Claiming Amelia

by Jessica Blake

  She gasped, then smiled as I grabbed a handful of her bottle-colored hair. I pulled her head back so far she couldn’t see what I was doing. Her eyes were huge, but she moaned.

  “You like it rough?”

  She couldn’t move her head, but she licked her lips. “Yes.” The word was a tiny breeze of air.

  I let go of her hair and slid my hand down to her throat. I didn’t clamp down to restrict her breathing, only to make her submissive. When her muscles relaxed, I let go and spread her thighs apart before rolling on the condom I’d tossed on the bed. Without preamble, I rammed into her balls deep. She cried out at the suddenness of it but arched her back, giving me more of her. Over and over, I drove into her without so much as a kiss or brushing her nipple. This was sex, nothing more.

  In my head, I summoned up every nuance of rejection and hatred I’d endured, pounding her hips deeply into the mattress with my fury. I was like a cold, steel piston; relentless and unfeeling. I knew what I was doing was wrong, using her this way, but couldn’t seem to stop myself.

  Then something quite unexplainable happened. What felt like a current of warmth and light descended over me like a layer of insulation from the world around me. I tried to lift my head to see if there was a physical entity above me, but my body was becoming unbelievably heavy. The burning anger became sadness, and I actually felt a bit frightened. My dick went limp, and I fell out of the blonde and onto my back, staggering beneath the strange sensations rolling through me.

  Her eyes wide, she rolled away from me and to her feet, gathering her clothes as she rounded the bed to leave the room.

  “Hey!” I tried to bark, but it sounded like a pathetic whimper. I reached for my wallet and threw two thousand-dollar bills in her direction. I wanted to tell her I was sorry. Wanted to ask for her forgiveness. She didn’t deserve the treatment she’d just experienced at my hands.

  Like a dog sneaking a bite of a dropped steak, she took a step forward and scooped up the bills. I heard the elevator door ding as it opened and again as she flew downward in it. I wondered if she had enough sense to halt the elevator until she was dressed, wondered if she’d be alright.

  I laid on the bed, laboring as though trapped in thick syrup and wondered briefly if this was what a fly felt like when it became tangled in the spider’s web. I wondered if I was having a stroke or maybe an aneurism. I really didn’t feel sick at all. In fact, quite the opposite. I felt light and warm and smothered with love. There was nothing I wanted to do but lie there and revel in it, and that’s exactly what I did. Eventually, I fell asleep, or so I assumed the next morning when I awakened. Perhaps I’d died for a time.

  I threw my things together and had a limo waiting to take me to the airport. It wasn’t until the jet landed at Standiford Field that I relaxed enough to breathe.

  I headed straight for the Y — straight to Liane. She looked up from her perch behind the counter as I cleared the doorway. I don’t know what I would have done if she hadn’t been there that day. I think I would have gone mad.

  “When are you off?” I asked in a strained voice.

  Her eyes were steady as if she’d been expecting me. “I’m just now getting my things together.”

  “I need you to come with me.” I couldn’t put it in any better language than that. I was beyond thinking rationally.

  “I know,” she said simply and came around from behind the counter. She leaned up and kissed me fully on the mouth, then on the side of my neck as she whispered the words I would never forget. “I love you. I’m here. It will be okay.”

  ***

  I headed toward my car, but Liane came up beside me and snagged my keys from my hand. “I think I’d better do that.”

  I fought off the urge to kiss her again; the need was so great. I nodded and climbed into the passenger seat. “Drive where I tell you,” I said, and she nodded.

  We didn’t speak — words just didn’t seem to be appropriate. I gave her directions, and although it had grown dark, she drove competently and without question. When we came to my driveway, I opened the glove box and hit the remote to open the high gates that fenced me from the world. She pulled forward through the opening and paused long enough to make sure it locked behind us. She seemed nonplussed, although I knew it was a novel and potentially dangerous situation in which to place herself.

  She trusts me.

  We pulled up to the house, and as we climbed from the car, Diablo was restless and snorting, his hooves kicking the walls of his stall. He knew there was a stranger on his turf.

  I took Liane’s hand and led her to the barn to meet him. As soon as she walked into the warm, fragrant space where only a single light bulb burned a circle of awareness, he settled immediately. In fact, he became docile and raised his muzzle toward her hand so that she might stroke him. She cooed to him, and he came closer, wanting her to open the gate and climb aboard. I recognized instantly the effect she was having and did as he wanted. Snapping reins onto his bridle, I heaved myself onto his back and sat upright, extending my hand down to Liane to slide up behind me. She did so easily, and Diablo shifted from side to side like a child nestling down into a soft blanket.

  We left the barn and let Diablo have his head, but he didn’t gallop as he normally did when first released. He walked, almost in a dancelike movement designed to keep her seated and against the warmth of his hide. The moon was bright, and there was no need for light. He knew his way, and I trusted him. Liane snuggled into my back, her arms wrapped around my waist — not to keep from falling, but in a hug of love. Diablo knew where I wanted to go. Like so many times before, he always knew.

  We stood at the highest point where Carlos Acres could be seen, rolled out like a carpet of magnificent grandeur and lights. In the darkness, I could almost pretend that it belonged to me, as it should. I could ignore the fact that there were people there who didn’t want me; didn’t even care if I was alive. Yet, of all that lay before me, it was their love I wanted most.

  Liane said nothing, and when we returned to the barn, she slid off effortlessly and picked up a brush to groom Diablo gently before returning him to his stall. Without asking, she nabbed an apple from a nearby bucket and fed it to him, stroking his muzzle.

  As we walked to the house, I asked, “Do you ride often?”

  She smiled, a tiny upward tilt of her lips. “I’ve never touched a horse in my life.”

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  Hawk

  The house was warm, but unnaturally quiet when we walked through the front door. I opened a window to air things a bit. “Why don’t you shower while I make us a pot of tea and something to eat?” Liane suggested.

  I nodded, and it felt like I was gliding as I walked. It was all so effortless. I toweled off after the shower and threw on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt. I found her waiting, curled on the sofa with a tray set up on the coffee table. Two steaming mugs of tea sat next to a platter of sandwiches and it occurred to me I’d never seen a more delicious banquet.

  “Sit down, Hawk,” she said, pointing to the chair opposite hers. “We need to talk about a few things.” They were the words that I’d waited to hear but didn’t want to say.

  I picked up a mug and nodded before sitting down. She wasted no time, and her voice was almost like a symphonic instrument awaiting its cue to begin playing.

  “There are secrets in this room which must be released,” she began. “Secrets are not always bad, but when they are, they’re poison. I know you have things to tell me, but I’m asking that you let me talk first. It may make a difference in what you have to tell me.” She folded her long hair over one shoulder and tucked her legs beneath herself more snugly. It was a movement that suggested insecurity.

  I drank more of my tea, waiting for her to begin.

  “Hawk, I need to share something about myself that may make you a bit uncomfortable at first. I hope you’ll respond the way I think you will, but if you don’t, I’ll call a cab and leave you be.”

  I
lowered the mug and leaned forward, shaking my head as if to tell her no.

  She lifted a hand and smiled gently. “It’s quite alright, just listen.”

  I pulled off the sunglasses I wore night and day. I wanted her to see the real me as she spoke. Her response was another gentle smile and nod of agreement that it was about time.

  “Hawk, you know how I shared the fact that I’m an empath, as was my mother and her mother.” I nodded. “Well, there’s one part of it that I didn’t go into detail about because I wasn’t exactly sure whether I could reproduce it at will or whether it was a one-time coincidence. When my mother was in her last days, she was beyond the pain medicines and suffering in agony. I sat by her bed and felt so helpless. She and I had always had a special connection. I summoned in my mind a visual of a hot air balloon in a pasture, bathed in warm spring sunshine. It’s difficult to explain the how part of it, but I mentally sent her that vision. I knew she received it because I saw her smile and relax; she even nodded a bit. The only problem was that this sort of transfer wasn’t a one-way street. I took on her pain and had to leave her side and go outdoors before I could feel it go away. It wasn’t pleasant.”

  I swallowed, trying to wrap my head around what she was telling me. “Why are you telling me this?”

  “I’ve never done that before, or since…” her gaze met mine and a ripple of fear went through me because I knew what she was about to say, “until last night.”

  I stood up so hard and so fast my chair toppled backwards. This was crazy talk. The woman I was falling in love with was crazy. Or a witch. A liar. She stood up too, turning toward me, watching me pace the room. I glanced at her and it was… her. Not some witch. Not some trickster. Not a liar intent on doing me harm.

  Her.

  My beautiful Liane. A magical creature of light.

  And I was drawn to her, just as I’d been drawn to her from the beginning. And just like that, I decided to accept whatever else she needed to tell me.

  She exhaled, feeling my acceptance and sank back into her chair. I followed, picking mine up from the floor, pulling it closer to her.

  “I was at home, and a sense of darkness came over me,” she continued her story as if there had been no interruption. “An emotional darkness — it felt like fury. Hawk, I knew it came from you. I have the ability to connect to you. I’ve had it since the first day we met. I know this all sounds hokey, but you have to accept my word as the truth as I perceive it.”

  I nodded and knew what was coming.

  “What I didn’t know, however, is that I could pick up your energy from such a distance. I “sent” you and image of a warm hug with the intention of slowing you down. It was also supposed to absorb the anger you were feeling. It worked, didn’t it?”

  I nodded again.

  “What I didn’t expect was that your anger would boomerang back at me. I became intensely angry and bitter. I wanted to hurt someone. No one I knew — just someone. That came from you, didn’t it?”

  Looking down at the floor, I said, “Yes.”

  “I don’t know exactly what had you so angry, or how you were acting out, but I felt what you’d been feeling. It wasn’t pleasant, and we need to talk about it.”

  The thought of causing her pain was agony. “I’ll leave you be, Liane. I don’t ever want you to feel pain or anger because of me. I can’t let that happen.”

  “No, no, Hawk, it’s no good. We’re already connected, you and I. It wouldn’t matter if you went to Antarctica, I would still feel it. Our connection is too strong to escape.”

  I was silent, trying to put into words what I had to tell her, judging how much she should hear. If what she was saying was accurate, then my telling her of the horrors of the past would make her feel my pain.

  “It doesn’t work like that,” she murmured, and I knew she’d read my mind. “Hawk, there is in each of us an energy that is always passing in and out of us. We aren’t solid; we’re an accumulation of energy “units” for lack of a better word. Just like light travels, so does that energy. I think my brain is a superconductor, if you will. I am tuned in to you, just as I was with my mother. I feel that darkness that haunts you and I want to help you rid yourself of it. When you release that anger, you release it for both of us.”

  I looked at Liane, and her peace was settling over my thoughts. It was almost as if she glowed. “What do I do?” I asked her.

  “We have to feel our way through it. I’m no expert in this and as weird as it sounds, I’m a little scared of it too. With my mother, I simply had to leave the bedroom. With you, it’s more powerful. I don’t even know where you were, but I guess it wasn’t here last night.”

  “I was in California.”

  She reached out a hand to steady herself. “You see?” she said, her eyes wide and filled with awe and maybe a little fear. “You can’t go far enough to shield me.” Lifting my fingers to her lips, she kissed each knuckle, then held my hand to her cheek. “I believe that you’ll have to share some of yourself with me. Maybe not everything, but enough so that I recognize what triggers your hurt and anger. Then, maybe, together we can learn to not let those thoughts into your head and eventually, they will lose their power over you, and consequently, me.”

  I looked at her with skepticism.

  “I know. I know it sounds strange.” She put down the mug of tea and rose to her feet. Look, maybe this is a bad idea. I really don’t know what I’m doing in all of this. I only know how it feels. You’ve acknowledged that you felt it last night. But maybe I’m in way over my head, and I should just grab a cab back into town and leave you alone.”

  “No! No, Liane, don’t go!” I burst with a need to have her remain.

  She stopped and looked at me; at the misery on my face. Finally, she said, “My dad had his calling. Maybe in some sense, you are mine.”

  I held my hand out to her, and she took it. I pulled her down onto my lap, and she sat sideways, leaning into my chest. I gently pulled her head against me, and I smelled the chlorine and sunshine in her hair. She’d been swimming that day and probably hadn’t gotten the chance to shampoo it away. It was a wonderful smell. “I don’t understand all this, but you’re right. I felt the blackness you know about, and I also felt the warmth you sent me. You got me through it. Liane, I need you in my life. Not just to be my “energy shrink” but because there’s something about you I can’t get enough of. I can’t work, can’t sleep and barely get through anything I start because I just want to come and find you and keep you with me. Believe me, when I say this isn’t typical for a guy like me. I’ve seen some bad things, and they’ve driven me to hole up and live by myself. I’m not used to needing. Not anyone or anything.”

  I felt her head nod beneath my chin.

  “I don’t want you to hurt, though,” I told her. “I don’t want to lose you, either. Hell, I don’t know what to do.” I was feeling so conflicted and out of my normal element. Lack of control didn’t sit well with me.

  “Do you trust me?” Liane asked.

  It took me a second, but only because I realized what I was about to say. “Yes, I think for the first time in my life, I truly trust someone. Yes, I trust you.”

  “Then let me carry this for you. Tell me the darkness that envelopes you so I can help you banish it and we’ll both be free of the pain it brings you.”

  “Do you trust me?” I asked in return, and she nodded. “Then come with me and lie on my bed. This will take a lot of telling.”

  She slid off my lap and we headed toward my room. I pulled back the covers and tucked her in, pushing the outside blankets beneath her. It was the closest I’d ever come to a loving gesture. I laid down beside her and slid my arm beneath her head, pulling her close. I was careful not to touch her in any other way. She needed to know I was a man of my word.

  I didn’t know how to begin, so I got the worst of it out of the way first. “I killed my uncle.” Her body jerked a bit at my words, but she didn’t pull away.

 
; “Go on,” she whispered.

  “Well, I’ve got this crazy situation in my family. When she was young, my maternal grandmother had an affair with my paternal grandfather, who was married at the time. There was a baby, and my grandmother was going to put it up for adoption. Instead, my grandfather adopted the child anonymously. He was intent that no one ever know.”

  Liane’s hand clutched a fistful of my shirt, but she didn’t say a word.

  “My grandfather had made some enemies with the wrong people and they switched the baby, using the real heir as leverage. So, my grandfather took in a stranger’s baby, thinking it was his own blood. His name was Linc, and he was killed in a car accident when he was sixteen. There is some mystery surrounding that, but my grandfather was a very evil man, and I’m fairly sure he was tied to a murder at some point in his past.”

  “How terrible for everyone.”

  I kissed her hair. “Yes. Well, one day this man shows up and tells my dad that he’s the real Linc and wants to be restored to the family, but he was one evil son-of-a-bitch. Long story short, he kidnapped me and took me to my grandfather’s farm. I’d just been Christmas shopping with my father, and I’d bought him a pocket knife as a gift. I managed to get around my uncle and pulled the knife I’d been carrying in my pocket. Okay, I admit, I wanted to play with it a bit first so it was in my pocket. Anyway, I stabbed him in the neck, and he bled out.”

  I expected her to pull away, but she snuggled closer. “How old were you?”

  “Thirteen. I’d been farmed out to a military school as a younger boy before all of that happened. I guess I was too much to handle, and my parents were busy having their own cozy little nest. After the incident with my uncle, they bought a condo in Florida and told me my mother was pregnant with twins. I didn’t want any more brothers or sisters, and I told them so. I guess it spooked them, given the situation with my uncle. They turned me over to a shrink, and he gave me all kinds of pills, labeled me as psychotic. I got some more, here and there and I was pretty messed up in my head. I didn’t care, though, because they didn’t care and the angrier they got at me, the more I lashed out. I remember hating everyone. Guess I was living up to my label.”