I was trying to breathe, but his grip barely let any air into my lungs.
“You better get your head on straight,” he leaned in even closer. I could feel his breath on my face as he spoke. I wanted to spit at him, but my heart pounded in my chest. My body screamed for oxygen, and his grip was strong. “I am God in your life, and what I say, goes. If I find out you’re involved with that cop in any way, I’ll kill him and then you.”
He released his grip, letting me choke and gasp as I tried to suck air back into my lungs. I put my hand to my throat, rubbing it gently. I could still feel where his fingers had been, but he spoke once more, taking my attention. “Now you get out there and you put on a damn good show tonight. You had your fun yesterday, and today, you’re going to make up for it.”
Without a word, I strode away from him, refusing to let him see the fear in my face or the tears threatening to spill from my eyes. I would go out and do my job because I needed the money to be able to get away from Rocco and the shitshow my life had become. But I refused to let him break me. No more.
Unfortunately for now, I had to play by his rules. But my time was coming. And he’d better watch the fuck out when it did.
9
Jack
Welsh and I walked into the strip club side by side. It hadn’t been hard for me to convince him to tag along. Whether he’d been eager to help me get the goods on Rocco to put him away once and for all, or whether he just wanted to see naked girls jiggling around on stage, I didn’t care. I had backup and that’s what I needed.
“I’m not going to do anything stupid,” I’d told him as I tried to convince him to go with me. “Really. We’re not going in there looking for trouble, and we aren’t going to engage with Rocco at all if we can help it.”
“What if he comes over to us?” Welsh asked.
“We’ll act like any other patron that’s in the club,” I said with a shrug. “We’ll be cordial and keep to ourselves.”
“Doesn’t sound like anyone else there. Drunks slobbering all over the stage being watched by bouncers,” Welsh said with a laugh. “That’s more like it.”
“We aren’t going to be that,” I said. “Somewhere in between.”
“Alright,” he said with a shrug. “Whatever you say.”
“Great,” I said with a grin. “You’re my partner. I want you there beside me in case shit goes down.”
“What sort of shit could go down?” Welsh laughed. “If we’re going to be behaving ourselves?”
“You never know in a place like that,” I replied.
So, after we got off work, we both headed home to shower and change, then we met in the parking lot of Smitty’s. It was Thursday, not their busiest day of the week by far. That was evident by how few cars there were in the lot.
We got past the bouncer and headed into the dark room. There was a stark contrast from the other night, and I could almost call the place tame at that point. The lights were dim, but they weren’t as flashy as they had been on a Friday. The woman dancing on the pole was one whom I recognized, but she wasn’t Sky. I wasn’t even entirely sure that Sky would be working that night.
“So what’s the plan again?” Welsh asked. He was transfixed by the woman on the pole.
“We’re going to find Sky and figure out a way to talk,” I replied. “I’m not sure she’s going to, but we’ve got to try.”
“And you don’t think that’s going to attract the attention of Rocco?” he looked at me with a skeptical expression. “We should have talked about this in the car.”
“I told you to act natural. We aren’t going to interrogate the girl. We’re just going to see if we can get her to talk. Hell, I’ll give pay her for another lap dance if I have to,” I said.
“Well if it’s absolutely necessary for the job,” Welsh said and waggled his eyebrows. “Maybe I’ll employ your special interview techniques with that lovely lady on stage. You know, to see if I can get anything on Rocco from her.”
“Do what you want, just don’t cause a scene. And keep your eyes open for anything that’s suspicious,” I said. “If there’s sleazy shit going down with this guy, you can bet a lot of it is taking place right here.”
He nodded and the two of us took our seats near the stage. Welsh didn’t need much encouragement to act natural. He was doing a fine job as it was. He threw money, he encouraged. It wasn’t long before the woman was on top of him. I rolled my eyes.
It never failed to blow my mind that guys would just toss their hard-earned money away like that. Just the thought of it made me shake my head. Just then, I caught a glimpse of Sky. She was in the back room doing something, but I couldn’t make out what it was. I’d only gotten a glance at her as another dancer came out on stage.
At least you know she’s here. Maybe there’s a chance she’s going to come back out.
I glanced at the clock. It was around the time she’d been leaving the day Rocco had accosted her in the alley, but I wasn’t sure if that was because she was getting off work, or if she had simply been pissed off. It had clearly been a heated exchanged, so I didn’t get the impression she was just then getting off.
My heart leapt to my throat as she walked out onto the stage. There was a woman with green hair on the pole, lifting herself up and twirling herself around. Sky, on the other hand, took to the floor of the stage, putting on a show for the crowd.
She still seemed to be disconnected from the moment, as though she was going through the motions but not really there. Not that it was an uncommon look for those in her profession. Some looked bored, some looked high on their drug of choice, some looked like they actually enjoyed it. But still, there was something just different about the way Sky looked. And I knew down to my toes it had something to do with the thinly veiled threat I’d heard Rocco give her the other day.
She flipped from her back to her hands and knees and crawled toward the edge of the stage, stopping short as soon as she made eye contact with me. Her eyes grew to the size of saucers, and all the color drained out of her face.
Visibly affected, she tried to recover, but I worried she was going to get up and run out. So, I quickly jotted my name and number down on a bill and threw it toward her. Getting back into the groove of her performance, she sensually crawled to pick it up, gathering it with a handful of other bills and putting it in the hem of her lingerie.
Though she was clearly trying to act natural, it seemed to me that she rushed the rest of the performance, getting off the stage and retreating to the back as quickly as possible.
She had been clearly agitated by my presence. I was starting to wonder if maybe I’d gotten it all wrong and what I’d walked into the other day was just a part of their schtick? But no, it couldn’t be. She clearly didn’t want to be there anymore. She was there because she had to be for one reason or another. I sat back in the chair, ordered another drink, and waited for Welsh to be done with his fun. He was running out of money quickly, so it wasn’t going to be long before we were out of there.
It had quickly become obvious to me there was no way I was going to get the chance to talk to the girl here. Hell, she was probably scared to come back out from behind the curtain for fear I’d ask for another lap dance. But she now had my name and contact information.
She’d seen it on the bill, I saw her look at it when she picked it up. Unless she handed all her money over to Rocco when she got to the back, she’d be able to get in touch. And if he did see the money, he was more than welcome to call. God knew I’d love to chat with him.
Welsh came over to me with a grin on his face, and I finished my drink, telling him it was time to go.
“Are you sure?” he asked. “Did you get what you came for?”
“Not exactly, but I think we should get out of here,” I nodded. “Let’s go.”
He followed me back through the door and we parted ways in the parking lot. I didn’t know what to expect. I’d given her my name and number, but the expression on her face was undeniable
. She knew who I was, and she wanted to avoid me.
I wasn’t just some creep who had thrown my number at her. No, I was someone much more dangerous in her world.
Now I just had to wait and see if her curiosity outweighed her fear.
The evening dragged by. We’d only been at the club for an hour, if that, and I had to now play the waiting game. I wasn’t sure if she’d even get a hold of me, let alone how long it would take before she did. All I knew was I had questions, and she was my ticket to getting answers.
I tried watching tv. I tried catching up on some paperwork I needed down at the station. I tried working out in my living room. Nothing could get my mind off Sky or the way she’d reacted when we’d made eye contact that evening.
But, as time passed, I felt less and less like I would actually hear from her. She likely had a lot of numbers given to her, and she didn’t call any. I wouldn’t, if I were her. But I wasn’t someone trying to just hook up with her and I think she knew that.
I was just about ready to call it a night when my phone rang. I looked at the clock. It was eleven-thirty. No one I knew would be calling me that late, and I didn’t recognize the number on the screen so I answered as quickly as I could.
“Hello?”
“Officer. Thomas? This is Su- Sky from Smitty’s. You wanted to talk to me?” The voice on the other end of the line was angelic. It was the first I’d heard her speak, and it cut right through me. My heart skipped a beat and started racing, and my mind almost went blank.
I could imagine what it would be like to hear her moaning with pleasure, screaming my name as I made her come again and again. But I caught the fact she almost said a different name. Her real name, most likely.
“Yes. I’m glad you called,” I said. “I just wanted to make sure you were alright. I’m surprised to see you were still at the club after the other day.”
“I’m fine,” she said flatly. She didn’t elaborate, so I continued.
“Listen, Sky, is that right?” I asked, hoping she’d give me her real name.
“Sky’s fine,” she said.
“There’s reason to believe that your boss Rocco Andretti is involved in some serious illegal activity. Is there a way I can talk to you about that?” I asked.
She made an indecipherable noise. “You want me to rat out Rocco?” she asked.
"Yes, Ma’am,” I answered. “Can you help us?”
There was hesitation on the other end of the line. I sensed she tried to speak a couple times, but nothing would come out. Her breathing was strained, and I could hear she was outside. “We can go somewhere private or talk over the phone if you would like.”
“I’m sorry,” she said finally. “I can’t help you.”
“That’s disappointing to hear. I can assure you, we wouldn’t let anything happen to you. We would keep your name out of it as much as possible. If Rocco is hurting you, I don’t want–” she interrupted me.
“I can’t help you,” she repeated. Before I had the chance to say anything else, she hung up the phone.
“Fuck!” I muttered. I tried calling her back, but just as I suspected, there wasn’t any answer.
She sent me right to voicemail.
10
Sky
I didn’t know what had possessed me to call Jack the night before, but on my way home. Maybe I had just needed to hear his strong, deep voice again. The one that had threatened to kick Rocco’s ass if he’d found him with his hands on me again. The sound of it in my ear had sent a shiver down my spine. Writing his info on the money had been a smart thing to do. It was a sure way to get it to me without Rocco finding out. It had scared the shit out of me seeing him in the club after what Rocco had said. If he saw Jack there, I would certainly take the heat for it.
I’d hidden the bill in my jacket as soon as I ran back to the dressing room. I didn’t want Rocco to see, and there were times when he’d take our money. He was supposed to get a cut of what we brought in anyway, but that came out of the paychecks he issued, not from our cash.
After counting the amount and putting the money in my bag, I paused for a moment, taking a few deep breaths. There wasn’t any doubt in my mind that he wanted to see me. That had to be the only reason why he was coming, but only paying attention to me.
Candy was giving a guy a lap dance, and Ruby was on the pole when I walked out. They were both beautiful women, but he wasn’t giving either a second glance. His eyes were only on me, and when we made eye contact, he made it clear he wanted my attention.
Yet, he hadn’t asked for another lap dance. I would have guessed that was what he was there for, but instead he only gave me his information. The thought of it had both scared and thrilled me. Then Rocco had broken me from my reverie..
“I don’t pay you to stand around!” Rocco called over his shoulder on his way down the hall. I wasn’t sure where he came from, but my heart raced when he rounded the corner to head out to the lobby.
If he saw Jack, I’d be dead for sure.
With a deep breath, I headed back to the stage, ready to perform and hoping against hope Rocco would see that Jack was the one targeting me, not the other way around.
But, as soon as I walked through the curtain, I realized that he was gone. And so was the man Candy had been dancing for. The lobby was starting to fill with men who were getting off work and coming in for their fix, and I knew it was going to be another long night.
Not just because I didn’t want to be there, but because I wanted to know what Jack was after. He’d already saved me from Rocco once, maybe he wanted to again.
Then, I’d had the conversation with him. Just as I suspected, he brought up Rocco. He offered to help. And my heart broke just a little. He really was just trying to nail Rocco and I was the convenient way to get to him. He’d already laid the groundwork by coming to my rescue, hadn’t he?
I had actually wanted to help him, but I didn’t know how to tell him. If I were to work with him and Rocco found out, that would be it for me. And, I didn’t see any way around that. There wasn’t any way he could talk to Rocco without him knowing that the information had come from me. I knew he said they could protect me, but I wasn’t sure Jack really knew how deep Rocco’s connections ran. There was likely a man in his own department on Rocco’s payroll.
Rocco already suspected something was going on, and if Jack were to stay in the picture, Rocco would know he was right. So I’d panicked halfway through the conversation and hung up. I couldn’t do it. Couldn’t agree to help him, nothing.
And now, I had to face another day at Rocco’s mercy. Dread and anger filled me throughout the morning, and I wanted more than anything to get off the hook for going in that night. But the clock was relentless, and soon enough I was on my way to the club.
I slipped through the back door as silently as possible, hoping to get to the stage without Rocco seeing me. But he was clearly waiting for me to arrive. I’d scarcely set foot in the building when he called me to his office.
“I need to talk to you,” he said. My heart raced and I feared the worst. I didn’t think he ever watched the security footage, but maybe he had? Maybe he saw Jack in the club and was going to kill me for it.
There was only one way to find out.
“What this?” he asked.
“What?” I replied, a little too quickly. I thought he was about to show me the tv. Instead, he dropped a bra on the table. Relief rushed through me, though I knew I was about to get yelled at again.
“You are supposed to write down all purchases. I got charged for this on my card, but there’s no record of it anywhere. You wearing this?” he asked.
“I’ve worn it a couple times,” I admitted.
“Out?” he pressed.
“A couple times,” I said. I had been using the piece for my personal wear. I’d intended to take it home with me, but I knew I had to have something as a backup at the club. I never knew what was going to happen, and at least that bra wasn’t quite as racy as some
of the other pieces.
“Why the fuck would you think I wanted to pay for this when you’re wearing it out?” he snapped. “This is my bra!”
“Okay, I get it,” I said, trying not to show my apprehension as his tone.
“Put it on!” he snapped, throwing the bra at me.
“Okay,” I said. I picked it up and turned to go, but he stopped me.
“I said put it on!”
“I’m going to,” I said.
“Right now!” he barked.
“I’m going to the dressing room,” I said.
“No, you aren’t walking out of here until you put that damn thing on! I’m not your personal ATM. You spend my money on this shit, I’m going to enjoy it!” he said.
“Rocco,” I tried again.
“Put the damn bra on!” he shouted. I was sure the people out in the lobby could hear him, but I knew there was no getting out of it. I bit my tongue and I pulled off my hoodie and my tank. I refused to let him see anything, so I turned from him, facing the door with my back to him as I took my bra off and put the other one on.
It was lime green, and it almost glowed it was so bright. I’d loved it in the store and had thought it would look good under the lights at work. But I usually donned the same outfit, so I hadn’t tried it yet.
“There, it’s on,” I said.
“Let me see!”
I turned. “Happy?”
I hated the way his eyes ran over my body, and there was a part of me that was afraid he was going to touch me in some way. We were in his office with the door closed, and if he wanted to make a move it would be my word against his with no witnesses. I felt humiliated by the time he gave a nod of approval.
“Now get your ass out of here and on the stage, and don’t you ever do that again,” he barked.
With my face burning from embarrassment and hatred, I gathered my clothes from the floor and headed to my station. I hated the way he made me feel. Hated every second of it. Everything he did was to make it known that he was in charge. That he could do anything he wanted to anyone he wanted, and we had no control over it. I wanted more and more to make him pay for his bullshit.
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