by J. M. Madden
“But he may not get here till after your bedtime.”
Mercy scowled then clasped her hands together in front of her little chest. “Can I stay up late? Pleeeeeaase?”
With a resigned shake of her head, Lora agreed that she could, but the little girl was asleep on the floor in front of the TV by nine. When there was a knock on her door at ten, Lora crossed the room to look out of the security hole, then disabled the new alarm that the agency had installed while she’d been gone. As soon as Chad stepped in, she walked into his open arms, totally unable to help herself. Wrapping her arms around his waist, she finally let herself relax.
“I missed you,” she whispered.
Chad stroked her back and she felt none of the anxiety she used to. “I missed you too, baby.”
She pulled him into the house and re-engaged the alarm system. “Thank you for this, by the way.”
Chad grinned at her. “Like that, do you? Palmer picked it out for you and the man is a genius with that kind of stuff. It’ll work well for you. And give you peace of mind.”
Lora was suddenly attacked by nerves. “Can I get you something to drink or eat?”
Shaking his head, Chad crossed the room to stand over Mercy. “She tried to stay up?”
Lora nodded. “She thought she could do it, but she fell asleep an hour ago.”
“Can I carry her to bed?”
She nodded again and watched as he gathered her daughter into his strong arms. Mercy roused and smiled up at him. “Hi, Chad. I waited for you to get here. How’s Mr. Harper?”
Chad glanced over her head to Lora, but she shook her head. She hadn’t told Mercy anything about Harper, only that he’d been injured.
“He’s a strong man. I think he’ll be okay but it may take a while. And I’m sure the bear will help.”
Mercy blinked at him and nuzzled her head into his chest as he carried her down the hallway. After tucking her into bed, he followed Lora back into the living room and sighed as he settled onto her couch. Lora sat in the corner opposite from him. “How is he really?”
Chad shook his head and scrubbed a hand over his face. “I think he’ll be okay but it’s going to take a while. One bullet went down through his body and caused a lot of damage. Recoverable but significant. The second bullet hit his gun and shattered the scope. Glass embedded in his face and a couple of pieces went into his eyes. They did one surgery but I think they’re going to schedule another with a specialist. Something about his retina detaching. Not a good situation for a sniper.”
Lora frowned. “And he doesn’t have family?”
“Well, a woman showed up claiming to be his wife. And she seems really concerned about him. But it’s very odd. I’ve worked with him for a couple years now and he’s never said anything about any family.”
“That’s really sad. If he needs anything please let me know. I feel very guilty that he got hurt watching us.”
Chad shrugged. “It’s part of the job. He knew that.”
He reached out to play with her fingers. “And how are you doing? Settling in?”
She nodded. “Flynn and Rachel were here for a day, but I sent them away once I got the hang of the security system. Rachel stopped by yesterday just to check on us. We have plans for lunch together next week. I think Mercy can tell a difference, too. We’re going to be okay.”
Scoffing, he tightened his fingers on her own. “Of course you are. I have no worries about that.”
Lora pulled his hand into her lap. “I still want to see you, though.”
He cocked a dark brow at her. “Well, you’re not likely to get rid of me in the near future.”
Warmth filled her chest at his words and she smiled, then dared to lean forward and press a kiss to his lips.
His bright eyes flashed and when she would have pulled away, he cupped her head and kissed her deeper. Lora didn’t mind. Actually, she relished the contact and flirted with the idea of inviting him to her room.
When he didn’t immediately release her from the kiss, the idea grew. She’d missed him a lot over the few days they’d been apart. Flashes of what they’d done lying in bed days ago flashed through her mind, ramping up her arousal. One of Chad’s broad hands brushed her nipple and she froze, relishing the hot need that slammed into her.
Chad pulled back, thinking she’d stilled for another reason, but she grabbed his hand as he started to pull away. “No, don’t stop, I just wanted to bask in what you stir in me. I can’t believe I’m not freaking out at your touch. I love it.”
He grinned, his eyes creasing with his laughter. “Glad I don’t repulse you.”
Cringing, she stroked his cheek again. “I don’t mean it like that. You know that.”
Chad stilled in front of her. “I know, Lora. And I don’t mean to make light of the situation. It’s just that I can hardly breathe for wanting you. And I’m nervous.”
The thought of the tall, self-contained man in front of her being anxious about her, about them, made her pause. She’d never held that kind of power over a man before and she felt lacking. He needed a woman that could meet him step for step.
No, you need to be the woman he needs.
Lora didn’t know where she got the strength to take his hand from her own, tug him up from the couch, then down the hallway behind her. Maybe it was the incredible anticipation that had built in her body as she’d waited for him to arrive. Maybe it was the simple desire to be looked at as a strong, vital woman again, rather than a female that needed taken care of. The thought of a future Mercy being in the same situation made her pray to know how to pass on this tenuous strength, so that her daughter would never find herself in the position of having to fight back from this somber place Lora found herself in.
Shoving as much of the crap she could behind the doors to her soul, she glanced over her shoulder. Chad was gorgeous. Though he seemed tired from driving and worry, his eyes were creased with that inner charm that had appealed to her at first. His hair was mussed and had grown in the month that she’d known him, but the curls looked good with his lean face. But what made him most spectacular was the way his expression lit up when he looked at her. He grinned as he followed her.
As they crossed the threshold to her pale blue bedroom, she had the slightest hesitation that the two of them together would bring back flashbacks, but she pushed through it. She had forced herself to sleep in the room for the past three nights, and she hadn’t had any issues. If she dreamt of anything, it was Derek keeling over on that mountainside, the bloody tree limb in her hands. She usually woke then, not because she was scared, but because she was amazed at what she’d done.
Chad glanced around the room. “Are you sure…”
Instead of answering him, Lora slipped her sweater from her shoulders and tossed it aside. Then, reaching for the buttons on her blouse, she popped them, one by one until the sides of her shirt draped her. As she moved to shrug it away as well, Chad stilled her. “Please,” he rumbled. “Let me.”
Lora let her hands hang to her sides and let him do what he wanted.
Chad’s lean fingers traced from her upper chest down, pushing the edges of the shirt wide as he went toward her breasts. They caught on the cups of her bra, then jumped over them to trace down her torso. Reaching back up to her shoulders, he lifted the yoke of the shirt and let it fall down her back.
Lora shivered, but not from fear. He looked at her as if she were his sun; as if he would die without her. His movements stilled and she looked up into his face, shocked to see his eyes glistening with tears.
“I don’t want to hurt you, Lora. You’ve been through so much and I’m willing to wait. We don’t have to do this tonight.”
Daring to reach out and cup the erection she could see through his heavy jeans, she stepped closer. “You won’t hurt me, Chad. I won’t let you.”
Grinning through his worry, he dropped a kiss to her mouth. “I love you, Lora. And your courageous heart.”
Tears choked her then and s
he had to wrap herself around him. “You helped me find my courageous heart and I can’t thank you enough for that. I want you to love me, Chad. And I want to love you back.”
She reached out and brushed her hands over his broad shoulders, then down the front of his shirt. His buttons released easily. As she tugged the shirttails from the waistband of his jeans, he cupped her elbows in his hands. Gathering her hands in his, he held them clasped in his own and pressed a kiss to the knot of their fingers. “You’re supposed to be letting me do this,” he reminded her.
Lora grinned. “Then get to it.”
Reaching around behind her, he found the hooks to her bra and released them, one at a time, slowly. Lora tipped up her chin and concentrated on not moving. Her hands came to rest on his sides and she tightened her fingers convulsively as the last hook released and he started to tug the straps down her shoulders. When her breasts felt the cool air, they puckered even more than they already were. Tossing the bra toward the corner, he reached out with both hands to cup her breasts, sweeping his thumbs over the nipples. Lora closed her eyes, savoring the rush of heat that swept through her. God, he felt good. Even the scars on his left hand provided a texture that caught on the tip of her breast, rasping.
Lora’s knees wavered and she had to focus enough to stand firm. “You better hurry, Chad. I can’t stand much longer.”
The words had barely left her mouth when he was on his knees in front of her. Agile fingers reached for the waistband of her pants, tugging to unfasten the button and roll down the zipper. Lora shuddered as he swept her pants down over the swell of her hips. For the first time, anxiety crept in. She was not perfect, by any means. And if there was one area of her body she was self-conscious of, it was the area of her belly that had expanded with pregnancy. For the most part, it had retightened, but she’d been left with silver stretch marks. Unable to help herself, she rested her hand over her belly.
Chad looked up at her, blue eyes shining in the light of the bedside lamp. “Seriously? You think I’m going to begrudge you some marks? They gave you Mercy. How can you be ashamed of those?”
She blinked and realized he was completely right. They had given her an amazing little girl. Her hands fell to his head and she smoothed her fingers over the curls.
Chad urged her to step out of her pants and socks and when she stood bare before him, he reached up to tangle his fingers in the pale swirling hair at her sex. “You’re so damn beautiful.”
Pushing to his feet, he cupped her head in his hands and rested his mouth on hers, moving his lips slowly back and forth. When his tongue slipped out to nudge at the seam of her lips, she allowed him in, surging against him greedily. Her breasts were tight against his chest, but she didn’t mind. Allowing her hands to wander down his body, she went after his jeans button again. “You are overdressed.”
Grinning against her mouth, he pulled away and held his hands up innocently. “What are you going to do about it?”
She attacked the fastening with a vengeance, popping the button and dragging the zipper down forcefully enough that his body shifted with her movements. She made the same movement he had, sweeping her hands inside the waistband and down over his taut backside, pushing the pants down over his hips. “Sit down.”
Turning, he dropped to the edge of the mattress. She worked his jeans down as far as they would go around his calves, revealing the prosthesis on his left leg. “Tell me how to take this off.”
The fun and charm was suddenly gone from his expression, leaving only narrow-eyed watchfulness. He lifted his left leg to her. “Just pull on the boot. It will unseal, then you roll the sock down and off.”
She did as he instructed and set the piece of equipment to the side, then tugged off his second boot. She tossed his jeans to the side then tugged on the tube sock of his right foot. Unable to help herself, she dragged her fingernails along the sole of his foot as she peeled it off. With a yelp, he jerked his foot away. “What the hell was that for?”
Lora grinned, thrilled to have found a chink in his put-together armor. “Just checking.”
Chad laughed and lifted her up to kneel before him, dropping a kiss to her nose. “I give you fair warning. If you do that again, I’ll have to retaliate.”
She widened her eyes. “Oh, no. How would you do that?”
He frowned at her and lifted one brow dramatically. “Maybe I will eat you out until you scream maraschino cherry.”
The play waned at the thought of him doing that to her, and the playfulness left his face as well. Her breathing accelerated.
“I want you to do that anyway.”
The words had barely left her mouth when he switched their positions, carefully, gently. Kneeling in front of her, he wedged himself between her knees, then pressed carefully against her chest. Stretching out on the mattress, anticipation darted through her. She looked down the length of her body, trying to memorize every sensation.
Chad looked up at her with hooded eyes, his broad hands cupping her breasts. As she watched him, he plumped them together for a quick kiss, then swooped his hands into the hollow of her waist. He spanned them against her and brushed over the swell of her belly to the pale hair he’d teased earlier. With a single finger, he drew curlicues against the sensitive skin, moving closer and closer to her moist heat.
Lora shifted her hips, trying to get him to move there more quickly, but he apparently had a plan in mind. Snugging his nose into her pubic bone, he breathed the scent of her deep. If he hadn’t glanced up at her just then, with pure sex in his eyes, she’d have freaked. But instead, she took a deep breath and held on.
Chad knew his way around a woman’s body. Lora should have known he’d be wonderful at this. He was wonderful at everything he did. Her legs fell open and her body twitched as he ran his tongue from top to bottom of her slit, moaning against her. Lora felt her body loosen even more at his obvious enjoyment. Shifting beneath his mouth, she allowed her enjoyment free rein, not worried about anything other than the pleasure that was building in her.
“Oh, hell,” she moaned, rolling her pelvis up.
Chad slid both hands beneath her ass and tilted her into his touch. Lora began to pant, because he was right there where she needed him. Yes, right there. Right there.
The orgasm that crashed into her was more visceral than any other she’d ever had. For a long, drawn out moment, time stilled, then slammed past her. She gasped and arched on the bed, tears trailing down her temples and into her hair as wave after swell of hedonistic joy shuddered through her. Chad eased his touch, but continued to press open kisses to her body as the pleasure plateaued then eased.
When he finally pulled away from her body, she continued to spasm deliciously, deep in the center of her body. Her eyes fluttered open.
Chad still knelt on the floor beside the bed, between her knees, but his shoulders moved up and down as if he had run a race. Lora sat up and leaned toward him, tilting his chin up with her hand. “I’ve never…”
Her voice trailed off and she shook her head, because there were no words to express what she was feeling. Or maybe there were just too many. She felt awed, appreciative, decadent, guilty, satisfied.
Loving.
As she looked down his body and realized how achingly hard he was, flexing with every harsh breath, she had a moment’s worry. Men in this state could be rough. But as her eyes lifted and connected to his, the worry drifted away. Chad Lowell would never hurt her. That certainty settled into her bones.
“I want you to make love to me now,” she whispered.
Chad’s harshly restrained face crumpled into need as he allowed her to guide him into the bed. When he opened his mouth to protest, she pressed her fingers to his lips. “We’ll go slow. And if anything doesn’t feel right, I’ll stop.”
“And I will too,” he promised. “No matter where we are or how close I am, I will stop.”
She smiled through misty eyes. “I know you will. I have no doubts about that.”
&n
bsp; Lora laid down on the mattress and held her arms out to him, but he shook his head. Lying down beside her, he pressed a lingering kiss to her lips. “First time is all you baby. Show me your best cowgirl impression.”
Laughing in delight, she pushed to her knees, then slipped one leg over his lean hips. She knew he was doing this for her comfort, not his, but she appreciated it. His cock flexed toward her, as if it knew that relief was near. Lora lowered her weight to Chad’s thighs, below his groin and cupped his erection in her hands. Several nights ago she’d masturbated him to completion, and the knowledge that she could do that at any time pleased her greatly. If things did fall through and she freaked out, she could… No. That wasn’t going to happen.
Lifting her foot to rest beside his hip, she opened herself for him, lifted, and sank down. For several long seconds, she stayed where she was, waiting for panic to shatter the moment. It never happened. Instead, her body shifted down against his tighter, closer, widening to accept him.
“Can I hold your hips?” he gasped.
Lora nodded, too caught up in the sensations to answer him any other way. Strong, lean fingers gripped her hips, with the thumbs teasing just above the cleft where they were joined. But he didn’t make her move. He just held her and allowed her to make the next move.
Seated as deeply as he was inside her, Lora felt every heartbeat that quivered down his shaft. Lifting her hips, she paused at the tip, almost releasing him, then glided back down. Oh, god. She repeated the maneuver until she was riding him, with no pauses between. That felt…sublime. She sped up, losing focus of everything around her except the building need that had to be met. The first orgasm he’d given her had been amazing, but this one felt like it would be truly awe-inspiring.
Chad gasped beneath her and she felt his hands move up her body to cup her bouncing breasts. Lora moaned, curling her body tighter against his as that brilliant need flared brighter. The sound of their skin slapping together was as sexy as anything she’d ever heard before, but she needed something more. Chad lifted his hips and braced, his need as great as her own, and she had that extra little something she needed. A sensation unlike any other made her cry out, arching on top of him, the orgasm slamming through her till she thought she would splinter apart. Chad groaned beneath her. His hands left her breasts to grip her hips again, bowing up as if to seat himself as deeply as he could as his climax overtook him. Lora felt his ejaculation surge inside her and he cried out, every muscle straining across his chest as the orgasm played out.