over.”
“We thought they were. He just had a minor one.”
“I’ll watch for them now. He’s on his way to the village from the look of it. Gotta go.”
The link went dead.
“What do we do?” asked Carrie. “I didn’t think he’d react this badly. I really thought that with him getting back his Talent, he’d be more willing to let the past go. Only it doesn’t seem to be working out like that,” she sighed, leaning forward slightly to ease her back.
“I did say I thought it was a little too soon,” he said, going over to her and starting to rub her lower back gently. “If he doesn’t go to see Kzizysus, then I’ll haul him bodily there myself. I want to know what’s happening even if he doesn’t. As for tomorrow, leave it as it is but talk to Konis and Rhyasha. Kusac can stay away if he wishes, but I have a feeling Kashini won’t want to, and if she’s where Zsurtul is, take my word for it, he’ll be there.” He stopped, leaning over her shoulder slightly. “I hate to say this, but I don’t remember you being this large last time, Carrie.”
“Don’t start! I’m not going through an accelerated pregnancy this time, Kaid! I’m fine. Second cubs are often bigger.”
the Couana, Zhal-S’Asha, 22nd day (October)
“I know you went to the Cabbarrans’ vehicle,” said Banner. “What did they say?”
“Not a lot,” said Kusac, shifting his position on the hard mess seat. He picked up his coffee. “Only that nothing was wrong, that it was just taking me longer than they thought to come to terms with the past.” He remembered the visit now; there had been a surreal quality to it that even its memory evoked. He let it play through in his mind, saying nothing to Banner this time.
Valsgarth Estate, Zhal-Nylam, 14th day (September)
Surrounded by crates, Naacha was waiting for him just inside the air lock of their shuttle. He reared up on his haunches, folding his short forelimbs across his chest. Sunlight coming through the entrance fell on him, turning the swirling blue tattoos on the alien’s face almost luminous.
He stopped, eyeing the Cabbaran warily, his anger suddenly dissipated. A vague, half-remembered memory of Naacha warned him to tread carefully.
“The pain came back,” he said in answer to the question he knew the other was asking. “I thought I was healed.”
Rapid quadrupedal footsteps sounded from inside and Annuur appeared, nosing his way past Naacha. “What matter, Kusac? Why here?” he asked, sitting down.
“I told him. Why doesn’t he answer me?” he said, unable to look away from the swirling tattoos. He could swear they were actually moving.
“Naacha talk rarely,” said Annuur, glancing obliquely at his crewmate. “Very spiritual, like your priests.”
He was aware of what Annuur said, but his whole attention was focused on the patterns as they began to grow larger, gradually filling not only his field of view, but his mind as well.
“Not here, Naacha! Too visible he be here!” he heard Annuur say as if from a great distance. “Bring him inside! Sokarr, Lweeu, get crates moved immediately!”
*
“Must keep calm as possible while your system adjusts, so collar still warns when not. Is temporary,” Annuur was saying.
He nodded his head, then blinked, slightly surprised to find himself sitting with Annuur on a pile of deep cushions in the Cabarrans’ lounge.
“No reason for pain, must be psychological. Anticipating it, you feel it. Again remedy with you.”
“Makes sense,” he heard himself say.
“Take another drink, Kusac. Still are swaying a little. Sun very strong today. Lucky we got you in here before you passed out.”
He’d passed out? Confused, he finished the drink he found in his hand, suddenly anxious to leave.
“When your system settles, then nightmares stop. Bits of memories will become memories you can look at and understand. Then you let go of them. When this done, Talent return. Is as we said before. Nothing changed.”
“Thank you, Annuur,” he said, looking around for a place to put the glass.
Annuur reached out his broad four-fingered hand and took it from him. “You find own way out? Too hot for me today in corridors.”
“Yes, of course.” He remembered the blue-tattooed Cabbarran. “Where’s Naacha?”
“Naacha working in lab, that why he first to hear you arrive.”
He nodded, and t
ook his leave, hesitating before stepping out onto the landing pad. There was something not quite right, something he was missing, but he was damned if he knew what it was. Shaking his head, he went down the ramp.
the Couana, Zhal-S’Asha, 22nd day (October)
“What changed your mind about Prince Zsurtul?”
“Kashini. She refused to come with me to Vanna’s. There was no way I was leaving my daughter alone.”
“She had her mother and Kaid,” said Banner reasonably.
“You’ve never shared a cub, have you?” he said with a smile. “She’s my flesh and blood.”
His mind, however, was still on that visit to Annuur— or was it Naacha? He was the spiritual one of the four, Like your priests, the Cabbarran had said. Their priests were all telepaths. Was that why Naacha’s tattoos had fascinated him? Were they designed to make the viewer susceptible to mental manipulation? Was that why he’d passed out? And the way all his memories had suddenly started to fuse together was another mystery. Was it waiting for Carrie’s and Kaid’s daughter to be born that had caused it?
They’d certainly started returning at a convenient time, just before setting out on a mission where he’d need his Talents, and when everyone still believed he had none. More questions, and not one answer.
Valsgarth Estate, Zhal-Nylam, 14th day (September)
“No. ‘Shini stay,” she said firmly, reinforcing it mentally.
“We’re going to Aunt Vanna’s. You’ll have Marak to play with,” he said, tugging on her hand.
“No. Stay.”
He bent down to pick her up.
“No! Stay!” she shrieked, anchoring the claws on her toes into the carpet and going limp in his grasp.
“What’re you feeding her these days, Carrie?” he asked, bending down to unlatch her feet and scoop her up into his arms. “She weighs a ton.”
“She doesn’t want to go,” said Carrie calmly, leaning on the end of the cot watching him.
“Stay! Not go Aunt Vanna’s! Stay party!” she screeched, her body galvanizing into life as she began to squirm and kick.
“Stop it, Kashini,” he said firmly, turning her around so she was kicking thin air. “We’re going and that’s that.”
The shrieks became louder, peal after peal of them till he flattened his ears to his skull trying to close out the noise. She brought her feet up, scrabbling and clawing with them and her hands at his arms. Then she started sending the screams mentally.
The noise brought Kaid out of his room to see what was going on.
Grim-faced, he left the nursery and began walking along the corridor. He got halfway to the stairs before she bit him.
His yowl of rage could be heard as far as her shrieks. Taking advantage of the moment, she slipped from his grasp, hitting the floor running. She didn’t stop till she’d reached her mother and was hiding behind her.
Sucking his bitten forearm, he glowered at Carrie. “You put her up to this, didn’t you?”
“Me? No. I wouldn’t do that, Kusac, no matter how much I disagreed with you,” she said, trying not to wince as Kashini’s needle-sharp little claws dug into her leg. “Kashini is just as strong-willed as you, and as able to make up her own mind.”
He stared at her peeping round at him from behind Carrie’s leg, an anxious expression on her small face.
” ‘Shini want stay,” she said, regarding him with enormous damp eyes, her bottom lip trembling.
Beaten, he sighed and examined his arm. It had only been a token bite, but her teeth had broken the skin. He glowered over at Kaid who was trying extremely hard not to grin.
Carrie bent down and picked her up. “You bit Daddy,” she said sternly, looking her in the eyes. “That hurt him and was very naughty. You’ll apologize at once, then you’ll go quietly with Daddy to Aunt Vanna’s.” She put her down again and gave her a gentle push toward him.
Kashini resisted, looking at her mother before looking up at him. “Want stay,” she whimpered, ears flattened and tears filling the amber eyes as she pulled at the bow on her tabard belt. Her small tail hung dejectedly to the ground. She hiccuped.
“All right,” he sighed, bending down and cuffing her lightly on the side of the head. “We’ll stay, but don’t you ever bite me again, or next time you’ll be a sorry cub!”
” ‘ank you Da-Da!” she said, flinging herself at him and scrambling up his leg and chest to hug him. “Sorry hurt Da-Da. Not do ‘gain.”
“You’d better get changed, then,” said Carrie, turning back to the nursery. “If you come in here first, I’ll put some antiseptic on that bite.”
He could hear the laughter in her voice and decided to ignore it and keep what little shreds of dignity he had left.
the Couana, Zhal-S’Asha, 22nd day (October)
Banner didn’t bother hiding his amusement. When he’d stopped laughing, he said, “I’m sorry I missed all this! Go on. What happened next?”
“You know, you were there at the parking area along with all the others,” he said.
“But I only know it from my perspective. I want to know what went on behind the scenes.”
“Getting to be quite the voyeur, aren’t you?” he said, lifting an eye ridge humorously.
Valsgarth Estate, evening, Zhal-Nylam, 14th day (September)
He stood beside Carrie, holding Kashini’s hand, watching Prince Zsurtul’s aircar approach. As it drew closer, he could see it was the Prince’s own aircar, the exterior resplendent in the blues, reds, and golds of the Prime royal family. On its side it bore the emblem Zsurtul wore tattooed on his chest— an open eggshell hatching a fire of light, the symbol of the Enlightened One.
Already his hair had risen to the point where his ears were almost invisible. It framed his face like a U’Churian mane, cascading down his shoulders and back for several inches. He resented Zsurtul’s presence, and was still angry with Carrie for forcing this onto him.
Like Kaid, he’d put on his black Brotherhood tunic, his belt knife prominent since, this being a peaceful visit, he couldn’t justify wearing his gun.
As the vehicle hovered prior to landing, Carrie moved closer to him.
“Look, I’m sorry, Kusac,” she said, leaning against him and stroking his cheek. “I really did think this would be for the best. The Prince is only a youngling, probably about Kitra’s age in our terms. What possible threat can he be to you or any of us?”
Her scent, mingled with Sashti’s oils, filled his nostrils and he found himself leaning into her caress as he put his free arm round her. He understood the very real concern for him that had prompted her to arrange this visit. Maybe she was right. What threat could Zsurtul pose to them, one youth alone among so many of his Clan?
“He’ll be Emperor one day.”
“And how we treat him here today will affect his attitude to us in the future. Even more reason for him to visit us, and you to welcome him with at least a semblance of goodwill.”
“I’ll do it this time, but this is a one-time event. Don’t put me in this position again, Carrie.”
She said nothing, content just to rest her head on his shoulder, and he to let her, knowing that this time he was there to protect her and his daughter. Gradually, his hair and pelt began to settle around his shoulders.
The engines changed pitch and he turned back to watch the vehicle drop gently to the ground.
“Shall I greet him for us?” asked Kaid.
He nodded briefly, grateful to his friend for sparing him that duty, suddenly aware of the crowd of Sholans and their alien friends that was gathering to watch at a respectful distance. He felt torn in two directions as one part of his mind asked him what was one alien more among so many, while the other, more primitive part attempted to flex his claws.
The door opened and Zsurtul stepped out, resplendent in his court finery. It shocked him, making Zsurtul appear at once more alien, yet less like any Valtegan or Prime he’d ever seen.
“Think of Kitra, dressing up to impress Dz
aka in their early days,” whispered Carrie as Kaid moved forward to greet him.
the Couana, Zhal-S’Asha, 22nd day (October)
“But the meal itself went well, didn’t it?”
“As far as Zsurtul was concerned,” he agreed. “Though I did leave them to it as soon as Kashini started to get sleepy.”
“Is meeting with Kezule going to be a problem?” Banner asked after a short pause. “I knew the visit annoyed you because the next morning you left without warning for Stronghold.”
“Not for me,” he said, picking up his mug.
“How long till the briefing?” asked Banner, changing the topic.
He checked his wrist comm. “We leave jump in about six hours. With another half day to slow down to reach the rendezvous point, I’m scheduling the briefing for fifteen hours from now.”
“Cutting it fine, aren’t you?”
“I don’t think so. Leaves us two hours for final preparations.”
“You’re the Captain,” said Banner, getting up.
Stronghold, Zhal-Nylam, 15th day (September)
“Lijou, Kusac’s on his way back to you and he won’t reply to my calls. I got up this morning and he’d gone!”
“Calm down, Carrie,” said Lijou soothingly, seeing her red, swollen eyes and damp face. “Tell me what happened from the start.”
“I invited Zsurtul over for a meal yesterday and we fell out over it, but I thought he’d gotten over it. He says he feels threatened by him, insists on calling him a Valtegan. I thought having Zsurtul over would help since when we went to him for a meal, it seemed to go well. But it didn’t and now he’s gone and he won’t talk to me! And Banner’s not with him.” Tears welled up again and she scrubbed her hand over her face in a determined effort to stop them.
“Is Kaid there? What does he say?” asked Lijou, knowing Carrie was too distressed to give an objective view of what had happened.
“Yes, he’s here, but Kusac’s switched off his wrist comm and the aircar comm!”
“In that case, I’m afraid you’ll have to wait till he gets here, my dear. I’ll talk to him when he arrives and call you back. Meanwhile, can I speak to Kaid?”
Kaid’s face replaced hers and Lijou instantly revised his opinion of a storm over nothing.
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