by Nola Cross
Holy crap. She was about to make love with Hawk. Things were about to get very real. This was a whole different scenario than the morning she’d pleasured him in the recliner. Then he’d had his hands in bandages and was almost helpless. She’d been the one in control and had enjoyed the sensation. She could draw the boundaries, take things as far as she wanted and stop if she got scared. Tonight, he would be the one with all the experience, all the power.
She glanced sideways at him, thinking again how fantastic he looked in his suit, with the shiny strands of his ponytail laying over one shoulder. Used to seeing him in his casual clothes, it struck her all of a sudden that she didn’t know this more sophisticated side of him at all. She’d spent a week under his roof, but he’d been hurt and drugged for most of that time. Now the tiger was out of the cage.
Would he be gentle with her? Or rough and demanding? Who was he, really?
Chapter 21
Hawk shrugged out of his suit coat and hung it over the back of the desk chair. Then he reached out his hand. “Let me take your scarf,” he said, giving her an encouraging smile.
Ever since she’d gotten into the car with him she’d had that deer-in-the-headlights expression on her face. She’d relaxed somewhat on the drive there, even laughing when he’d done his Nurse Sarah imitation, but now she looked scared again.
Maybe this wasn’t such a great idea after all. It wasn’t too late to call the whole thing off. He’d never been the kind of guy who pushed a woman into doing something she wasn’t ready to do.
But that was the thing. Desi had been pretty clear that she was ready. He let his thoughts flick back to that morning last month and the sweet, eager heat of her lips on his cock. If not for his bandages, they’d have had full-on sex at that time, so why not now? Especially since he was already halfway aroused just being near her.
Besides, he owed her. And he couldn’t wait to even up things between them.
What could he do to help her relax?
He thought about the little flask of liquid courage in his suitcase, but decided that getting her drunk wasn’t what he was going for either.
She took off her scarf and he laid it over his suit jacket. Then he turned on the TV and found a satellite radio station playing smooth jazz. All the while she stood next to the bed with her hands clasped together, looking a little bit lost. Chances were she had no idea that when she held her hands that way it only accentuated the shadowed invitation of her cleavage. His slacks tightened and he forced himself to look her in the eye.
“Should I get us a Coke?” he asked.
“That would be nice.”
“I’ll be right back.” He grabbed the ice bucket and went out into the hall, finding the vending machines near the elevator.
When he got back to the room, she had taken a seat in one of the two gray arm chairs and was looking out the window. From the third floor room, they could see the approach to the Portland airport’s north runway. A mid-sized passenger jet was just about to touch down, its lights blinking in the inky darkness.
“This is great,” she said, turning to smile at him. “I’ve always liked watching planes land and take off.”
“Really?” He never would have guessed that about her. “Next time you’re in Tacoma we can check out the Sea-Tac airport. The big boys land there, the 747s and even the new A380s.”
“I’ve never seen an A380. That would be awesome.”
Damn! Had he just invited her to come back to his place again? The old programming kicked in, making him want to backpedal as fast as he could. His pulse raced as he felt the proverbial noose begin to tighten round his neck. He didn’t do relationships—he sucked at them.
“When I was a little girl—before you and your mom moved in—I remember my dad taking me to watch the planes. We’d buy cheeseburgers and shakes and park in that visitor’s lot along Marine Drive where we could see the whole runway. Sometimes he let me sit on the hood of the car.” She chuckled, her face lightening.
What was it Jordan had said this morning about good women and love? The exact conversation was all kind of foggy now. Whatever he’d said though had spurred Hawk to get in his car and come here today, so it must have been epic. And if a middle-aged, cantankerous, former cokehead could learn how to relax and let love in, maybe there was hope for him as well.
He cleared his throat and went to the wall switch. “Let me dim the light so you can see outside better.” He adjusted the dial, leaving the room in half-light.
“That’s good. Thanks,” she murmured.
He pulled the tab on one can of Coke, poured it over ice and handed her the glass.
“Thanks. Again.” She gave him another nervous smile and turned back toward the window.
His pulse began to settle. It appeared she wasn’t going to make a big deal out of his inadvertent invitation. The last thing he wanted to do was lead her on. Yes, he’d discovered he had deepening feelings for Dez, but he wasn’t ready by a long shot to make any promises to her. This thing they were doing tonight was sort of an experiment, a first step. Nothing more. She understood that, right?
“Desi?”
“Hmm?” She swiveled back toward him.
Now would be the time to say something to let her know there were no promises intended. But try as he might, the words wouldn’t come.
“Would you like to dance?” Oh, shit. Now where did that come from?
“Here?”
“Sure. We got a little Kenny G on the radio. Perfect for slow dancing.”
“I’m not much of a dancer,” she said, ducking her head.
It was on the tip of his tongue to point out that she’d been doing a credible job of it at the engagement party with Pretty Boy Paul, but he bit back his words. Instead he walked to her and held out his hand. She set her glass down and stood up and moved into his arms.
Aside from that day in his kitchen, before he found out how inexperienced she was, it was the first time he had held her this way. His senses were overwhelmed with all there was to take in. As they fell into a simple shuffling step together, he marveled at the way her body fit like a glove against his. The points of her soft breasts pressed just below his pectorals, and his groin brushed her belly. Their legs moved together in unison. If he had wondered before, now he knew for sure that she was in great shape. He could feel the smooth, firm muscles of her thighs beneath the gray dress.
She sighed and laid her head against his chest, her hair tickling his chin. He could smell her distinctive powdery scent, the fragrance he’d come to associate with her. He’d never thought of the smell as sexy before she’d come back into his life. Now he kissed the top of her head and let his lips linger there, breathing her in.
The back of her dress was cut low, and he shifted his hand upward until it lay on her naked skin. He stroked her there, his fingertips relishing the warm, satiny texture. The low moan of Kenny G’s sax filled the room and the light of the TV flickered over them as they danced. They rocked back and forth together, not changing position, for perhaps five minutes. Kenny gave way to Michael Lington and gradually Desi relaxed in his arms.
She drew back again and sent him a shy smile. “Have you ever wished you could play the sax like these guys?”
“That would be very cool. Have you?”
“I took guitar lessons one summer. I think I learned a whopping five chords.” She laughed, and her breasts jiggled against his chest, causing all kinds of chaos below his belt.
Seeming oblivious to his aroused state, she laid her head down again and began to hum along with a well-known Dave Koz tune. In the week she’d spent with him, she’d never mentioned being a jazz fan. What else didn’t he know about her?
The longer they danced, lost in one sinuous tune after the next, the more fluid her movements became. It seemed to him as if they were now moving as one. And when she lifted her head again to say something, he simply covered her lips with his.
She tasted of Coke, but the sweetness could have been all Desi
herself. Her mouth moved against his, hesitating and then going slack as he ran his tongue along the seam of her ripe lips. She made a tiny, kittenish noise and opened for him. The sound arrowed straight to his groin, making him even harder as he thrust his tongue inside.
So warm. So wet. He swirled his tongue against hers, inviting her to play. After a moment her tongue slid along his, slick and smooth, and began a tentative exploration of his mouth. Another whimper rose from her throat.
Until that moment he’d managed to keep it all together. But there was something about the helpless little sounds she made that stirred a more primal response. He shoved his fingers deep into her hair, holding her head in place while he plundered her mouth. Over and over he dipped his tongue between her lips, taking his fill of her. She seemed to melt against him, her body going almost limp as she clung to him, kissing him back.
Keeping his left hand locked in her hair, he stroked his right hand down her arm and then cupped her breast, massaging her flesh through the soft fabric of her dress. It didn’t seem as though she was wearing a bra; the firm nub of her nipple pushed against the satin, and he was overcome with the desire to taste her there. It took just a tug or two and the thin strap of the dress fell down her arm, allowing the bodice to gap open, giving him easy access to the plump, warm treasure inside. He filled his hand, running his thumb nail back and forth across her nipple, never breaking their heated kiss.
* * * *
Desi wanted to dissolve into the waves of exquisite sensation washing over her. Her nipple throbbed with pleasure as Hawk’s fingers explored inside her dress. She leaned away to give him better access and he seemed to understand. His grip in her hair tightened, sending delicious spikes of pleasure down her spine. With each tug on her sensitive scalp, she felt more and more like a helpless marionette, dancing to the call of her own desires and completely at his masculine command. All the while, his mouth made demands on hers, and a glorious heat began to build between her thighs. It was almost impossible to keep quiet. Every time she whimpered she could feel his erection stir against her belly.
Their feet had stopped moving, but Dave Koz played on, the mournful notes swirling around them. The other strap of her dress drooped low on her arm and then somehow he was easing the loosened top of her dress down to her waist. Heat rippled over her as he stood back and took in her naked breasts.
“You’re perfect.” His dark gaze devoured her.
“Th-thank you.” She couldn’t seem to meet his eyes.
No sooner were the words out of her mouth than he had taken one breast in each big hand, stroking, exploring, plucking at her nipples until she thought she might collapse. His scarred palms and work-roughened fingertips made amazing sensations dance over her skin, delicious and intense, taking her someplace she’d never been before. Emboldened, she dug her fingers into his upper arms and thrust her chest forward as he bent low and took one nipple into his mouth.
Hot, wet, and insistent, his pliant lips sucked the swollen tip of her breast. Desi moaned and let her eyelids drift closed, reveling in each searing pull. Who could have guessed how responsive her nipples were? She’d done some petting in the past, but that guy had been woefully inexperienced. His fumbling attempts had left her embarrassed rather than aroused. But Hawk knew just what to do with his mouth. As he used the edge of his teeth to graze her flesh in a playful nip her knees buckled.
“Can we lie down now?” she said, her head swirling.
He guided her backward until her calves nudged the quilted duvet then eased her down on the bed. She lay there staring at him as he unbuttoned his dress shirt and shrugged out it, revealing the tanned perfection of his chest and arms. A thrill of anticipation moved through her. This time she wasn’t his nurse; she would get to touch him in the way she longed to, with her hands and her lips. How would his nipples taste?
He moved in close at the end of the bed and touched her knee, then ran his hand up her thigh, dragging the skirt of her dress to her waist. She fought the urge to cover her lower body, schooling herself to lie still. Only an inexperienced ninny would put her hands over her crotch, right?
She hadn’t worn stockings, and his touch left a tingling trail along her skin as he fingered the lacey edge of her bikini panties.
“Pretty,” he murmured, dipping one finger under the elastic band.
Desi sucked in a quick breath.
“Aren’t you going to lie down too?” She felt so self-conscious, the way he stood over her, appraising her body with that appreciative male stare.
“In a minute. There’s no hurry.”
He grinned then, transforming his face for a moment into the easygoing Hawk she knew best. She began to relax a little. His thumbs hooked under the leg bands of her panties and pulled them down her thighs. She gasped as he tossed the little wad of lace and satin onto the gray chair.
“We won’t need those again anytime soon.” He gave her an exaggerated wink.
* * * *
She was even lovelier than he had imagined, and he could tell she didn’t have a clue about that. In the dim room the shadows fell across her thighs and breasts in intriguing patterns of dark and light, mysterious hills and scented valleys that were distinctly Desiree. Part of him wished he could turn the lights on again so he could see every succulent detail, but she’d freak out for sure if he rushed her.
He grasped her knees and stroked both hands up her firm thighs again until he came to the apex. He let his thumbs graze the patch of dusky curls there. She gasped, her amber eyes opening wide as she stared into his face. He trailed his fingertips along the silky skin that bordered her mound, teasing and caressing until she gasped again.
“Oh, Hawk!” Her voice trembled.
His cock jumped in response. The wait was killing him. He was more than ready to plunge into her fragrant heat. But he reminded himself this was her first time. And this was Desi, someone he’d cared about forever. Someone he loved. If ever restraint was called for, it was now.
“What is it, babe?”
“I want—I want—” Her head moved restlessly on the bed.
He skimmed his hand over her curls again, letting one finger dip into the inviting cleft. “Open for me, Desiree,” he whispered.
She hesitated, then closed her eyes and let her knees fall apart. With a gentle nudge he coaxed her legs wider, revealing all of her feminine beauty.
He couldn’t have explained in that moment what made her so special; he only knew he’d never seen anything as sexy. Her scent rose, betraying her arousal, and he dipped his head and tasted her.
The sweet, dark tang of her body was like nothing he had experienced before. When she writhed beneath him he put his hands on her inner thighs to hold her still, to open her more to his lips and tongue. As he took his time exploring each delectable fold and crevice, heightening her arousal bit by bit, she let out a series of helpless whimpers. At last he discovered her hidden bud and teased it out, sucking and nipping as her hands clenched in his hair.
“You like that, Dez?”
She didn’t need to answer; her hips rose toward him in a wanton invitation. “Oh, don’t stop,” she moaned. “Please don’t stop.”
Was she ready for him? He dipped his finger into her opening, finding her inner walls slick and welcoming. He added a second finger. As he teased in and out, she gave a frustrated cry and ground herself against his hand. She’d finally let go of the last bit of self-consciousness, and he found the noisy passion of her surrender intoxicating.
He’d never wanted a woman more than he wanted Desiree at that moment. His whole body seemed to vibrate with his need for her. But he shoved aside his own desires, focusing all his attention on making the experience perfect for her. It was clear that she was fully aroused, and when he tweaked her swollen bud again he sensed the riveting tension building even higher in her body.
“Let go, baby,” he crooned, flicking the little button.
“Oh! Oh yes!”
Seconds later her vaginal
walls contracted around his fingers and her hands tightened in his hair. She cried out his name as she rode his hand to completion, all self-consciousness banished, her beautiful face contorted with intense concentration.
He stood there motionless, bent over her body, allowing the waves of her orgasm to settle before he moved his hand from between her thighs. At last she opened her eyes and looked at him, giving him a shy smile.
“I didn’t mean to be—”
“Shhh.” He touched his finger to her lips. “You were perfect, Dez. Perfect.”
He kissed her, his mouth gentle but insistent on hers, letting her know how desirable she was, how much he wanted her. She moaned and opened her lips, and he thrust his tongue inside, making promises of what was to come.
Then he stood away and took a foil packet from the pocket of his slacks. He unzipped them, letting them puddle on the floor. His boxers followed and he kicked them aside. As Desi watched with heavy lids, he rolled the condom on and came back to stand at the end of the bed.
“Are you ready for me?” he asked.
She stared at his erect cock, an expression of concern and interest blending on her features. After a moment she nodded and he bent and slipped his hands under her body, bringing her hips up to meet his.
“Put your legs around my waist.”
She did as he instructed. With her ankles locked around him he tipped her pelvis, hesitating, letting the tip of his cock just nudge her entrance. Then he eased his way in, watching her face for signs of strain. As her wet warmth surrounded him, it took every bit of his self-control not to plunge full-depth into her body.
“How’s that? Okay? No pain?”
“No, no pain.” She had tensed a little but now she gave him a brief smile and seemed to relax as he eased back out and then slid inside her once again.
He’d half-expected to encounter some resistance, but there seemed to be no barrier to breach. Bracing his legs further apart, he lifted her pelvis more snugly against him, marveling at the way her silky ass cheeks filled his hands. He stared down at the place where their bodies joined, watching his cock disappear between her soft, wet folds and then emerge again.