Only a dream, only a dream, I repeated in my head. Oh, I knew it was only a dream, but it was so awful! The things Tina said to me clanged around horribly in my head, haunting me in a way that nothing else could, not even the sight of her corpse.
I promised myself that I wouldn’t cry over a nightmare, then promptly burst into tears anyway.
I glanced at the clock beside my bed. It was only eleven P.M; I’d only been asleep for an hour, then.
I needed someone to talk to. The thought of going back to sleep chilled me to the bone. I couldn’t face Tina again.
My parents were gone for the night, but I wasn’t sure I could talk to them anyway. They wouldn’t understand.
But I knew someone who would.
I tried with little success to dry the tears from my face, then grabbed my phone and dialed Gabi’s number.
She answered on the second ring. “Hello?”
“Gabi,” I said, trying to keep my voice steady. “I…I need you.”
“What’s wrong?” Her voice was sharp and alarmed.
I squeezed my eyes shut. More helpless tears tracked down my cheeks. “I had a bad dream. About Tina.” I wanted to tell her how awful it’d been, but I wasn’t sure I had the words to describe it.
“I’m on my way,” she said immediately, and hung up.
I tossed my phone on the nightstand and drew my knees against my chest. To my surprise, I felt a little bit better already, knowing that Gabi was coming. I also felt a little pleased knowing that she was willing to drop everything and come over just because I had a nightmare.
My sexy dream was almost forgotten, overshadowed by the horrible nightmare. Sex was the furthest thing from my mind right now, but I still wanted to be presentable for Gabi. So I quickly brushed my teeth and hair, then slid back into bed to wait for Gabi to come.
I didn’t have to wait long. Less than ten minutes later, Gabi swung my bedroom door open. Her hair was loose and flowing, and she was dressed in a tiny tank top and denim shorts that exposed every inch of her long, smooth legs. Her eyes were wide with concern.
“Connie,” she said softly. She slid into bed next to me, and when she drew me against her body, I went willingly enough, resting my head on her chest. I could hear her steady heartbeat, and it calmed me. “Are you all right?”
I closed my eyes, feeling the coldness and the terror slowly fade out of my body. “I am now,” I said, cuddling against her more closely. She smelled like flowers.
She stroked my hair. “Do you want to tell me about it?”
I stiffened against her. “No.” All I wanted was this: Gabi’s concern, her presence, her skin on mine…
“It’ll be better if you do,” she insisted. Her beautiful face was inches from mine. “I have them too, you know. It’s better to get it all out.”
I trembled. “She was dead,” I said quietly. “I mean, really dead. A rotting corpse. And she was saying terrible things; things I’ve been thinking anyway, but to hear them coming from her?” I shivered again. “It was awful. I never want to go to sleep again.”
She resumed stroking my hair, her hand occasionally brushing my cheek and the nape of my neck softly.
“Thank you for coming,” I murmured against her.
She pulled me tighter against her in response.
Suddenly I couldn’t stand it. Her closeness had awakened a deep, hungry need in me, and in a bout of boldness, I pressed my lips against her warm soft ones.
Her eyes flew open in surprise, and my heart sank. Oh, no. I blew it! She was going to leave, I was sure of it, there was no way that Gabi would ever want me.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered.
In response, she entwined her hand in my hair and pulled my face against hers.
I let out a little gasp as she kissed me deeply, hungrily. Her moist tongue caressed my lower lip, and I shivered and parted my lips. She took the hint, and her tongue darted in between them. Oh, God, she tasted so sweet.
For the moment, I forgot my grief, my guilt, my terror. I gave myself willingly and completely to Gabi and her oh so capable hands.
She nibbled softly on my lower lips, sending jolts of liquid heat through my body. I arched my back, pressing myself against her soft curves.
Slowly, teasingly, we explored each other’s mouths, kissing and licking and nibbling, and I trembled in her arms. Our breaths grew ragged, a symphony of our desire.
Her lips drifted down, and she slowly kissed my neck and my throat, flicking her hot tongue across it. I shivered as her warm lips trailed slowly and sensually across my collarbone before meeting mine again. I drank in her kisses like fine wine, and her hot, sweet tongue danced tantalizingly in my mouth.
Her hand drifted down to the front of my tank top, and my breath caught in my throat as she cupped my left breast. I wasn’t wearing a bra, and my lust quickly became apparent to her. She gave me a wicked half-smile as her fingers swirled and flicked and teased the hard little peak through my shirt.
“Please,” I gasped against her lips. She kissed me again in response, still with that smile on her beautiful face. Her eyes glittered with desire.
“Please what?” she purred.
In answer, I slid my hands up her shirt, slipping them across her flat belly and relishing the way she shuddered as my fingertips brushed the bottom of her bra. “Two can play at that game,” I teased.
Gabi’s eyes gleamed mischievously, and before I knew it she rolled me over on my back, straddling my hips and pinning my arms behind my head. I wriggled indignantly. “Let me go!” I gasped and laughed at the same time.
“Make me,” she said simply, and leaned forward.
The aching tension between us built in a swirling storm as Gabi’s lips met mine. This kiss was different; not slow and teasing and exploring, but full of urgent desire, her tongue flicking against mine. Her hair fell around my face in a waterfall.
She finally let go of my arms, but before I could do anything, she reached forward and pulled off my tank top, tossing it indifferently on the floor. The cold air hit my bare skin, but before I could feel the cold, Gabi’s mouth drifted down.
I involuntarily sank my nails into her shoulder as a wave of pleasure crashed through me. Gabi’s lips nibbled teasingly, and my entire body tingled when she sucked lightly on the hard, swollen nub before switching to the other side. The light, feathery strokes of her tongue sent waves of pleasure crashing through me. Oh my God, it felt so good! I gasped and moaned as her hot, wet tongue swirled around it.
I tried to pull her shirt off, but she stopped my hands. “Oh no, babe,” she said sweetly. “Not right now. It’s all about you. I don’t want you distracting me. All in good time.”
Tremors went through me as her hand slipped in between the waistband of my satin shorts. Her fingers flicked at my panties, and I bit my lip to keep in the cry of pleasure.
“Oh no, Connie,” she breathed. Her cheeks were flushed, and she grinned at me. “Don’t hold back. I want to hear you.”
When she slid my silk panties to the side, I couldn’t help it; I begged unapologetically. “Please,” I moaned. “Please, oh please.” I’d never wanted anything more in that moment than for Gabi to touch me, stroke me, make me come…
She grinned devilishly again. “If you insist,” she breathed, and her fingers dipped in the junction between my wet, quivering thighs.
I bucked my hips and groaned as her fingers swirled around, sending electric shocks through me, my blood boiling with desire and my heart pounding in my chest. She knew exactly what I wanted; her skilled fingers caressed the hard bump near the top of my wet lips, and I could feel my hot, slick juices soaking my panties.
My pleasure peaked, and I could feel the approaching climax. I welcomed it, wanting nothing more than to come, but before I could, Gabi snatched her fingers away.
“What the hell!” I growled, disappointed. I trembled on the bed, and Gabi grinned at me devilishly.
“Who says you get to have all the fun?” sh
e asked. “It’s my turn now. Then you can come.”
My disappointment vanished on the spot, and I gripped her wrists and rolled her over on the bed, straddling her. She wriggled her hips, and my heart leapt as I felt her own hot juices soaking through her shorts.
I didn’t have the patience to be slow and teasing; I practically ripped her shirt from her body and slipped my hand up her pink, lacy bra. Her breath caught in her throat as I pinched her hard little nipple lightly, tugging on it and teasing it. I tugged at her bra with my teeth, inching it up, until her perfect breasts sprang free. I uttered a little gasp; they were even more lovely than I’d dreamt.
My tongue dipped and swirled around her hard pink peak, and her soft squeal of delight inflamed my mind and fanned the flames of my desire.
I pulled away, and she groaned with disappointment.
I grinned. “See how it feels?”
“Yeah, it sucks,” she growled. She sat up and took me in her lap. I wrapped my legs around her waist, and her arms encircled my body as we kissed, our tongues entangling.
Gabi slowly and teasingly gyrated her hips, grinding herself against me, and I could feel how hot and wet she was through her shorts. I moaned a little; she was driving me crazy!
She pulled me backwards, tumbling me against the soft pillows, and before I knew it she was slipping my shorts off. I lay completely naked except for my pink silk panties. Her eyes crawled eagerly over them.
“Not yet,” I somehow managed to say, stopping her hands as she reached for them. “Now you.”
She flashed me the same devilish grin from before, and my blood boiled with renewed fiery lust. “Greedy,” she purred, but she slipped off her bra completely, then her shorts. My breath caught; she was wearing a tiny red thong, and it completely displayed the curves of her firm, round butt.
“Satisfied?” she said with a crooked smile as she did a slow, sensuous dance on her knees for me, tossing her hips back and forth. I was mesmerized by her tight, tanned body.
“Not yet,” I panted, and I reached up, gripping her panties and painstakingly slipping them down around her thighs. My breathing was loud and ragged in my ears. She was completely naked now, and fuck, she was even more perfect than in my dream.
Gabi moved down on the bed, and I was too distracted by the sight of her to realize right away what she was doing; but when I did, I whimpered with anticipation.
Gabi positioned herself between my legs, and my entire body quivered with anticipation. Never in my entire life had I been this aroused; I ached with the overpowering need to be taken and made to come.
Her tongue flicked out, teasing the top of my panties, and I leaned my head back against the pillows. “Oh, God,” I moaned as her teeth lightly grazed me through the fabric.
She gripped the panties in her mouth and eased them down. Now I was completely exposed, and Gabi gazed at me for a single heart-stopping moment. Her eyes glinted with her own hunger.
Her plump lips trailed along the inside of my quivering thigh, smearing the juices that had collected there.
“Hurry up!” I gasped. Why was she taking so long? I want to come, dammit!
“Don’t rush me,” she teased, tracing my outer folds slowly with her fingertip, collecting the slick wetness. “I’ll make you come when I’m damn good and ready.”
My protest died on my lips as Gabi’s mouth settled between my legs. Pure molten pleasure jolted through me as Gabi’s tongue swirled around the hard, swollen bump near the top of my lips. I let out a squeal as she traced circles around it, and when she very lightly sucked on it, I slammed my teeth together to keep in the scream threatening to burst out of me.
God, she knew exactly what she was doing! Her tongue flicked across the most sensitive part of my clit, driving the pleasure through me mercilessly. I was completely helpless in the face of it.
Still licking eagerly, her fingers parted my folds, and one of her fingers teased my wet, slick entrance, swirling around it while I trembled and begged. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, she slipped it inside.
“Ohh, fuck, Gabi!” I moaned, tossing my hips as she slid her fingers back and forth, in and out, filling me again and again. She slipped another finger in, than another, until I was completely filled. Her fingers pressed against the sensitive spot inside as she pumped them faster and faster.
My pleasure peaked, and oh dear God, I was about to come, and nothing in the world could ever stop it.
I arched my back as tremors shook my body, and my climax burst through me, as hot and powerful as an erupting volcano. Never in my life had I orgasmed this hard; I shook with the power of it, and bright colors danced across my vision. I couldn’t have stayed silent if my life depended on it; I let out a deep, throaty moan as wave after wave of pure electric pleasure coursed through me, obliterating everything in my mind but my desire.
Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, it subsided, and Gabi pulled me against her as we sank down against the pillows. I felt warm and loose, completely relaxed as I bathed in the afterglow of my orgasm. She stroked my hair, and I snuggled against her, for the moment completely and utterly content with the world.
I drifted off to sleep with Gabi’s hands entwined in mine, and there were no more bad dreams.
Chapter Five
In the week that followed that electric night, I finally began to heal—completely heal. Thanks to Gabi, I’d done what I thought was impossible; put aside my grief and exist in spite of it. I learned a valuable lesson—that pain was only crippling when you let it be, and that it did not have to define me.
I felt more and more like my old self by the day.
I finally begin to accept the fact that Tina’s death was not completely my fault. That I had failed her as a friend was true; I’d have to live with that fact for the rest of my life. But I couldn’t hold myself responsible for all the terrible things that happened in the world. All I could do was learn from my pain and swear to become the best possible person that I could, in honor of Tina.
But I feared for Gabi.
Not long after our night together, she called me to tell me that her parents had thrown away all of her liquor, and forbade her to buy more. I was secretly pleased; I didn’t like how much she drank, and suspected that she was using alcohol as a crutch. I thought that, without it, she could heal, too.
But she began to withdraw from me. Her phone calls became less frequent, and she stopped coming by to see me.
It frightened me.
One night I could stand it no longer, and I called her three times in a row. She didn’t answer either time.
A voice in my head nagged me, told me that something was wrong, terribly wrong. Fear bubbled up in my chest, and without hesitation I jumped in my car and tore down the road.
I tried to convince myself that maybe Gabi was just tired, or purposely ignoring me. As rain hit my windshield in little patters, I tried calling her again. No answer.
My fear escalated into full-blown panic. What would I do if anything happened to Gabi?
I whipped into her driveway. Her parents’ car was gone, but Gabi’s truck was there. She was home, then.
I pounded on the front door. “Gabi?” I called, trying to keep my voice from shaking. There was no reply, and I pounded harder. “Gabi! It’s me, open up!”
Nothing but silence.
I tried the doorknob, and to my surprise found it unlocked. I slipped inside, my heart pounding sickly in my chest.
“Gabi?”
The house was dark and silent, but a sliver of light was cast into the hallway. It was coming from the bathroom; the door was slightly ajar. I crept towards it, and it was like being in a nightmare; time seemed to slow down.
As I approached the door, the sharp smell of alcohol hit my nose like a punch, and I could hear someone sniffling.
“Gabi?” I whispered.
“Go away,” a weak, slurred voice answered.
I swallowed back my trepidation and swung the door open.
“Oh my God. Gabi!” In my panic, I shouted, and I rushed to her side.
She was sitting on the edge of the tub, wearing shorts that exposed her bare thighs. In one hand, she held a straight razor, dripping blood from the fresh cut on her leg. In the other hand she gripped a mostly-empty bottle of tequila.
Without thinking, I struck the razor from her hand. It clattered against the floor tiles, spraying tiny droplets of blood across them.
Her face crumpled, and she burst into loud, braying sobs. It broke my heart to see her in pain and to see her cry. I’d thought Gabi was so strong, but only now was I beginning to see the true depth of her pain.
I took her in my arms, shaking with my own tears, as she clutched me. She dropped the tequila bottle on the floor beside her. I took the opportunity to check the cut, which oozed dark drops of blood. I let out a shuddery sigh of relief; it didn’t seem too deep.
“I’m sorry,” she sobbed against my shoulder.
“Why did you do it?” I said, tears coursing down my cheeks. “Why would you hurt yourself?”
“I just couldn’t take it anymore,” she gulped. She gestured at her bloody thighs. “This helps. I can’t explain why, but it does.”
It hurt me to see her in so much pain. In fact, it almost crippled me. I rocked her back and forth, and she clung to me like a drowning person clutching a life preserver. “You don’t understand,” she said. “You don’t know what it’s like, looking into a mirror and seeing your dead sister looking back at you.”
My eyes widened. I’d never really considered that. Fresh guilt hit me then. All this time, I’d only been thinking of myself. What sort of hell had it been like for Gabi?
“As long as I had the alcohol, I was okay,” she said in a rush. “I could keep it buried down inside of me. But it got harder and harder every day…” She gestured at the bottle on the ground. “I stole it from my parent’s cabinet. I broke the lock. They’re going to be so mad at me. But I started thinking about Tina again, and I couldn’t stop. I just couldn’t deal with it tonight.”
“I had no idea,” I whispered. “You should have called me!” I pulled away from her and gazed into her wet eyes. “Do you have any idea how terrified I am at the thought of losing you? You’re the only reason why I can bear to wake up in the morning anymore!”
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