by Simone Elise
My fingers dashed across the phone and I pressed dial. Please answer. I didn’t know when I would get this opportunity again. I moved the curtains and looked down at the driveway. Still nothing.
“Trent?”
She answered. She sounded half asleep, but she answered. I closed my eyes in relief. “Kim?” Who the hell was Trent?
“ABBY!”
“Yeah, it’s me.”
“Oh my god. OH MY GOD. Are you OK? Did you escape? Where are you?” She was wide awake now.
“No. I wish. And I don’t know. Some mansion that has central locking and bulletproof glass. How’s Tyson? How’s Kade? Did he get shot? How bad? Is he in the hospital?” Now that I had a chance to get answers to my questions, I couldn’t stop them from all tumbling out at once.
“He is fine. They both are. Do you want to talk to him? Why didn’t you call him?”
“I did. He didn’t answer.” I looked down the driveway. “Look, I don’t have long.”
“I’ll get him. I’m running. Just hold on a sec.” I heard her trip, most likely over something in her bedroom because it was always untidy. I swear that girl loved living in a mess.
I could hear her running and the opening of doors.
“OK. I’m heading up the stairs. I swear it will only be a second longer,” she spoke hurriedly into the phone.
The phone was muffled.
“REAPER, UNLOCK THE DOOR!”
I could hear banging. Kim was going to wake up the whole clubhouse. Was she even thinking about Tyson?
“WHAT, KIM? I just got Tyson to sleep!”
That voice. Oh my god, that voice. It settled my nerves. It gave me the willpower to keep fighting. God, I wished things were different. Just hearing it was like being welcomed home. He was fine. He was breathing. Tyson was sleeping. He mightn’t be now, after Kim’s attack on the door and the shouting.
“It’s Abby.”
“What are you talking about?” Reaper sounded frustrated, like he was raw on nerves. I knew that tone. He wasn’t coping. He was more Reaper than Kade. Regardless, he was still the man I loved.
“NO, on the PHONE!”
“What do you mean?” He sounded completely confused and tired. Actually, he sounded exhausted. Like he was dealing with too much and it was taking a toll. That was my fault. My eyes squinted shut. I knew this was a stressful situation and I was expecting a lot of him.
“ABBY IS ON THE PHONE! God, are you stupid? Here. Talk to her.”
“What the fuck are you going on about, Kim?” Kade sounded furious.
“TAKE THE PHONE, REAPER!”
“Fine!” A muffled sound followed. “HELLO?” he basically barked into the phone. He was rude. He was harsh. He was my Reaper.
I cleared my throat. A part of me never expected to hear his voice again. What should I say? I guess start with the basics before he hung up. “Hi, Kade.”
“Abby?” The shock in his voice made me smile. Like he actually expected Kim to be playing a joke on him or that she had finally lost her marbles. It only took a couple of seconds for that shock to go, though, and the realization to kick in that he was actually talking to me. “Where the hell are you? I’m coming. You hear me? I’m coming–”
“Kade, stop! I don’t know where I am,” I groaned. “I’ve searched for an address but I have no idea and all I see are trees and a driveway. But don’t worry about me. How is Tyson?”
“What do you mean, don’t worry about you? Do you honestly expect me not to be worried?”
“Kade, answer my fucking question. How’s Tyson?” My son. I wanted to know how he was. The son I gave birth to and was ripped away from.
“He is...” Kade stopped talking. “Do you want to see him?”
Yes! Oh my god, yes! “Yes.”
“Hold on a sec.”
I looked down the driveway. Still no one there. I guess the worst that could happen was he came home, caught me and killed me. But knowing my luck, he would just beat me.
The phone vibrated and I pulled it away from my ear. Putting it on loudspeaker, I opened the message. He had grown. I smiled. He was healthy. Sleeping peacefully. Wait a sec. “Is that my...” I zoomed in. It was. “That’s my Bliss n Eso sweatshirt.”
“Yeah, he is attracted to it.” I could hear the smile in Kade’s voice.
“Well, at least he will have a good taste in music,” I laughed. “All those toys I bought him and he sleeps with my sweatshirt.” I shook my head, thinking of all those soft teddies Brad and I bought him.
“I’m hoping he still gets my taste in music.”
“And what’s wrong with him listening to rap music?”
“Just don’t want him to be completely like his mother.”
“I think he is going to be just like his father. And if you have anything to do with it, he will be taking over your charter. How are the boys?”
Kade went quiet. What wasn’t he telling me? “Kade?”
He sighed. “I took over from your father.”
“What? Of the mother charter?”
“Yes.”
I swallowed hard. No wonder he was stressed. “So you’re the president of the mother charter?”
“Yes.”
I didn’t say anything. I was trying to wrap my head around it. He hated responsibilities and this, this was bigger than Tyson and me. He could leave me. He could abandon Tyson. But once you are a mother charter president, you are that for life. Even if Dad had stepped down, he would still be looked upon as a wise figure. Normally mother charter presidents don’t step down. They are that till they die. Usually young. Usually bloody. Dad would be the first to live through the handover to another president.
“Abby, if you’re angry, just let me explain it.” It sounded like he had had this conversation within himself a million times and was expecting me to be angry about it.
He was taking my silence as anger? It wasn’t that. It was shock and something else. “I’m not mad.”
“Disappointed? I swear, Abby, I’m doing everything possible to find you. It’s not getting in the way of what is important. Which is you. I promise you nothing is coming before you–”
“Kade, stop!” I cut him off. Why would I be disappointed? There was only one feeling consuming me as I thought about him taking over from Dad. “I’m proud of you, Kade. You always hated responsibility and you have stood up and done this. I’m proud.” All those years, all he did was avoid responsibility. His fear of it always came between us.
“You are?”
I smiled. I wished I’d been there to help him make the decision. But when it came to it, he didn’t need me to help him take responsibility. “Yes, very proud.”
I could hear him let out a long breath.
“It’s still not as important as you.” He was reassuring me, but there was no need. I knew he would be there for Tyson, and the whole mother charter would be there for my son. It was how I was brought up, and if it was good enough for me, I knew it would be alright for Tyson.
“I’m going to send you something but you can’t watch it unless something happens to me. OK?” My plan from earlier resurfaced. Here was my chance to have the goodbye I wanted. “I have to go.”
“Don’t. I need you, Abby. Tyson needs you. Don’t go.”
He was pleading with me. Like I had a choice. “I have to, Kade. Promise you won’t watch the video unless something happens to me.”
“I’ll never watch it ’cause nothing is going to happen to you. Hear me, Abby. You aren’t dying.”
He was still in denial. Whether I lived or died was out of our hands now. It was in Jake’s. And I saw that tint in his eye. He wanted to kill me. He was looking forward to it. But that didn’t mean I was going to give in. He hadn’t broken me yet.
“Bye, Kade.”
“I’m not giving up on you.”
“I know.” I sat down in the office chair. “You will end up with me in the end.”
“Like I said, I know. I love you, Kade.” If this was our goodbye, it wasn’t bad. Reaper would never know the details of what Jake did to me. And that was for the best because I didn’t want him to live with that. “Oh wait, you got shot today!”
“How the hell did you know that?”
“In the shoulder?”
“Did he tell you?” Kade’s voice darkened.
I scoffed. “No. Let’s just say we have matching bullet wounds.”
“HE SHOT YOU!” I pulled the phone from my ear away from Kade’s yelling.
“Ouch, my ear!”
“He shot you? Where?”
“In the shoulder.” I looked at my bandaged shoulder. “It hurt like a bitch, but getting the bullet out was worse.”
Kade was dead silent. He didn’t say anything. “I’m going to kill him.” He was stating it, like it was going to happen. I knew deep down Reaper would get the upper hand. I just knew it would be too late for me.
“Bye, Kade.” I didn’t want to hear him pleading with me again. I couldn’t take it. I couldn’t take hearing him beg me to stay on the phone. So I took it from my ear and hung up before he could say another word.
I wiped the tears off my cheeks and got up. Looking down at the calm driveway, I saw I still had time. I had come to terms with what was going to happen. Like a man put on death row, you knew it was going to happen, that the day was coming.
But if I did it my way, I would get to say my goodbyes and end my life on my terms.
I took a few sharp breaths and wiped the remaining tears away. Time to pull on the amount of strength I had left and do this.
I had a plan and now it was time to follow it.
Jake hadn’t broken me.
I was just going to take the power from him.
Chapter 11
Reaper
I never fucking promised her, but I did tell her I would never watch it. It had been four days since I spoke to Abby. And for four fucking days, I’d been staring at my phone, tempted to watch the video. It sat in my messages, teasing me.
But I hadn’t watched it.
I blew out a mouthful of smoke. I needed her. The need was so powerful it was affecting my decisions. I wasn’t able to think clearly. All my focus was on her, finding her. Some way. Somehow. Getting her back.
I lay on the bed, staring at the white ceiling. It was dark. It was after one in the morning and I was still awake.
Tyson had gone down without any troubles tonight, which was a shame because I would rather have been up with him than lying here with my thoughts.
Fuck it.
I sat up and reached for my phone. I was watching it. There could be something in it that could help me find her.
That was my reasoning as I went through my messages to get to it. But the real reason was I needed to hear her voice. I needed to see her.
My finger hovered over the play button. Was I breaking my word to her? Yes, most likely. Still, I was going to do it. I pressed play, turning up the volume.
It was dark. I only saw blackness and then the lights came on. There she was. My purpose. The woman I loved. The mother to my son. She was there. What had that bastard done to her? I could see her bandaged shoulder. The cut lip. The bruise running from her chin, and, as she looked at something to her left, I saw it went across her cheek.
She looked back at the camera and I saw her black eye. And shit, she looked tired. Had she been sleeping? Clearly fucking not.
“Kade.” She smiled. “First off, I don’t want you to be upset or angry with yourself. I know you and I know you would have done everything possible. So no need for tears, regrets or what-ifs.”
She stopped, squaring her shoulders and sitting straight up. “Now there are a few things I want you to know now that I’m gone. You have to be strong for Tyson. I don’t want him growing up with a ghost for a father. You hear me? That isn’t acceptable. Pull your shit together and be the man I know you are.”
She got up from sitting and moved to a window, looking out it, then back at the camera. “In my room. The chest of drawers. The bottom drawer comes out. Underneath it is...” She pitched her eyes shut and took a few breaths. “There is something there for Tyson and you. I made it when I was pregnant. In case something happened to me again, like it did when I had Matthew. Also, my will is there. I had that drawn up when you were on the road. It basically just gives you back everything you have given me.” A grin spread across her face and then dropped as she remembered something. “And making sure you were the soul caretaker of Tyson. Not that I knew Tyson’s name then. But it had to be done in case Dad did something stupid.” She rolled her eyes. “He told me he was going to take my baby from you if something happened to me again. So I made a will. So if he is giving you a hard time right now, tell him to fuck off. You have my permission.” That smile I loved of hers appeared on her face again.
“I know you will find Jake and you will kill him. I have faith in you. But at the same time, Kade, if you never track him down, don’t beat yourself up about it. I’m sure fate will take care of him in the end.”
She paused looking out the window and then back at the camera. “Anyway, Jake mightn’t get his wish to kill me. There is this game we play.” She frowned and sighed. “It’s sick and twisted and I never want you to know the details. Anyway, I think there is a way I can turn it in my favor.”
She stopped talking and a look I had never wanted to see appeared on my Abby’s face. It was the one I had seen on men’s faces when they accepted that I was going to end their life.
“You heard that correctly, Kade. I’m choosing to end my life. There are two ways to do it and either way I will get it done. Please don’t be mad with me.” She was pleading with me. “I’m just not letting Jake do it. This isn’t your fault and I want you to know that. I love you and I would do everything the same way again.” The sadness and acceptance of her death disappeared from her face and she smiled. “Maybe not Hell Bound though. I might give joining the gang a miss second time around. But you, you I wouldn’t change.”
My heart tightened. No fucking way. I was frozen to the spot, too shocked to pause the video. So it kept playing.
She gave me a confident grin. “I know you will make a great mother charter president. You might even put my dad to shame. In fact, I’m hoping you do. You got this. The members, the other presidents, they will all follow your lead and I know you will be a great example.”
She rubbed a hand across her eye and sighed, looking back at the camera. “Now is the subject I didn’t want to bring up, but have to because I know you.”
She gave a look that she usually would give me before telling me off. “You can’t be a widower. Hear me say that? You don’t get that option. You opened up your heart to me so I KNOW you can do it again. I want Tyson to have a mother figure. I struggled not having my mom and I don’t want him to be grieving over what could have been. So find yourself another woman, Kade.” She arched her eyebrows. “I am ordering you to. There will be a girl out there for you. She will see what I saw in you. If not, just hook up with a club girl. Just don’t let Tyson not have a mom. And most of all, I don’t want you alone for the rest of your life because of this.”
I watched the tears well up in her eyes. “With that said, there is only one more thing to say. Which is goodbye.” She cursed and wiped a tear off her cheek. “I told myself I wouldn’t cry.” She let out a frustrated sigh. “Well, if this is it, all there is and nothing more, I want you to know I’m happy with how things turned out. I wouldn’t change it. So don’t you dare wish you could.”
She let out a long breath and looked straight into the camera. She opened and closed her hand. “Please listen to everything I’ve said and don’t ever let Tyso
n see this.” She stopped waving and bit her bottom lip, tears running down her cheeks. “Bye, Kade.”
The video stopped.
FOUR FUCKING DAYS! I wiped the tears off my cheeks and threw the phone on the bed and grabbed my jeans.
No fucking way was I letting it end like that. FOUR DAYS! FOUR DAYS I HAD WASTED! The thought that she might have already done it consumed me, taking the breath from my lungs.
I pulled on my jeans. Put on my rings, stuffed my wallet in my pocket and got my bike keys.
Opening the door, I picked up my pace to Kim’s room. FOUR FUCKING DAYS! I banged on her door.
“Kim?” I opened up her door and flicked on the lights.
“What the hell, Reaper?” She shielded her eyes from the lights.
“I need you to go to my room and look after Tyson.”
“What, now?” She sat up in bed and looked at the clock next to her bedside. “It’s ten past two in the morning. Where are you going? Why aren’t you asleep?”
“Can you do it or not?”
“I’m getting up.” She threw the blankets back, grumbled something about me being like a patient in the insane asylum and grabbed her clothes.
“I don’t have my phone. If you need me, call Brad.” I left her while she headed for my room. And I headed up the hall and round the corner till I was at Brad’s door.
I banged on it. Impatient, I opened it up and wasn’t surprised to find him with a girl.
“What the fuck is going on?” the girl yelled.
I didn’t really give two shits about waking her up.
“Brad, I need you up and ready to go,” I basically yelled over the whining bitch. She was still going on and trying to get the blanket from Brad to cover herself.
“What, now?” Brad squinted at me. “It’s late, bro.”
“I need you on your bike. I’ve got a message I need to get out.”
“What? That you are a crazy person, going around waking people up at...” he looked at his phone, “two in the morning?”
“No. It’s about Abby.”
Brad’s annoyed expression dropped. “Fine. Getting up,” he said before throwing the blankets back and picking up his pants.