by Dinah Harper
“Stop playing with me.” He made her into his plaything and she resented it with every fiber of her being. “I’m a person, not a fuck doll.”
He frowned. “I don’t think of you like that.”
“Then why are you doing this?”
“Because you’re lying to yourself. Your mouth spits lies, but your body speaks the truth. Forget everything and just feel, Violet.”
When he applied pressure to the right spot, she tossed her head back and forth. His thrusts became more forceful. Her head spun as he kissed her, applying layer after layer of sensation until she forgot to hate him.
“Tell me you want me.”
His voice came from a long way off. She didn’t focus on it. She was almost there… He gripped her face and gave it a sharp shake.
“Look at me,” he ordered.
It took considerable effort to obey his dictate when her body was ready for take-off. When she focused on him, his grip gentled and he stroked her cheek.
“Tell me, Violet.”
“What?” She sent her hand down her body to finish the job, but he captured it and twined their fingers together.
“No touching yourself. That’s my job.”
“You’re not doing it!” she spat.
He gave her a pained grin. “Frustrated, Vi?”
“I hate you!”
He kissed the corner of her mouth. “You need to stop saying that.”
“You need to stop torturing me,” she panted and lifted her leg to change the way he was fucking her. “Uh, yes.”
“You know it isn’t like this with anyone else.” His breath hitched as she moved on him. He gripped her waist to stop her, but then he groaned and buried his face in her hair. “Fuck me. This is how it’s supposed to be between us.”
When he increased the tempo, tears leaked out of the corner of her eyes.
He glared at her with stormy eyes. “You feel that, Vi? This is bliss. There’s nothing else like it on the planet. No one comes close for either of us. Admit it.”
Her head thrashed as the crescendo built.
“Please,” she begged.
“Please what?”
She let out an enraged bellow and threw herself at him. The only reason she got him on his back was because he wasn’t expecting it. He clamped his hands on her to stop her from getting away, but that wasn’t her goal. She straddled him and braced her hands on his chest. She tipped her head back and mindlessly rode him for her own pleasure. She was too lost to care what she looked like with her hair loose, mouth open as she gasped and moaned. When lightning struck, she screamed. He yanked her down and covered her mouth with his. His hands on her ass spread her wide as he began to thrust. When her second orgasm hit, she pounded her fist into the mattress while he let out a loud, guttural groan and said her name.
She slumped over him in a state of satiated shock. It had never been this good. Even as the thought crossed her mind, she shook her head.
“Okay?” he murmured.
As she shifted, his hands smoothed down her back.
“Wait.”
“We need to get going.”
He kissed her neck. “We’re close to home. We have time,” he said in a lazy voice.
His hand sifted through her hair, reminding her of the times he had braided it or played with it while they watched TV. Her eyes stung as the past and present clashed. She missed this part of him. The gentle, affectionate Jesse who made her feel loved and protected. It had been so long since someone touched her like this. She didn’t allow anyone close enough to coddle her. Even as she longed for her innocent past, she was aware of his dick still throbbing inside her and the smell of sex permeating the air. There was no going back.
“What’s wrong?” he rumbled.
“Everything,” she whispered.
She grunted as he rolled her beneath him. He braced himself over her and smoothed her tangled hair back from her face.
“Don’t cry,” he ordered roughly as he kissed away her tears.
She placed her hand on his chest. “We can’t keep doing this.”
He sat up. She moaned as he withdrew from her. He knelt between her spread thighs. She wasn’t surprised when his hand slid inside her.
“I want to be a good man. In every aspect of my life I’m a model citizen.” His eyes flicked up to hers. “Except when it comes to you.”
She tried to scoot away, but he gripped her hip, warning her to stay still.
“I’ve broken laws, vows, and my own code to have you. I thought I had it under control, that I would see you after all this time and feel nothing.” He shook his head as he looked down at his fingers sunk inside her. “One look at you and I knew nothing would stop me. I had to touch, taste. I’d pay any price to possess you.” He pressed his face against her belly. “I need, Violet.”
His fingers stroked and her toes curled.
“Mom’s days are numbered and all I can think about is losing myself in you.” His voice was so low, she could barely understand him. “Love me back, Vi.”
An invisible pick pierced her chest and sank deep. “What?”
He lifted his head, blue eyes spearing hers. “I’ve been in love with you since I was fourteen.”
Her body reacted before her mind could process his words. Her foot landed on his shoulder and with one kick, sent him reeling back. She rolled off the bed and faced him with her hands clenched into fists.
“How dare you say that to me? You don’t know the meaning of that word!”
“I know exactly what it means.”
“You don’t love me! If you did, you wouldn’t have done all this!” She jabbed her finger at the bed. “This is sex, not love. It’s lust, greed, sinful…”
“You see it the way you want to.”
She stomped her foot. “I see it the way it is! You took what you had no right to take! And you’re still taking! You stole everything from me and have the nerve to say you loved me?”
He shrugged. “Love can make monsters out of men when it’s not returned.”
Her mind went completely blank. There was no sound in the room aside from her ragged breathing, but inside, she was in the eye of an emotional storm. Before her mind could bolt, she held up a hand. “No.”
“No?”
He was a master manipulator and pathological liar. She wasn’t going to play into his hands. He was messing with her again. He wasn’t satisfied with owning her body, he wanted her mind too. Fuck that.
“I’m going to shower,” she announced. “And then we’re leaving.”
She averted her face as she headed to the bathroom. She locked the door, climbed into the shower, and stared at the yellowed walls as water beat down on her head.
After everything he had done to her, he dared utter that word? He thought that word absolved him of his crimes? Justified his actions? No. Love had no place in their relationship and she’d be damned if she trusted anything that came out of his mouth.
She stepped out of the tub and wrapped a towel around her hair and then her body. She glanced at the door. She didn’t want to go out there. He was such a fucker. He was making an already bad situation even worse. They had five hours left until they reached Austin, but even ten more minutes in his presence was too long. She had dreaded facing him and convinced herself that it couldn’t be as bad as she imagined. It was worse. He was determined to bring up a past she buried long ago. Her jaw ached from clenching her teeth. He thought she was stupid enough to believe he had feelings for her. She wasn’t naive. He stole her innocence years ago.
She took a deep breath and put her shoulders back. Five more hours. She could do this. She had to. She got through the worst of the trip yesterday. They were so close to home. Lynne and Dad were waiting on them. She could withstand anything he wanted to throw at her and then it would be over.
She yanked open the door with a defiant scowl, but her bravado was for nothing. He was sitting on the bed talking to Lynne on his cell phone.
“We needed
some rest so we got a room for the night,” he said.
His voice was lighthearted and back to its normal cadence—further proof that he was toying with her. No man who truly meant the things Jesse claimed would be able to play this off. He was a class act. She wasn’t going to fall for it.
“I’m glad you two are being so responsible and doing this trip safely,” Lynne said while on speaker.
“Safe is my middle name.”
She cast him a disgusted look as she knelt beside her duffel. He pulled on jeans, but didn’t bother to button them. She couldn’t resist giving his body a once over. Yes, she’d fucked him numerous times since she picked him up from the airport, but she had always been focused more on fighting him than taking in his body. He was ripped. He’d always had a nice body since he was a natural athlete and liked to run in the mornings and afternoons. Before he’d been broad and lean and now he was just… huge. He had defined abs and the veins stood out on his arms. There wasn’t an ounce of fat on him. He could be Captain America’s double.
If she took a picture of him right now, it would be the perfect ad for a male gigolo. His jeans rode low on his hips, hair tousled, and the wrecked bed behind him told its own story. Women would pay well for one night with him. Actually, if he had on his uniform, he could make even more money. Another career path if he decided to leave the military.
“We’re going to grab breakfast before we head out and be home by late afternoon,” he said.
His tone warm and easy. He was back to being the good son while her well-used body still throbbed from his attention. Seriously? She wanted to hurl her shoe at his head.
“Knowing you’re there with Violet makes us feel so much better. Have you two been having fun?” Lynne asked
“Yes.”
Her teeth ground together when he told what whopping lie.
“We’ve been taking in the sights and talking about the past.”
She whipped her head around and their eyes locked.
“I’m so glad we have this time together,” he said and winked at her.
“Fuck you,” she mouthed and he smiled.
“Here, talk to Vi. I need to take a shower and feed her. She’s grumpy.”
He tossed the phone on her duffel before he wandered into the bathroom. Motherfucker.
“Violet?”
Lightheaded with rage, she tried to gentle her voice as she said, “Hey, Mom. How are you?”
“I’m good. I’ve been worried about you two, but knowing you’re in Texas makes me feel better. You haven’t been taking much pictures.”
She cleared her throat. “Yeah, no. Sorry. It’s been super hectic.”
“I’m sure. You two got everything wrapped up so quickly. I’m so glad. Just a little further and then you’ll be home.”
“Right,” she said as she got dressed.
“I’m not trying to be pushy, but what do you think about heading to Florida the day after tomorrow? Is that too soon? Did you want to get settled before—”
“No, that sounds perfect. Let’s head to the beach.” She needed as much activity as possible.
“Yay! We’re on the same wavelength.”
Her anger was tempered by Lynne’s excitement and good cheer. Just hearing her mom’s voice made her feel better. Lynne was an anchor in her otherwise messed up world. All she wanted to do was curl up beside Lynne and just be. It was fucked up that she needed comfort from her mom when she should be giving it, but she felt so fucking lost and needed her more than ever.
“I can’t wait to come home,” she said.
“Me either. Having both of my babies’ home…” Lynne’s voice hitched suspiciously.
She walked to the window as she heard the shower cut off in the bathroom.
“Don’t, Mom,” she begged.
“I know, I’m sorry,” Lynne said and could hear her smiling through the tears. “I’m just so happy. You two are my world.”
She swallowed hard. “And you’re mine.”
“Well, you’ll be here soon enough. Take pictures, have fun, and be safe.”
“I love you.”
“I love you more,” Lynne said with a sniffle. “I’ll see you soon.”
As she hung up, she saw that Jesse had over fifty unread text messages. She, in comparison, had no messages aside from the group texts with her parents and Reese and Meg. Hopefully after she moved home, she would get reacquainted with classmates and beef up her social life. No more living in the past, no more isolating herself because of Jesse. No. She was going to live and it started now.
Nine
Jesse came out of the bathroom as she repacked her duffel. “There’s a diner next door.”
“I’m not hungry.”
“You’re eating.”
She swung around to yell at him and immediately turned away. He was buck naked. The view from the back was just as good as the front. Contoured thighs, ass, back. She had never been one to goggle at men’s bodies, but his was phenomenal. There was a saying, “Never trust a pretty face.” Usually it was applied to women, but in her case, her step-brother was the epitome of pretty outside, ugly insides.
She was miffed that by the time she had zipped her bag, he was dressed and ready to go with his pack on his shoulder. He held open the door for her. As she passed, she averted her face so she didn’t have to look at him before she marched across the mostly empty parking lot. It was a sunny day without a cloud in the sky. When she tried to climb in the cab, he grabbed the waistband of her pants and yanked her back out.
“Eat,” he said.
She smacked his hand. “I told you—”
She grit her teeth as he tossed her duffel and his pack in and locked the truck.
“We don’t have time for this,” she snapped.
“We do and I’m hungry,” he said as he pushed her toward the diner.
She had no choice. The diner was hopping. The moment she stepped through the door the smell of bacon and maple syrup made her stomach rumble. She and Jesse waited while a frazzled waitress checked for an open table.
“We can sit at the counter,” Jesse offered.
“All right. Make yourselves at home,” the waitress said.
Jesse’s hand landed on her lower back. She quickly stepped away and gave him a withering look before she navigated through the cramped, packed diner. The counter was occupied mostly by trucker’s and old men chatting over their morning coffee. They found a spot between two sets of men who did double takes when she took a seat. She grabbed the menu and perused it before she glanced at the old man beside her who was staring openly.
“Morning,” she said.
“It’s a good one,” he said with a wink.
She relaxed and tapped the menu. “What’s good?”
“Depends what you got a hankering for,” he drawled.
“I want something sweet and salty.”
He grinned. “You’re my kind of gal. You should get French toast with some meat on the side.”
“That sounds great.”
When she opened the menu, he pointed out her options.
“Thanks,” she said as the waitress stepped up.
“What’ll you have?”
When she gave her order, the old man gave her a thumbs up before he turned back to his friend who was reading a newspaper and munching on toast.
“You military?”
She glanced to the right to see the burly trucker beside Jesse looking him up and down.
“Yeah. Air Force,” Jesse said.
The man tipped his hat. “Thank you for your service.”
She was surprised, pleased, and then annoyed when they launched into military talk. Jesse couldn’t go anywhere without being acknowledged, honored, and admired. The men around them were all listening and nodding as he explained where he had been stationed and his last two years in remote Alaska. She didn’t want to listen, but it was impossible not to when he was sitting right beside her. She was intrigued despite herself as he told stories about
the men in his unit, the friends he’d lost, and that he was heading to Japan next.
“Is this your lady?” one of the truckers asked.
She whipped her head around, mouth full of French toast. Jesse glanced at her and his eyes crinkled at the corners when he saw her dilemma.
“Yeah,” he said as he rubbed her back. “This is Violet.”
“You got a good man here, miss. Not many guys still have old-fashioned values nowadays. You better hang onto him.” The trucker shook Jesse’s hand and left with his buddies.
She swallowed and glared at Jesse as he ate his omelet. “Really?”
He stabbed a piece of French toast and ate it before she could stop him. “These are good.”
“You’re such an ass,” she hissed.
He examined her for a moment. “You didn’t get your coffee. That’s why you’re cranky.”
Her mouth sagged. He used the L word, fucked her again, told strangers she was his, and didn’t think she had grounds to be upset? “You’re a goddamn psycho.”
He glanced at his watch. “Finish your food. I want to be on the road within the hour.”
She hopped off her stool and held out her hand. “Give me the keys. I’ll wait in the truck.”
“It’s hot,” he said.
“I don’t care!”
He dropped the keys in her hand. She stalked out of the diner and realized halfway across the parking lot that he had picked up another tab for her. Oh well. She climbed into the cab, rolled down the windows, and waited. He was right. It was hot, uncomfortably so. If she didn’t give a damn, she would have run the air conditioner, but she didn’t want to waste fuel. Apparently, she still had a conscience, unlike him.
She texted her friends to let them know she would reach Austin in a few hours and watched the morning traffic ebb and flow. She was sweating and starting to wonder if he was making her wait on purpose when she saw him striding toward her. Relieved, she started up the truck and leaned toward the vents to cool down.
“Here.”
She glanced at him and blinked when she saw that he was holding an iced coffee. She took it and gave it a wary sniff.