“So, we hunt,” Maddox said finally, letting Ellie lean into him.
“We hunt,” Logan agreed, sealing their mission.
Maddox had a feeling they weren’t done with these three, not by far.
Chapter 9
The light from the moon danced on Ellie’s skin, and her wolf begged to come forth, ready to be set free. She’d never been on a hunt with the Centrals—not once in all her years of torment and growing. No, her past life had never been as communal as that. If Corbin and her father had gone on hunts, they had been hunting the weaker wolves who they wanted out of the Pack. It had been a brutal reminder that the Centrals were on their own and held to no law—even if they hid it from the other Packs so they wouldn’t be taken out.
She held back a shudder and inhaled the crisp air, needing to calm down so she wouldn’t alert the others with her fears. The twins thought they knew all, but they didn’t know the barest brutality that lay beneath her skin like a stain that could never be washed away. Lexi already knew too much, even if Ellie wasn’t sure what the other woman knew.
She let her mind wander to the hunts she’d been on with the Redwoods. She’d felt free, fearless, and strong—if only for a moment. Rather than hiding and shifting in her room so Corbin wouldn’t find her, she’d hunted with wolves who actually loved and cared for one another.
Ellie had always been aware of the looks the others, the ones who had never trusted her, gave her, but she’d done her best to ignore them. The Jamensons had brought her into their fold, even if Maddox hadn’t wanted her the way she so desperately wanted him.
They had made her family.
Then her brother had taken that away.
He was really the only person she could think of—other than Caym—who would kill her new Pack mates in order to frame her. She might have been able to stay and clean up the damage before, but not anymore. Too many people had died at the hands of her blood, and she’d begun to lose hope.
She’d find a way to clear her name. There was no way she’d lose everything she’d gained in such a short amount of time, even though she had no idea how to go about doing that.
The only way she could think was go to the Centrals directly to find their mole. The Jamensons were working on their end to find it, so Ellie would do her best to help on her end. Meaning she’d enter the hole of depravity where it’s source had long since stalked her and try to not only find a way to make it right, but find a way to help the Redwoods for their future.
Ellie shuddered again, this time swallowing the bile that followed.
She really didn’t want to go back, though there might not be a choice.
“Ellie? What’s wrong?” Maddox asked as he came to her side. The wind brushed his hair from his face, the lack of hair showing the scar against his skin more than usual. Concern filled his gaze, and she pulled herself up so she wouldn’t fall into his arms or grab him and keep him close so she could also protect him.
She wasn’t a fully dominant wolf, nor was she a submissive one, and Maddox made her want to act like both.
“Just getting ready for the hunt.” It wasn’t exactly a lie, but she wasn’t about to tell him what she’d been thinking about.
He already didn’t want her, and she couldn’t let him see exactly how ruined she was…how much she didn’t deserve him.
God, she hated the way she sounded. She also didn’t make any sense considering she was mad that he didn’t want her either. Mating made her crazy, that had to be it. She needed to heal, to be free, but she didn’t think that would happen any time soon, not with them being on the run.
“If you’re sure.” His hands fisted as if he had to hold himself back from reaching out to her.
Or, maybe that was just her own desires making her see things.
“Of course.” She looked into the surrounding forest, and the shadows grew deeper, their spindly fingers almost reaching out for her. “I don’t want to go for too long, just long enough to make sure my wolf is happy.”
Well, as happy as she could be.
“I’m with you on that,” he said, and he abruptly turned away from her. “Plus, I don’t know that I like leaving North alone here.”
“He’ll be with Lexi,” Ellie added, wanting to know what Maddox thought of that.
“Yes, that.” He smiled slightly, and Ellie held back a sigh. She really needed to stop acting like a teenager. Or, at least how she assumed a normal teenager acted.
Back when she’d been a teen, she’d been different from everyone else.
Then she’d met Maddox, and everything had changed.
She hadn’t known she was his mate yet. No, that wouldn’t come until she reached adulthood, but she remembered the way he’d been chained to her brother’s table. She remembered the way he’d screamed when Corbin had scarred him. She remembered how she’d done her best to help him, only to find herself on the receiving end of Corbin’s pure rage for the first time.
Corbin had enjoyed toying with her since she’d been a toddler, but it had been her betrayal that had led him to his new fascination.
She swallowed hard as she stripped down so she could change to her wolf, doing her best to not look at Maddox as he did the same. They both had scars, most of his from Corbin—the same as her. She didn’t want to invade his privacy, and as wolves, they might be okay with nudity, but they wouldn’t cross the line and comment on things better left hidden…at least for now.
The moon danced across her skin as she knelt on all fours, letting her wolf wash over her. Her bones broke and reformed, the muscles and tendons tearing then tying together. Her face elongated, and fur sprouted over her body. She wasn’t as fast at transforming as North—not by far—but she was faster than she’d been when she’d been with the Centrals.
Apparently, even a fragile form of acceptance made her wolf stronger, calmer.
Finally, she stood on four paws by Maddox’s side. She threw her head back and howled, relishing in the wolf, in the freedom, and in the future she could have.
It had to be better than what she’d had before.
It had to.
Over Sixty Years Ago.
Ellie watched the broken man make his way across the Central’s border. She hoped he made it home, but she wasn’t sure he’d do so. Corbin had hurt him badly, yet there was nothing she could do about it, other than try to get him free. She couldn’t cross the wards, not when her own life was in danger.
She’d done the best she could. It would be up to the broken wolf to find his way home and heal. She just prayed to the goddess he would be all right.
She looked over her shoulder as she suppressed a shudder. There wasn’t any more time for woolgathering and praying. She needed to make it back to her chamber before Corbin found out she’d escaped.
He hadn’t chained her in her room—not like he’d done with her twin and cousin—but Ellie knew it would be only a matter of time.
And if he found out she’d helped his prisoner…
She swallowed hard.
Best not to think about that.
Ellie crept along the edge of the woods and held her breath. She just needed to pass through the closest door, and she’d be okay.
She heard the growl before someone slammed her into the ground.
“You bitch!” Corbin yelled as he smashed his fist into her side.
She struggled beneath him, holding her tongue and trying not to scream… He loved it when they screamed. Her side ached, and she feared he’d broken something.
Goddess, don’t let me die. Not yet.
The goddess didn’t answer her, as usual, but still she prayed that she wouldn’t die at her brother’s hands.
“You let him go, you whore! Did you fuck him? Is that why you let him go? You’re mine, Ellie, mine.” He sneered the last word, and she swallowed hard, fear filling her as bile rose in her throat.
He growled at her silence and slapped her hard, her cheekbone shattering under his brute strength.
“I’ve been patient with you, waiting for you to grow enough to understand the way things work, but you’ve disappointed me, Ellie.” An odd gleam entered his eyes, and Ellie wanted to take back her prayer to the goddess.
Maybe some things were worse than death.
He hit her broken cheek once more. Blinding pain assaulted her before she screamed out, and then she succumbed to the darkness.
Ellie woke much later, or at least it felt that way. She blinked away the darkness and tried not to cry. Her arms were chained above her head, her body hanging from the ceiling. Her toes barely brushed the floor—not enough for her to relieve the ache on her shoulders, just enough so she could hope for relief but never find it.
Her brother was always an expert in finding ways to torture those he wanted to feel the full pain of his wrath.
Ellie had never been on the receiving end though.
She’d been stripped to her undershirt and panties, so at least she wasn’t naked like most of those who had been in this room. Her cheek ached, but she knew it was healing due to her wolf—meaning she’d been out of it for at least a day.
The side where Corbin had hit her before only hurt a little, so she’d healed a bit at least. The room was lit with only a bare bulb. The walls were dirty and sprayed with dried blood. Corbin liked to keep some rooms filled with the evidence of his torture, while others were clean to the point of madness. Each room had a specific purpose, and this one’s was to taunt her with what was to come.
She knew she shouldn’t have helped that man…but she hadn’t been able to stop herself. Something had beckoned her to do it, and she’d succumbed.
Now, she would pay the price, but at least that man had a chance.
There had to be a good reason for it all…there had to be hope.
The lone door opened slowly, and Corbin strolled in, a frown on his face. Her brother looked just like her and the rest of her family, dark eyes, dark hair, tan skin, but where others looked normal, he looked like the depraved man he was.
“It’s good you’re up, sister mine,” he said, his voice low. “I’m going to have fun with my new toy. I’ve waited for you to be by my side, and yet you’ve shunned me. Now, I will beat this new found strength out of you.”
She blinked, her mind not really registering what was about to happen. How could it? Though she’d never been loved—not truly—she’d never been in this position before. For some reason, she’d always held on to the hope that Corbin might change…that he might show mercy.
Not anymore.
“If it’s any consolation, I won’t rape you,” he drawled, and relief filled her. “I’m not that grotesque. Don’t look that happy about it, dear sister. No, I have friends who will do that for me. They’re waiting right outside the door in fact. We’re going to take every ounce of dignity and fire in you and strip it away. You’ve lost the right to hope.”
He smiled then, and a little part of her died.
No, no, this couldn’t be happening.
She’d never even kissed a man before…goddess no.
The door opened again, and three men walked in behind Corbin.
She took a deep breath and screamed.
Her brother might have liked the anguish, but she wouldn’t go down without a fight…even if it was hopeless.
The other men smiled, and she closed her eyes.
Maybe there wasn’t a reason to hope at all.
Over Two Years Ago.
Ellie watched as the demon killed her sister, drinking her blood. Fire raged within her, but she didn’t say a word.
She couldn’t.
Her sister and cousin had long since given in to their fates and had died inside. Their bodies had been the only things left keeping them going…
Now, they were gone.
Mixed with the fire was a strange and sad relief. At least they wouldn’t be in pain anymore.
Unlike her.
She’d always been the one to mouth off though. Since that first time Corbin had locked her up in his dungeon, she’d grown a thicker skin, fighting back to protect those weaker and taking the beating and rapes so he left the others in peace.
It had all been for naught it seemed.
Slowly, she backed away from the crowd as they stood yelling for their new member. Some were scared she saw, but they hid it well. She knew that others had already left the Pack, hiding in areas far away so they wouldn’t have to succumb to the evil that was sure to come with this new arrival.
Ellie made her way to her room, locking the door behind her. Though Corbin had a key and could get in anytime he wanted, it at least kept out the others…most days.
She’d tried to escape numerous times before, but Corbin and her father had always found her.
Her body shook at the reminders of what he’d done to her when she had been found. Corbin had kept to his word and had never raped her personally…but his numerous friends had taken their turns.
There didn’t seem to be a point in fighting anymore, though she did. If it had looked like she’d given in, Corbin might have grown tired of her and killed her long before.
Even though there were worse things than death, she always held out hope that one day she’d be free to heal…free to just be.
She’d helped others escape and live… Maybe one day it would be her turn.
The sound of the click of the door being unlocked sent a quick prick of pain down her spine.
Corbin walked in, a smile on his face that scared her much more than a mere frown would.
“I see you’re being as obstinate as ever, dear sister,” Corbin said as he strolled toward her. Instinctively, she reached out to slap him, but he caught her wrist, his nostrils flaring. “Such impertinence. You’d have thought it would have been long beaten out of you. No matter, you’re needed somewhere else now.”
Ellie stood still, her pulse racing.
What on earth could he need from her?
“It’s too bad about the others who died, but really, I was done with them anyway.”
Hatred filled her at the callous mention of the family he’d killed—or had served up on a platter for the demon to kill.
“I wouldn’t speak now, if I were you,” Corbin warned. “You didn’t do your duty earlier and sacrifice yourself for the greater good of the Pack, so, now, you’ll do what is needed.”
Her heart raced at the thought of what was going to happen.
No. Not again.
“Caym, may I present my sister. Your prize.” Corbin turned to the demon as he strolled into the room.
Caym looked like a fallen angel, his sharp cheekbones and dark hair striking against his dead eyes.
He smiled, and Ellie sucked in a breath.
Evil.
That’s the only word that came to mind.
“Now, what shall I do with you, dear wolf?” Caym whispered, and that last bit of hope faded away.
There really wasn’t a reason to dream anymore.
Her nightmares were real.
And inescapable.
Present Day
A wolf whimpered beside her, and Ellie blinked, her body shaking on four legs as she stood in the forest, unaware of her surroundings.
Something completely idiotic considering they were in danger at all times.
She turned her head toward the whimper and saw Parker by her side, his little wolf body shaking with either excitement or fear—she didn’t know which.
Ellie leaned down and rubbed her head on his, trying to assuage his fears—if that’s what they were. He leaned into her and sniffed, inhaling her scent.
If she’d been human, she would have smiled at the pup.
Parker and those innocents like him were the reason she’d made it out alive during her years of captivity. She just needed to remember that.
She looked up at Maddox and Logan, who stared at her with interest. She lowered her gaze, not wanting to intimidate or show the weakness in her eyes.
Maddox padded toward her and nudged her
side, and she held back a whimper of her own. She gave a small yip and trotted off, trying to put her memories behind her. The others followed as they continued their hunt.
Maddox ran by her side, and she felt grateful. Even though she wanted—no, needed—to stand on her own, the fact he that was there, if only in a promise of hope, helped her carry on.
Her own darkness was rife with pain and memories she couldn’t bear, but maybe one day, she’d be able to face her own fears…and past.
Maybe one day she’d be good enough for Maddox and for the Pack that had welcomed her—if only for a brief time.
Maybe one day…
Chapter 10
Ellie hugged the blanket around her shoulders tighter, suppressing a shudder. It might have been sunny out, but that didn’t stop the cold from seeping into her bones. The darkness seemed to creep in, trying to suffocate her with its barrenness and shadow. She knew it was all in her head, but for some reason, she couldn’t settle. Something seemed off—as though their calm was about to explode into a storm of hatred and death.
She wasn’t a seer or anything of note, but she had a feeling that it didn’t matter what she thought was real or not. The dangers were coming, and death was on its trail.
They’d been at the cabin for a full day now, and nothing had been decided past reserving their strength for when and if the Centrals found them. She knew Maddox had another plan up his sleeve—he always did—but she didn’t know if it also contained their three new companions.
“Ellie?”
She turned at the sound of Parker’s voice and smiled. He was such a quiet child that she normally didn’t even hear him coming. That normally would have scared her, but for some reason, she felt a kindred spirit within this boy. He, too, had no home and no family but the ones who protected him now, even if it meant their own life.
She looked into those hazel eyes and held back a frown. There was something different about him, yet she couldn’t put her finger on it. Maybe it had to do with his father since, though he looked like a miniature version of his Uncle Logan, he still had traces of someone else.
Shattered Emotions (Redwood Pack) Page 9