Had he imagined it? No, he hadn’t. His hand tingled from the memory of her warm touch. “I’m sorry, Ruth. I didn’t know that was going to happen.”
“I must have put it in wrong. Or the wood weakened from the pressure of holding it up all day.” She turned away from him. “Or . . .”
The way her voice faded pulled at him. It wasn’t like her to express self-doubt. “Ruth.” He touched her shoulder, not caring if she shrugged him off. When she didn’t, he asked, “Did something happen today?”
She shook her head, then turned around, her expression strained. “I said everything’s fine.”
“It doesn’t seem that way.” He dropped his hand from her shoulder. “Is there anything I can do to help?”
Ruth opened her mouth, but nothing came out. She pressed her lips together and shook her head. “I’ve got to geh.” She brushed past him and hurried to her desk, grabbed her purse, then ran out the door.
Puzzled, he walked to her desk, noticing she’d left her satchel and glasses behind. Not to mention the door wide open. That wasn’t like Ruth at all.
He picked up her glasses and gently folded the arms, taking care not to touch the lenses. Something was going on with Ruth, and he intended to find out what.
Chapter 11
I told you I’d come pick you up.” Stephen cast a glance at Ruth as he started the buggy moving again. “Why were you walking home?”
Ruth didn’t answer him right away. She’d walked almost a mile down the road when she saw Stephen heading toward her. He pulled over and she ran to the buggy. But maybe she should have kept going instead. She’d been walking to avoid Zachariah and his questions, only to have to hear them from Stephen. She closed her eyes. Would this day never end?
“Ruth, what’s going on?”
“Nix.” How many times did she have to say that before someone would understand?
“I don’t believe you. I know mei glee schwester and—”
“Don’t call me that! I’m not a kinn, I’m a grown woman!” She balled her fists and fought the burning pain in her throat.
“I’m sorry.” Stephen’s deep voice was nearly inaudible. “I didn’t mean anything by it.”
She knew he didn’t, but right now she was so upset she couldn’t speak. From the time she forgot her key, the entire day had spiraled into a waking nightmare. After Jacob left, she’d had to keep two brothers from fighting with each other, she caught one girl copying math answers from the boy sitting next to her, and little Lori Fisher frequently burst into tears because she missed her mami. By the end of the day she hadn’t completed a single objective in her lesson plan, and she was ready to drop with exhaustion. If she couldn’t be successful on her first day, how was she going to manage her classroom for an entire school term?
And then there was Zachariah Bender. As if her reaction to him this morning hadn’t been enough, this afternoon she had to fight more conflicting emotions than she knew what to do with. His offer to replace the window, the way he snatched her hand before the window slammed on it, the low, concerned tone of his voice when he asked her if she was okay. She’d even squeezed his hand! She’d never touched a man’s hand before, much less squeezed one while wishing she didn’t have to let go. None of it made any sense.
“Ruth? I really am sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
She looked at her brother, taking in the uncomfortable expression on his face. It was unfair for her to take her frustration out on him. “I know, Stephen. I’ve just had a bad day.”
He paused. “Want to talk about it?”
“Nee.”
“Okay. But if you do, let me know.” He gave her an encouraging smile and focused on the road ahead.
She leaned back in the seat and closed her eyes. They flew open a second later when she realized she’d left her satchel at the schoolhouse. And the notebooks she was supposed to grade. And her glasses. They were halfway home by now, so she couldn’t ask Stephen to turn around, even though he probably would if she did. She would have to trust that Zachariah would lock the schoolhouse. After all, he had been keeping his word lately. She said a quick prayer that he would remember.
By the time they reached home, she had calmed down, for the most part. Tonight she would regroup and make sure she was completely prepared, key and all. Then she would try to relax a little bit. But that thought flew out of her head when she remembered Jacob Kline. She had to talk to his parents tonight. Walking out of school the way he did today was inexcusable. She turned to Stephen. “Are you using the buggy tonight?”
“Ya. I’m going to the Coblentzes’ again. Moses has had a hard time of it lately.”
Ruth’s mood turned even more somber. The problems of her life were insignificant compared to losing a loved one.
Stephen made a right turn onto their road. “Why?”
“I have to geh somewhere after supper.” She didn’t want to reveal the details, and she was glad he didn’t ask for them.
“I know Mami and Daed are planning to visit Aaron and Elisabeth tonight.” Stephen scratched his cheek. “Where do you have to geh? Maybe I can drop you off ?” When she told him he shook his head. “That’s in the opposite direction of the Coblentzes’ farm. Do you have to geh die nacht?”
“I guess not.” Hopefully Jacob would be in school tomorrow and the two of them could work this out. Perhaps she wouldn’t have to get his parents involved just yet, although she fully intended to let them know about his behavior as soon as she could.
After Stephen left, her parents invited her to come with them to Aaron and Elisabeth’s, but she wasn’t in the mood. Once they were gone, she went upstairs and tried to relax, but she couldn’t, her mind still racing from the day. Her bedroom suddenly became stifling, and she went downstairs to the front porch and sat in the swing, hoping the fresh air of the evening would help. She’d been there only a few minutes when a buggy turned into her driveway, pulled by a chestnut-colored horse with a white spot between her eyes. Maggie.
She left the swing and met Zachariah as he pulled his buggy to a stop. “What are you doing here?”
He looked at her, a smirk on his face. “Hello to you too.”
Her cheeks heated. “I’m sorry. I’m just surprised to see you.”
“I was on my way home and thought you might be needing this.” He handed her the satchel through the buggy opening. “Your glasses and the notebooks are in there too.”
She took it from him, shocked. “Danki. You didn’t have to make a special trip out here.”
“I didn’t mind. It’s a nice evening. I figured you didn’t mean to leave that stuff behind.”
She wasn’t sure what to say. Who would have thought Zachariah Bender could be so considerate? She certainly hadn’t. “I did need these. I can’t read without my glasses.”
“Then I’m glad I got them to you.” He smiled.
Earlier in the day she had marveled at his eyes, but they were nothing compared to his smile. Her stomach started fluttering and her mouth suddenly went dry, as if she’d had sawdust for dessert.
“Well, now that I’ve made my delivery, I’ll be on my way.” But as he reached for the reins, she decided she didn’t want him to go.
“Would you like some lemonade? Mami just made some before she and Daed left to visit Elisabeth. It’s appeditlich.”
His brow lifted. “Danki, I am thirsty. I’ll take some for the road.”
“Actually, I wondered if you might like to stay. For a little bit,” she quickly added, surprised by her boldness. Where had that invitation come from?
He hesitated for a moment. “I guess . . . sure.”
She hid a frown. He didn’t have to sound so excited about it. Of course he was probably only being polite. Now she wished she hadn’t said anything. “It’s all right. You don’t have to.”
“Nee, I want to.”
Her gaze flew to him. His tone was a little more eager, but not by much. She’d never felt so awkward in her life. If only she’d ke
pt her mouth shut.
“Where should I park?”
“There’s a spot behind the house, near the barn.” She directed him down the asphalt driveway, which lay between her house and her father’s woodworking shop. Zachariah and Maggie disappeared behind the house.
Ruth took a deep breath and went inside. As she poured two glasses of lemonade, she fought the discomfort spreading through her. She and Zachariah had nothing in common. What would they talk about? Her palms grew slick. Hopefully he would drink the lemonade quickly and be on his way. Never, ever would she be this impulsive again. The embarrassment was unbearable.
“I wish you didn’t have to leave.” Deborah fought back tears as she gave Sadie a huge hug. Her aunt had delayed her departure for most of the day, but now she was ready to head back to Paradise.
“I wish I didn’t have to go either. But I can’t take any more time from work. You have no idea how crabby my boss can be when he’s short employees.” She shook her head. “I work in a little grocery store, for Pete’s sake. The world won’t end if I’m not there.”
“You’re not in trouble, are you?”
“No, I’m fine. He’s like a firecracker. All pop, very little sizzle.”
She stepped back from her aunt. “Danki for everything you’ve done. I couldn’t have gotten through this without you.”
Sadie cupped Deborah’s chin, tears welling in her eyes. “I didn’t do much. Not near enough.” She looked past Deborah’s shoulder to the front porch.
Deborah followed her gaze to see her daed sitting on the front porch. He’d brought the hickory rocking chair outside yesterday evening, and now he had Will on his lap. Moses put his hat on the boy’s small head, but Will kept yanking it off, bringing a ghost of a smile to his grandfather’s face.
“I told you that child would be good for Moses.” She looked back at Deborah. “He’s having such a hard time now. Make sure you look after him. I don’t trust Naomi to do it.”
“I will.” Her eyes filled with water, turning her aunt’s face into a blurry blob.
“Now, don’t you cry. I don’t want my mascara running everywhere. It takes time to put on this face, you know.”
Deborah chuckled and sniffed, wiping her eyes with her fingers. “I don’t know what I’m going to do without you.”
“You’ll be fine. You’re needed here, no matter what your sister says. And that big young man your father hired. What’s his name?”
“Stephen.”
“Yes, that’s right. Never was good with names, you know. He’s going to be a huge help. That will take some of the burden off your father.”
Deborah nodded. Although Stephen had only worked one evening, he’d made a big difference already. He had cleaned out both the chicken coop and goat pen, and still had enough time to replace the warped wood on the bottom porch step.
Sadie patted Deborah’s cheek. “Now, if I don’t get on the road I’ll never leave. I’ll be praying for you, and Will, and Moses. I’ll even pray for Naomi.” She made a face. “That might be the hardest thing I’ve ever done.”
She hugged her aunt one more time. “Have a safe trip back.”
“Will do. Now don’t hesitate to call if you need anything. You know my number.”
“I will.”
Sadie walked around and opened the door to her car. “And write me. I’d ask you to send pictures of Will, but I know you can’t do that.”
“I’ll tell you everything he’s doing, though.”
“You better. But I may just have to make a trip back and see for myself.” She blew Deborah a kiss with her big red lips. “Love you, sugar.”
“Love you too.”
Deborah waved good-bye to her aunt as she pulled out of the driveway. Then she crossed her arms in an effort to keep herself together. Emptiness filled her. The loss of her mother was acute now, and an overwhelming sadness fell over her. Her aunt had confidence that she would be okay, but Deborah wasn’t sure. Dear God, give me strength to do this, to take care of Daed and Will, to forge some kind of truce with Naomi.
When Sadie had disappeared down the road, Deborah walked up the porch steps and smiled at Will and her daed. Her father had just put his hat back on Will’s head, but Will tossed it on the ground and burst into a fit of giggles. She scooped it up and handed it back to her father.
“Gotta get that boy to wear a hat.” Daed plopped it back on Will’s head, and Will threw it down again.
“He thinks it’s a game, Daed.”
“Oh, I know. Why do you think I keep doing it?” He set Will down on the front porch. Will toddled past Deborah and over to the playpen they’d purchased when they went to pick up the crib. Deborah had wanted to pay for the playpen herself, but Sadie wouldn’t hear of it, and Deborah had to admit she was relieved. She had saved a little money from her job, but it wouldn’t last very long. Deborah lifted Will and put him inside, where he started playing with his toys.
“He’ll get used to wearing the hat when he’s older.” Daed stood up from his chair. “Got to check on the cows. I let them out in the pasture this morning. They’re probably ready to come in by now. Might do some clean up in the barn too. Don’t want to leave everything to Stephen. What time did Naomi say supper would be?”
“She didn’t.”
“All right, I’ll go in and ask her.” He moved to go inside, then stopped and looked at her. “How are things between you two?”
Deborah glanced away. “All right.” She refused to elaborate, knowing her father became edgy whenever she and her sister fought. He’d always let their mother referee their arguments. She didn’t want to put any more of an emotional burden on him than he already had. She and her sister were adults. They could settle their differences themselves. That was her prayer anyway.
He nodded, seeming satisfied with her answer. “If I haven’t said it before, I’m glad you’re here. I’m sorry I didn’t give you a proper welcome the other day.”
Deborah’s lip trembled. “You don’t have to keep apologizing for that, Daed. I understand.”
“Still, I shouldn’t have been so harsh. I don’t know what got into me that night.”
“You were grieving.” He still was. They all were, but he seemed to be handling it a little better now. She liked to think her aunt was right and that Will had something to do with it.
Her father looked at her. “I thought you might have gone back to Paradise with Sadie. Seems like you were getting pretty settled back there. I’m glad you decided to stay.”
When she’d first arrived, she had thought the same thing. But seeing her father with Will and the way he acted toward her now made her change her mind. She and her son were needed here.
Thomas suddenly came to mind. She hadn’t had a chance to write and tell him what had happened. As soon as everything settled down, she would tell him that she was staying in Middlefield, at least for the time being. She owed him that much.
“I better hunt your schwester down and find out about supper time. She doesn’t abide lateness, you know.”
After her father went inside to find Naomi, Deborah sat down on his chair and watched Will in the playpen. She closed her eyes, stifling a yawn. She should go inside and see if Naomi needed help getting supper ready, but knowing her sister would refuse, she stayed outside with Will. Later they could go check on the garden or take a walk to the barn and look at the cows. Will had never seen any up close because her aunt lived in a subdivision on the outskirts of Paradise.
The sound of a buggy approaching made her open her eyes. She stood up and saw a black vehicle turn into her driveway, drawn by a beautiful palomino horse. Stephen had arrived.
Stephen brought the buggy around and parked it next to her father’s. He jumped out and tied his horse to the hitching rail then walked toward them. As he neared, she was again struck by his size. He had to be the tallest man in Middlefield. Even in Paradise she’d never seen an Amish man close to his height. But even though he was tall, he wasn’t thin or lanky
. His broad shoulders and solid torso made sure of that. She was most curious about why he held his hand behind his back.
When he was a few feet away, she averted her gaze, not wanting him to catch her staring at him. She picked up Will from the pen. Only when he stopped in front of her did she look up at him.
“Hello,” he said, smiling.
His grin was so genuine she couldn’t help but smile back. “Hello, Stephen.”
“Is your daed around? I’m a little early but I wanted to get going on the barn.”
“He’s inside. You can come in while I geh get him.”
Stephen shook his head. “Nee, I’ll wait out here.”
Deborah saw Will tilt his head back to look at Stephen, his eyes wide. Stephen turned his attention to the boy, reaching out his large hand. “Hello, Will.”
She didn’t expect Will to respond. When Stephen joined them for supper last night, Will had only stared at him. Spending most of his life almost exclusively with his mother and Aunt Sadie had made him wary of others, especially of men. The only man he’d taken to so far was his grandpa. But to her surprise Will tentatively grasped the tip of Stephen’s finger, and the contrast between the sizes of their hands was striking. Then Will released Stephen’s finger and laid his cheek against her shoulder.
“I brought something for Will.” He brought his hand out from behind his back. In his palm was a small wooden horse on wheels. “I made this awhile back for Moriah and Gabe’s kinner. But they keep having maed, so I thought Will might like it.” Stephen looked at her. “If it’s all right with you.”
Deeply touched, Deborah nodded. “Danki, Stephen.” She looked at the toy. “You didn’t have to do that.”
He shrugged, but the glint in his eyes told her he was pleased. He held out the horse to Will. “Gaul.”
Will slowly reached for the horse, then snatched it out of Stephen’s hand. Stephen chuckled.
“He says danki too,” Deborah said as Will clutched the toy to his chest.
At the squeak of the screen door opening, she turned around. Her father walked over to them. He held out his hand to Stephen. After Stephen shook it, her daed looked at Deborah. “Naomi says supper will be done in half an hour.”
The Hearts of Middlefield Collection Page 62