Davey nodded eagerly. “I could do that.”
Upstairs, he picked a book from the stack beside his bed, then crawled in and scooted over to make room for Pete.
With his kid snuggled up next to him, Pete almost forgot about his exasperation with Kelsey. He’d missed nights like this. They were far too rare.
Together they read the story, but by the last page Davey’s eyes were drifting shut. Pete closed the book, slipped off the bed, then pressed a kiss to Davey’s forehead. “’Night, son.”
Davey’s blue eyes blinked open. “’Night, Dad. I love you.”
“Back at you, kid.”
After Davey drifted off again, Pete stood looking down at him, his heart filled with such aching joy he could hardly stand it. This boy was a part of him. He deserved nothing but the best, but he wasn’t getting it, not from either of his parents. And there didn’t seem to be a damn thing Pete could do to change that.
He went downstairs, poured himself a glass of milk, then settled into a chair in front of the TV to wait for his ex-wife.
His eyes repeatedly drifted closed, then snapped open at some unexpected sound, but it was well after midnight when he finally heard Kelsey at the front door.
Pete flipped off the TV and stood up. When she rounded the corner into the family room, he stepped into her path. “Where the hell have you been?” he demanded, unable to keep his temper in check.
Defiance flashed in her eyes. “Out.”
“Not good enough,” he said coldly. “You knew I was bringing Davey back at five.”
“You said you were going to stick around, so I figured there was no reason for me to be here, too,” she said.
“An hour, Kelsey. I told you I’d be here an hour or so, not till after midnight. Dammit, didn’t you hear anything I said to you earlier? Didn’t your promise mean a damn thing?”
“Davey wasn’t alone,” she reminded him. “That was the deal.”
He sighed at her twisted logic. “Is this the way it’s going to be? Do you really want things to get complicated?”
She scowled at him. “Do whatever you need to do to feel like a big man, Pete. Frankly, I don’t care.”
He knew he’d pushed his luck by insisting on coming down here today, but he intended to push it even harder. It was past time he exerted a few more of his own parental rights, rather than bending over backward to keep things calm between them. Maybe she’d eventually get the message that he was losing patience with her games and that he was going to stick to the letter of the court’s ruling, which guaranteed him a lot more time with Davey than he’d taken advantage of up till now for the sake of peace.
“Okay, then, this is what I need to do,” he told her flatly. “I’ll be back next Friday to pick Davey up from school. I’m taking him home with me for the long President’s Day weekend.”
Fear flashed in her eyes at that. “Oh, no, you’re not. That’s not one of his weekends to be with you. I didn’t fight you this time, but I will fight you on that.”
He regarded her with bemusement. “Why? It’s obvious you’d rather be doing something besides taking care of our son. Consider this a bonus break for you. Besides, the court granted me four extended holiday visits a year. I intend to take this one.”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’ll find some way to use it against me. I love that kid. You’re not going to take him away from me. And I won’t let you spend time turning him against me.”
“You know I’d never do that, Kelsey,” he responded patiently. “What’s the real problem here?”
“I want him with me next weekend.”
He knew better, but he asked anyway, “Did you already have something special planned?”
“No, but—”
Pete didn’t know why he felt the need to push so hard for this, but he couldn’t seem to let it go. He cut her off. “You need a break, Kelsey. Let me give it to you. I promise I won’t hold it against you for saying yes to this. Have you ever known me to break my word?”
She looked as if she wanted to argue, but he knew she’d also started to consider what she could do with all that free time. “Okay, but just this once, right? You’re not going to start making it a habit?”
“No. We’ll stick to the schedule,” he promised. To the letter, he added mentally.
“Okay, then. I’ll let the school know you’re coming on Friday.”
They both knew it was a half-hearted attempt to prove she was in control. Both of their names were on the school list. Pete could have picked up his son without her permission, but he let her have her momentary feeling of power.
“Thanks. I’ll call during the week to find out when you want him back on Monday, so there’s no confusion.”
She nodded, suddenly looked oddly defeated. “Look, it’s late. Why don’t you just stay till morning? You could see Davey again before you go.”
Pete was tempted, but he’d learned a long time ago it was best not to accept Kelsey’s hospitality. The last time he had, she’d tried to crawl into bed with him. Getting her out had been awkward and unpleasant.
“I’ll be fine. I had a nap while I was waiting for you.” He pulled on his jacket and headed from the room. When he turned back, she still looked so dejected that he came back and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Take care of yourself.”
“Yeah, sure,” she murmured.
As he drove away, he realized she was standing in the shadows at the front window, staring after him. That, too, struck him as unbearably sad. It was the second time that day he’d felt a surge of pity for his ex-wife.
Pete was in an odd mood from the second he turned up on Monday morning. Once upon a time, Jo had been able to read him easily, but not this morning.
He’d arrived with another bag of those warm blueberry doughnuts, two extra large coffees and the usual lighthearted quips, but there was definitely something on his mind. There were unmistakable shadows in his eyes. To her dismay, she wanted to know what had put them there. She knew that asking would only draw her more deeply into his life, but she couldn’t seem to stop herself from wondering.
Even as he was outside pounding nails into wood with more force than necessary, she watched him, startled by the anger and tension that seethed just beneath the surface. He hadn’t said why he wasn’t going on to another job site, and she hadn’t asked about that, either. Maybe he was suddenly anxious to get this one finished so he could steer clear of her. She wasn’t sure she wanted to know, if that was the case.
But by lunchtime, she’d had enough. Two could play at the game of poking and prodding.
“Lunch is ready,” she announced cheerfully, enjoying the look of surprise in his eyes. He clearly hadn’t been expecting the invitation. In fact, he didn’t even look as if he’d realized what time it was.
Jo had made thick sandwiches with the leftover chicken, then made a pot of homemade vegetable soup with noodles, the way her grandmother used to make it. Pete eyed it suspiciously.
“You went to a lot of trouble.”
“Hardly. It’s soup and a sandwich, the same sort of thing you fixed me when you were worried about me.”
“Does that mean you’re worried about me?”
“Worried about all that lumber Ashley paid for, actually. The way you’re pounding on it, I expect it to split.”
“I know what I’m doing.”
“I imagine you do,” she agreed. “Usually, anyway. Otherwise I wouldn’t see your name in front of half the houses under construction around here. Today must be some sort of off day.”
“I don’t want to talk about it,” he said at once.
She studied him intently and concluded that the exact opposite was true. He was bursting to talk about whatever had him so upset.
“Is it that you don’t want to get into it at all or that you don’t think you should get into it with me?”
His expression turned sad. “There was a time we could talk about anything,” he
said, a wistful note in his voice.
She nodded. “We still can, even if it has something to do with your marriage or your son. Is that it? Didn’t things go well when you went to see him?”
He gave her a hard, searching look. “Are you sure you won’t mind if I get into this?”
“I won’t know until you start, will I?”
He told her about his call from his son and then his argument with his ex-wife. Before he could go on, Jo was already seething with indignation. “She actually left a six-year-old boy by himself at night?” she demanded incredulously. “How could she do something so irresponsible?”
“Then I’m not crazy?” he said, looking oddly relieved by her immediate and forceful reaction. “That is a really lousy idea?”
“Well, of course, it is. What was she thinking?”
“She wasn’t thinking. She was on a date and she was drinking. It happens more than it should. In fact, it might have happened again night before last, but I was there. I stuck around till she finally wandered in after midnight.”
“Then you have to do something,” Jo said flatly. “Protecting your son is the only thing that matters.”
Oddly, talking about Pete’s son didn’t hurt half as much as she’d expected it to. In fact, she found herself longing for a glimpse of him. She already knew from his picture that he looked just like his dad, but what about his personality? Was he full of mischief? Was he smart as a whip, the way Pete had been?
“I wish I could meet Davey,” she said, then faltered. “But that’s probably a bad idea.”
“Why would it be?” he asked. “At least from my perspective. What about you, though? Are you sure you really want to see him? I would certainly understand if you never wanted to set eyes on him.”
“How can you say that? What happened wasn’t his fault. And he’s a part of you. Of course I’d love to meet him.”
“Then you can have your chance to do that next weekend,” he announced, catching her by surprise. “I’m picking Davey up on Friday. He’ll be here till Monday. If you’re sure about this, we could get together on Saturday and do something.”
A part of her wanted to agree, wanted to say, “Of course, bring him by.” But somewhere deep inside, she was terrified of what might happen next. What if she fell in love with Pete’s little boy? He would never be hers. In fact, he was likely to be snatched away from her. Could she bear that? And how would his mother feel about Pete introducing another woman into Davey’s life—especially her? Would it only cause more problems between Pete and his ex?
In the end, though, it was the prospect of yet more heartache for herself that led her to a decision.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered eventually, “I think maybe it’s a bad idea, after all.”
She would have run from the room so Pete couldn’t see the tears gathering in her eyes, but he stopped her before she could take the first desperate step.
“I’m the one who’s sorry,” he said, gathering her close. “For everything. I shouldn’t have asked.”
She managed a watery smile. “It was my idea,” she reminded him. “Then I got scared.”
“Of what?”
“Falling for a six-year-old and then losing him the way I did his dad.”
Pete closed his eyes and pulled her close again. She could feel the steady beat of his heart under her cheek. It was reassuring and familiar.
“Just think about it,” he said at last. “I swear I won’t push you, but he’s such a great kid. I’d like you to know him. And I’d like him to meet you.”
“How will you explain who I am? Or has he met a lot of women in your life?”
“There haven’t been a lot of women in my life since his mom and I split up, but Davey hasn’t met any of them. You’d be the first.”
Her heart flipped over at that. “Then why me?” she asked.
His gaze locked with hers. “Don’t you know?”
She was afraid to guess. “No.”
“Because you matter, Jo. You always have.”
Chapter Ten
Jo’s head was spinning. She’d never expected Pete to tell her that she mattered to him, not like that, not so soon. She’d almost come unglued and burst into tears right there in his arms. Wouldn’t that have been a pretty picture?
She couldn’t let those impulsively spoken words turn her world topsy-turvy, she told herself a thousand times in the following days. It wasn’t as if he’d declared his undying love, after all. You matter to me, that’s what he’d said. Not I love you. Heck, the accountant who kept his company books probably mattered to him. So did the guys on his crew.
But even though she tried hard to put those four simple words in perspective, Jo kept hearing the underlying meaning in his voice. It was as close to an admission of love as he could give her right now, probably as close as he thought she could accept.
But was it enough to give her the strength it would take to meet his little boy? That child, through no fault of his own, had changed her life forever. How would she react when she saw him? She knew instinctively that she would open her heart to him, and that terrified her most of all.
But as terrified as she was of being hurt again, Jo knew she had no real choice. She wanted to see that child, to get to know him, to see how much of Pete she would find in his eyes. If anguish and regrets over dreams lost came with that, so be it. That was a small enough price to pay for sharing something—someone—so important to Pete.
Even though her decision was essentially made, she kept it to herself. She didn’t want to have to take her words back later if she chickened out. She could tell, though, that her silence on the subject was driving Pete just a little bit crazy. He’d promised not to push her, so he wouldn’t, but every time they were together during the week, he watched her, his gaze questioning, asking all the questions he’d promised not to verbalize.
Finally, on Thursday, Jo couldn’t stand the wary, surreptitious glances another second.
“Okay, yes,” she said as they drank coffee and ate doughnuts at the kitchen table in what was turning into their morning ritual. It felt so damn comfortable and right, that the routine scared her, too.
Pete blinked and stared at her. “Yes?”
“Let’s all do something together on Saturday. You, me and Davey.”
His eyes lit up and a smile spread across his face. It was as if she’d granted his wish or something. Perhaps if she’d realized how much it meant to him, she would have told him sooner.
“Really?” he asked. “You’re sure?”
She held up a cautioning hand. “Let’s not make a big commotion out of it, though, okay?”
His gaze narrowed. “Meaning?”
“We could just hook up at one of the sites, make it look accidental. You know, like it’s no big deal.”
He looked as if he might argue, but evidently he, too, saw the wisdom in that. “You’re probably right,” he said at last. “That would be best.”
“Then, if you wanted, we could grab some lunch or something. Maybe a burger. Does he like hamburgers?”
“Next to pizza, they’re his favorite.”
“Would it be better to go for pizza, then?” she asked worriedly, wanting this meeting to go right. She knew she was placing way too much importance on it, but she couldn’t seem to help herself. No matter how they played it, for her it would be a very big deal.
Pete reached across the table and put his hand on hers. “Hey, stop fussing. We’re not going to place too much importance on this, remember?”
“I know, I know. I don’t want to make a big production out of it for your son’s sake, but for me it’s different.” She drew in a deep breath and steadied her resolve. “That doesn’t mean it needs to be a big deal for him, though. I just want him to have a good time, do things he enjoys doing, you know?”
“You want him to like you,” Pete concluded, cutting straight through to the bottom line.
“Okay, yes,” she admitted, chagrined.
; Pete grinned at her. “With any luck, all of this plotting every minute will be wasted, anyway.”
“Why?” she asked in alarm, fearing that her already out-of-control hopes were about to be dashed. “Do you think he might not come?”
“Oh, he’s coming,” Pete said, his expression filled with grim determination. “But there’s snow in the forecast for Friday night. Quite possibly, we’ll be able to spend Saturday sledding and building snowmen.” He winked at her. “Then I can send the kid to bed and you and I can get all cozy in front of a fire.”
The prospect sounded so inviting, she forced herself to put up at least a token protest. “I don’t think so.”
“Why not?”
“With your son in the house?” she asked, her tone chiding.
He gave her a piercing look, as if he’d read something into the comment she hadn’t intended. “What about after he goes home?” he asked. “Can we get cozy then?”
She met his gaze and made a decision that had been a long time coming, even though it had been inevitable. “I’d have to say that’s a definite maybe.”
“Not as much conviction as I’d like to hear, but I’ll take it as a positive sign,” he said. “Now I can hardly wait to take the kid home. What kind of father does that make me?”
“A human one,” she said. “And maybe it’s something you need to remember when your ex-wife doesn’t stop to think. She’s only human, too.”
“The difference is that I would never leave Davey on his own, no matter how desperate I was to be with someone else.”
Jo slid out of her chair and walked around to the other side of the table. Impulsively, she slipped onto Pete’s lap and cupped his face in her hands. “I know. That’s what makes you amazing.”
Heat immediately blazed in his eyes. “And I thought all along it was my hard muscles you liked.”
“Nope. Your tender heart,” she told him, tapping on his chest.
“You know,” he said quietly, “Davey’s not here now.”
She met his gaze, her heart in her throat. “I know, but there’s no snow on the ground, either.”
For the Love of Pete Page 12