"Kabir," he says. "Brief us on what to expect the first few days after we land. How do we justify her presence and just what can we expect the reaction to be?"
All this without looking at me.
As if he doesn’t want to acknowledge I’m in the room.
"I think it’s a real asset to have her," Kabir smiles at me warmly.
I tilt my head, liking this guy more-and-more. And not just because he's the only one who seems pleased to have me on board. He looks like the kind of person who’ll keep his wits about him in a fight. The kind of person Jai can do with having on his side.
I shove away that thought angrily. Like it matters to me what helps Jai or not.
"I vote we don’t delay but take her directly to the Jungle when we land and have her address them and tell them about Bombay 2."
"Makes sense." I nod.
"She’ll need to be trained," Jai says, his voice thoughtful.
"I’ve known how to protect myself in the last few years," I say flatly.
"Of course." He tilts his head.
Polite. Infuriating.
"Still, it would be a lot more reassuring if you also learned hand-to-hand combat. Out there you won’t always have the luxury of weapons, especially when you come up against shifters. You need to learn hand-to-hand combat."
I’m about to protest when Mikhail speaks up, "He’s right. You are good with the sword but you’ll benefit from learning unarmed fighting skills. Use the next few weeks mastering everything you can. It’s the only thing that’ll keep you alive once we get there."
Jai’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise. A look passes between the two men, one I can’t interpret, but I know that on this one matter they are both in agreement.
Seems they do have a common meeting ground after all.
Me.
Before I can think of what that implies for me, Jai points to the guy on his right. "Niko can train you."
Tall, ponytailed and built like a mountain, Niko has a gentle face, broad with oriental features. I look at his tattooed arms and knuckles and wince, already feeling the broken bones heading my way.
"You may get hurt but I promise you won’t die before you reach Bombay." Jai grins, finally meeting my eyes.
A trail of warmth from him reaches out to me and I blink. Memories come rushing back. Of amber eyes glowing with barely subdued fire as he’d glanced down at me, and leaned in and brushed the hair off my forehead. It’s as if he’s reached out and touched me just then.
I shiver. And as if sensing my thoughts, there’s a fleeting look across his face – one of longing, of pain, of regret? Gone so quickly I’m not sure it was even there.
But Mikhail has seen it too for he stiffens. Goes still. His hand grips the chair tighter, the pressure running from his fingertips through the wood and across to me.
I straighten but don’t lean back.
This time Jai addresses Mikhail directly. "Niko’s the best at unarmed combat. He’ll make sure he doesn’t unnecessarily hurt her either."
"Hey." My voice comes out a little shaky, and I clear it before saying, "I’m still here you know."
Jai replies, his voice smooth, "Of course, sorry, Ariana." He tilts his head. "Niko will let you know when to meet next and you should also have a separate meeting with Kabir to get you up to speed with how the Jungle is being run."
"Being run?" I stare. "You’ve done nothing for the migrants. Nothing except trying to scare them off, uprooting their homes, making sure supplies don’t reach them…" Mikhail’s touch on my shoulder stops me.
"I’m sorry you feel that way," Jai says. His voice is formal. Polite. "I’m aware you and your sister suffered a lot when you were at the camp and I am sorry about—’
"Sorry?" I jump to my feet as an unreasonable rage runs through me. "You are sorry?" It’s not fair that he can sit there with his home still intact and his family safe and apologize for the sorry mess my life has become. "You have no idea what we went through in Bombay—"
"If you don’t want to be here or deliver your end of the bargain, then leave. No one is holding you back." His voice slams into me and I hate it.
Hate that he’s right. That I’m helpless. A pawn between these two factions. Can’t they see it’s all a sham?
And while I may even believe Jai is the real mastermind behind this plan to try and bring peace between the East and the West, I don’t trust Vishal. I’m being manipulated to head back to Bombay, and there’s nothing I can do about it.
"I’m not leaving," I say in a low voice.
He nods, a short sharp jerk. Then, looks around the table and says, "Meeting over. Can you all leave us so I can have a word with Ariana?"
The others shuffle out. He looks pointedly at Mikhail, who hasn’t moved an inch.
Swearing to myself, I turn around and say in a low voice, "It’s fine, Mikhail."
When he hesitates, I snap, "I can take care of myself, OK?"
His jaw firms at that and, turning, he stalks out without another look at me, the door banging behind him.
We stay as we are for a few seconds, the tension building till I can’t stand it anymore. Walking to the porthole I look out, turning my back on him.
The blue and green folds into the distance. Infinite. If only this journey had no ending too.
The silence stretches until he finally says, his voice soft, "How much longer are you going to avoid me, Aria?"
I don’t say anything, don’t even react.
And then he explodes, his voice rising with frustration. "Ari, goddammit, look at me."
Maybe it’s the "Ari" which does it. He's never called me that before. Only my mother called me so. And that shakes me a little. Has he really been thinking of me all these years?
I turn to find him right behind me.
"What do you want?" I ask, looking somewhere over his shoulder.
Waves of longing. Unsaid emotions so thick I can feel them slam into me. I swallow as that ever-present craving unfurls inside.
I can smell that cinnamon and pine scent of his, laced with something darker, deeper. As if his soul has darkened over the years. This time apart has not been easy for him either, but I’m not ready to forgive him. Not yet.
Don’t look at him.
If you do you’ll be lost.
I can feel the tension radiating from him. Tugging at me. Unable to resist, my eyes are drawn to his face. That deep-burnished mahogany of his skin just begging to be touched. I curl my fingers at my side, fixing my eyes at the hollow at the base of his neck. He swallows and the pulse just below his jaw beats rapidly. He’s nervous, I realize with a shock.
Nervous about being in the same room as me. About being so close to me. About my reaction to him. He thinks I’m upset with him. That I’m never going to forgive him.
And I can’t. Not him, nor his family.
"I’m sorry I let you go, Aria. Sorry I wasn’t there to help you—’
I raise my hand as if to put some distance between us. I don’t realize I’m shaking my head, not till I raise my eyes to his and his features twist with emotion.
His eyes flare at me with fear, anger, worry and more.
Hopelessness.
A shattered look on his face.
If I stay here a second longer I’ll touch him and then I’ll regret it.
I brush past him, crossing the floor.
"No. Aria. Don’t." His voice twists with anguish.
He knows he’s lost me.
I shut the door quietly behind me.
Chapter Thirty
Pain shoots through my knee, setting my nerve endings on fire. Groaning, I shake my head to clear it, then, look up from where I’ve been flung to the floor.
Ten days.
I curse inwardly. I’ve spent ten days on this ship. Ten days in which I’ve managed to keep out of Jai’s way and avoided Mikhail as much as possible too.
Another ten left to go before we reach our destination and I know I’m not ready. Not even close to re
ady to face what I feel for either of them. I’d rather face the six-feet-six-inch hulk standing before me, hands hanging loose at his side. I barely come up to his chest.
One side of his lips twists in a slight smile. He’s waiting, waiting for me to rush him.
‘That all you got?" He taunts.
A flicker of anger runs through me and I welcome its bite. My eyes flick to where my sword is propped up at the side.
I’ve been surprised that Jai’s allowed me to keep it.
But again not.
After all, he’s said he trusts me.
I still don’t know what to make of that. I don’t want to think what that means.
Standing there with sweat dripping down my brow and with this hulk of a man waiting to pound me to within an inch of my life, it dawns on me that I do trust Jai too.
Despite everything I trust him.
I swear inwardly, not sure what to make of that.
A part of me is convinced that Jai regrets having let go of me once. And now that we are together, again, he will not fail me. This time he’ll be there for me.
That’s why he came back.
For me.
Doesn’t mean I’m going to make it easy for him, though.
Almost by magic, a fresh burst of adrenaline flows through me. When Niko holds up his palm, beckoning me, I’m ready.
Locking my eyes with his, I keep my gaze away from those biceps, lethal biceps the size of my head. And I let my anger rip. Adrenaline surges, heating my blood, pushing away some of the icicles around my heart.
Springing back up, I bounce on my heels for a bit, pushing away the pain in my knee. Holding up my fists I burst into a run. One, two, three and then pressing back against the floor I jump, flinging myself at him, going straight for his throat. Only to have him step aside.
I crash to the floor, this time hitting my nose with such force that pain rattles through my brain, setting off flashes of yellow and purple lights inside my head.
I lie there stunned, and for a second, a screen of white descends on me. I feel lightheaded, I’m floating. Voices from far off, someone turning me over. Something wet touches my forehead and I struggle to open my eyes.
"Hang on, princess, give it just a few more seconds," a soft voice warns.
As much as Niko throws a mean punch, he’s also one of the gentlest people I know.
Besides, our days of training have shown that he’ll never hurt me. Not intentionally.
Forcing myself to open my eyes, I sit up.
"I’m fine," I grind out, wincing when my voice comes out all gritty.
"Take it easy," he puts his hand on my shoulder and holds me down. I push back and try to move, only to have the world tilt around me.
"Easy," he says again and I draw in a shaky breath, letting him ease me back to the floor.
I shut my eyes and will my muscles to relax. When the bout of sickness has passed, I ask without opening my eyes, "So what’s with Jai’s sword, Niko?"
I’d have preferred to not think about Jai’s sword ever again, but now that I’m going back to where it all started, to where the General had threatened to kill Lily if he didn’t get the sword, and I want to know more. Want to find out what kind of power the sword can give Vishal.
He hesitates and I sense he wants to speak, but something, loyalty perhaps, holds him back.
I almost feel bad doing this. Almost. Opening my eyes, I place my hand on Niko’s and he flushes.
"Tell me, Niko," I say, my voice soft.
‘The tetrad," he finally says, his voice reluctant. "Now that the tetrad is around the corner, the first since…’
He hesitates and I complete the sentence, "The first blood red moon since 2014 when Jai’s mother used the sword and set off the tsunami that destroyed Bombay."
His eyebrows draw down but he stays silent.
"And only Jai can use the sword to harness the power of nature. And that too, only during the upcoming tetrad," I add.
He nods, "The eclipse takes place in three days. We should reach Bombay just in time to see it."
"And is Jai going to call on the power of the sword during this blood red moon?" I ask the question which has been worrying me since I overheard the conversation with Jai and Gilbert at Jai’s bungalow.
Yet, even as I say it aloud, I don’t believe it. In just the short few days I’d spent with him, I’d realized that Jai hated the sword, hated being tied to his promise to his mother.
And yet here he is, taking me back with him, back into danger, for his first loyalty is still to the city.
Without waiting for Niko’s answer I shrug off his hands and jump back to my feet. Only to have my knees buckle under me.
He clutches my waist, propping me up. "Are you sure you’re OK?" He asks, worried. I nod, still too winded to speak.
He looks at me closely, eyes narrowed. Getting to his feet, he pulls me up with him. He doesn’t let go of me, though, and holds me steady with one arm to my shoulder.
"You need to toughen up," he goes on.
"No kidding," I laugh, the sound bitter. You’d have thought the last five years of living rough had made me strong enough. Apparently not.
"You're resilient, I’ll give you that," he says.
I fllush, the various aches and pains in my body forgotten for a second. Weeks of training and I still barely manage to stay on my feet in my hand-to-hand combat bouts with him. So, yeah, I hadn’t quite expected to hear any praise.
Seeing the look on my face, one side of his lips lifts in a half-smile. "You must train your mind," He says. "Train it to stay with the more rational part of yourself. So you don’t let the situation get the better of you. Don’t get into the drama of the moment. Know what I mean?"
"No." I shake my head.
"He means you need to take yourself out of the fight. So you don’t react so quickly and emotionally to situations." Jai’s voice flows over me and I stiffen. "Depersonalize, soldier. That’s the key."
Soldier. He calls me that in the hope of negating any emotional connection between us.
‘That’s what you do best, isn’t it? Depersonalize?" I say, knowing that will hurt.
And sure enough, my words find their mark,
His jaw hardens.
But I don’t feel like I’ve won. Perhaps it’s because his face looks gaunt, the hollows more prominent under his cheekbones. And he’s unshaven, a dark brown stubble covering hair hanging down to his shoulder, knotted. He’s lost weight over the last few days and is pale under his tan. Like a strip of healthy brown has been stripped off him in the last few weeks. He wears the sword in a scabbard slung across his back. The gun in a holster around his waist.
He looks rumpled.
On edge.
Sexy.
I have yet to see him without his weapons since we came aboard the ship.
Another change from seeing him in his house, surrounded by his things. His books. His bed. His sheets.
Another shift in perception I need to make.
That he’s grown up, tougher.
And I realize a part of me finds him even more attractive. The aloofness is a challenge, making me want to tear at the facade to get to the heat lurking just below.
For I was wrong about one thing. His eyes. They haven’t changed. Now they stare at me, even more intense, glowing as if from an internal hunger, something that’s eating him up inside. And that makes him even more attractive.
"Yes," he nods. "It’s what I’m trained to be."
There’s no judgement in his voice, no resentment. He accepts that this is what he is. Except I know better.
Underneath that veneer of studied aloofness is a man who cares deeply about his family, who would give up his life to save a friend, who’d forsake love for duty.
Love?
Yeah, he had loved me then with a schoolboy crush.
Facing me now is a man.
He’d been attracted to me then. He desires me now.
No, he hasn’t changed
that much. Those flames in his eyes are still there, waiting to consume me. Just like the last time. And yet even then he’d held off, held himself back. I’d stood there naked, vulnerable, and he hadn’t taken advantage of me. He’d given me back my dignity.
Turning away, I grip Niko’s upper hand, my nails digging into his iron-like biceps. I sense Jai shift restlessly and put him out of my mind.
For now, though, I’m going to follow his instructions like a good soldier. Depersonalize indeed. He has no idea how good I too can be at that.
Chapter Thirty-One
Seven days later
"I’m ready to go again," I tell Niko.
Seeing the protest in his eyes, I deliberately take a step back so his arm drops away.
A second, a third step back.
I move till there’s enough space between us, then, bending my legs at the knee, I take guard just as Niko’s taught me. Just as Mikhail had coached me. He’d been insistent I learn how to increase the vibration of my body in those early months after I’d joined the rebels.
I had gone along for the training sessions with him more out of a sense of obligation, not paying much attention to what he’d said. I had just followed his instructions, too numb to care. Still, I must have absorbed something from his sessions for now his instructions come flooding back.
These past few weeks with Niko have certainly helped. My body is obeying my mind more and more. And if I focus enough, keep at it enough, I can tune everything else out, tune out the team taking bets on how soon I’m going to go down.
Tune out the sun burning my skin to a crisp.
Tune out Jai…No, that’s a lie. After he told me to depersonalize he hadn’t offered any more advice. But every day when I train with Niko he’s there.
Watching.
Watching from the sidelines.
Eating me up with those eyes.
Calling out to me to come to him.
As if he can’t bear to see me being hit.
As if it turns him on to watch me fight.
He’s making love to me across that space in full sight of everyone. Taunting me.
Torturing himself too. It’s not easy on him, I know that. I know he’s aroused when I leap through the air to avoid being hit. When sweat drips down my breasts, molding my T-shirt to my chest. Jai flicks his eyes over my curves, down the slope of my waist. Further below.
Legends of the Damned: A Collection of Edgy Urban Fantasy and Paranormal Romance Novels Page 137