by Karen Wood
‘Oh well, a woman’s destiny must be her own,’ said Jess. ‘Now, I have to get ready for school.’ She left her parents staring dumbstruck at each other.
She stumbled out the door and down the front steps, shoving her riding jeans into her schoolbag. She threw hay to the horses and walked hurriedly to the school bus, realising too late that she had left both her lunch and her phone behind.
She found an old brekkie bar in the pocket of her bag and a bruised green pear, and made that her breakfast. She combed her hair as she watched the paddocks and hills roll past. The bus picked up more kids in town and she rummaged around in her bag to find her diary, which might give her some clue as to what was expected of her that day.
Wednesday went slowly. Jess drifted through the day like early morning fog over the mountain cemetery. It was difficult to get back into the groove of classes, libraries, books and smartboards.
She tried not to think of Luke, swimming in the freezing river and riding through the mountains, snow whirling around him. She wanted to message him and find out how Filth was going, but her phone was at home. He wouldn’t get her calls anyway, unless he was up a tree for some reason.
Jess used her lunch break to belt through some homework so she could go and see Luke’s brumbies after school. She was dying to see Opal too. She wondered all day if the traumatised horses were any more settled, or if they had gone the way of their stallion.
When she got to Harry’s she found Luke’s wildies looking healthier – their flanks had filled out and their various wounds seemed to be healing. But they were as jittery as ever, starting at the slightest noise and staying closely huddled together. The sight of them filled her head with images of nets and trucks and boat winches.
Jess held a carrot through the fence to Opal. ‘Hey, girl.’ She smiled as she ran her hands over the filly’s neck. ‘I missed you.’ She glanced at the brumby mares behind as Opal took the entire carrot and crunched on it whole. ‘Fancy not knowing the joys of root vegetables.’
Rosie and Corey arrived on their horses.
‘How have you gone with these guys?’ asked Jess, glancing at the brumbies.
‘Still can’t get anywhere near them,’ said Corey. ‘I’ve tried a few times and they just totally freak out.’
‘How about Lawson’s ones?’
Corey’s face brightened. ‘They’re going great. John gelded the two colts and I’ve taught them to lead.’
He bent down from his saddle and opened the gate to the arena, where Lawson’s six wild horses chewed on hay. He ushered one of the geldings out into the arena and began riding around behind it. Jess watched in amazement as he pushed his horse into a canter and began circling around the trotting brumby at a slow lope, gradually getting closer. When he got alongside, he leaned over and slipped a halter over the brumby’s ears. It shook its head but kept trotting. Corey let it run and kept circling it around and around, without putting any pressure on the rope.
After a minute or so, the brumby settled into a rhythm and Corey kept cantering, circling, circling, then reached down and gently ran a hand over the gelding’s back and neck, then over its rump. Jess was surprised at how accepting the animal was. Corey looped a rope around the horse’s rump and encouraged it to walk up alongside his horse. He led it for a couple of circles each way, asked it to stop and then removed the rope and halter and let the brumby go. It whinnied and trotted back to its mob.
Jess opened the gate with a smile on her face. She had to admit that was skilful riding, and great horsemanship.
‘It’s a cool technique, isn’t it?’ said Rosie, still sitting on Buster and watching from the sidelines.
‘Sure is,’ Jess agreed. ‘They’re ready to go to their new home.’
‘Have a turn,’ offered Corey. ‘Try the other gelding.’
Jess spent the afternoon on Dodger, with Rosie and Corey on the rails instructing her, haltering the brumbies one by one, circling, running her hands over them and then releasing them.
‘You guys have done such an amazing job,’ said Jess, as she let the last one go. But she couldn’t help feeling sad about Luke’s mob of three wildies. Would they ever adapt to their new surroundings?
The next day, Jess woke feeling desperately blank. She hunted for her phone, but in vain. The emptiness of being apart from Luke stayed with her all day. It couldn’t be healthy, she thought, to miss someone so much, to be so miserable without them.
‘A woman’s destiny must be her own,’ she scrawled absent-mindedly across the inside of her textbook. But she was having trouble believing it.
23
JESS SAT IN CLASS, willing herself to keep it together until she got to Harry’s. Being with the horses would make everything better. She needed to be near them, to see the calmness in Dodger’s eyes, be mesmerised by Opal’s easy lope.
That afternoon, she helped Corey and Rosie with the trapped brumbies again. This time they were able to lead all of them around off the side of their horses. Jess spent some time with each one, off the back of Dodger, teaching them how to ‘follow a feel’ and give to the gentle pressure of the ropes, how to step into the release and come willingly forward. They quickly became light and responsive. It was fantastic progress and soon she became lost in their world again.
As she helped feed up that night, Jess felt certain that all of Lawson’s brumbies would make good riding mounts. But the same couldn’t be said for Sapphire’s mares. Jess walked to their yard and found them eating hay with Opal. They jumped when they saw her and began milling around nervously, trying to hide between each other, packing into a tight group. Jess took a rope and walked into the yard. She would take Opal home tonight. Dodger was too lonely without her. He had whinnied all night.
Opal stood slightly to the outside of the mares. Surely it wouldn’t upset them too much if she just nicked into the yard and led Opal out of there. Jess made a loop with the rope and coiled it in her hand as she approached the filly, then fumbled it and dropped one end. She stooped to pick it up.
Without warning, Opal’s shoulder barged into her, sending her sprawling into the mud. She saw hooves and legs coming at her and rolled quickly away and under the fence.
Rosie ran to her. ‘You okay?’
Jess clutched her throbbing shoulder and winced. ‘Landed on my arm,’ she groaned.
In the yard the mare swung her rump around and lifted her tail, squirting and winking.
‘They’re horsing like mad,’ said Rosie. ‘It’s sending Biyanga nuts. We had to lock him in his stable.’
Jess stood in the gateway and called Opal over, waiting until the brumby mares were at the other side of the yard before letting Opal out. She watched them as she closed the gate.
‘We’ll have to do something with them soon. They can’t stay in here the rest of their lives,’ said Rosie from behind her. ‘Luke needs to come back.’
As Jess settled into bed that night, she heard a muffled ring. She lifted her head and listened. Her phone! Where was it?
She leapt out of bed and flew to the laundry, diving on her duffle bag and madly excavating. Nothing. She stopped. Listened. Saw a faint glow down the side of the washing machine. How the heck had it got under there? It was lit up and vibrating and she pounced on it, slamming her finger onto the button and pressing it to her ear, hoping like mad it hadn’t rung out.
‘Yes?’
‘Jess!’
‘Luke?’
She heard him sigh with relief. ‘Jessy.’
‘It’s nearly midnight, you mad thing,’ she whispered, unable to contain her happiness.
‘I’m sitting on Rambo. It’s a full moon. I’m on top of the mountain and there is snow everywhere. It’s amazing, Jessy!’
‘Wow.’ She wished desperately she was there, on the back of Rambo with him.
‘The little creamy foal, the one you saved. It’s back with its mum!’
‘Min Min,’ said Jess. ‘We called her Min Min.’
‘I’ve been tryin
g to ring you and tell you.’
‘I lost my phone.’ She didn’t think he could get coverage, except from . . .
‘I miss you, Jess.’
‘I miss you too.’
‘Yeah, but I miss you heaps.’
‘Is it keeping you awake at night?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Thought it might be.’ Jess laughed as she crept back to her bedroom and crawled under the covers. A smile spread over her face as she lay back against her pillow. ‘Am I having a dream or something?’
‘Depends. Are you dreaming about me?’
‘I always dream about you.’
‘I would dream about you too if I could get to sleep in the first place.’
‘You need a therapy pet.’
Before she could tell him about Sapphire’s mares, the phone went dead. ‘Luke? You there?’
It had lost reception. She lay with the phone held against her chest, bitterly disappointed, hoping it would ring again.
So this was what their relationship would be: broken phone calls in the middle of the night, whenever he had the energy to go up the mountain. She finally gave up and willed herself to sleep. If it was all she could have of him, she would take it.
24
LAWSON’S BRUMBIES PROGRESSED quickly. Once they could lead and tie up, load on and off a horse float, graze inside a fenced paddock and pick up all their feet without fuss, Lawson called the buyer and told him the horses were ready.
A man arrived one afternoon in a small horse truck. While Lawson talked to him, Jess slipped a halter around Buddy and led him to the loading ramp. ‘You be good,’ she said, letting the little pale chestnut nuzzle at her hands. ‘You show them what fine horses the tablelands brumbies are.’
She slung the rope over his neck, turned his head towards the opening of the truck and slapped him on the rump. ‘Walk up,’ she said, letting him load himself.
Buddy scrambled quickly up the ramp and walked into the back of the truck. He turned his hindquarters so that he stood alongside the partitions. Jess followed and closed the steel divider beside him, making way for the next horse. Then she tied his halter to the bars on the small window. ‘You have a fun life, Buddy,’ she said, giving him a final pat goodbye.
Corey led the next horse up, and one by one, all six of Lawson’s brumbies were loaded and tethered securely inside the truck. Jess took a last look at them and felt an enormous sense of satisfaction. They were beautiful horses, kind by nature, hardy and athletic.
She cast her mind back to the first day she had met Luke, loping around an arena on a fine black colt he had broken in himself, a mixed-up kid full of aggro and confusion. These brumbies would soon sort out another bunch of mixed-up kids at Lawson’s friend’s clinic.
They know everything you’re thinking. They just mirror what you do.
Lawson joined her at the fence as the truck pulled out of the driveway and rolled down the road. ‘Hear from Luke yet?’
‘Yeah, only for a minute, then the phone cut out,’ said Jess. ‘There’s no reception down there.’
‘Tell me about it,’ said Lawson, sounding annoyed. ‘What’s he doing, is he coming back?’
Jess shrugged. ‘He told me he’d be back by next school holidays.’
‘He said the same to me,’ said Lawson. ‘But I just got a call from TAFE. He’s been making enquiries about transferring his farrier’s apprenticeship to a college down there.’
Jess looked at Lawson with her mouth open.
‘He didn’t tell you either, did he?’ Lawson looked unimpressed. ‘Sorry to bring bad news, kid.’ He turned and walked back to the house.
Jess stood alone, staring up the road. She could still hear the fading engine of the horse truck, grinding its gears as it made its way around the bends in the road.
Jess sat under the big coachwood tree, staring gloomily through the fence rails at Luke’s miserable-looking brum–bies. The foal was a sooty dun, or buckskin. There was nothing pretty about him – he looked as though he had been rolled in dirt – but he was a nice enough type and would probably make a good station horse.
‘Maybe we should wean that colt,’ said Corey, sitting beside her. ‘Must be a yearling. Be impossible to handle him with his mad mother nearby.’
‘And what about the two mares?’
‘Bush ‘em somewhere. We’ll never get them broke. They’re too old, too wild.’
‘Blakely Downs.’
‘Or down at Luke’s place.’
‘You mean Matty’s Creek,’ said Jess. She glared at Corey. ‘This is Luke’s place, here.’
Corey looked slightly bewildered. ‘Whatever . . . Has he put in any fences yet?’
‘How would I know?’ said Jess. ‘He doesn’t tell me anything. I can’t even reach him on the phone.’
‘Let’s get the poor things into a paddock. Then at least they can eat some grass,’ he said. ‘Come on, I’ll help you.’
Jess and Corey spent what was left of the day setting up a brumby paddock for Sapphire’s mares. They chose one with lots of trees and checked over all the electric wiring. Finally, Jess and Opal led them out of the yard and down the laneway. They followed warily, eyes rolling all over the place. Once inside the paddock, Jess led Opal around the fenced boundary and then took her to the trough for a drink. Finally, she unbuckled the filly’s halter and released her with the mares.
‘Look, they’re grazing already,’ said Corey. ‘Bet that tastes good.’
The chestnut mare ran her nose along the ground and took mouthfuls of grass. The bay and her foal followed.
‘I just hope they don’t gallop through the fences.’
‘They’ve had a good look at them,’ said Corey. ‘One zap and they’ll soon learn they can’t go through them.’
Jess watched them a while longer before feeling satisfied they wouldn’t hurt themselves. Back at the stables, Dodger was still saddled. Jess vaulted onto him, then took Opal’s rope and led her alongside.
As she rode out the gate, Jess turned back to Corey. ‘I’ll try and get a message to Luke. See what he wants to do with them.’
Corey nodded and closed the gate for her.
She rode home along the river flats in the dark, crossing creeks and brushing through the long grass. She took a long detour up to Mossy Mountain and Dodger picked his way over the windy trail as though it were broad daylight. Jess marvelled at how well horses could see at night.
At the top, she looked out over the valley at the sparsely scattered lights of the farm houses. A cool southerly caressed her face. She pulled her phone from her saddlebags and sent a text message to Luke.
I think you should come and get the brumby mares.
25
JESS WAITED ON HER front verandah with her duffle bag stuffed full and her swag rolled up. Nerves flitted about in her stomach. God, how many times had she felt like this?
Lawson’s truck finally swung into her driveway. It stopped by the house, motor running.
She’d only had two other phone calls from Luke over the past three weeks. Both times they had been cut short. Nothing was said about colleges and there was no mention of him staying or leaving. The subject was left dangling in the air, unacknowledged.
Which was good, she told herself. It allowed her to concentrate on school and get really good marks. She came home triumphantly with her exam results, knowing they would give her strong leverage should she need to negotiate holidays with her parents. Craig and Caroline agreed to let her go back to Mathews’ Flat, to help resettle the brumby mares.
When Luke jumped out of the truck, there was no big swirling hug. Just a quick, awkward embrace. ‘Hey,’ he said.
‘Hey,’ she said back.
Grace’s head poked out the window. ‘Hurry up and get in, Jessy. We gotta make dinner time at the Matty’s Flat Hotel!’
The thought of Kitty’s roast dinner made Jess’s spirits lift a little.
Luke took her swag and swung it up into the back of the tr
uck through a small side door. She pushed her duffle bag in after it and, through a gap in the side boards, she saw the hooves of the brumby mares.
‘Are you going to let them go?’ she asked.
‘It’s private land,’ said Luke. ‘No one can stop me.’
Jess climbed up next to Grace.
Luke barely had time to close the door before Lawson rolled back down the driveway. From the packing shed, Craig waved and Jess watched in the truck’s side mirror as the house disappeared behind her.
Hours later, the truck’s engine groaned as it climbed ever upward into the tablelands country. The headlights made a tunnel of grey and soft blue before them. Light bounced off the silvery uprights of gum trees, and reflectors lit the side of the road like fairy lights. On the back the two mares and the yearling foal clattered about as they tried to keep their footing.
When they pulled to a stop outside the Matty’s Flat Hotel it was nine-thirty and all Jess could think about was roast beef and veggies swimming in Kitty’s homemade gravy.
She helped Luke check the horses before dinner. They spread out straw, lugged buckets of water and broke open a bale of hay. The mares began eating immediately.
‘They look happier than they did this afternoon,’ said Luke, sounding surprised. ‘More content. Maybe they like the truck or something.’ He shrugged. ‘Or maybe they’re just tired.’
‘Maybe they know they’re going home,’ said Jess, as she watched the tired buckskin foal nuzzle down into a bed of straw. ‘They can smell the mountains.’
‘I can’t wait to release them in the morning,’ said Luke, ‘and watch them gallop back into the wild.’
‘Same.’
Inside the pub, the fire was roaring around a huge stack of sawn logs. Barker and Steve were standing by the fireplace and Kitty was behind the bar. Luke made a big deal of introducing Lawson as his brother, and much hand-shaking and jocularity followed. They’d barely had time to get a drink when Rosie and Mrs Arnold walked in, followed by Tom and Corey.