I swallowed heavily, embarrassment settling heavy on my shoulders. “Very.” I sounded sheepish. “I still feel like it,” I admitted. Everything I wanted was right in front of me, and I couldn’t help but think it seemed too good to be true. Where was the catch? “This is a lot to process.”
Natalie looked thoughtful, and if you glanced at the tilt of her lips a little sad. I felt awful for putting that expression on her face. “Why don’t you take the time to think about it, and let me know what conclusion you come to? I don’t want to push you into anything.”
It was the cowardly thing to do, and I knew it. I let my insecurities win in that moment. I took the out Natalie had given me.
Chapter Five
The morning of the marathon dawned. I hadn’t seen Natalie since the confusing morning after, and I’d texted her only a handful of times to let her know I was still figuring things out. I couldn’t stop thinking about them. Happiness was right in front of me, but doubts were picking at the edges and rendering me mute.
If I embarked on this relationship, I’d be all in. I was already in love with her, I could admit that now, and I’d known her for all of five seconds in the grand scheme of things. Acknowledging that was overwhelming. I was inherently a practical person. There was nothing practical about any of this. It was the kind of thing that happened in fiction and not real life. And fiction never showed the aftermath. What would happen when Natalie came to her senses? I’d be left heartbroken. That’s what. And what if I was always jealous? What if my reaction to Chloe became a common occurrence? I didn’t want to be the kind of person who let the green monster ride on her shoulder, making her doubt her partner’s every move. Truthfully I trusted Natalie more than that, but once again my own insecurities stepped into play. These other people Natalie would be around were much better options for her.
The thought of Natalie with anyone else made my stomach roil. The image in my head of someone else kissing Natalie’s bare stomach, their fingers playing with her soft folds and drawing those delicate, mewling whines from her parted lips made me sick. Those were reactions for me. I wanted to be the only one to elicit them. The only one to know exactly what she felt like, sounded like.
Ever since that night, I’d been able to think of little else. I dreamed of it. I dreamed of moving over her, our lips connected and our breaths shared. I dreamed of her hands on my body, drawing an equal response from me. And when I was awake I was no better. Even though the bruises had faded, I remembered where each had been and found myself pressing against the spots at the most random of times.
I huffed at the ceiling, prone with indecision in my bed. I was being ridiculous. I didn’t have the right to decide for Natalie what she really wanted. And if I was being honest, she could have been my equal in money and there’d still be a chance it wouldn’t work. Every single thing we did in life ran that risk. Was I going to be brave and put everything on the line for her? Or was I going to tuck my tail and slink off like a coward?
I’d continued, in my spare time, to condition for the marathon. Which said a lot right there. I wasn’t a quitter. I didn’t run when things got hard or dicey. I stuck it through with the hope the outcome would be worth it. I needed to get off my ass and go get the girl.
I was behind on time, so I rushed through getting dressed and my morning routine, only slowing down to eat what Natalie would have termed a proper breakfast. I texted her on my way out the door to meet me at the marathon, and I told her I had something to tell her when it was all said and done, if I didn’t pass out midway through the insanely long affair.
Roads had been closed for the event, and there were so many people milling around that it was overwhelming. I looked and I looked, but I couldn’t see Natalie. My stomach rolled with stress. She had to be here. She wouldn’t not show up.
Numbers were handed out, and I was moved to stand in a clump of spandex clad people. It was probably foe the best I couldn’t see anything outside of my immediate vicinity. I was doing this for Natalie, and I didn’t want to trip and fall on my face because I’d been too busy staring at the crowds. I’d find her after, and everything was going to be okay. No. It was going to be perfect.
The marathon started, and I paced myself. It wasn’t a race, though a few people did charge ahead of the pack, but most of them stayed loosely in the formation they’d started in. There was a feeling of unity in it. We’d all cross the finish line together, not as individuals but as a whole.
It was the most exhausting thing I’d ever done. There were times where I thought I couldn’t go on, where my chest felt fit to burst with the effort to draw in air, but I thought of Natalie and her steely belief in me. I was doing this for myself, but I was also doing this for her.
Crossing the finish line felt like release. I’d done it. I doubled over, hands on my knees, and I panted. My legs were rubber, sore and shaking, and I suddenly didn’t know if I could take another step without keeling over.
The bottom half of a pair of crutches appeared in my vision, and my breath caught for a whole other reason. Through sheer force of will, I straightened to find Natalie standing across from me. Her hair was shiny in the sunlight, and her lips were glossy. Her cheeks were rosy, and she was smiling. So big and so wide. The one that went always to her eyes.
I’d had a speech prepared for this moment. I’d worked on it the journey here. It was long and heartfelt. I opened my mouth, and what came out was, “I love you.” The words were filled with naked honesty and so much emotion, punching from me without any say so on my brain’s part.
Natalie engulfed me in a tight hug, dropping her crutches as she did so and putting all of her weight onto me. Her breasts pressed against me, and I was hit with a wave of longing so strong that I wasn’t sure whether it was that or her weight which rocked me back. I nearly fell, but I managed to stay upright and I wrapped my arms around her, squeezing tight as I buried my face against her shoulder. I luxuriated in the closeness of her, the familiar scent that I was beginning to associate with only her. “I love you,” I said again, on purpose this time.
Natalie kissed my neck, sweaty though it was, and when she said, “I love you,” the words were felt on my skin as much as heard. Her tongue flicked out over my skin, and I shuddered, biting back the urge to beg for more. We weren’t in the right place for that. She pulled away minutes later, and I stopped to gather her crutches. When I looked at her face, I found her eyes sparkling with wetness, her lashes dewy. She grinned at me. “Let’s get out of here, yeah?”
I backed Natalie into the bed and then put a hand to her shoulder to stop her from laying down. Gently, I eased her shirt up and over her head. I tossed it aside, then bent to trail kisses over the top of her breasts. Her bra cupped them beautifully, positioning them perfectly for my attention. I could feel Natalie shiver and her exhale was breathy. Before moving on, I took a moment to nuzzle, rubbing my cheek over the silky soft flesh. I buried myself between the two, feeling them press against my face. I finally understood why so many people were enamored by so simple an action. I kissed every bit of revealed skin. Heat pooled low in my belly, and I had to remind myself to be patient. I shifted restlessly, but I didn’t quicken my pace.
Unlike the first time, I removed Natalie’s bra in one attempt. Her breasts were bared to me, and I didn’t hesitate to take one of her hard nipples into my mouth. I gently used my teeth on the sensitive nub, and I was rewarded with a low moan and the arch of Natalie’s back. I kept a hand on her spine, tracing the curve as she pushed toward me.
I don’t know how long I spent encouraging her nipple to peak hardness, but her knees were tight to my sides and she was breathing deeply, each one shaky. I kissed my way from one breast to the other, my tongue tasting her skin.
Once both breasts had received an equal amount of attention, I drew away with a low wet pop and then urged Natalie to lay on her back. Her legs hung over the end of the bed, and I carefully removed her jeans while she wiggled to help. This left her bare on th
e bed, in nothing but her thin scrap of panties.
I took in the view, awed. She was so lean, so perfect. Like this I could see all of her, and she was smiling wickedly down at me, eyes hooded. She ran a hand down her stomach as I watched, plucking at her wet nipples and tracing the dips and curves of her abdomen, before she stopped to tease at the lace edge of her panties. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes heavy lidded. “You going to do anything or just keep looking?” she asked, fingers sliding beneath the lace edges. I watched her move them steadily, the way she arched on the bed, a moan leaving her as she pulled her legs up and spread them.
My voice caught in my throat. I put my hand over hers, feeling her touch herself, before I nudged her hand out and away. I started at the curve of her buttcheeks, grazing wet kisses and sharp bites over the plump flesh, working me way up to the back of her thighs that she’d so helpfully bared to me. I nipped and licked the spots which I found to be especially sensitive for her—the inside of her thighs was a particular favorite.
I didn’t stop until she was a squirming mess. Her back wasn’t on the bed, arched clean from it, and her belly quivered with every breath. The damp spot on her panties was obvious, large and soaking, and the scent hit me like a wave. I felt a surge of pride. I may have been new at this, but I was quickly getting the hang of it.
I urged her farther onto the bed, and while she watched I finally undressed. I took my time, trying to make the experience a tease. I wanted it to be special. I drew my shirt over my head slowly, and then I undid my bra with one casual flick to the clasp. My breasts were bared to her and I took a moment to cup them, thumbing the nipples. I turned my back to remove my pants, bending over as I did so and adding a slight wiggle to my backside. I was thrown off balance by her palm landing on my bare skin, but I stayed still, letting her cup and feel. I gasped when she spanked me, and I whined when she retreated, leaving my skin cool where she had once been.
When I was naked, I crawled over her and gently lowered my body to hers. The feeling of Natalie pressed against me everywhere was amazing. Her skin was warm, and I could feel every shiver. Her nipples were hard, and the points pressed against my chest. The fabric of her panties was silky against my mound. A little bit of wiggling and I had my leg between hers, the damp cloth of her panties riding my thigh. I moaned at the contact, feeling my own panties grow wet in a rush from so simple a thing.
Our lips met, and I sank into the contact. She tasted of mint toothpaste and warmth, her tongue slick against mine as we tangled. This was harder than our other kisses, more urgent and almost a battle for dominance. We didn’t break the kiss until it became a necessity for breathing. I took that as my cue—if I could, I’d kiss Natalie all day and do nothing else—and slunk back down her body.
I puffed air over Natalie’s panties, a quick glance taking in how her toes curled at the action. I breathed heavy over them, mouthing at her through the soaked fabric, poking my tongue against it. I waited till she was moving her hips insistently, and then I at last removed her panties, tossing them aside and putting my mouth on the prize. Natalie whined immediately, and her hands landed in my hair, tangling in the strands.
I gave her my all. With single minded determination and focus, I set about on my mission to make Natalie come. I pulled from experience. I tried to do everything I’d ever had done to me that I’d loved, and I tried to do everything I’d done the first time that she’d loved. I sank two fingers into her right away, licking around them, moaning at her taste. I was hesitant at first, but she was tight and so hot around me, squeezing impossibly hard. A curl of my finger and a press in the right spot had her hips bucking fiercely.
It was empowering.
I ate her out as if my life depended on it. I sucked hard on her clit, my tongue steadily flicking, remembering what that had done to her the last time. I was rewarded with her nails on my shoulders, her cries filling the room. I added another finger, twisting them and picking up the pace as her hips began to move insistently, forcefully bucking into the pressure. If she wanted fast and hard, I could give her fast and hard.
I didn’t stop until she was done coming. It was loud and her hands were nearly claws in my hair, holding me to her. I worked her through it, my free hand on the flat of her stomach so I could feel every single movement from the outside as well as the inside. She clenched so tightly around my fingers, I feared they’d snap. I didn’t move away from her clit till she was done, the aftershocks making the tiny thing twitch. She trembled beneath me, with high breathy sounds and moans that were almost shouts. I’d never felt so accomplished before.
When I pulled away, lips slick with her juices and my breath coming in aroused pants, she moved quickly to yank me up the bed and flip me over. She didn’t hesitate to kiss my mouth, which no doubt tasted heavily of her. She explored every crevice, sharing her taste with me, and the knowledge she was so enthusiastically tasting herself only served to make me hotter.
Then she set about returning the favor. She was evil, though. She licked and sucked and fingered till I was a second from plunging over the edge, and then she stopped. I begged and pleaded, but she did nothing more than kiss my belly, my thighs, my calves. She waited till my tremors had subsided, and then she put her mouth back on me. Her fingers back in me. She had three in me, and she twisted and plunged them ruthlessly, massaging my walls all while doing magical things to my clit. When I was once again a breath away from coming, my walls already starting to flutter with the beginning of orgasm, she pulled away. She left me empty and clenching around nothing, left me keening into air as my orgasm slipped away.
Again and again she did this, working me to the edge and then refusing to let me fall. I don’t know how long she kept me in this state, but I was begging and damn near crying when she finally, oh God finally, let me tip. I could feel it approaching like a roaring wave, and my hands formed claws against her skin, harsh sobs ripping from my throat. She couldn’t pull away again. She couldn’t.
And she didn’t.
The pressure around my clit grew as she sucked harder, and she kept her fingers firmly in place, insistently rubbing. It was the best orgasm of my entire life, and it left me rung dry. I was limp, my entire body gone to Jell-O.
She collapsed beside me, her face against my neck and an arm slung over my waist. Our skin was tacky with sweat, but neither of us had the energy to go clean off. She nuzzled against me, and her sigh was one of pure pleasure. I turned my body towards hers, and we fell asleep like that.
Entwined.
Secret Teachings
~ Bonus Story ~
A First Time Lesbian Romance
There wasn’t a day that Karli didn’t appreciate her life. It was simple, perhaps – a high school art teacher in a small town that boasted barely over ten thousand people – but it was pleasant and she had few complaints. She would start her morning, before the sun had finally made its journey over the horizon, make her breakfast and her needed coffee. A morning walk followed, before it was back home, showered, and off to work.
She had a routine. Almost everyone who knew her, knew it. There wasn’t a thing about her many people questioned, or wondered about. Her life was, like many in small towns where everyone knew everyone, laid out and open for the world to see.
At least… most of it.
* * *
There wasn’t a day that Karli didn’t appreciate her life. It was simple, perhaps – a high school art teacher in a small town that boasted barely over ten thousand people – but it was pleasant and she had few complaints. She would start her morning, before the sun had finally made its journey over the horizon, make her breakfast and her needed coffee. A morning walk followed, before it was back home, showered, and off to work.
She had a routine. Almost everyone who knew her, knew it. There wasn’t a thing about her many people questioned, or wondered about. Her life was, like many in small towns where everyone knew everyone, laid out and open for the world to see.
At least… most of it
.
Karli didn’t have a hard time hiding it, the fact that she preferred women to men. She went on dates here and there, was a flirt when she needed to be. Most people assumed she was like any other teacher – too passionate and busy molding the minds and talents of the young to focus too much on a man. The old folks would sometimes joke that she ought to settle down, raise a family. Her friends weren’t too interested in pushing her to do so, if only to tease her each time one of them got married, or announced a pregnancy, that Karli would be ‘forever the bridesmaid, never the bride,’ or that she would be able to spend all that time not being a mother herself to play aunt to their children.
She pretended that it didn’t bother her, since her loneliness was self-imposed; she couldn’t imagine herself settling down with a man to placate the town around her. There were very few gay women she had encountered, and those relationships had always been secretive, and sadly short. Her town wasn’t the most open, like many small towns, and she often found herself wondering how long it would be before her loneliness pushed her out of her beloved hometown, or out of her comfort zone of remaining under the radar.
All things considered, she adhered to keeping herself out of trouble with the fear of being discovered. Though she had dated, she hadn’t found the person that would break her of her intentional isolation, and she didn’t know if or when it would happen. That’s possibly what led her to not suspecting that when she was entirely unaware, when she was wholly not waiting for it – someone would come around that would shake her and make her question whether she wanted to continue her life as it was.
It was early in the school year, barely two weeks in. The freshman American History teacher, Mr. Philips, had suddenly announced his resignation, and made a swift, sudden exit from Pemberley High School. There were rumors all around as to why he left. Some thought that perhaps his drinking problem had become too much to deal with while working a full load with students to boot – others felt he was perhaps too old and senile and had just finally snapped in his tender old age. Whatever the case, they needed a permanent teacher. Substitutes were few and far between and only so many from the next city over were ever willing to come and play the part of teacher for their small town (a fact that caused a small bit of resentment among the townsfolk.)
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