Jonah Cartwright was the personification of devastating pleasure—but there was so much more to him beneath that breathtaking surface. Depth and heart and a beautiful soul that she longed to soothe. That she wanted to drench in the light and warmth of happiness, helping him to cast out the shadows of his past. Had any of his lovers ever truly wanted Jonah for more than what he could do for them? Give them? For more than the way he could make them feel?
She did. She wanted to give him everything—all that she was—for as long as he’d let her.
For forever, if she was that lucky. And, God, she hoped that she was.
“You’re staying?” he asked, his deep voice cracking with emotion.
“Yes. Of course I am.” She reached up to cup his bearded cheek again. “I love you too much to do anything but stay.”
His eyes went wide at her words, and she felt the powerful tremor that shook his tall, muscular frame. “Holy fuck, Jace. You mean it?”
“Yes,” she said again, trying to find the right words to explain. “From the first moment this thing between us started, I’ve been worried that it was too good to be true. But now I get it. I get what our relationship means to you, and I’m not afraid anymore. I’m not afraid to trust in what we have, and to finally say the words that have been bottled up inside me. I’m not afraid to tell you that I love you, Jonah. I love you so much.”
“Christ, I love you too, angel. More than you’ll ever know,” he groaned, shaking even harder as he lifted her up and covered her mouth with his, his left hand tangling in the curls at the back of her head. He kissed her like he meant to consume her, his tongue stroking across hers like a promise and a prayer, and she wound her arms around him, holding him tight as he carried her over to one of the comfortable poolside chairs and carefully set her down. Then he dropped down on his knees in front of her, his big hands settling on her waist as she gripped his shoulders.
“Jace,” he scraped out. “I’m so fucking sorry, baby. For everything. Valerie. The video. For not telling you everything when I had the chance, before she shoved it in your face, and I promise you that she will never be able to hurt us again. But I… Fuck, I don’t even know what to say about what she sent you.”
“This isn’t going to be easy to explain, because what she did was terrible and wrong, but in a weird way, I’m actually glad I saw it.”
“What?” Confusion darkened his gaze. “For God’s sake, why?”
She wet her trembling lips, and fought to steady her voice as she said, “Seeing that video… I won’t lie and say it didn’t hurt, because it did. It was one of the most painful things I’ve ever been through.”
He closed his eyes and shuddered. “Fuck, Jace.”
“But it also helped.”
He lifted his lashes and looked at her like she was crazy. “How the fuck could it help?”
With a shrug, she tried to explain. “First of all, I’m guessing that that was what you were still keeping from me. The fact that you performed with both women and men? And all at the same time?”
His corded throat worked as he gave another hard swallow. “Yeah.”
“And I know you know me well enough to understand that the sex of your past partners doesn’t matter to me at all. But I’m guessing that given my reaction to the photo of you with Monica and Jenny, and to learning about the night you spent sharing Denny with Gabe, combined with my fear that I won’t be enough for you… I’m guessing you thought that if I knew about nights like the one in that video, then that fear might finally get too big to fight and make me end things.”
He nodded, and she didn’t miss the way his hold on her waist tightened, as if he were still afraid she would pull away from him.
“But in a strange, and completely surprising way, it’s helped me, Jonah. And I kinda love that that’s the complete opposite of what Valerie wanted to accomplish. But it’s the truth, because now I know. Being able to watch what you were like in the Diamond with my own two eyes has enabled me to see the difference. I mean, yeah, I’m not so naive as to think that you never enjoyed yourself there. I know there were times when you did. But the man who was on that stage in front of that crowd isn’t the same one who’s here with me now. You no longer have those demons on your back—the ones you’ve carried for so long—driving you to be guarded and alone, even when you were in a crowd of people.” A wry smile twitched at the corner of her lips. “Or taking part in some raunchy group sex on a glass-encased stage.”
His fingers speared into her curls as he gently took her head between his shaking hands. “Of course I’m not the same. I tried to tell you that. Tried to make you understand.”
“But you telling me and me seeing it for myself are two entirely different things.” At his look of confusion, she tried to explain. “That guy who you and Lucas were with was insanely hot. And yeah, it killed me to see you with Monica and Jenny and him, the three of them so sexy and perfect. The first thought that burst into my head was Ohmygod, I was right. I’ll never be able to compete with the kind of lovers he had at—”
“They weren’t my lovers,” he cut in, but she silenced him with a finger over his lips and went on.
“That’s what I was thinking, until I saw your eyes. And that’s when I finally understood what you’ve been trying to tell me. Because even in the middle of all that beauty, in front of all those greedy stares, you looked lonely. Even lost. So I get it.
“All this time, I’ve been terrified that I wouldn’t be enough for you. That what we have together wouldn’t be able to compare with what you experienced there. But now I know that’s nowhere near the truth, because when you’re inside me and I’m looking up at you, your eyes are the hottest, most intense, most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” she told him, smoothing the tip of her finger over one auburn brow. “They’re full of heat and warmth and emotion, and that’s everything. It’s the most beautiful thing you could ever give me.”
“Baby,” he groaned, looking completely undone, his blue eyes filling with tears.
“Your past is your past, Jonah. And at the end of the day, it really has nothing to do with me.” Blinking away her own tears, she said, “I just needed to know that I was enough for your future.”
“Christ, woman, you are my future. You’re all I want. All I’ll ever want. And I love you so much. So fucking much. I just want to spend the rest of my life proving that to you.”
Softly, she said, “Then why don’t you take me inside and prove it right now.”
* * *
Heat swept through Jonah’s body like a searing bolt of lightning, making him as hard as a fucking rock. He had no idea how they’d gotten to this point, after he’d feared losing her forever, and the only thing he could do right then was kiss the hell out of her again, because he felt like he might die if he didn’t.
Against her soft, sweet lips, he said, “Why don’t I go ahead and prove it right here?”
“Yeah?”
Jonah kissed the corner of her mouth. “I need to see you in my bed again.” He kissed the other corner. “I need to see your gorgeous little body laid out over every goddamn surface in that penthouse.” He nipped at her lower lip, then pulled his head back and looked her right in the eye. “But right now, I just want to slip your panties off, slide your legs over the arms of this chair, and eat out your perfect pussy until you come all over me.”
Despite the violent color in her cheeks, she didn’t shy away from his hungry, visceral stare. Instead, she matched it with one of her own. “Then what are you waiting for?”
A low laugh rumbled up from his chest as he cocked his head to the side, watching her carefully. “You’re not going to protest about fucking outside?”
Her smile was so tender it made him ache. “This is you, so that means it’s me.”
“Jocelyn, baby, I’m not sure that’s how it works.”
“I love you, okay? All of you. And I trust you. With that, I can deal with fucking outside or against a window. And I’ll enjoy it,
because it’s hot.” The look in her eyes got warmer…heavier. “But the real reason I’ll enjoy it is because I’m yours, and there are times when you like being wicked. And I happen to like being wicked with you.”
“Okay, angel,” he murmured, brushing his thumbs across her pink cheeks. “But from now on, we’re only wicked with each other. No other men for you, Jocelyn. Not ever.”
She placed her hands against his bare chest. “I can live with that, because you’re the only one that I want.”
“And other women will never be a problem,” he vowed. “I don’t want them. I don’t need them. Hell, I don’t even see them anymore.”
She gave him a pointed look. “No other men for you, either.”
Another gritty laugh rumbled up from his chest, and he kissed her lips. “Not a problem, sweetheart. I’m yours, I swear. Every single inch of me.”
“And I love them all, you know. Each and every one of them.”
And just like that, Jonah’s already strained control shattered.
“That’s it.” He pushed her cardigan off her shoulders, then gripped the bottom of her dress, ripping it up over her head. “I can’t wait,” he muttered, driven by need as he unhooked her bra, revealing her beautiful, pink-tipped breasts. He lowered his head, her soft cry of pleasure filling his ears as he hungrily sucked on one plump nipple, and then the other, starved for her taste. He kept working the sensitive tip with his lips and tongue as he tore her panties down her legs, then kissed and licked his way down her front, giving a nuzzle to the constellation of freckles on her midriff, before scraping his stubble-covered chin down the crease of her groin and thigh. “Jesus, this can’t be real,” he murmured against her skin, looking up at her through his lashes. “Am I dreaming? I’m fucking dreaming, aren’t I? Because this is too perfect to be reality.”
She smiled down at him as she stroked her fingers through his hair. “You’re not dreaming, I promise. But I can pinch you, if you want to be sure.”
“Yeah. Do it.”
She drew him back up to her, her sweet breaths panting against his lips. “Maybe I’ll just kiss you instead.”
“That’s the best fucking idea you’ve ever had, Miss Brenna. Do it right now. And don’t ever stop.”
She was still smiling as she leaned forward, and the instant her lips touched his, Jonah reached down and curled his hands under her knees, lifting and hooking them over the arms of the chair. Tearing himself away from the intoxicating kiss, he leaned back and stared down at her pink, glistening center, his mouth watering. “God, your cunt is so fucking pretty,” he husked, already lowering his head again. He groaned in ecstasy at the first touch of his tongue against her soft, drenched vulva, then ran his tongue up the length of her, curling it around her tender clit. “And it’s mine. All mine, forever.”
“Forever,” she echoed, fisting her hands in his hair and yanking him closer.
He went wild on her then, fucking her tight hole with desperate thrusts of his tongue, his throat working as he swallowed her warm juices again and again, needing her taste like he needed his next breath. He didn’t lift his head until he’d made her orgasm so hard that she screamed out into the night, his lips and chin wet with her cum as he curled his hand behind her neck and took her mouth with another deep, eating kiss, hoping she could taste just how sweet she was for herself.
“Love you,” he growled against her lips, before reaching over and grabbing the thick white towel that’d been left on the small table beside the chair. He flicked the towel open, spreading it over the stone slabs beside the pool, then picked her up again and laid her down on the soft cotton. Her skin gleamed like a pearl in the silvery moonlight, and his heart pounded as he came down over her.
“I need you,” she moaned, clutching at his shoulders, but he was already shoving his boxers down and driving himself inside her, her snug sheath giving slick, greedy pulses around his swollen shaft as he worked it in deeper…and deeper, the feeling so incredible his eyes damn near rolled back in his head. He was all searing emotion and animal need as he started to thrust in and out of her deliciously tight, plush grip, fucking her with everything he had, the poignant moment the most important of his life. Their love was a physical thing burning between them, binding them together, each second somehow more intense than the last, and he didn’t want it to ever end. Wanted it to go on…and on, until they were both too spent to even move. But when she came undone around him for the second time, screaming from the force of her pleasure, he couldn’t hold back, following her over with a harsh, guttural roar.
“God, Jace,” he groaned against the side of her throat, his husky voice thick with awe as he kept rolling his hips, stirring himself in the gallon of cum he’d poured into her. “Being inside you feels so perfect it’s insane. How do you do it? How do you make me feel this good?”
He could hear the smile in her voice as she said, “Because I love you.”
“Mmm. Don’t ever stop. Whatever you do, baby, don’t ever stop.”
“I won’t. Not ever,” she told him, running her fingers through his hair. “Just promise you’ll love me back.”
“Always,” he said, finally finding the strength to lift his head. “I will always love you. It’s the biggest part of me.”
She smirked up at him. “And here I thought that was your cock.”
With a rough laugh, he grinned right back at her. “Naw. I mean, it’s huge, but my love for you is fucking immense.”
She held his heavy-lidded stare as she stroked her hands from his shoulders down to the small of his back, both of them completely lost in the moment…and each other. Quietly, she said, “Tell me what you’re thinking.”
“That I could stay buried inside you forever, and it still wouldn’t be enough time.” He brushed a soft kiss over her lips. “I’m thinking that I need you and Davey here with me, where I can take care of you both. Protect you both.” With another grin kicking up the edge of his mouth, he looked into her eyes and said, “Spoil you both rotten every chance I get.”
A torrent of emotions shone in her shimmering gaze, making his chest burn with heat. “I want to do the same for you, Jonah. So I guess we’re a perfect match.”
“We are, aren’t we?”
She gave him a breathtaking smile. “I’ve never believed anything more than I believe that.”
“Then move in with me.”
Her eyes flickered with surprise, but her voice was gentle as she said, “Valerie can’t bother us now. Are you sure you wouldn’t feel better just taking things slow?”
“Fuck no. Every single instinct I have is telling me that you and Davey belong here, Jace. That it’s where you’re meant to be. That the three of us are meant to be a family.” He lowered his head, giving her another soft kiss. “My head’s actually screaming it. And my heart’s shouting it the loudest of all.”
A smile trembled on her kiss-swollen mouth, her green eyes glassy with tears.
“And I’ll beg if I have to,” he warned her in a husky rasp, his cock already hardening again inside her. “I’ll lick and fuck your sweet little cunt all night long, Jocelyn, begging you with every stroke and thrust, until you give me the answer I want.”
A dreamy-sounding sigh fell from her lips as she closed her eyes, and when she blinked them back open, he could see her answer, her love shining like a beacon in her glistening, tear-drenched gaze. Everything he’d ever wanted was all right there, staring back at him. Everything he’d never allowed himself to wish could be his, until he’d walked into that break room at Atlas and set eyes on her for the first time. But his girl gave him the words too, saying, “I love you, you crazy, beautiful man. I love you so much that it makes me ache when I’m away from you. So yes, we’ll move in with you. We’ll do it as soon as you want.”
“This weekend?”
The sound of her laughter was so fucking sweet it made him shiver. “If that’s what you want, then yeah. This weekend.”
“Thank God,” he growled, spre
ading kisses across her smiling face. “Thank you, baby. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.”
“And so long as you’re okay with it, we’re having Thanksgiving dinner with my parents on Thursday.”
“Yeah?” he asked, nipping her little earlobe before he lifted his head.
“Yeah,” she replied with another happy sigh.
“Awesome.” He smiled as he pulled his hips back, then pushed back into her with a slow, deliberate thrust. “It’ll be our first holiday together.”
“I know, and I can’t wait.” She gasped as he reached down and grabbed her behind the knee, the angle allowing him to go in even deeper as he lifted her leg. “Ohmygod, Jonah. How are you able to do this again so soon? I swear you’re not human.”
“And I swear you’re a fucking miracle. The bravest, most amazing person I’ve ever known, and I love you so goddamn much it hurts.”
Tears spilled from the corners of her eyes, but he didn’t panic, because he knew they were happy ones. “I’d do anything for you,” she told him, “because I love you too. I think I’ve loved you since that first day that I met with you in your office. You sat me down on your desk, pushed your hands into my hair as you kissed the hell out of me, and changed my entire world.”
The Next Play: Part Four: the play series | book 1 | part 4 Page 12