Men in spacesuits sweated with heavy reaction units – tricky work, this – until the airlocks had registered and could be coupled together. The outer doors slid aside and the air in the locks mingled, fresh with the foul. As the mate of the Hercules waited, oxygen cylinder in hand, he wondered what condition the survivor would be in. Then the Star Queen’s inner door slid open.
For a moment, the two men stood looking at each other across the short corridor that now connected the two airlocks. The mate was surprised and a little disappointed to find that he felt no particular sense of drama.
So much had happened to make this moment possible that its actual achievement was almost an anticlimax even in the instant when it was slipping into the past. He wished – for he was an incurable romantic – that he could think of something memorable to say, some ‘Doctor Livingstone, I presume?’ phrase that would pass into history.
But all he actually said was, ‘Well, McNeil, I’m pleased to see you.’
Though he was considerably thinner and somewhat haggard, McNeil had stood the ordeal well. He breathed gratefully the blast of raw oxygen and rejected the idea that he might like to lie down and sleep. As he explained, he had done very little but sleep for the last week to conserve air. The first mate looked relieved. He had been afraid he might have to wait for the story.
The cargo was being trans-shipped and the other two tugs were climbing up from the great blinding crescent of Venus while McNeil retraced the events of the last few weeks and the mate made surreptitious notes.
He spoke quite calmly and impersonally, as if he were relating some adventure that had happened to another person, or indeed had never happened at all. Which was, of course, to some extent the case, though it would be unfair to suggest that McNeil was telling any lies.
He invented nothing, but he omitted a good deal. He had had three weeks in which to prepare his narrative and he did not think it had any flaws—
Grant had already reached the door when McNeil called softly after him, ‘What’s the hurry? I thought we had something to discuss.’
Grant grabbed at the doorway to halt his headlong flight. He turned slowly and stared unbelievingly at the engineer. McNeil should be already dead – but he was sitting quite comfortably, looking at him with a most peculiar expression.
‘Sit down,’ he said sharply – and in that moment it suddenly seemed that all authority had passed to him. Grant did so, quite without volition. Something had gone wrong, though what it was he could not imagine.
The silence in the control-room seemed to last for ages. Then McNeil said rather sadly, ‘I’d hoped better of you, Grant.’
At last Grant found his voice, though he could barely recognise it.
‘What do you mean?’ he whispered.
‘What do you think I mean?’ replied McNeil, with what seemed no more than a mild irritation. ‘This little attempt of yours to poison me, of course.’
Grant’s tottering world collapsed at last, but he no longer cared greatly one way or the other. McNeil began to examine his beautifully kept fingernails with some attention.
‘As a matter of interest,’ he said, in the way that one might ask the time, ‘when did you decide to kill me?’
The sense of unreality was so overwhelming that Grant felt he was acting a part, that this had nothing to do with real life at all.
‘Only this morning,’ he said, and believed it.
‘Hmm,’ remarked McNeil, obviously without much conviction. He rose to his feet and moved over to the medicine chest. Grant’s eyes followed him as he fumbled in the compartment and came back with the little poison bottle. It still appeared to be full. Grant had been careful about that.
‘I suppose I should get pretty mad about this whole business,’ McNeil continued conversationally, holding the bottle between thumb and forefinger. ‘But somehow I’m not. Maybe it’s because I never had many illusions about human nature. And, of course, I saw it coming a long time ago.’
Only the last phrase really reached Grant’s consciousness.
‘You – saw it coming?’
‘Heavens, yes! You’re too transparent to make a good criminal, I’m afraid. And now that your little plot’s failed it leaves us both in an embarrassing position, doesn’t it?’
To this masterly understatement there seemed no possible reply.
‘By rights,’ continued the engineer thoughtfully, ‘I should now work myself up into a temper, call Venus Central, and renounce you to the authorities. But it would be a rather pointless thing to do, and I’ve never been much good at losing my temper anyway. Of course, you’ll say that’s because I’m too lazy – but I don’t think so.’
He gave Grant a twisted smile.
‘Oh, I know what you think about me – you’ve got me neatly classified in that orderly mind of yours, haven’t you? I’m soft and self-indulgent, I haven’t any moral courage – or any morals for that matter – and I don’t give a damn for anyone but myself. Well, I’m not denying it. Maybe it’s ninety per cent true. But the odd ten per cent is mighty important, Grant!’
Grant felt in no condition to indulge in psychological analysis, and this seemed hardly the time for anything of the sort. Besides, he was still obsessed with the problem of his failure and the mystery of McNeil’s continued existence. McNeil, who knew this perfectly well, seemed in no hurry to satisfy his curiosity.
‘Well, what do you intend to do now?’ Grant asked, anxious to get it over.
‘I would like,’ said McNeil calmly, ‘to carry on our discussion where it was interrupted by the coffee.’
‘You don’t mean—’
‘But I do. Just as if nothing had happened.’
‘That doesn’t make sense. You’ve got something up your sleeve!’ cried Grant.
McNeil sighed. He put down the poison bottle and looked firmly at Grant.
‘You’re in no position to accuse me of plotting anything. To repeat my earlier remarks, I am suggesting that we decide which one of us shall take poison – only we don’t want any more unilateral decisions. Also’ – he picked up the bottle again – ‘it will be the real thing this time. The stuff in here merely leaves a bad taste in the mouth.’
A light was beginning to dawn in Grant’s mind. ‘You changed the poison!’
‘Naturally. You may think you’re a good actor, Grant, but frankly – from the stalls – I thought the performance stank. I could tell you were plotting something, probably before you knew it yourself. In the last few days I’ve deloused the ship pretty thoroughly. Thinking of all the ways you might have done me in was quite amusing and helped to pass the time. The poison was so obvious that it was the first thing I fixed. But I rather overdid the danger signals and nearly gave myself away when I took the first sip. Salt doesn’t go at all well with coffee.’
He gave that wry grin again. ‘Also, I’d hoped for something more subtle. So far I’ve found fifteen infallible ways of murdering anyone aboard a spaceship. But I don’t propose to describe them now.’
This was fantastic, Grant thought. He was being treated, not like a criminal, but like a rather stupid schoolboy who hadn’t done his homework properly.
‘Yet you’re still willing,’ said Grant unbelievingly, ‘to start all over again? And you’d take the poison yourself if you lost?’
McNeil was silent for a long time. Then he began slowly, ‘I can see that you still don’t believe me. It doesn’t fit at all nicely into your tidy little picture, does it? But perhaps I can make you understand. It’s really quite simple.
‘I’ve enjoyed life, Grant, without many scruples or regrets – but the better part of it’s over now and I don’t cling to what’s left as desperately as you might imagine. Yet while I am alive I’m rather particular about some things.
‘It may surprise you to know that I’ve got any ideals at all. But I have, Grant – I’ve always tried to act like a civilised rational being. I’ve not always succeeded. When I’ve failed I’ve tried to redeem myself.’
/>
He paused, and when he resumed it was as though he, and not Grant, was on the defensive. ‘I’ve never exactly liked you, Grant, but I’ve often admired you and that’s why I’m sorry it’s come to this. I admired you most of all the day the ship was holed.’
For the first time, McNeil seemed to have some dificulty in choosing his words. When he spoke again he avoided Grant’s eyes.
‘I didn’t behave too well then. Something happened that I thought was impossible. I’ve always been quite sure that I’d never lose my nerve but – well – it was so sudden it knocked me over.’
He attempted to hide his embarrassment by humour. ‘The same sort of thing happened on my very first trip. I was sure I’d never be spacesick – and as a result I was much worse than if I had not been over-confident. But I got over it then – and again this time. It was one of the biggest surprises of my life, Grant, when I saw that you of all people were beginning to crack.
‘Oh, yes – the business of wines! I can see you’re thinking about that. Well, that’s one thing I don’t regret. I said I’ve always tried to act like a civilised man – and a civilised man should always know when to get drunk. But perhaps you wouldn’t understand.’
Oddly enough, that was just what Grant was beginning to do. He had caught his first real glimpse of McNeil’s intricate and tortuous personality and realised how utterly he had misjudged him. No – misjudged was not the right word. In many ways his judgement had been correct. But it had only touched the surface – he had never suspected the depths that lay beneath.
In a moment of insight that had never come before, and from the nature of things could never come again, Grant understood the reasons behind McNeil’s action. This was nothing so simple as a coward trying to reinstate himself in the eyes of the world, for no one need ever know what happened aboard the Star Queen.
In any case, McNeil probably cared nothing for the world’s opinion, thanks to the sleek self-sufficiency that had so often annoyed Grant. But that very self-sufficiency meant that at all costs he must preserve his own good opinion of himself. Without it life would not be worth living – and McNeil had never accepted life save on his own terms.
The engineer was watching him intently and must have guessed that Grant was coming near the truth, for he suddenly changed his tone as though he was sorry he had revealed so much of his character.
‘Don’t think I get a quixotic pleasure from turning the other cheek,’ he said. ‘Just consider it from the point of view of pure logic. After all, we’ve got to come to some agreement.
‘Has it occurred to you that if only one of us survives without a covering message from the other, he’ll have a very uncomfortable time explaining just what happened?’
In his blind fury, Grant had completely forgotten this. But he did not believe it bulked at all important in McNeil’s own thoughts.
‘Yes,’ he said, ‘I suppose you’re right.’
He felt far better now. All the hate drained out of him and he was at peace. The truth was known and he had accepted it. That it was so different from what he had imagined did not seem to matter now.
‘Well, let’s get it over,’ he said unemotionally. ‘There’s a new pack of cards lying around somewhere.’
‘I think we’d better speak to Venus first – both of us,’ replied McNeil, with peculiar emphasis. ‘We want a complete agreement on record in case anyone asks awkward questions later.’
Grant nodded absently. He did not mind very much now one way or the other. He even smiled, ten minutes later, as he drew his card from the pack and laid it, face upwards, beside McNeil’s.
‘So that’s the whole story, is it?’ said the first mate, wondering how soon he could decently get to the transmitter.
‘Yes,’ said McNeil evenly, ‘that’s all there was to it.’
The mate bit his pencil, trying to frame the next question. ‘And I suppose Grant took it all quite calmly?’
The captain gave him a glare, which he avoided, and McNeil looked at him coldly as if he could see through the sensation-mongering headlines ranged behind. He got to his feet and moved over to the observation port.
‘You heard his broadcast, didn’t you? Wasn’t that calm enough?’
The mate sighed. It still seemed hard to believe that in such circumstances two men could have behaved in so reasonable, so unemotional a manner. He could have pictured all sorts of dramatic possibilities – sudden outbursts of insanity, even attempts at murder. Yet according to McNeil nothing at all had happened. It was too bad.
McNeil was speaking again, as if to himself. ‘Yes, Grant behaved very well – very well indeed. It was a great pity—’
Then he seemed to lose himself in the ever-fresh, incomparable glory of the approaching planet. Not far beneath, and coming closer by kilometres every second, the snow-white crescent arms of Venus spanned more than half the sky. Down there were life and warmth and civilisation – and air.
The future, which not long ago had seemed contracted to a point, had opened out again into all its unknown possibilities and wonders. But behind him McNeil could sense the eyes of his rescuers, probing, questioning – yes, and condemning too.
All his life he would hear whispers. Voices would be saying behind his back, ‘Isn’t that the man who—?’
He did not care. For once in his life at least, he had done something of which he could feel unashamed. Perhaps one day his own pitiless self-analysis would strip bare the motives behind his actions, would whisper in his ear. ‘Altruism? Don’t be a fool! You did it to bolster up your own good opinion of yourself – so much more important than anyone else’s!’
But the perverse maddening voices, which all his life had made nothing seem worth while, were silent for the moment and he felt content. He had reached the calm at the centre of the hurricane. While it lasted he would enjoy it to the full.
Nemesis
First published in Super Science Stories, March 1950, as ‘Exile of the Eons’
Collected in Expedition to Earth
Already the mountains were trembling with the thunder that only man can make. But here the war seemed very far away, for the full moon hung over the ageless Himalayas and the furies of the battle were still hidden below the edge of the world. Not for long would they so remain. The Master knew that the last remnants of his fleet were being hurled from the sky as the circle of death closed in upon his stronghold.
In a few hours at the most, the Master and his dreams of empire would have vanished into the maelstrom of the past. Nations would still curse his name, but they would no longer fear it. Later, even the hatred would be gone and he would mean no more to the world than Hitler or Napoleon or Genghis Khan. Like them he would be a blurred figure far down the infinite corridor of time, dwindling towards oblivion. For a little while his name would dwell in the uncertain land between history and fable; then the world would think of him no more. He would be one with the nameless legions who had died to work his will.
Far to the south, a mountain suddenly edged with violet flame. Ages later, the balcony on which the Master stood shuddered beneath the impact of the ground-wave racing through the rocks below. Later still, the air brought the echo of a mammoth concussion. Surely they could not be so close already! The Master hoped it was no more than a stray torpedo that had swept through the contracting battle line. If it were not, time was even shorter than he feared.
The Chief of Staff walked out from the shadows and joined him by the rail. The Marshal’s hard face – the second most hated in all the world – was lined and beaded with sweat. He had not slept for days and his once gaudy uniform hung limply upon him. Yet his eyes, though unutterably weary, were still resolute even in defeat. He stood in silence, awaiting his last orders. Nothing else was left for him to do.
Thirty miles away, the eternal snow-plume of Everest flamed a lurid red, reflecting the glare of some colossal fire below the horizon. Still the Master neither moved nor gave any sign. Not until a salvo of torpedoes passed
high overhead with a demon wail did he at last turn and, with one backward glance at the world he would see no more, descend into the depths.
The lift dropped a thousand feet and the sound of battle died away. As he stepped out of the shaft, the Master paused for a moment to press a hidden switch. The Marshal even smiled when he heard the crash of falling rock far above, and knew that both pursuit and escape were equally impossible.
As of old, the handful of generals sprang to their feet when the Master entered the room. He ran his eyes round the table. They were all there; even at the last there had been no traitors. He walked to his accustomed place in silence, steeling himself for the last and the hardest speech he would ever have to make. Burning into his soul he could feel the eyes of the men he had led to ruin. Behind and beyond them he could see the squadrons, the divisions, the armies whose blood was on his hands. And more terrible still were the silent spectres of the nations that now could never be born.
At last he began to speak. The hypnosis of his voice was as powerful as ever, and after a few words he became once more the perfect, implacable machine whose destiny was destruction.
‘This, gentlemen, is the last of all our meetings. There are no more plans to make, no more maps to study. Somewhere above our heads the fleet we built with such pride and care is fighting to the end. In a few minutes, not one of all those thousands of machines will be left in the sky.
‘I know that for all of us here surrender is unthinkable, even if it were possible, so in this room you will shortly have to die. You have served our cause well and deserved better, but it was not to be. Yet I do not wish you to think that we have wholly failed. In the past, as you saw many times, my plans were always ready for anything that might arise, no matter how improbable. You should not, therefore, be surprised to learn that I was prepared even for defeat.’
Collected Stories Of Arthur C. Clarke Page 28