There was no answer. Maeve called through door, “Aunt Aislin, may I come in?”
A few moments passed, and then she heard her aunt say in a weary voice, “I really don’t feel like visiting today. I’m sorry.”
“Go in! Just open the door!” encouraged Gwen in a whisper.
“She hates it when we just walk in!” Maeve whispered urgently, giving her mother a look over her shoulder. “I think this is mean!”
“She’ll be fine. It’s not mean. She won’t be mad at you. Just open the door!”
Shaking her head, Maeve turned the doorknob, and the door swung open.
The room was rather dark, but Maeve knew the apartment very well. She made her way back to Aislin’s bedroom and found her lying on her side on the bed, facing away from her.
Maeve put the trencher down on the night table and crawled onto the bed. She put a gentle hand on Aislin’s shoulder and peered over into her face.
“You shouldn’t have come, sweetie. I don’t feel like talking,” Aislin said.
“You don’t have to talk to me, but everyone is very worried that you’re not eating. I brought breakfast for you. Please sit up with me and try to eat something.”
Aislin rolled over to face the girl, and Maeve fought the urge to run. Her aunt was gray and gaunt. Her amber eyes were enormous and haunted in her thin face.
Maeve swallowed her fear and said, “Please. It’s just some eggs. Won’t you try to eat something?”
“I can’t, Maeve. I just can’t...”
“Don’t you love me anymore?”
“Of course I love you. I’m just very tired.”
“How can you be tired? All you do is sleep!”
Aislin groaned. “I’ll eat a little, but then I want you to go tell Roderic, your mother and Devin to leave me alone!”
The girl bounced off the bed as Aislin sat up. She handed the trencher of eggs to her aunt.
“Colven gave me my own Cribbetts board, and I want to teach you how to play. I don’t have anyone to play with here,” Maeve said hopefully.
Aislin winced. “I don’t feel like playing games. I just want to sleep.”
“It’s time for you to get up. We miss you downstairs.”
“I find that hard to believe.”
“Well, I miss you. There’s no one like you, no one in the whole wide world. I love doing things with you. Grandmother makes me sew every day, and I hate it. I don’t want to sew,” Maeve said in a great rush of words. “And they found my foal and brought her back to the stable, but no one will let me go and see her. Mother is afraid that there are still bad soldiers lurking around. I know you would take me to the stable. Please, Aunt Aislin, I miss you so much.”
Aislin paused, a small forkful of eggs halfway up to her mouth, and looked at Maeve. After a moment, she put the fork back down on the trencher and placed a warm hand on the girl’s cheek.
“I’ll tell you what,” Aislin said. “Come back tomorrow and bring your Cribbetts board. I’ll play with you if you want.”
“I’ll be here! I love you!” Maeve quickly kissed Aislin on the cheek and was gone.
Maeve’s parting ‘I love you’ echoed through Aislin’s mind for hours.
Damn them for putting her up to this, she thought, gritting her teeth. They knew very well she wouldn’t throw Maeve out. She sat in the half-light on the edge of her bed, contemplating the dirty trick they had just pulled on her. She wanted to die, but she had to live for Maeve.
Aislin flopped back down onto the pillow with a sigh.
Well played, my friends. Well played.
Slowly, Aislin came back to life, though she still avoided most of her family. Maeve was happy to take food to her, and they played Cribbetts for hours on end. After awhile, she began to accept food and conversation from Gwen. Aislin’s appetite had come back as well, though lately the food seemed to be making her very sick.
Chapter Forty One
EVEN WITH THE BLANKET WRAPPED double around her, Aislin couldn’t stop shivering. Lying on the floor, knees drawn up under the cover, she felt the nausea kick up a notch. It wouldn’t be long now.
And then she was on her knees in front of the chamber pot, retching, straining, delivering the last remnants of her breakfast into it.
She sat back a little, closed her eyes, and draped her forearms over the chamber pot, laying her head on her upper arms. She could feel a fine sheen of sweat breaking out all over her face.
She heard the door to her apartment open and close, just as her roiling stomach forced her over the chamber pot once again.
Laying her head back down on her arms, Aislin heard footsteps heading in her direction. A soft hand touched her between her shoulder blades as she hugged the chamber pot.
“Are you all right?”
No, Gwen, I’m not all right. In fact, I don’t think I’ll ever be all right again. Why do you ask?
“Doesn’t anyone ever knock around here?”
“I did knock. Three times. And I called to you, but you didn’t answer. Are you sick?” Gwen asked.
Aislin groaned. Do you see me on my knees here?
“Did you eat something that didn’t agree with you?”
Aislin weakly shook her head no.
“Do you want me to get Roderic? He has some good remedies for the stomach...”
“Roderic doesn’t have anything that would help me,” Aislin said flatly. “I’ve been sick every morning for the past month and a half.”
“Why didn’t you tell some...?”
Gwen stopped talking abruptly, and Aislin could tell by the tense silence that she got the message.
Gwen gripped her by the shoulders, a surprisingly strong grip, and pulled Aislin up to face her. Aislin held her gaze for a second, then curled in on herself and slumped into her sister-in-law’s lap.
“Aislin, are you...with child?”
With a pitiful whimper, Aislin nodded her head.
Gwen exhaled sharply and tightened her arms around her. “And the baby is Tristan’s?”
“Of course it’s Tristan’s! You can’t tell anyone! Swear to me you won’t say a word!”
“You aren’t going to be able to keep this a secret for very long. This baby will be in the line of succession for the throne of Arianrhod. At the very least, you must let Tristan know he’s going to be a father!”
“I don’t want him to know. He doesn’t deserve to know!”
“But...”
“Please...I don’t want anyone to know. Not yet. Just let me think about it for awhile.”
Gwen sighed. “We all love you. No one is going to be harsh with you. Not after everything you’ve gone through. Clean up a bit, and I’ll take you downstairs. I bet they’ll be more understanding than you think.”
Aislin shook her head vigorously in Gwen’s lap, making soft noises of displeasure.
“They have to know about this baby,” Gwen said firmly. “You know that as well as I do!”
“This baby will be half elf! How is he...or she...ever going to be able to take its place in the succession here? You saw my mother’s reaction to Tristan. What is she going to say when she hears about this baby?”
“I don’t have the answers, but I won’t let you go through this alone. I’ll stand with you,” Gwen said, as she helped Aislin to her feet.
Navigating the stairs with a hand covering her mouth and Gwen supporting her, Aislin ran down a list of things she might say to those gathered in the dining hall. All of them sounded silly and damning.
Guess what? I’m having a baby elf!
Despite the temptation to laugh hysterically, this was nothing short of a disaster. Royal daughters didn’t get pregnant out of wedlock, and certainly not to mythical fairy tale creatures that didn’t exi
st. She was sure someone was going to tie her to a horse and send the damn thing in the direction of Morrigan.
She hadn’t even thought about it the few times she and Tristan had made love in Oakenbourne. He was very much like a human man in all the ways that counted, but she hadn’t seriously considered that he could ever... that she would ever...
By the time they got to the dining hall, Gwen was trying to support Aislin on legs that refused to hold her upright. Unable to let go of her to open the door, Gwen kicked at it with a sandaled foot.
“Rod, let us in!” Gwen called.
Roderic opened the door, looking amused. Aislin lifted her eyes to his, hoping she didn’t look as fragile as she felt. His smile evaporated immediately.
Roderic reached out to help Gwen support her. “Aislin? What’s wrong? You look sick.”
“She is sick,” Gwen said, glancing sideways at her. They helped her through the door, and everyone turned. Aislin covered her face with her hands.
“Aislin?” Devin got to his feet and came to stand beside her. “What is it?”
Aislin pivoted in Gwen’s arms and hid her face on her shoulder. She couldn’t think of a single thing to say. Careful, dependable, responsible Aislin had thrown caution to the wind just one time in her life, and the cosmos had delivered a stinging rebuke right back.
Gwen sighed and held her close. ”Aislin is going to have a baby.”
A loud gasp filled the room, and Aislin heard Devin say in her ear, “Bless your sweet little heart.”
“How could you have ...?” Emara asked, looking up from her breakfast. It didn’t take her long to figure it out. Her face twisted in revulsion. “Don’t tell me you bedded down with that elf you brought here?”
Aislin choked and sobbed at the same time.
“Emara, please be quiet! Can’t you see you’re upsetting her!” Devin snapped.
“How dare you talk to me like that? A common courier...!”
“Then let me say it, grandmother: would you please do us all a favor and be quiet!” Bryce said crossly. “Aislin has sacrificed more than we can ever know for this kingdom. She nearly died fighting for all of us, and she deserves our thanks and respect. I will not listen to you talk to her in such a detestable manner!”
Emara looked stunned, dazed, that her own grandson would speak that way to her.
Roderic bent his head to hers and said softly, “The baby is Tristan’s?”
Aislin nodded.
“Does he know?”
“No. And I don’t want him to know. I forbid you to tell him.”
“This is not something you can keep from him.” Roderic said gently.
She jerked her head up to look at him. “Yes. I can.”
“This baby will be in line for Arianrhod’s throne, and Tristan is the chieftain of his people,” said Bryce. “Your baby will also be important to them. He must be told he’s going to be a father.”
Aislin frantically tried to deny it, but she couldn’t argue with the wisdom of his words. The royal succession in any land was carefully documented to avoid conflict, and this baby would be an heir in two of them. It couldn’t be kept a secret from Tristan, no matter how badly she wanted to exclude him. She would not...could not...deny her child its heritage.
Bryce, a thoughtful look on his young face, nodded at Roderic and said, “Take Devin with you and see if you can find Tristan. Devin told me that the Sylvan usually capture humans as soon as they set foot in Blackthorne Forest, so it shouldn’t be too difficult. Tell him, as the future King of Arianrhod, that I respectfully ask that he present himself to me. I think we can find a way to fix this.”
“What!” Tristan shouted.
“She’s with child. About four months, by my calculation,” said Roderic. “Aislin has indicated that the child is yours. Is this true?”
“Yes, it’s true. It must be true.” Shaking uncontrollably, Tristan sank like a stone into one of the soft chairs in Colven’s room.
“Very well. Prince Bryce thought you had a right to know,” said Roderic.
I’m going to be the father... Tristan dropped his face into his hands. ...of a half-human child.
“Do you love her?” asked Devin. The sharp tone in Devin’s voice made Tristan feel like he was answering to her father.
“Of course, I do. More than you know. There just doesn’t seem to be a way forward for us.”
“There is always a way forward, Tristan. There is no doubt that it will be difficult for both of you, but it would be a travesty to let your child grow up without knowing its father or its people. Is that what you want?” asked Colven.
“Of course not!” Tristan was up and pacing around the room, running both hands through his hair. “You know what happened with Duff. She’s not safe here! And I’m not wanted there. This is never going to work!”
“You descend from an exalted and unbroken line of chieftains beginning with Verschal the Traveler. If this baby is a boy, he will be the next chieftain of the Sylvan. This is not something you can take lightly,” Colven said.
“Take lightly? Do you think I am taking this lightly? A human woman is carrying my child, Colven. The baby will be half elf, half human. Have you thought about that? If the baby is a boy, will he even be able to take his place as chieftain of the Sylvan? You know as well as I do what everyone is going to say!” Tristan stammered. “I won’t subject Aislin to that.”
“The Sacred Scrolls say only that it must be a male child directly conceived from the loins of the current chieftain. There is nothing that says the boy must be a full-blooded elf,” replied Colven.
Tristan laughed uproariously at this, and only stopped when he saw Colven’s scowl. “I appreciate what you’re trying to do, Colven, but you know better than that. Council will burn Oakenbourne to the ground before they will let a half-human man sit as chieftain.”
Colven was generally imperturbable. He was slow to anger, if he angered at all. Given this, Tristan was shocked when the old elf grabbed him by the arm and spun him around, his eyes as sharp as the blades of a dagger.
“Maybe you should have thought about that before you convinced her to lay with you, eh? If you’ll remember, I wanted you to let the princess go with her courier, but you fought to keep her. You were completely enamored of her; there was no reasoning with you. And now that she’s with child, I hear you say ‘it’s never going to work’!” Colven was red-faced, shouting up at Tristan. “You broke every protocol we had to keep her at Oakenbourne with you. You were prepared to forfeit your own life to heal her. What has changed? By the blood of your father, Tristan, I will not let you abandon her or this child. She’s a dear, sweet thing, and you have a responsibility to her. I will go to Arianrhod and bring her here myself if I have to!”
If you love her, find a way to make it work. Starr’s voice echoed in Tristan’s head. He dropped back into the chair, forcing the heels of his hands into his eyes.
“I will never love anyone more than I love that woman,” Tristan said, trying and failing to keep the emotion from his voice. “But I am so damned afraid. For her. For me. For the child.”
“I wouldn’t think much of you if you weren’t afraid.” Colven’s hands were warm on his shoulders. “But you have your father’s blood in your veins. You have never let your fear keep you from doing what you know is right. To my knowledge, there has never been a human and elf pairing in the entire history of the Sylvan. I know it will be an issue for some, but I find it rather exciting. She is a worthy mate for you, my boy. Go and claim her.”
“Maybe she won’t even want me now,” Tristan said miserably.
Roderic cleared his throat and stepped forward. “Prince Bryce, as the future King of Arianrhod, has respectively requested that you meet with him. He has some proposals I think you’ll find... interesting. If you don
’t mind, we could stay the night here, and you and Colven could accompany us back to Arianrhod.”
“I think that’s a wise idea. You must hear what Prince Bryce has to say. And you must find out what’s in Aislin’s heart,” Colven said.
Chapter Forty Two
“I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M HUNGRY AGAIN,” Aislin muttered to herself. Eating for two was exhausting! If she kept this up, she wouldn’t be able to fit through the door.
Hoping Cook still had a few things left over from lunch, Aislin slipped on her shoes and headed down the stairs to the kitchen.
She was half way down the stone stairs when her mother appeared at the bottom and looked up at her. Aislin lifted her eyes briefly and quickly looked away. She attempted to brush by Emara at the bottom, but her mother reached out and gently grabbed her upper arm.
Startled, Aislin glanced at the well-manicured hand gripping her arm, and then up at her mother. Golden eyes very much like her own searched her face, with a look that was both pleading and hopeful. Haughty arrogance from her mother was the norm. This look...well, this look unnerved Aislin altogether.
There was a vulnerability there, a profound sadness. As she held her mother’s gaze, Aislin saw things moving in her eyes. You don’t know me at all. I am not as I appear. Please let me tell you.
Emara’s voice broke the spell. “Aislin....”
“Mother.” Aislin was shaking from head to toe.
“I know you’re furious with me, but I was hoping to talk to you,” Emara said.
Furious doesn’t even begin to describe it, Mother.
“About what?”
“Not here. May I come up to your rooms?”
Aislin had known it was coming. Emara had been giving her sidelong glances for several days.
Aislin of Arianrhod (Land of Alainnshire) Page 27