I dropped the fork I’d been holding and turned around to face him. “Uh, I don’t know about that. Marriage seems kind of sudden. I’m not even looking to get married.”
His eyes narrowed, and he stepped toward me, his much taller stature dwarfing my own. “What do you mean you don’t know about that? Nick wants to marry you. That’s all you need to know. I say you need to get married, so you will. I don’t give a shit if you were looking to get married or not.”
I shook my head, fear making me dizzy. “I meant Nick doesn’t even know me, Liam. Shouldn’t we have a few dates and get to know each other better?” I squeaked. “I’m sure I would feel better about it if I got to know him. You know I’ve never dated much. I need time.”
He stared me down, trying to intimidate me, and it proved effective. “I know Nick and I know you. He’s perfect for you. You need a strong man to keep you in line. He’ll provide a roof over your head and keep food on the table. See, you don’t need to worry about getting a job. Nick will take care of you. Besides, he’s going to want his own son, and you can’t work when you’re pregnant.”
Bile was rising in the back of my throat. Everything was wrong. Liam was crazy if he thought I would let myself get pregnant. There was no way I wanted Nick’s children. I didn’t want Nick. In fact, even the thought of sex with him terrified me. Liam had an archaic view of a woman’s place in the world. I blamed the men who had essentially raised him while our dad had been locked up. They’d been old-school, mean men who wanted their women barefoot and in the kitchen. Their old ladies were meant to be tough, but only to other women. Around men, they were to be seen and not heard. In their eyes, women were ornaments for their bikes and warm bodies in their beds.
“I would like to go out with him again. Maybe he and I can talk about this,” I said, my voice cracking. I was hoping to put off a quickie marriage that would trap me in this life forever.
Liam relaxed and took a step back. “I’ll tell him you’re interested and want to go out. Don’t be a bitch to him. I’m not going to change my mind about this, and if you don’t treat him right, I’ll find out,” he warned.
I nodded, my heartrate slowing with the removal of the immediate threat. “I wasn’t a bitch to him last time. You can’t expect me to marry a man I don’t know.”
“I told you, I know him. That’s good enough.”
I sighed. There was no sense in trying because I would never get through to him. He had been thoroughly brainwashed and was convinced his way of thinking was the only way. There were days I remembered and missed the Liam from long ago. He had always been a protective older brother. I used to love it. Things started to change when he got to high school. My fun and loving brother slowly faded away, and in his place emerged the monster standing before me. It was why my mother had basically run away from home. She hadn’t been able to stand what was happening to my brother. When she broke her hip, it was her ticket out of the house. She never came back and was now claiming to be disabled, which got her the state funding to stay in the nursing home.
“Fine, Liam,” I muttered, not wanting to argue anymore. It was futile. Liam didn’t take no for an answer—ever.
“This is a good thing, Chelle. You need a husband. You’re too old to be living in my house. Besides, Joey needs a father.” He walked back to his room. “Quit being stubborn and just listen to me. I know what’s best for you,” he said, slamming the door behind him.
I wanted to puke. Nick was not a good father figure. He would lead Joey right into the gang with his uncle. It was already hard enough to keep Joey from idolizing everything the guys did. I had a feeling Nick would push the issue and my voice would be silenced either way. I could not let that happen to my child. I wouldn’t. If Liam pressed the marriage issue, I would have to find a way out. I didn’t know what that would be, but I had to do something.
Doing my best to distract myself from Liam’s news, I finished making cookies and cleaned up the mess he had left. He came back into the kitchen, giving me a strange look. For a brief second, I saw a glimpse of the old Liam and wanted to run into his arms and welcome him back. But the softness was gone in an instant.
“What?” I snapped.
Liam had me under his thumb most of the time, but occasionally I snapped back. I wasn’t a complete pushover, or so I liked to think.
“What’s with you lately?” he snarled.
“What are you talking about?”
“You and this talk about wanting a job. Are you trying to plan something?” he asked in a low voice. “I’m your family. I’m taking care of you and Joey.”
“No! Liam, I want a job to keep busy. I’d like to be able to buy my son things he wants sometimes. I want to buy him new clothes. I want to have my own money and shop when I want without asking you. You’re my brother, Liam. It isn’t normal for you to support me. We live in the twenty-first century. Women work and take care of their families. I can do both. I won’t neglect my duties here or to Joey,” I said, being as rational as I could when I was feeling anything but.
“I give you money all the time, and I already buy Joey new clothes. He doesn’t need those stupid video games. He’s too young for that stuff,” he said.
I rolled my eyes with my back to him. As if Liam knew anything about raising a child. He wasn’t going to listen to me. After all, in his eyes, I was just a woman and subject to his authority.
“It was only a thought,” I said, not wanting to argue and risk pissing him off.
Liam could be volatile, and the last thing I wanted to do was incite his anger. He’d throw a tantrum and trash the house, leaving me to clean it up before Joey got home and saw the havoc. I felt like I was constantly on guard, protecting my son from seeing and hearing things that were far too adult for him. I wanted to protect his childhood innocence as long as I could, but every day it got a little harder.
“Leave the thinking to me. I’ve got you’re back, Chelle. I’ll make sure to find you a man to take care of you. Relax and go get your nails done or something. Buy something new to wear for your date with Nick,” he said, putting a hundred-dollar bill on the counter.
Looking up at him, I saw the huge wad of cash in his hand and had the stark realization that my brother was a very bad and dangerous man.
“Thanks,” I murmured, sliding the money into my pocket.
An idea was forming in my mind. I could pick up something nice that looked like it cost a hundred bucks for twenty at the Goodwill. I would hide the rest and slowly build up a little nest egg. If and when Liam forced the marriage to Nick, I would have a way out.
6
Elijah
By now, I had been watching and stalking Liam for almost a week and felt confident I had his routine down. He was into some heavy shit judging by the places he visited. I hadn’t seen or heard from Michelle. Either Rayne kept her promise not to tell the Bennett family I was in town or Michelle didn’t want to see me. I couldn’t believe the latter.
It had been long enough. I needed to see Michelle. Her brother would be busy making his usual deliveries, and that would give me a little time to talk with her.
I strolled into the diner, hoping Rayne was working. I glanced around and spotted her blonde head, her back to me as she poured coffee into a cup.
“Rayne,” I said, making her jump.
She spun around to look at me. “You’re still here?” she asked, surprise in her voice.
“I am.”
She sighed. “I didn’t tell anyone.”
“I know. Do you have a minute?”
She looked irritated by my presence but finally nodded her head and pointed to a table by the window. “Sit there.”
I did as she asked, leaving my sunglasses on in an attempt to disguise my appearance in case anyone I knew showed up.
Rayne brought me a glass of ice water and stood by my table, pretending to take my order. “What do you want?”
“I want to see her.”
“What?” she hissed. “I
thought you didn’t want her to know you were in town?”
I shrugged. “I changed my mind. Can you call her? Ask her to come to the diner?”
Rayne grimaced. “I don’t know. That could be risky.”
“I need to see her.”
She threw her head back, looking up at the dingy ceiling before looking back at me. “Fine.”
“Thanks, Rayne.”
She walked away, pulling a cell phone out of her back pocket. I wanted to believe she had agreed because she knew Michelle would want to see me. I had to trust she wasn’t going to call Liam. She’d kept my secret this long. I hoped she would keep it just a bit longer.
Rayne came back, bringing me a piece of pie. I looked up at her, questioning the pie. “If you’re going to be sitting here, you have to order something or my manager will throw you out of here.”
“Thanks. Did you call her?”
She let out a long sigh as if she had done something physically taxing. “Yes, but I didn’t tell her you were here. Give her half an hour or so. Nurse that pie,” she ordered before walking away.
I grinned. She could pretend to be mad, but I knew she was happy to finally get her secret out in the open. I took a bite of the apple pie, wincing at the tartness that took away any concern that I’d finish it too soon.
After a while, I looked at the clock. It had only been fifteen minutes. It had been too long since I’d seen her. I’d imagined this moment so many times in my head, but I had no idea how I would react when it happened for real. Would she look the same? Would she be happy to see me?
It didn’t matter. Whether she wanted me or had moved on, I was going to do what I’d come back to LA to accomplish.
Another twenty minutes went by, and then I felt a warm breeze. Looking at the door, I saw the most beautiful woman in the world. I couldn’t draw a breath. I had tunnel vision and couldn’t look away.
When she pulled off her sunglasses, I removed mine, not wanting anything between us when our eyes met for the first time in eight years.
She walked inside the diner, her eyes moving around, probably looking for Rayne. I held my breath, knowing I was going to fall into her line of sight at any moment. I watched her walk toward the counter and then come to an immediate halt, her eyes locking with mine.
The rest of the diner faded from view as I looked into those gorgeous brown eyes.
“Elijah?” My name was a harsh whisper on her lips.
I stared at the lines around her eyes and the dark circles underneath. I wanted nothing more than to wrap her in my arms and offer comfort. She was gorgeous. There was no denying that. However, I could sense a sadness about her, a weariness in the way she moved, as if she had lost that spark I’d loved so much.
“Michelle,” I said, watching her stare at me, her eyes moving over my face as if she needed to be sure it was really me.
“Elijah!” Her voice was loud and high.
I nodded my head without getting up from my seat, waiting for her to come to me. “It’s me,” I said, my eyes drinking in the sight of her. It had been too long.
Rayne appeared out of nowhere, grabbing Michelle’s arm and dragging her away. Michelle turned her head to stare at me. I stood, ready to follow Michelle anywhere, and took long strides to close the distance between us, needing to be near her.
“Back up,” Rayne hissed. “You two are drawing too much attention. Sit down and keep your voices down. You never know who might know Liam.”
“You knew?” Michelle hissed. “How long have you known?” She was whisper-shouting at Rayne as the three of us moved toward the back of the diner.
I could feel eyes on us from the staff and the few diners populating the tables. A public reunion had probably not been the best idea. Of course seeing each other after so many years would be explosive.
Rayne led us to a back corner that was somewhat hidden by the kitchen entrance. I slid into the booth, watching Michelle as she sat, studying every curve and remembering the night I had gotten to hold her in my arms. In many ways she looked the same, but there were subtle differences as well. She was a little curvier and had the face of a woman who had seen too much.
“You’re here,” Michelle whispered, her eyes locked on mine.
I nodded. “I’m here.”
“What are you doing?”
I shrugged a shoulder, not ready to tell her the truth behind my return. I didn’t need to add to her stress. “Figured it was time for a visit.”
She had known when I was lying back then, and she did now as well. “Elijah, you can’t be here. Don’t do this,” she begged.
“I can be anywhere I want. I’ve haven’t done anything.”
“You know what I mean,” she said, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. “We both know why you’re back here. You can’t be here. It’s too dangerous.”
“I needed to see you,” I told her, meaning every word, fighting the urge to reach across the table and stroke her cheek. “I don’t care about the danger.”
Her eyes dropped down to stare at the tabletop. “You left town and never looked back. I didn’t know what happened. For so long I feared he had killed you.”
It felt as if I had been stabbed through the heart, hearing her soft voice so full of pain. I hated the way things had gone down but reaching out to her and letting her know I was alive—I knew it would have been wrong. She would have wanted to join me, and Liam would have hunted us down and killed us both. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind.
“I didn’t want to leave you. You know I had to. It wasn’t like I was given a choice, Michelle. I had to, for both of us. I would have never willingly left you. You have to know that.”
She gave a slight nod of her head. “I know.”
I hated to remind her of that night, but I needed her to know the only way I would have ever left her was under extreme circumstances. Nearly dying was pretty extreme. I had feared for her life as well as my own. Her brother was a monster. I had gone home and nursed my wounds, thinking long and hard about what to do. Leaving her had been the hardest thing I had ever done. I only left after a promise to myself that I would one day return to claim what was mine. She was mine.
“I don’t regret that night, not for a second,” I told her, needing her to know it had all been very real.
She looked up, understanding in her eyes. “I know. Neither do I. I’m glad you’re okay. I have thought about you so much, and I’m very glad to know you are alive and well.”
I smiled. “I’ve thought of nothing else but you.”
“Are you staying?” she asked.
I shrugged a shoulder.
The sound of a duck quacking threw me off. “What’s that?”
She groaned. “My phone.”
She pulled it out and answered it, clearly not happy with the caller. I listened to her side of the conversation. She had her mouth covered, trying to shield the background noise from the person on the other end of the phone.
“Fine. I said okay,” she mumbled into the phone before going silent. “Okay. I’m on my way,” she grumbled before hanging up.
I looked at her, hating that she was going to leave me when she had only just arrived.
“I have to go,” she mumbled.
“Why? Can’t you stay a little longer? There’s a lot I’d like to say,” I told her.
She looked at me, sorrow and regret in her eyes. “I can’t. You should go. Being here is not a good idea.”
“Was it him?” I asked.
She hesitated before nodding her head. “Yes. My brother needs me at home. I have to go. If I don’t show up, there will be consequences. I can’t sit here.”
My blood boiled at the thought of her still being under her brother’s control. It pissed me off she had never managed to break free of the prick.
“He doesn’t know where you are, does he?”
Her eyes widened. “No! He can never know!”
I nodded. “I understand. Please, Michelle, stay a little longer. I’ve m
issed you.”
“I can’t. This was a mistake. You should have never come back.”
Her words stung. My fantasy of seeing her and everything falling back into place evaporated before me.
“Michelle, I can help you.”
She looked at me, shaking her head. “No, you can’t. You’ll only make things worse. You need to go back to wherever it is you’ve been hiding. I have to go,” she said. She slid out of the booth and rushed out the door. I turned to watch her leave, staring out the window as she climbed into that old green Honda I had seen in front of the house.
It really hurt. I could admit it hurt to have her tell me to leave without giving me a second look.
“She’s right, you know,” Rayne said, interrupting my pity party. “You being here is only going to cause a lot of trouble for her and you. A lot has happened since you’ve been gone. Things aren’t the same. There’s a lot more at stake now. Take her advice. Just get out of town and don’t look back.”
I pushed my sunglasses back on before turning to look up at her. “I can’t do that, and she knows why. I’m not the same person I was either. I’m not afraid of Liam.”
She shook her head. “Elijah, please. Think about Michelle before you do anything.”
I stood, forcing her to take a step away from the table. “I haven’t thought of anything else.”
I walked out of the diner. That fire fueling my need for revenge had been stoked. Seeing Michelle had confirmed what I had been afraid of. I’d always worried Liam would make her pay for our night together. And clearly, he had. She was a prisoner, and I was going to set her free whether she wanted my help or not.
7
Michelle
I was still trembling when I heard Nick’s bike pull up out front. Seeing Elijah had shaken me to my core. I had always hoped he was alive and well but seeing him had been bittersweet. I was happy he was alive and angry at the same time. He had left me behind and never looked back. I had fantasized about him riding in on his bike one night and whisking me away. I knew it was just a silly dream that could never really happen. I knew it, but that didn’t stop me from dreaming about it.
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