I nodded, but I didn’t think I would be seeing Madison again anytime soon. I knew that if I did, I would just get myself into trouble.
We rode in silence for most of the way. At times, Madison tried to start light conversation, but my short answers would quickly discourage her. Finally, we reached my street. “You can just drop me off here. I’ll walk the rest of the way.”
“At least let me drop you off in front of your house.”
“No.”
“Why not? Are you afraid of your boyfriend?” To my relief, however, she stopped a few blocks away from my house.
“No…” My voice betrayed me. It was weak and timid.
“Don’t give me that crap.” She turned. “You’re petrified of him. That’s the only reason why you’re still with him. Look…” She grabbed my hand, squeezing it. “You don’t have to live like this. You can just break up with him and live your life any way you want to.”
“It’s not that simple.”
“And why not? Why can’t you just go in there and tell this Kirk guy that you don’t want to be with him anymore, that you found someone better…” She squeezed my hand even tighter. “I saw how he treated you after I gave you CPR. He acted like you were nothing more than a nuisance to him – that you would’ve been better off dead. That’s no way to treat a girl – especially one like you.”
“It doesn’t matter. He’s my boyfriend –”
“What do you mean, it doesn’t matter?” Madison’s voice rose. It was clear to see that she was getting frustrated. “He’s a complete asshole who treats you like yesterday’s garbage.”
“You don’t know that…”
“Of course I do. If he treated you like you were supposed to be treated, then you wouldn’t look so scared all the time.”
“I don’t look scared.”
“Then why don’t you want me to drop you off in front of your house?” I didn’t have an answer for her. “It’s because you don’t want him to see you with me. You think it’ll get you in trouble, but you’re a free woman. You can see anyone you want.”
I shook my head. “You don’t understand.” I fumbled with the door, struggling to get out. She grabbed my wrist before I could do so. “Let go of me.”
“I can’t.” She held on tighter. “Not when I know you’re going back to that dirtbag.”
“Let go of me this instant before I call the cops.” I threatened even though I had no idea what I would tell them if I was forced to make the call. “Kirk is just my boyfriend. He doesn’t abuse me. Our relationship is none of your business.”
She sighed and let go. “Fine. Be stubborn. But if you ever run into trouble, come find me, okay?” Her eyes were full of concern. I didn’t even bother to nod at her, I just closed the door and started to walk toward my house.
She drove away, leaving me all alone in the street. I rubbed my arms, suddenly feeling very cold. I sighed, my chest heaving. I walked slowly, reluctant to face Kirk once I stepped into our home. I tried to forget about Madison, but it was impossible. Our time together in the back of her car had been the best experience of my life. I could still feel myself tingling down there. I could almost feel her tongue grazing against my clit and nearly moaned.
No. I had to forget about her. If I didn’t, Kirk would find out and he would do something. Something bad. I shivered at the thought. Maybe Madison was right, maybe a part of me was afraid of Kirk and what he was capable of…
I reached my house and opened the door. Inside, Kirk was already plopped on the couch, his shoes still on. “Where have you been?” He asked, his voice eerily calm.
“I went for a walk.” I lied, trying to sound convincing.
“You? You never go on walks. Why are you lying to me?” He got up, towering over me.
“I…”
“You’ve been lying to me an awful lot lately, are you hiding something from me? Are you going behind my back and fucking other men?” He grabbed my jaw to force me to look at him. I cringed, trying to pull away from his powerful grasp. “Answer me!”
“No!” I was shaking. “Let go.”
He leaned down and kissed me, his rough lips dominating my own. While kissing him before was tolerable, all I wanted to do now was vomit. I suddenly pushed him away, my skin crawling with disgust. His kiss paled in comparison to Madison’s.
“What the fuck did you do that for, bitch?” He raised his fist and I flinched, thinking he was going to hit me. I was frozen in place, unable to move away. He hesitated for a moment before dropping his hand. “You make me so mad.” He grabbed his keys and headed for the door.
“Where are you going?” I asked, my voice barely audible.
“To get some goddamn air.” He slammed the door behind him. The moment he left, I collapsed to the ground. I couldn’t believe he was actually going to hit me…
Chapter 5
I don’t know how long I just sat there on the living room floor, not knowing what to do with myself. Suddenly, everything Madison had told me in the car felt like it was true. If I just had a bit more courage, I would be able to break up with Kirk and live a better life. Instead, I was trapped in this toxic relationship.
I shook my head. But I couldn’t go back to her now. I would be making a fool of myself. Slowly, I got up and moved into the kitchen. I absentmindedly looked into the fridge. It was overstocked with beer and other worthless things I couldn’t eat. I sighed, remembering all the times Kirk had drunk himself into a stupor, becoming belligerent and intolerable. Why had I put up with him for so long? Was I really that desperate to be with someone? Suddenly, I felt sick to my stomach. I felt ashamed of myself.
I slumped into one of the kitchen chairs, resting my head on my arms. A nasty headache was forming, my temples throbbing. I felt choked up like I was about to cry. Was this going to be my life now? A constant life of misery? What had I done to deserve this?
Finally, I got up and made my way into the bedroom. The bedsheets were disheveled and dirty-looking, but I got under them anyway. All I wanted was something soft to lay on. The mattress, however, was anything but soft. We were supposed to buy a new one, but Kirk didn’t want to spend his own money on it and I hadn’t saved up enough just yet…
I sighed and closed my eyes. Tears started to stream down my cheeks. I just couldn’t keep in my emotions any longer. I knew I should break up with Kirk and take Madison’s advice, but I was too much of a coward.
Eventually, I cried myself to sleep.
In my fitful slumber, dark dreams possessed me. I was on the beach, the waves crashing against the shore, but I couldn’t see anything. All I could feel was the sand under my toes. Someone touched me, pulling me close. “I know you’ve been cheating on me.” They whispered and I felt my heart stop for a moment. It was Kirk. He knew my secret. He knew I had been with Madison.
I gulped, trying to get away from him, but his arms were like vice grips, squeezing me harder and harder until I thought I would suffocate. “Please… you’re hurting me…”
“Good. You deserve it.” I shook my head. No, I didn’t. I deserved to be happy… just like everyone else.
“No! Let go of me.” I began to struggle, determined to take control of my life.
Kirk just laughed, the sound cutting right through my soul.
“If you insist…”
He suddenly pushed me forward. I landed face-first into the water, sinking into its depths. I just kept falling and falling like I was made of lead. My lungs were starting to burn. My heart felt like it would explode at any moment. This was the end…
I reached the bottom and darkness overtook me, only this time, Madison wasn’t there to save me.
I woke up with a start. I was covered in a cold sweat from my nightmare, breathing hard. I ran my fingers through my semi-wet hair when I heard something coming from the living room. It sounded like the front door just got slammed open. I glanced at the clock I kept on the nightstand. It was already two in the morning.
I heard Kirk’s drunk
en laughter and my heart tightened. Had he been out all night drinking? I tip-toed into the living room. To my surprise, I saw him stumbling around with a girl clinging to his arm. She was a pixie of a girl, with a brown bob. She wouldn’t stop giggling. The sound made me sick.
Kirk looked up and saw me standing in the doorway. “You!” His word was slurred. He tried to walk up to me, but he was wobbly, bumping into an end table and knocking over one of our more valuable vases. “What are you still doing here?” He asked, his voice loud and threatening.
“Who’s this, baby?” The girl asked, looking at me with venom in her eyes. “You didn’t say anything about another girl.” She had a pout on her face, making her look like a child.
“That’s because she shouldn’t be here. Get out!” He screamed, trying to grab me. I was thankful for his slow movements because it gave me enough time to get out of harm’s way. He stumbled forward, nearly slamming into the bedroom door. “You bitch!” I quickened my pace, heading for the door.
I left without another thought, the door slamming behind me. Kirk didn’t bother to chase after me. I could already hear the girl giggling inside. I lingered on the landing. Deep down, I knew that I didn’t love Kirk – I never did, but the fact that he was willing to bring a girl home and then kick me out made me feel horrible.
I struggled to get down the stairs, my vision blurring and my nerves shot. The wind had picked up and it was chilly. I shivered, feeling my skin prickle with goosebumps all over. It was the middle of the night and I was all alone on my street. What was I supposed to do?
With no other option, I started walking, unconsciously heading toward the west side of town – toward N. Main Street – toward Madison.
Chapter 6
I don’t know how I managed to remember Madison’s address in my condition, but somehow, I found myself standing in front of her house. It was large, much larger than the one I shared with Kirk.
It felt like my heart had lodged in my throat. I started to have second thoughts. What if she hadn’t forgiven me for lashing out at her earlier? What if she didn’t want to see me? I looked up and down the street, rubbing my arms. It was the middle of night. Who knew if she would even answer the door.
The nearby streetlight started to flicker ominously as if it was trying to give me some kind of a sign to run away. But where was I supposed to run to? I no longer had a home to call my own and I certainly didn’t have any friends to call on. Kirk had destroyed most of my friendships… he had destroyed most of my life.
Taking a deep, steadying breath, I walked forward, determined to do the right thing. I couldn’t ignore my emotions any longer. Deep down, I knew I had feelings for this woman. Our time together had been magical. If I kept telling myself I was straight, I would only be lying.
Finally, I knocked.
Silence followed. I held my breath. Nothing happened for a moment.
I knocked again.
A light on the second floor turned on and I saw the curtains move. I heard someone coming down the steps before the door opened. Madison looked tired. “Chloe?” She rubbed her eyes and blinked at me as if I was some sort of apparition. “What are you doing here?”
“I…” I gulped down my nervousness. “You told me that if I ever ran into trouble I should come and find you…”
She frowned and quickly pulled me inside. She took my hand, guiding me into the kitchen. “Do you want some tea?” She asked. “It’ll help calm your nerves.”
“Not really…”
She was already boiling water in the kettle anyway. “What happened?” She sat down, holding my hands.
“N-Nothing.”
“Chloe, please. I can’t stand it when you lie to me like this. I can tell something is wrong. Why don’t you just tell me… I can’t help you if you don’t.”
I sighed. She was right. “Okay…”
She smiled. “Thank you.”
“When I went back home… Kirk questioned where I was. He thought I was out with some other guy and then kissed me. I felt grossed out so I pulled away and he got angry, raising his fist –”
“Did he hit you?” Madison’s voice was seething with anger.
“No, but almost.”
“I swear if he ever lays a finger on you… I’ll kill him.”
“It’s okay. I’m okay.”
“How can you say that when that dirtbag almost hit you…?” Madison shook her head.
“It doesn’t matter. It’s over now. I’m never going back there again.”
“Oh?” Madison actually looked surprised. “What made you change your mind?”
My breath caught in my throat and my palms started to sweat. I looked up, making eye contact with her. I fell deep into her gaze, getting lost in her beautiful eyes. “You.” I finally said, feeling a sense of relief wash over me.
Her cheeks turned pink at my response. “What do you mean…?”
“This afternoon… when you… well, you know.” I felt shy all of a sudden. I looked away, fiddling with the coaster Madison had set out in front of me.
“It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me.” She whispered.
“No, I want to.” It took me a minute to muster my courage. “You made me feel like no one else before. Everything about you is simply amazing. Even though we were in the back of a car and it happened so suddenly, it was still the best experience of my life…”
“You’re just saying that.” This was the first time I had seen Madison actually blush. I giggled, finding it cute.
“No, I mean it.” I smiled at her. “You’ve completely changed my life.” I reached out and grabbed her hand.
“I’m glad.” She leaned over and kissed the top of my head. “I’m just glad you came to your senses and decided to leave that rotten boyfriend of yours.”
I nodded. “Me too… it was long overdue. Thank you for making me realize that I need to take back control of my life…” Our eyes locked and I felt my heart skipping a beat.
She smiled, rubbing my fingers. “You’re so cold. Why don’t we go take a warm shower? It’ll make you feel better.”
“You mean… together?” I asked, my cheeks burning up. I could only imagine what her perfect body looked like when it was soaking wet. I had dreamed of it before, but I didn’t think my dreams could come close to representing the reality. Even our time spent in the car hadn’t given me the reward of seeing her naked. All I saw was her beautiful face smirking down at me as she played my body, sending me to a blissful high. I bit my lip to keep my fantasies at bay.
“Of course.” She winked at me. “Do you really think I would miss the chance to see you naked?”
I blushed even harder. I had no doubt I was red as a tomato at this point. “Okay…”
“Don’t be nervous. I promise it’ll be a lot of fun.” She locked her fingers with mine and pulled me toward the bathroom.
It was large and luxurious. Both the floor and the walls were covered in soft pink marble. The vanity was large with a lit mirror. In the corner, there was a hot tub that I eyed with intrigue.
“Would you rather take a bath?” She asked, coming up behind me. Her lips trailed along my skin as her hands reached forward, grabbing my breasts, kneading them gently. I was instantly reminded of our time spent in the back seat of her car. She had kneaded my breasts so much that they were sore and tender by the time I got home. Not that I minded all that much… especially when her tongue swirled around my nipples, flicking them back and forth, sending me to new states of ecstasy. I didn’t even know I could feel so much pleasure from foreplay alone.
As she grabbed my chest with a bit more force my body started to react to hers. My heart quickened its pace and my nipples hardened. Between my legs, I could feel my pussy getting wet. Not quite as much as I was in the back seat of her car, but I was quickly getting there. Madison just had a way of getting me so horny. It was like I was a completely different person. I just wanted her to have her way with me. To show me what it really meant to feel pleasur
e.
“I… I don’t have a preference…”
“Then shower it is. The quicker I get you into bed and into my arms, the better.” Her voice was smooth and soft like silk. I felt as if I was being pulled into her spell, becoming her willing plaything. While a tiny part of me was still confused by the fact that I was getting so turned on by another woman, I was starting to realize that I had been lesbian all along and that I had just repressed it throughout the years. Now, it was time for the real Chloe to emerge.
Madison finally let me go and turned on the shower, making sure the water was set to the perfect temperature before turning to me. To her surprise, I had already taken off my shirt, trying to prove to her that I was dedicated, that I wanted this just as much as she did. When she looked at me, I tried to smirk in her direction. I knew I couldn’t be nearly as sexy as she was… but I hoped I was at least doing something for her.
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