by Evie Harper
“You didn’t have the decency to contact me, to send me a quick text message to say, ‘Hang in there’ or ‘I’m still here, wait for me.’ You ignored my pain and loss so easily, and then you turned every good memory we had into a painful one. When you disappeared at the lowest point in my life, you turned my love for you into hurt and confusion.”
Mack steps back and his face pales.
“Yes, I made a stupid decision five years ago to try to get comfort from someone who deserved better than a false moment, and it turns out that mistake had graver consequences than I could have ever imagined. I’m sorry I hurt you, but don’t stand there and put all of this… all we lost… solely on me. That’s not fair.”
“It was three weeks, Lana. Do you know how small of a time frame that is in life? That’s nothing. You didn’t even try to hold onto what we had. That shows me it never held any weight with you, that I was easily replaceable. I want a woman with guts, loyalty, and a strong mind, who will fight through the hard times, not run away.”
I sigh. He doesn’t get it.
“I should’ve gotten back to you sooner,” Mack replies in a hoarse voice. “Your voicemails, they killed me. Fuck did they kill me. But I got lost in my head, in the bottom of a bottle for longer than I care to admit. I hated Jae so much and the situation. I wasn’t someone to comfort you in the days following his death, I was someone who wanted to kill him all over again.”
“I can understand that, Mack. I don’t want to believe my father was capable of rape. But even me, his own daughter, I knew he had something dark inside him. Nevertheless, I needed you and it would’ve taken as little as an ‘I’m here’ in a text, Mack. I needed something.”
Mack lowers himself to the bed and bows his head. “You deserved that. I realized my mistake a long time ago.”
Silence fills the room and Mack stays frozen staring down at the ground. Everything about him appears the same as if five years of violence and fear hasn’t ravaged him as I feel it has me. But then again from what I know of his childhood, the past five years has probably been a walk in the park.
As I memorize each new scar on his hands while they flex through his short brown hair, I quietly admit to myself that I still love him. I never stopped. The hate I had built up—to keep him out if we ever crossed paths again—steadily recedes. Never had I imagined he had come back to me, and I’m not prepared to stop the flood of emotions, past and present. Do I want to stop those feelings? Years of wishing he had, and he did. It feels as if a tidal wave is building inside me, a gate opened, a bridge lowered, a yes which was forever a no. I want Mackson King and now I can allow myself to be okay with that.
What should I say? How do I ask him if he wants to rebuild what we thought was lost forever?
Mack stands and his stare takes hold of mine. His next words cause everything colorful around me to turn gray, every hopeful thought to fall flat and my heart to cease its skipping beats.
“But there’s no going back. I can’t forgive you for being with another man when I considered us together, in love. I need loyalty in my life, Lana, without it I can’t breathe. It’s essential to how I survive in this life.”
I don’t speak nor do I move as Mack watches me for one last long moment before he turns and leaves the room, shutting the door between us.
I slowly lower myself to the bed. My body stiff while a painful tightness takes hold of my throat. That’s it then, over before it could begin, again.
A little while later I’m staring out the window, sitting on a wooden chair, feet up and knees under my chin when Pacer walks into the room with a sandwich and bottle of water. He explains Slater will be home soon and then there will be a family meeting.
He waves his hand around the room and says, “Della has girly shit to do in here until then.” He leaves and I hear the familiar sound of a chair being pushed up under the door handle.
I used to play basketball with these boys, teach them how to write and spell over dinner in my family’s kitchen, and now they’re locking me in a room and stopping me from being able to leave.
I sigh and resume staring numbly out the window.
I hope the guys got Rex to their doctor for the bullet in his leg. He’s taken them in much worse places before, so I know he’ll be okay, most likely a few days on some crunches and then Rex will chuck them away and limp everywhere painfully in order to not look weak with crunches.
I huff out a laugh.
Some time later, I hear raised voices and what I think are quite a few heavy footsteps coming up the stairs. I place the book I was reading onto the desk and stand to face the door, assuming this will be Slater.
The door bursts open, but it’s not who I thought it would be. A slender brunette stands in the doorway, her mouth wide and her eyes rapidly blinking as if she’s hoping I’ll disappear with each blink.
“Oh my god,” she breathes.
Slater walks in past the woman, his eyes on me until he stops between us and looks to the brunette. “I had to make a split-second decision to get my brothers and I out alive.”
“Kidnapping,” the woman snaps. “I work for the government, Slater. Pretty sure kidnapping is frowned upon.”
She works for the government? What the hell am I mixed up in?
Slater smiles. “Baby. Notorious gang, shootings and illegal car racing. Pretty sure that shit is already frowned upon. Anyway, kidnapping is nothing,” he says in a matter-of-fact voice while casually placing his hands into his jean’s pockets. “Plus…” Slater glances at me and winks “…Lana is an old friend, it’s more like a forced get-together.”
The woman blows out a big breath and her eyes meet mine. “I’m Piper.” She smiles and sticks out her hand to me.
I take a step back and look to Slater. “She’s with the boys in blue and you’re calling her baby?”
“Piper isn’t a cop, she’s a protection officer for kids,” Slater replies and my eyebrows shoot up. For as long as I’ve known the Kings, they’ve run from and hated Child Protective Services.
“It’s a long story,” Slater replies to my surprised expression, and when he does Mack steps into the room and walks to the back wall. Leaning against it, he watches me.
My blood boils instantly. Why does he have to be here? He’s made his feelings towards me quite clear. So why the hell is he anywhere near me? When I realize my stare has turned cold and angry, I shift my gaze to Piper and decide to see what kind of woman she is. Not just anybody can be with a street thug. I’ve watched enough women leave Rex calling him insane and they’ve been right most of the time.
“So you’re the one my brother is trying to kill,” I state in a detached voice.
Piper's eyes narrow dangerously. “I hate your brother. If I ever meet him, he will not walk away with his balls still attached.”
It takes a lot to hold back my grin when Slater bursts out laughing. She’s fiery, and this has to be one of the few times I’ve ever heard Slater laugh.
Piper doesn’t take notice of Slater as she decides it’s time to stand her ground. “I thought you might be different from your brother. Actually, I’d heard you were. But it seems we need to get a few things straight—”
“No need,” I interrupt. “I’m nothing like my brother, in that I’m not upset about my father’s death.” Piper gasps as Mack and Slater visibly stiffen. “However, I do love him whether he’s an asshole or not, and while I couldn’t care less if he has balls, I will be the one who has to listen to him bitch about it.”
I give her a wink to let her know I’m just messing around and Piper surprises me by understanding and smiling. “Ooh, I like you.”
I smile.
Piper looks to Slater. “You said she was shy and I’d have to be nice and gentle with her?”
My eyes meet Slater’s curious ones. “Well, it seems a lot has changed in the past five years. Can’t say I’m not happy you finally found your backbone, Lana.”
“Slater,” Piper admonishes.
&nb
sp; “It’s okay, Piper. Slater’s right, back in the day I was pretty pathetic.”
Piper frowns and Slater says, “That’s not what I mean.”
And Mack growls, “Don’t talk about yourself that way.”
I physically feel as if my eyes glaze over with ice as I turn my death stare toward Mack, but say nothing to him. We all stand in silence for a moment before I decide to break it, but not before I notice Piper’s curious eyes darting between Mack and me.
Did he keep us a secret all these years?
“Not to burst anyone’s psychotic bubble, but I do know none of you are going to hurt me. I’m not Rex, who believes y’all are the devil incarnate.”
Directing my next words to Slater I say, “You took the only family my brother has left. He hated you before for taking just one, how on earth did you think this would help?”
Slater places two fingers between his lips and lets out a high-pitched whistle. Within seconds Pacer enters the room, my head twists left to right, noticing I’m suddenly surrounded by Street Kings. Just missing one–Kelso.
“Because, Lana…” my eyes find Slater again “…this is all we had left to try. If this doesn’t work then Rex will leave me with no other choice but to kill him.”
My breath catches and my shoulders stiffen. “You can’t,” I declare softly, yet firmly.
Slater sighs heavily. “What other choice do I have? Let him hurt Piper, definitely not,” Slater finishes with a growl.
Piper moves to Slater and places a hand on his back and it seems to calm him down. My mouth opens and closes foolishly. I’m desperate to fight for my brother’s life, to save him, but I have no words to defend his actions. So many people have already died doing his dirty work. Their own choice to do so, yes, yet still at his orders. Slater is as protective of Piper as I am of my brother, and it’s not her trying to kill Rex.
I bow my head understanding there’s nothing I can say or do to help Rex, I can only pray that he loves me enough to give up this war for my life.
“Lana,” Slater calls my name and the soft tone of his voice has my head quickly rising to find a frown marring his face and sadness in his eyes. Glassy irises search mine, for what, I’m not sure. “Will you understand why? Recognize that Rex left us with no other option? And will you tolerate us and let past sins lie?”
Heaviness hits my chest as I realize Slater’s worried I’d come for revenge. Just as Rex has for the past five years. Would I? If he takes Rex from me, then he’s successfully destroyed my whole family. Yet knowing he might doesn’t fill my veins with rage, only grief that I have been unable to save my brother. I couldn’t save myself against my father when he was alive, but I’m determined to keep my big brother with me; to piece together what grief and rage have taken from me.
My stare bounces around the room from one person to the next. I’m trying to keep up with my thoughts and understand what I’m about to do. It’s then I notice Mack has moved closer to me—almost within touching distance—yet I feel no warmth from his skin on mine to comfort me.
Focusing back on Slater, I nod and a stray tear escapes. “I will understand and move on with my life. I would leave Louisville far behind.” My words come out strangled and I wipe at my face quickly.
Slater lifts his chin in thanks and goes to turn and leave, but I’m not finished.
“Wait.”
Slater turns back around, his eyes swirling with curiosity.
“Until that moment, I need to be with my brother. Separating us, you having me, it’s only going to send him further over the edge. Let me go home and I’ll talk to him. Really show him how far he’s gone, I’ll beg if need be. He’s already partly seen how bad it’s gotten with Della being hurt, give me the chance to push him a bit further, please.”
“We can’t.” It’s Mack who speaks this time. “If we send you back, Rex is going to laugh at us. They all will. We have to stay strong and act as if we will follow through with our threats. Otherwise, Rex is going to assume we’re weak and he will come for us sooner and less prepared. Then he’ll walk directly into his own death.”
“Mack’s right,” Pacer adds. “Rex isn’t going to give up this war because his sister begs him to. I’m sure you’ve already tried that anyway?” Pacer asks with a raised eyebrow, but I stay silent. The thickness in my throat doesn’t allow me to speak right now, to let them know that Rex has ignored my pleading over the past five years. “He’ll refuse you, and you’ll send him to us sooner, and we will be prepared. This way, he has a life he cherishes in his hands, he won’t take that so lightly… we hope,” Pacer finishes on a whisper.
Rex, choose the right path, please. I wish I had the confidence in my brother to know, without a doubt, he’d do whatever it took to save my life.
“Seven days, Lana,” Slater says gently. “Rex has seven days to save his own life.”
With Slater’s devastating words, they all walk out of the room. Mackson is last. I sense his hesitation, and for a split second, I consider begging him to stay, to hold me and tell me everything will be okay. Instead, I stay silent and he gives me his back as he closes the bedroom door.
I walk to the window and stare out into the night sky, and with a jolt of hope shooting through my chest I decide to find a way to save my brother, even if I have to do it from afar.
Chapter Four
Lana
Sitting at the large table eating French toast, which Pacer made everyone for breakfast, I glance around the kitchen remembering when Della and the guys first moved in here. It had been bare except for a table and a toaster and some cutlery. Now it’s filled with furniture, pictures, bookshelves and many more things that make this house feel like a home.
I finish my last slice of toast and take my plate to the sink, placing it on the side, where all the morning’s dishes have piled up. Turning around quickly, eager to head back up to my holding room, I smack straight into a damp, bare chest.
My palms are met with solid, defined abs. I blink once, then twice as I inhale sharply from the wondrous sight in front of me. A large chest covered in beautiful intricate tattoos, all in classic shadings of black, white and gray. Words across a hip, just above a pair of dark sweatpants garner my attention. ‘You don’t know what you’re alive for until you know what you would die for.’ The black calligraphy is wrapped around the word ‘family’ which is shaded in gray. It’s one of the most beautiful tattoos I’ve ever seen.
My eyes swiftly rise to identify who I’m looking at. Mackson. My gaze lands directly on irises the color of soil with speckles of gold throughout them, eyes I memorized over a decade ago and still couldn’t forget, even in my dreams. The carnal intensity swirling in Mack’s stare causes my heart to race and my skin flushes as if the lick of heat from a fire is nearby.
My breathing becomes erratic and in an attempt to get a hold of my senses I take a quick step back, except my body is met with the kitchen bench. Mack takes that same step forward, plus a bit extra, and suddenly every inch of his body is pressed up against mine.
I exhale in a rush from the shock of intimacy Mack is creating between us. What is he doing? Do I care about the why? No, I don’t, the touch of his skin and the smell of the soap that’s coming from his freshly showered body is all I can think about right now.
My eyes lock with Mack’s. I’m searching for his next move. Should I make it or let him continue to lead? His stare gives nothing away and my hands ache to explore his body, from the tips of my fingers down to my toes, my body tingles with anticipation. Swiftly every tingle and ache dissolves as Mack shoves a piece of French toast into his mouth, steps back, looks at me blankly and then walks out of the kitchen without a word.
I glance behind me to see the plate Pacer filled with toast for us all. Heat rises up my neck and my heart beats rapidly against my chest as embarrassment engulfs me.
That asshole. He knew exactly what he was doing.
I walk swiftly out of the kitchen, wanting… no, needing a shower to wash away
my humiliation. I pass the living room, but don’t look to see who’s in there until I’m halfway up the stairs and I peer into the room and find Piper and Slater talking to Mack. I don’t spare a smile for Piper, who looks my way, all I can bear at the moment is a death stare aimed straight at Mack’s back.
Argh. I hate him.
After a long cold shower, I rummage through Della’s drawers and pull out some clean underwear and a pair of black shorts with a matching T-shirt, which has a blue skull on the front. I love the top.
I find myself staring out the same window I tried to escape through yesterday. Mack’s words that I would be killed were a bit overdramatic. Yes, a fall from here would hurt like a bitch, but I’d survive.
I jump and yelp when the bedroom door flies open, feeling as if I have been caught doing something wrong.
It’s Pacer at the door, first staring at me shocked and next he laughs out loud. “Am I really that scary?” He breathes on his hand and then sniffs his hand. “Or is it my breath?”
Mack arrives at my door, fully dressed this time, body tense and eyes darting around wildly, appearing as if he’s ready for battle just as I giggle at Pacer.
Pacer pats Mack on the shoulder. “All good brother, it was just me. I should’ve knocked before opening the door.”
Mack shrugs stiffly and then leaves just as quickly as he appeared.
“If I were a nosey man, I’d ask you what the hell is going on between the two of you, especially after yesterday. But I’m not, so I’ll just say what I came up here for. Are you good with paper?”
My forehead furrows and I scrunch my nose. “Am I good with paper?”
“Yeah, you know computers… words on paper? I got a whole lot of paperwork sitting on Della’s desk in the garage, and I can’t figure out what it all is and the phone is ringing off the hook with parts that we’ve ordered and need to be picked up. But I can’t figure where to find it all and Slater’s taken off for a drive with Piper and this shit can’t wait. I know, in the old days, when we knew you, you’d help your dad out in the garage so I just figured you could help me?”