The place was empty. Butch was gone, and she was too late. Too late to apologize for lying. Too late to knock Butch to the ground for doing such an awful thing to her.
Slowly, she walked toward the house. What would it have been like to live in such a dirty place and to smell the stomach-churning odor every day? To get up first thing in the morning and face the reeking stench?
Dropping onto the chopping block, she hung her head in her hands and stared at a beetle crawling on a stem of grass. Butch was gone, and that was that.
But how could she face the people in town? They’d all wonder what she’d lied about and if she was lying whenever she talked to them. Nobody would trust her, ever again.
She picked up a rock and flung it at the house.
Butch had ruined her life.
And she hated him for it.
Maybe the best thing for her to do was leave town, too. Just run away. But she’d miss her ma—and her new papa. The worst thing of all would be staying and seeing the disappointment in their eyes.
Her vision blurred as tears formed.
“What do I do now?”
Quick hoofbeats approached, and the horse slid to a halt. Someone dismounted and walked toward her, but she was too embarrassed to lift her head.
Luke.
She recognized his boots.
Would he hate her now?
“Half bit, what are you doing here?”
She shrugged. How could she explain her reason for coming here when she didn’t understand it herself?
Luke squatted on his boot heels in front of her. “I’m sorry about those words in town. I’ll make sure they’re all gone today.”
Love for him flooded her. She sucked in a loud sob and leaped into his arms. He grabbed her with one arm and struggled not to fall backward. Then he stood, taking her with him. She cried on his strong shoulders, and he just held her, patting her back. “Shh…everything will be all right. You’ll see.”
She shoved back and wiggled her legs, so he let her down. “It won’t never be right again.”
He reached out and ran his hand down the side of her head. “It seems that way now, but you’ll see.”
She crossed her arms and paced toward the hog pen, then reconsidered and walked over to Luke’s horse and patted his neck. “Everybody will think I’m a liar.”
“Once those letters are painted over, folks will quickly forget about them.”
She shook her head. “No, they won’t. Jenny’s gonna print them in her newspaper, and the whole world will know.”
“I’ll talk to Jenny and see if she’ll mention what happened but keep you out of her article as much as possible. Most folks won’t even know which ‘Jack’ the words are referring to, and besides, what happened isn’t your fault.”
Luke strode over and stood behind her, his hands resting on her shoulders. “Don’t make too much of this, half bit. Butch was just lashing out, trying to hurt you. He wasn’t even man enough to stay and face the consequences of his behavior.”
Jack’s insides swirled, and she knew she had to come clean or forever be in misery. “What he said was…true.”
Luke gently turned her to face him. “What do you mean?”
She couldn’t stand seeing disgust in Luke’s eyes when she finally confessed the truth, so she stared at his boots. “I lied about Butch. Several times.”
Luke lifted her chin with his forefinger. A muscle in his jaw flexed. “About what?”
She pulled away and stalked down the road several feet. “About when he pushed me down at the river. And I didn’t correct you when you thought he’d stolen that pie from Mrs. Burke, even though I knew Billy had done it.”
Luke uttered a heavy sigh, but he didn’t say anything for a while. Finally, she couldn’t stand waiting for his wrath and turned around. He stood with his head hanging, hands on his hips. “I’m disappointed, half bit.”
Her lips wobbled and tears filled her eyes. Would he not want to be her papa now?
“When you lied and I believed you, I had a talk with Butch. I accused him of things he didn’t do, and that made me look bad and made him angry and not trust me. Do you understand?”
She hadn’t thought about how her lying would affect Luke. She’d made things difficult for him. He always believed her and acted accordingly. She was pond scum.
“It’s important for people to trust me as marshal. I wrongly accused that boy and even made him stay in jail for several days. Maybe there was more to him than I gave him credit for.”
“I’m sorry, Luke.”
“Me, too.” He looped Alamo’s reins over his head. “C’mon, your ma is worried. I need to get you back to town.”
He climbed on, then held his hand out to her. She looked up, despising the sad look she’d put on his face. “Do you hate me?”
His expression immediately changed. He pulled her up behind him. “Of course not. I’ll always love you, no matter what. But I am disappointed you didn’t trust me enough to tell me the truth.”
She wrapped her arms around his waist and leaned against his back as he guided his horse back to town. “I didn’t know you so well back then.”
Luke patted her hands. “I guess that’s true, but you know me now and didn’t tell me the truth about the pie.”
She winced. “I was afraid Billy would do something mean if I snitched on him.”
“I see. When we return home, we’ll have a talk with your mother, and if she agrees, I’ll expect you to help me repaint the buildings that were defaced.”
She nodded against his back. If she helped him, the dreaded words would be gone all the sooner—and she’d miss a day of school.
At least she knew Luke still loved her. And she wouldn’t lie anymore. It hurt too many people.
But she still hated Butch for painting those words.
CHAPTER 29
Mark tossed the ropes into the back of the empty wagon. He walked around, checking the horses’ harnesses, even though he knew Garrett had already done that. He glanced over at the new store. It looked fresh and bright with its new coat of paint. It would soon open. That would enable him to be in town more since they wouldn’t be going to Dallas so often for supplies. Then maybe he could get back to reading his law books.
The door to the boardinghouse opened, and Shannon walked out and closed it behind her. She glanced down the street, then strode toward him with purpose evident in her steps. He longed to pull her into his arms and show her the depths of his heart, but she deserved so much better than him. If only he’d never gone to Abilene.
But he couldn’t change what had happened there, and he’d never ask Shannon to marry a murderer.
Yeah, it was a fair fight. The other man drew first—even fired first, but he’d missed. Mark had pulled his gun in self-defense, fearing for his and Annabelle’s lives, and he’d accidentally killed that man. It didn’t matter that the marshal had said it wasn’t a crime. He’d taken a life. Shame twisted his insides and made him refuse to grasp hold of what he wanted most in life—to marry Shannon.
She glanced at the office, then back at him, and stopped near the door. He walked up the boardwalk steps and stared at her. Did she still have affections for him?
He thought so by the look in her eyes. Her lips pursed, and she looked away.
“Is Garrett here?”
Mark winced. What did she want with his brother that she couldn’t tell him? “He’s over at Polly’s, gettin’ a lunch packed for us. We’re heading out to Dallas as soon as he returns.”
Shannon nodded but nibbled on her lower lip. “I suppose I can tell you. Could we go inside?”
He opened the door and held it as she glided inside, her skirts touching his pants and her flowery scent wrapping around him. He missed her. Missed working with her. Missed staring across the room at her while she was putting numbers into the ledger. He sighed hard. “What do you need? I left all the new orders on the desk under the paperweight. I imagine this will be the last big pile you
’ll have to work through since the store is reopening soon and our workload is likely to go down.”
She nodded and paced the room, looking everywhere but at him. She glanced over her shoulder but kept her back to him. “’Tis a good thing, then.”
“What is?”
“That the workload is lessening.”
“And why is that? It’s been great business for us.”
“Because I need to inform you that next week will be my last one.”
His heart took another stab. Shannon was quitting? He’d never see her if that happened. “But why? I thought you liked working here.”
“I do, but my circumstances are changing.”
Had she decided to leave town? Found another job? “Changing? How?”
She was quiet so long that he thought she hadn’t heard him—or maybe she wasn’t going to answer. “I’m getting married a week from Sunday.”
Mark grasped Garrett’s desk to keep from falling to his knees at her declaration. How? Who? “You can’t be getting married.”
She whirled around, her eyes no longer compassionate but filled with fire. “Who are you to tell me I can’t marry?”
“I…but…” She was right. He had no claim on her even though his heart belonged only to her. Why, God? Why couldn’t I have stayed in Lookout and kept myself pure for this woman? Why did You place her in this town when You knew I couldn’t have her?
His chest hurt so bad he wondered if he was having heart failure. She stepped forward, a concerned look replacing the anger. “Are you all right?”
He straightened and forced a smile. “Of course. I just can’t believe you found someone to marry so fast.”
Her nostrils flared and eyes sparked. “Just because you find me lacking doesn’t mean other men do.” She yanked open the desk drawer and pulled out a sheet of paper. It was the one with tic marks on it. He’d wondered what it meant. She marched over, holding the paper in front of his face. “You see this? Each mark represents a marriage proposal—ones I got in this office, no less. There are plenty of men who want to marry me, even though you don’t.”
“I never said I didn’t want to marry you.” The words fled his mouth before he could yank them back.
“What?” She blinked and stared at him, the paper zigzagging as it floated to the floor.
It was his turn to break from her gaze. He hadn’t wanted her to know the depth of his feelings. It wasn’t fair to her. “Nothing. That was a slip of the tongue.”
“I see. Well, you now know that I’ll be quitting. It’s possible that Leah may want this job, though I’ve not talked to her about it.”
Mark frowned. Hiring Leah Bennett was the last thing he wanted to do after the way she’d dumped his good friend. “We’ll manage. The doc says he’ll take my cast off on Tuesday, so I can do the bookwork from now on.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Just who are you marrying, if I may ask?”
Her mouth worked, pulling his gaze to her beautiful lips. She did the most intriguing things with them. She frowned as if she didn’t want to tell him. He swiped his hand through the air. “Fine. Don’t tell me, but word will be around town soon enough. I’m just surprised I hadn’t heard about it already.”
“I haven’t told anyone yet. A marriage is a private affair between a man and a woman.”
Mark snorted a laugh. “Maybe in Ireland, but not in America. Here, a wedding is generally a celebration of family and friends. I just don’t see how you found someone so fast to marry. Are you sure you’re not jumping into this too quickly? Maybe you shouldn’t be in such a hurry.”
Shannon gasped. “Ach, who are you to be tellin’ me what to do? Do you or do you not wish to be a lawyer?”
Mark shifted his feet and crossed his arms. “What’s that got to do with anything?”
“You stand there judging me. You, who didn’t want me, now thinks you can give me advice on when to marry? You don’t even have the nerve to face your own brother. To tell him that you want to be a lawyer and not in this business with him. I have changed my mind. I quit as of this moment.”
Her quick steps clicked on the floor as she made a beeline for the door. She was right, of course. “Wait! Please.”
She paused with her hand on the door. “What is it?”
He ran his hand through his hair, but what he needed to say couldn’t be said to her back. “Shannon, would you look at me? Please?”
She sighed and turned, arms crossed over her chest.
“I…did something. Several years ago. I’d give anything to undo it, but I can’t.”
“What sort of thing?”
He shook his head. “I can’t tell you. I’ve never told a soul, not even Garrett, but suffice it to say, that’s what’s standing in the way of our relationship. If I could marry you, I’d do it in a heartbeat.”
Surprise engulfed her face, but her expression quickly changed. “How could you say such a thing to a woman you know is getting married? You had your chance at winning my heart, but I remember clearly you saying you’d never marry. And now because I am, you think you can waltz in and say you would marry me if you could? I don’t see a thing to stop you.”
“You don’t understand.”
“You’re right. I don’t. I’m sorry, Mark. I think we could have had a wonderful life together if you would quit living in the past. God forgives us for our wrongdoings. Maybe we can never marry, but you need to find His forgiveness for whatever happened in the past and move on. Don’t let it keep you from living a happy life and becoming a lawyer. You’d make a fine one, you would.”
She yanked the door open, strode out, and slammed it shut. He sat there numb—even more so than that night in Denison. He felt gutted. Empty. The only woman he’d ever truly loved was marrying someone else. She would, in fact, be married before he returned to Lookout. How could he ever be whole without her in his life?
“Well, well, well. She sure gave you a piece of her mind, didn’t she?”
Mark jumped and turned to find Annabelle standing in the back room. “What are you doing here? And just how much did you hear?”
“All of it.” She grinned. “I looked for you out back, and when I didn’t find you, I came in the rear door and was going to walk through the office, but then I heard you two come in and hid.”
“A decent woman would have left out the back door or else let us know you were present.”
A saucy smile pulled at her lips. “And just what do you think dear, sweet Shannon would have said if she found me in here?”
Mark swatted the air. “Does it really matter? She’s getting married.”
“I know. I heard.” She sashayed toward him. Her clothes might be different, but they didn’t disguise her flirtatious, saloon-girl ways. “You actually love her, don’t you?”
He shrugged. “So what if I do? She’s marrying some other yahoo. She must not have cared for me much if she could agree to marry someone else so soon.”
Annabelle shook her head and leaned back against his desk. “You men can be awfully dense at times.”
“What does that mean?”
“Just what do you expect Shannon to do? Do you have any idea how hard it must be for her to come here several days a week and work for you when she’s in love with you, but you’ve all but told her you don’t want her?”
“That’s not what I said.”
“But it’s what she heard. She’s all alone in this world, from what I understand. You can’t expect her to keep working here with things as they are. And where does that leave her? With no job, she has no other alternative except to marry—or work in a saloon.” Her teasing smile turned his stomach.
Mark strode across the room and leaned into Annabelle’s face. “Don’t you talk about her in such a manner. Shannon would starve to death before working in a saloon.”
“Ah, so you do love her.” She sighed heavily. “Guess that leaves me out on the streets again.”
“What do you mean?”
“Why do you think
I came here, Mark? I was hoping we could pick up where we were before you shot that cowboy.”
Mark’s stomach turned at the verbal mention of his misdeed. Had she told anyone about that? If so, he’d probably want to run away like Jack had after that bully painted those words on half the buildings in town. What if Annabelle had done that?
Mark is a killer.
He shuddered at the thought.
“Are you just going to let her marry Rand Kessler?”
“Kessler?” The fact that Shannon was marrying an honorable, well-to-do rancher didn’t soothe him at all.
She smirked. “Shannon didn’t tell you? I hear he’s a fine catch.”
“I thought you heard everything she said.”
She shrugged. “I might have missed a few words.”
“What is it you want, Annabelle? I need to get on the road.”
“I came here to woo you myself, but I can see that your heart belongs to another. So, you gonna let her get away, or are you gonna be the man I know you are, put your past behind you, once and for all, and marry the gal you love?”
“You make it sound so simple.”
“It is.” She laid her hand on his arm. “What you did back in Abilene was an honorable thing.”
Mark harrumphed. “Since when is killing a man honorable?”
“You were protecting me from being mauled by that cowboy. All you did was tell him to stop. He’s the one who got mad and pulled the gun. You were just defending me and yourself. Why is that so hard to understand?”
“When you’ve been raised in church, you’re taught that killing someone is a sin.”
“So, isn’t your God supposed to be the forgiving type?”
Mark nodded. How odd to have an ex-saloon girl preaching to him.
“Well, if He forgives you, then it’s time you forgave yourself.”
He pondered her words for a while, and then suddenly, Annabelle stood up and shook her skirts.
“Well, I suppose I should get back to the boardinghouse and pack.”
Second Chance Brides (Texas Boardinghouse Brides 2) Page 27