Protecting Her: A Romance Bundle

by Mia Ford

  I give Rachel a desperate look, needing her to help me right now. This is unexpected, not where I thought today was headed. Her eyes are wide, bugging out of her head, but she must realize I need her.

  “Okay, well let’s go to a drug store to get a test. There’s no way we can know for sure until you’ve done that, is there?” She links her arm through mine. “No point in worrying just yet.”

  The thing is I don’t know if I’m worried or excited. It’s a shock, but this might be a good thing. Me and Jordan want to start a family, it’s always been a part of our plans. Why not now? There are worse things… I guess that’s the main thing at the moment, the one driving force in my brain. There are always ways things can be worse. I’ve experienced worse, I’ve been into the pit of hell and back, so nothing feels like an issue anymore.

  “Okay yeah. We’ll get a test, then I can know for sure. Let’s go right now.”

  ***

  I stare at the white stick in my hand with confusion, hoping that I’ve done it right.

  “Is there a wrong way to pee on a stick?” I ask Rachel who stands on the other side of the toilet door.

  “I don’t know,” she replies helplessly. “It isn’t something that I’ve ever done before.”

  I sigh loudly. “Oh well, I suppose there’s only one way to find out. I’ll just have to wait and see. A whole freaking minute, honestly, it’s like torture. Will you distract me while I wait? Tell me about your life?”

  “Really? If you’re sure.” I make an agreeable noise, I need something to distract me from this hell. “Okay, well me and Freddie are doing really well. He asked me to move in with him the other day…”

  “He did?” I exclaim in shock. “Oh, my goodness, that’s amazing news. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.”

  “Oh, well we were doing wedding dress shopping for you. I didn’t want to steal your thunder.”

  “You know I’m not like that! I would want to know. So, how did he ask you? Are you moving into his?”

  “Yeah, he’s got this amazing farm house, you’ll love it. You will have to come down to stay soon. It’s been a while since you came to visit…” She suddenly trails off as she remembers why. “Sorry, I…”

  I let out a belly laugh. “Honestly, Rachel, it’s fine. I’m not so traumatized by what happened to me that I can’t think about it or anything. I’d prefer not to because I just want to move on, but it’s okay.”

  I have had a lot of nightmares. When my subconscious comes into play I’m clearly not quite as brave, but no good can come from sharing that information with her. I’m pretty sure that I’m doing okay anyway.

  “Okay, well… I’m sorry for mentioning you not coming. Of course, you haven’t been able to. But you should when you can. I would love to have you, and you really will like Freddie’s place. It’s amazing.”

  “He sounds like a really nice guy.” I smile as I think about how happy he makes my friend. “I’m glad you met him. And work is still going alright? Are you still enjoying teaching?”

  “I’ve been made head of the department, so that’s all going well too. I love it.”

  Once upon a time, hearing that my friend was doing so well while my career is all over the place, I might have felt a bolt of anxiety, but I don’t feel that way now. I’m nothing but happy for her.

  “Oh, well that’s amazing. I’m so pleased. It’s good to hear you doing so well…”

  “That must have been a minute now,” Rachel interjects, seeing right through me. “Stop putting it off.”

  “Yeah, you’re right.” I murmur. I bob my head up and down like an idiot. “Okay, I’ll look.”

  I drag my eyes downwards, fearfully wondering what I’m going to see. I don’t know what answer I want to see the most. I’m not sure how I’ll feel whatever response I see. If I’m not, like carries on as normal, I don’t even need to tell Jordan about it if I don’t want to. I can just continue on with wedding planning. I don’t even need to be upset. I can’t be sad over something that was never mine in the first place. That’s just silliness.

  But if it’s positive, I’ll have that warm, full sensation. It’s going to be scary though, changing everything, starting on with the next stage of my life. Me and Jordan will be about to become parents, we’ll have a family of our own. Even if it’s unexpected, I think Jordan will be pleased. I hope he will be anyway it might be nice.

  “So?” Rachel sounds jittery. “Have you looked yet? What’s the answer?”

  I gasp, staggering backwards until I hit the wall behind me. My brain spins violently, my stomach flip flops, my lungs squeeze tight. “It’s positive,” I gush out. “It’s positive. I’m having a baby.”

  I slump to the ground, my knees giving way while I digest that. I know it’s probably what I wanted but it’s still a shock. That’s why I don’t feel my best because I’m growing a life. My hand automatically wraps protectively around my stomach while I get a swell of love in my chest.

  “That’s good news, isn’t it?” Rachel calls through the door, stunned. “Are you happy?”

  “I am.” A bright smile spreads across my lips. “I really am.”

  “So, what do you want to do now? Do you want to go back home to tell Jordan? He’s going to be excited too, right? Or did you want to go for a walk to get used to the idea first?”

  She doesn’t know how I feel, and to be honest I’m not one hundred percent either. I’m happy, but so stunned. It’s a big life change. It’s going to turn everything on its head. Hopefully for the best way.

  “Let’s go and tell Jordan,” I reply decisively while pushing myself into a standing position. “I can’t wait for him to know.”

  I stagger out of the cubical and rest on my friend. Already she has happy tears streaming down her face because of my news. “Do you remember when you tried to pretend that you and Jordan were just friends? I knew that wouldn’t work out.”

  She makes me laugh, even through my shock. “I forgot all about that. I think I knew even then that he was the one for me.”

  32

  Jordan

  “Oh, you two are back early.” I flicker my eyes between Veronica and Rachel, feeling confused. “Did you find a wedding dress already? That was quick! I was expecting you gone all day. Is everything alright?”

  Rachel and Veronica give each other suspect looks before they move silently into the kitchen. Something must be happening here, I can feel a weird zinging in the atmosphere. With a nervous anticipation running through my body, I follow behind them trying to be patient while I prepare to find out the truth.

  “So, how was your day out shopping? Did you find anything nice? Anything you want to talk about?” They share that same look again before bursting into odd giggles. They know something, I can see the secret floating between them and I desperately want to be let in on it. “What is going on here? Will you just tell me already?”

  “I erm, I haven’t been feeling so well recently, and so I erm, I decided to do a test. To find out…”

  “A test?” I furrow my eyebrows. “What the hell did you do a test for? Like, at the doctors?”

  She pulls something out of her bag and hands it to me. It’s a white plastic thing that doesn’t really tell me anything. I examine it closer, noting a faint blue cross symbol on it. It’s a weird contraption…

  “Oh, for goodness sake, Jordan, it’s a pregnancy test.” Rachel snaps and rolls her eyes at me. “Goodness me, the anticipation is killing me already. You’re going to have a baby. Veronica is pregnant.”

  My heart stops dead in my chest, this is seriously shocking. I stare at Veronica, trying to work out if this is some sort of practical joke, but she simply smiles back, acknowledging that this is the truth. She went out to get a wedding dress and came back with a baby in her belly. This is the wildest news ever. Shocking, but lovely.

  “You’re…” My throat rasps, I’m in shock. “You’re having a baby? You’re pregnant? Is this real?”

  She nods, n
ervously at first but soon she does so enthusiastically. “Yeah, I’m having a baby. That’s mad.”

  “Yeah, it is mad.” I giggle wildly, feeling utterly insane. “That’s really insane. But good mad, right?”

  She leaps up from her seat and wraps her arms around me. As we embrace, I can feel her heart hammering against her rib cage. She’s more nervous than she’s letting on. I squeeze her to me and try to comfort her as much as I can. This isn’t expected, this certainly isn’t something that we planned for, but it’s good, isn’t it? We’re good. We’ve been through so much together, we can handle this as well. We should have known that this was a possibility, we haven’t exactly been the most careful. Sometimes we get carried away. This is what happens!

  “We’re going to have a baby.” Veronica pulls back to look at me intensely. “Are you okay with that?”

  I nod slowly, letting it sink in. “You know what, I am. I’m really happy. This is going to be awesome.” I dip my head down and give her a chaste little kiss. “Come on, let’s go out to celebrate. You too, Rachel. Let’s go and have some dinner. This is amazing news. Isn’t it?” Rachel nod excitedly. “Yes, well let’s go.”

  ***

  The next morning, I wake up to see Veronica looking down on me with a loving grin on her face. I rub my eyes, needing the sleep to go so I can work out why she’s giving me such a keen look. There have been enough secrets in the last couple of days, I hope there aren’t more about to come my way. Not bad news anyway.

  “Are you alright?” I ask in a croaky voice while propping up onto my elbows. “Good morning, by the way.”

  “I’m just watching my future husband sleep, that’s all. Nothing wrong with that, is there?”

  “Oh, about that.” There’s something I didn’t get a chance to say last night. “I was thinking that maybe we should put off the wedding until the baby is born, don’t you? It’s due about the same time.”

  “What?” She furrows her eyebrows and gives me a confused look. “Why would you say that?”

  “Well, because you’ll be heavily pregnant and it probably won’t be much fun, will it? I know that we’ve booked the venue and stuff already, but that can all be changed without any hassle. Just a phone call.”

  “No way.” She shakes her head. “No way. We’ve waited too long to get married. It’ll be fine.”

  “Are you sure? You might change your mind later on down the line. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”

  “No, I want to get married. I want to get married to you when it’s all arranged.” She pouts out her bottom lip. “I want to get married as soon as possible. I’ve been excited for it. Honestly, it’ll be fine. All I will need to do is get a dress that can be extended. It’ll be nice to keep our baby in the ceremony and it’ll be nice to wed first.”

  She already knows that I’ll do whatever she wants. I nod rapidly. “Okay, sure whatever you want.”

  She throws her arms around me and holds me tight. “Thank you so much, Jordan, I really appreciate it. I’m not trying to be difficult or anything, I just want to get married. I want to be your wife. So damn much!”

  I know how much I want that too as she kisses me hard. My chest swells and my heart flutters with intense love. I love her so much, it burns and swells. And now we’re going to have a baby to add into that. How much better can life get? We’re going to have a real family, all of us. I cannot wait for this to develop.

  “So, I suppose we’ll have to start baby shopping as well as wedding shopping, am I right?”

  “Well, we need to find out what we’re having first.” I rub her belly smiling to myself. “Then we can fully decorate the place, don’t you think? Get a nursery on the go? Pink or blue, what do you think?”

  “Oh, come on. We don’t have to stick to gender centric colors we can do whatever we want.”

  I roll my eyes at her. “You know full well that I didn’t mean that. What do you think we’re having?”

  She darts her eyes downwards and smiles. “I don’t know. I don’t mind either. But possibly a boy.”

  A list of names spins through my mind, immediately I can feel myself get carried away. Last night, this news was shocking, but today I’m nothing but happy about it. The celebration last night got me really excited. It was nice to have her best friend with us, the girl who has been there from the start, all the way through college. Rachel has been good for Veronica, and I’m glad to have her still around. I know that she cares so much about Veronica too, and she struggled so much with the knowledge that Veronica was in trouble, almost as much as me.

  “Yeah, I think we might be having a little boy too. My own little football player.”

  “Oh no, you are not pushing your football dreams on our baby.” Veronica giggles. “No way.”

  I push myself out of the bed and lean down to give Veronica another kiss. “Well, for now, I’m going to make you some breakfast. I’ll make Rachel some too, although she might still be asleep.”

  “Ooh, okay, well I’ll get in the shower and I’ll be downstairs soon. Rachel is headed to the train soon to go home so I’ll take her there, then I might make a doctor’s appointment. I haven’t been checked over yet.”

  Of course, those words make me immediately panic, I just can’t help it. Any mention of the doctor reminds me of the time way back when, all those months spent in the hospital. I honestly think all of that still affects me much more than it does her. She’s put it behind her, whereas it still affects me. I still feel that intense worry.

  I suppose, if I’m going to be a father, then I’ll need to get used to that worry every single day. A child will be frightening, there will be danger in everything, every single day. I’m going to have to try and hold myself back so I don’t cause panic all around. I can’t let the past affect the future any longer.

  “Yes,” I reply calmly. “A doctor’s appointment is a good idea. Let’s do that. I suppose there will be a lot of those. After that, we should go and check out a baby store. See what we want to buy.”

  “Ooh, you are keen.” Veronica wiggles her eyebrows at me. “I like that. It means you want this.”

  “It’s a surprise, and I do want this. I want this so badly.” I can’t keep the glee from my voice. “I think it’s going to be amazing. We’re going to be parents. Who would have thought it?”

  As I smile to myself, I feel like I always knew it. I always thought we would end up this way. Happy and in love.

  ***

  I clutch onto Veronica’s hand while we stare excitedly at the black and white grainy image coming to life on the screen. That’s my baby there, my little miracle there, I can’t believe how wonderful he or she looks.

  “Your baby looks very healthy,” the sonographer reassures us both. “Look, you can see the little heart beat here.” The thumping brings tears to my eyes, it’s so emotional. “And the little arms and legs. Do you want to know what you’re having? If not, you might want to look away now.”

  I stare at Veronica, wondering what she’s thinking. We’ve discussed it and decided not to find out, to keep our baby’s gender as a surprise, but now that we’re here I kinda want to know. The idea that the doctor will know before me is irritating. I can feel my impatience growing… but it isn’t just up to me.

  “What do you think?” I ask her with a half shrug, I don’t want my desperation to influence Veronica’s decision. If she wants to keep it a secret then so be it. She’s the one growing our child after all. “You want to know?”

  She blushes brightly, the adorable redness staining her cheeks. “I think I might want to know, do you mind?”

  Oh, thank goodness. I nod enthusiastically. “Yes, of course, I would love to know too. I wonder if you’re right and we’re having a baby boy.” I honestly have no idea and I don’t mind either way. I would like either. I want both in the long run. I would like a whole football team if possible. “Let’s find out.”

  The sonographer smiles again at the pair of us. “Well, I’m afraid
to say you’re wrong. It’s a girl.”

  A girl. A little daughter. I’m so happy. I have this picture of a gorgeous little mini me of Veronica running around the house. A little fiery red head to light up my life even more. My heart swells with joy while I think about it, it’s going to be perfect, just what I want. Those bastards didn’t take anything away from me, from either of us. They wanted to, they tried to, but they got nothing. None of us at all.

  Veronica squeals with glee. “A girl? Are you serious? Oh, my goodness, this is amazing.”

  “Yep, look you can see. A little girl. You’re going to have a daughter.”

  “Well, we’re going to have to rethink all of our names. We’ve mostly been thinking about boy names, haven’t we?” I squeeze Veronica’s hand tight. “Do you have any ideas?”

  “Oh, so many,” Veronica laughs. “I have so many girl names, you have no idea.”

  I lean my head against hers and we stare at the screen watching our little baby, almost forgetting that the sonographer is in the room with us. This will be our future now. Our stunning little family. It’s perfect.

  33

  Veronica

  “Do I look okay?” I ask Rachel while I smooth down my dress. “Does this look okay over my bump?”

  “It looks perfect. Honestly, you look beautiful. The girls at the dress shop did a great job.”

  I stare at my reflection in the mirror, actually managing to feel a little beautiful. I’m massive now, as big as a whale, I suppose Jordan was right about how challenging this is going to be, but I still don’t mind. I still want to marry him so much that I would go through anything to become his wife. The sleek elegant dress which has been sculpted to show off my ever-growing bump is a little tighter than last time, but it still fits. It’s okay. And my hair – which has grown a lot thicker and glossier while being pregnant – has been curled to perfection. My make-up is flawless too. Thank God for Rachel, she’s made me look awesome. I don’t know where I’d be without her.