“You’re sister’s great,” I said as I followed Bo into the kitchen.
“I love her so much. When our parents died we grew even closer; we’re all each other have left. My parents have family on the West Coast, but we’re not close with them.” While his voice was sweet when discussing Rachel, there was a tense undercurrent of worry.
Bo’s phone rang. His face darkened when he looked at the caller ID.
“Um, I’ll leave you alone; I’m going to wander up to the widow’s watch.” I gave him a quick peck on the cheek, turned on my heels and didn’t look back - having an idea what that call was about.
The winding stairway to the upper most point in the house was brightly lit from the sun. When I reached the top and opened the door, Rachel and I both jumped.
“Sorry, Bo got a call so I’m wandering.” I stood outside of the room.
“Come in, silly. It’s not like I’m naked in here,” Rachel laughed.
When I entered, I gasped at the view. I didn’t know the city limits of Concord, but was pretty sure I could see them from where I stood. The stained glass window cast rainbow shadows throughout the room, but enough natural light peered in to keep out the church feel. The windows went all the way to the floor, where Rachel sat cross-legged.
“Sit.” She patted the dark wooden floor next to her. I sat, mimicking her position, and admired the view.
“It’s so peaceful,” I whispered.
“Isn’t it great? I feel like I’ve spent half my life up here,” she said wistfully. “So, you’ve had some meetings with Bo at your organization, right?” She turned to me.
“Yeah, we had a couple last week, including one with David Bryson,” I said, looking back at her.
“So, then, you know ‘my story.’” She put in air-quotes.
“Oh. Yeah, I do.” I shrugged, trying to keep emotion out of my voice.
“I just don’t want you to feel uncomfortable around me. I’m working on myself all the time. Everyone knows, most people aren’t assholes about it.”
“Most people?”
“Well, you know, when you’re in your early twenties, your friends tell you they just want you to come out with them ‘to dance’ or just ‘hang out.’ Sometimes I can do that, no problem, but it’s the days that I’m feeling sad, depressed, angry, or otherwise weak that I don’t want to be around all of that. So, I don’t go out, and they don’t always get it.” I was impressed by her maturity and confidence.
We sat in silence for a few more seconds, before Bo’s footsteps drummed up the stairs.
“There you guys are,” he said as he entered the room. “Rae, I thought for sure you sent Ember running for the hills.” He sat between us.
“Ha. Hardly, Bo. You have no idea how happy it makes me to finally see you happy,” Rachel cooed as she rested her head on Bo’s shoulder.
Watching them, it was the first time I realized that I couldn’t comprehend the weight that had been on Bo’s shoulders for the past few years. The thought sent fresh tears to my eyes; I excused myself and made a bee-line to Bo’s bedroom.
When I got to his room I called Monica.
“Hey Em! How’s the trip?” She sounded cheerful, which was a good sign as far as she and Josh were concerned.
“It’s great so far. You should see his place - it’s a fucking palace. He has a recording studio in his basement.” I stopped there to avoid revealing my parents album that she had no idea about.
“You sound weird, is everything OK?” How does she do that?
“Yea. I met his sister, she’s great Mon. She loves Bo so much, it’s lovely to see but heartbreaking at the same time, knowing what they’ve been through.” I felt better getting it out there, and the tears stayed at bay.
“Well, he’s amazing, we all knew that. Have a great rest of the weekend and call or text me with the inappropriate details.”
“Hey, wait, how are things with Josh?”
“All good.” I could tell by the smile in her voice that he was standing next to her.
“Get a room. Bye.”
Suddenly, exhaustion bested me. Bo and Rachel were still up in the watch talking, so I crossed over to the bed. As I lay back, on top of the blankets, the emotional ups and downs of the week caught up with me and I gave in to the warm embrace of sleep.
* * *
“Ember. Hey,” soft whispers pulled me from a deep sleep. “Babe, wake up.” Bo kissed from my forehead to my collarbone.
I peeled my eyes open. According to the alarm clock it was 6:00pm; I’d been asleep for a few hours.
“Shit, sorry, I was exhausted.” I sat up slowly and tilted my head side to side. “Did I miss Rachel leaving? Did she go back to school yet?” I yawned.
“No, actually she likes you so much she wanted to stay and have dinner with us. She’s meeting some friends right now and we’ll catch up with her at the pub in an hour. Wanna shower?” Bo grinned ear to ear.
“Mmm. You bet I do.”
I sat up on my knees and rapped my arms around his neck; pressing my mouth to his. He responded by forcing my hips back down to the bed. Without wasting time, I pulled his shirt up and tossed it on the floor. He did the same with mine, before reaching for my pants.
“I love you, November.” He kept his hands on my face as he pulled away. Every single time he’d said that, he’d looked right in my eyes. This time was no different.
“I love you,” I replied, gripping the back of his neck.
Whatever spell he had me under, I didn’t want the cure. I could live the rest of my life bewitched by the likes of Bo Cavanaugh.
We showered and got ready to go meet his sister for dinner. I was glad that we didn’t have sex before we left the house, neither of us would have been able to remove the grin from our faces.
“Hey, by the way, if you ever need to get into the gate at the end of the driveway, 7325 is the code,” he said nonchalantly as we pulled off his property on to the road.
“How mighty trusting of you.” I winked.
“Come on, Ember, you have my heart and soul, what’s a gate code?”
“Are you serious? How do you come up with that stuff?! I mean, it makes me swoon, seriously swoon. But, come on.” I stared at him with an open mouth.
“What? It’s true. Look, I learned the hard way the lesson of telling people exactly how you feel because you don’t know if it could be your last moment together.” He stared straight ahead, driving down the road.
“Oh, true . . . Sorry.” I turned back to the road.
When we arrived at the restaurant, Rachel was outside talking with some friends who were smoking. She beamed when she saw us.
“Guys! Over here!” She waved frantically.
“Hey Rae, do we have a table?” Bo asked.
“Yeah. Guys,” she gestured to her friends, “this is Bo’s girlfriend November. Hot name, right?” She bragged while I shook hands with her friends outside.
Girlfriend. The word made me blush as soon as it left her lips and it didn’t go unnoticed that Bo reddened, too.
When we were seated inside, Bo asked if I wanted a drink. I shot a cautionary glance toward Rachel.
“Oh, please, go ahead. I’m fine. You’re sweet.” She touched my hand and narrowed her eyes playfully at Bo. “Don’t fuck it up with her please, she’s awesome.”
Bo shook his head and wandered up to the bar.
“You’re great, Rachel,” I turned toward her while Bo got my drink.
“Please, call me Rae. And, you’re great. Bo’s been infinitely happier since he started spending time with you.”
“What, is he typically depressed or something?” It dawned on me I had no idea how Bo was day-to-day.
“No, it’s not really anything like that. It’s just . . . since he started getting DROP off the ground again, he’s been all business. He doesn’t spend a ton of time with his friends - which is OK, because most of them are staunch dickwads anyway - but I sometimes feel he’s missing out.” She shrugged a
s she played with her straw.
A rather excessive giggle caught my attention across the restaurant.
“Who’s that?” I nodded toward a slender strawberry-blonde woman talking to Bo. Her head was cocked to the side like a puppy.
“God, that’s Bowan’s ex-girlfriend. Can we say ‘Stepford Wife’? This is a pub, lady, ditch the pearls already.” Rachel barely looked in her direction, which I took to be a good sign.
“Hm. She’s pretty, what’s her name?” I asked, trying to be indifferent.
“Ainsley Worthington.”
“Of course it is.” It slid out before I could stop it.
“Ha!” Rachel spit some of her water back in her glass.
“What?” I cracked a smile.
“What do you mean, of course it is?”
“Seriously? Worthington? Could there be a wealthier name in all of New Hampshire?” I raised my eyebrows.
“Yep, Cavanaugh, which is why Ainsley’s panties are all in a bunch over there,” Rachel panned. “She and Bo were already broken up, but after our parents died she tried using his grief to get back in his pants because she’s a complete tramp. Bo hasn’t given her the time of day in four years, but bless her heart she keeps trying. It only got worse after he started playing here. You should see the spectacle she makes of herself.” Rachel rolled her eyes.
“Rae, I think I’m in love with you,” I laughed.
“Well, seriously, her family has plenty of money,” she giggled, “Can’t she stay away from ours?”
Bo nodded in our direction, and Ainsley looked at us, causing Rachel to smile and wave excitedly. I guessed that Rachel had words with her at one time or another by the way Ainsley forced a smile and a barely polite wave back. Ainsley gave Bo a quick hug before he turned and walked back to the table.
“Sorry guys,” Bo said as he sat down.
“Yeah, we saw,” Rachel said cynically.
“What? Rae, cut me a break! Ember, are you pissed?” Bo’s voice rose to an unnatural octave.
“What? Me? Noooo,” I exaggerated. “I don’t know her, so it was less her personality that bothered me and more her hands’ proximity to the rest of you.”
“Ha, ha,” Rachel hooted, “Bo, marry Ember today, right now. What the hell is Ainsley doing here anyway? Are there no other restaurants in Concord?” Rachel paused for a moment before her face lit up in a wicked grin.
“Oh the poor dear, she thought you were going to play tonight, didn’t she? She didn’t count on Ember - oh my God what did you tell her about Ember?” Rachel was nearly bouncing in her seat.
“She didn’t ask. She probably thinks that Ember’s one of your friends, and I’d like to keep it that way for now.”
“Um, what?” I couldn’t keep the irritation out of my voice.
“Smart, bro. You see Ember, as I said before, Ainsley is a tramp.”
“Rae!” Bo said tersely.
“Prove me wrong Bo, prove me wrong. Anyway, she’s a tramp, so if she knew Bowan was with a girlfriend, it would only make the situation worse. But, since she’s left the restaurant with her tail between her trampy legs, feel free to engage in all the PDA you want.”
“Classy Rae,” Bo said as the waiter came to our table. We broke in to laughter and placed our order.
While we ate our dinner, I was overcome with the heartening feeling that Rachel was the sister I never had.
Chapter Twenty
“Bye Ember, it was great to meet you,” Rachel said as she climbed into her Lexus.
“You too. See you Monday. Rachel.” I smiled and waved as she drove away.
“I had a great time tonight,” I said to Bo as we headed back to his house. “Rachel’s a trip, I like her a lot.”
“She really likes you, too.” Bo grabbed my hand.
“I love seeing you two together; makes me kind of bummed that I’m an only child.”
“She’s my world. Rather, was. Now you’re in it too.” He kissed a smile against my knuckles.
“I love you,” I sighed as his kisses sent chills throughout my body.
When we got to the house, Bo led me wordlessly up to his bedroom. He kicked off his shoes and lifted my dress over my head before carrying me to his bed. He set me down and backed up to unbutton his shirt. He slid into bed next to me, pulling me close.
“I meant what I said before, you know; ‘love’ just doesn’t cover what I feel for you, Ember.” He kissed me from my neck to my ear.
Taking his time with sweet movements, Bo kissed my entire body. Our bodies moved together as they had since we met. I gripped his back with all my might, approving the pull from within. Bo kept his forehead on mine, our lips never parting as our bodies formed one picture of pure emotion.
Neither one of us made a single sound aside from our heavy breathing. My throat was choked with feelings I never knew I held inside; we made love - true love. The word ‘love’ seemed so bland in comparison to what happened between our bodies. I could barely wrap my head around what we expressed; there truly were no words. Our bodies spoke our souls’ language.
As one motion flowed seamlessly to the next, I realized I could do this forever. Forever is not a word that’d ever been a part of my vocabulary; but as I drifted to sleep in Bo’s solid arms, it was the only word on my mind.
* * *
The deepness of my sleep did not keep the dreams away.
“Hey, hey! Are you ok?” the distant voice echoed.
“Yes,” I whispered, looking around for the source of the voice.
“Get out of here,” the voice demanded.
“But-”
“Out!”
I woke breathless and in a panic, disoriented by my surroundings. I steadied my breathing when I remembered I was in Bo’s bedroom but when I looked to my left, he wasn’t there. The clock read 2:51 AM.
“Bo?” I climbed out of bed and threw on his t-shirt and my panties.
I paused in the doorway leading to the hall and listened, but couldn’t hear anything.
“Bo?” I said again, heading down the stairs.
The cold granite floor of the foyer was unforgiving against my bare feet. A soft melody drifting through the air broke through the massive scale of the dark house. I made my way through the living room and kitchen and stopped at the top of the stairs leading to the basement. I could hear the music louder now; it was a single guitar playing in the studio.
What the hell is he doing down here at this hour?
I tip-toed down the stairs. The studio door was open, allowing the sweet melody to meet my ears. Bo’s back was to me and he was hunched over his guitar; the only light came from a single lamp on the piano. He was shirtless, and sat only in his black boxer briefs. Goosebumps formed on my arms and I wondered how he could be comfortable in the cold room.
My eyes sketched along the strong lines and deep contours of his body. Each time he slid his left hand up and down the neck of the guitar, the muscles of his back flexed in response - a visual metronome. The large black cross on his back stood in stark contrast to the sparseness of the room and caused me to catch my breath. My soul begged on bended knees for me to run to him; to give in to the physical craving that burned at full heat between us.
“Hey.” I rapped lightly on the door, to avoid scaring the hell out of him.
Bo turned around quickly and his eyes brightened, “Hey, did I wake you?”
“Hardly, you’re all the way down here. I woke up and you weren’t next to me so I came looking.”
Don’t tell him you had another nightmare.
“Well, here I am.” He put his guitar down and opened his arms.
“Couldn’t sleep?” I asked as I sat on his lap and wrapped my arm around his neck.
“I don’t typically sleep well, not in the last few years anyway.” His previously light tone was now raked with sadness.
“Oh . . .”
“I like having you here, November; it’s nice to have someone else in this big, old house. Rae’s here, but
she stays with friends a lot to avoid driving back and forth to school every day.” A blanket of loneliness swathed his eyes.
“I like it here; the house has a real family feel to it.” I grimaced at my lifelong desire to live in a single-family house.
“Hey, about earlier, when I pushed you about your parents and how you grew up - I’m sorry. It wasn’t my place. I can’t imagine what my life would be like right now if I’d never had a place to call home.” He grabbed my hips and turned me so that I was straddling him.
“Don’t worry about it. I’ve never really thought about it that way before - my parents still calling the shots.” I shrugged, “But, ever since I met you, I’ve considered another lifestyle entirely - you know, running away and all - so it’s nearly a moot point.”
I kissed him teasingly, but he grabbed my chin and pulled me in for the real deal; I could feel his grin on my lips.
“Rachel said you can still play the piano. Play something for me. I’ll sit in the recording room; I’ve always wanted to hear how things sounded in there.”
“What do you want me to play?” His reticence was poorly concealed.
“Whatever is on the stand,” I said, walking into the control room.
Bo’s brow crinkled a bit, then relaxed as he took a breath and headed to the piano. I looked around for the speaker switch in the control room and, when I flicked it on, I heard another deep breath come from Bo as he sat on the bench.
“Let’s see what you got, rock star.” I winked into the mic.
Bo didn’t look at me, and I noticed his mouth formed into a slight frown. He tilted his
head to one side, then the other, before stretching out his fingers and hitting the keys. He didn’t warm up, he just took off. I was wrapped in the blanket of the dark, bittersweet song that came from the piano. Bo’s shoulders moved in time with his hands; he was a sight to behold.
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