She let out a surprised gasp with the touch. “I have never thought much about the stars.”
Alex kissed her hand, although gloved it was still an intoxicating moment. “With a horse named Starlight, I must admit I find myself in shock over such a pronouncement.”
Debra shuddered with his touch. There were three possible reasons for this reaction. If negative, he’d misread her reason for dressing so handsomely. If positive, he might be on the cusp of receiving forgiveness for his stupidity. The third reason was temperature. The October air was bitter in the evenings, and her wrapper wasn’t heavy enough to keep her completely warm.
“Are you cold, Love?”
“Yes, we should rejoin the party.”
“Debra, I want to speak with you before we do.”
“More constellations?”
“No, darling, I need to apologize for a great many things, but especially for the words I said on our wedding day.”
“Is this in response to your father’s edict?”
Alex let out a sigh of frustration. “No. I do not care about being disinherited. First of all, my younger brother is too ill to be an earl, let alone a duke. Second, my mother would never allow my father to disown me.”
“Then what is the purpose behind your apology?”
“I told you I wanted to grow in accord with each other. If we continue to stay apart, how are we to do so?” Taking a deep breath, as he knew the words she needed to hear were not yet in the open, he continued, “I never thought the words I said would hurt you as they did. I wanted to protect you as I knew you wanted a marriage of love. I should have told you months ago how attractive I found you when we first met. I fell in love with you as you stood in the barn and told me to leave without a care for my health.” He let out a light laugh as his nerves took over. “I was too blind to notice it was love.”
Debra nodded. Alex poured his heart out to her, and she was reacting far too calmly for the pounding in his chest and head.
“Tell me, my lord, if I had not gone down the destructive path with Lady Margaret, would you confess such things to me?”
Hesitating for less than a second in order to speak with exactness so there could not be a misunderstanding, Alex realized it was a mistake. He’d hesitated too long. He should have responded immediately. “I would have said the words. Eventually. I cannot know when.”
“How kind of you.” Debra stood, and without another word left him sitting on the patio. He’d messed the conversation up, again. Alex stayed where he was, trying to make sense of his life and mistakes. He’d made so many missteps over the past few months, and while going over them in his mind, he had a hard time choosing the worst of the actions.
Asking Margaret to marry me! Staying in the barn with Debra! Marrying Debra without realizing I was in love with her! Stating I did not want to set up a nursery! Each item he listed off made him sink lower and lower on the bench. He stayed out in the cold, looking up at the stars until a call for dinner came to him.
He escorted Debra into dinner and helped her with her chair. Looking around the room he groaned when he saw Debra’s Uncle Bosworth. The man was an imbecile and didn’t know when to shut his mouth. If this meal was as disastrous as the last they’d had together, Alex could not fathom the consequences to Debra’s fragile self-esteem. The soup arrived. Alex decided he would keep quiet. Everything he said to his wife caused her pain, and he had no desire to converse with others.
“I was thinking about purchasing a book.”
Alex raised his eyebrows in surprise. The conversation could be the start of something more meaningful. “Oh?”
“I wondered if you could suggest something.”
“I must admit I am pleasantly surprised to hear this. I will have to consider the best I have read, before giving a recommendation.”
Blocking Debra’s response, Uncle Bosworth opened his slobbering drunk mouth to add to the conversation. “I heard a hint of a scandal hit your family this summer Norwood.”
“I do not know what you are referring to, Bosworth.” Lord Norwood said in a tone Alex wouldn’t cross if he were the slobbering drunk.
Bosworth didn’t stop. He plied himself with wine as the soup course ended and the footmen brought out the second course: chicken, artichokes, and cauliflower. “I recall the conversation surrounding Lady Debra’s dowry and her reputation.”
Lord Norwood nearly flew out of his chair as Bosworth spoke, but Lady Norwood’s stern look kept him from throttling her brother. “You are mistaken, Brother. We did discuss Lady Trenton’s dowry, as she and Lord Trenton were engaged, but there was not a conversation regarding her reputation.”
The stern tone he spoke with, sent the room back to private conversations. Alex tried to remember where he and Debra had been on the topic of books when he heard Lady Grey from across the table. “Lady Trenton, have you seen the latest story in Peterson’s Magazine?”
Debra’s cheeks turned a slight pink. “Yes, I did.”
“By your reaction, I can tell you know the exact story I speak of.”
“Yes, I believe I do.”
“What is this story?” Alex asked looking to his wife.
Debra shook her head as though she would not tell him, so Lady Grey filled him in. “Voluptuous Desires.”
Alex nearly spit his drink out with the name of the novelette. “Pardon me?”
“Oh, come now, Lord Trenton, you are not such a prude,” Lady Grey taunted. As though she were thinking out loud, she continued, “There was a terrible storm in Sussex this last spring. I remember reading about it in the newspaper. It sounds exactly the same as the storm described in the story Voluptuous Desires.”
Alex decided to ignore Lady Grey. He turned back to Debra, “May I take you to the bookstore tomorrow?”
“I would appreciate your assistance.” Debra’s voice sounded strained.
“What has you so upset?” He thought it better not to ask, but Debra had turned into a mess of nerves. “Are you unwell?”
“I have a confession to make, Alex.” With these words her face went pale.
Alex didn’t know what he expected her to say, but her words were cut off by Lady Grey.
“Lady Trenton, what do you make of this Sir Anthony Briggs and his writings? He is stretching the boundaries of propriety with his novellas. Do you not agree?”
Sir Anthony Briggs, why does the name sound familiar? Alex partially listened to Debra’s response, as he was trying to remember where he’d heard the name before. Have I read something by this gentleman? If a man who wrote a book named, Voluptuous Desires, could be considered such. His mind wandered through the rest of dinner trying to bring back the memory of how he knew Sir Anthony Briggs.
When the women left to spend their time in the parlor, Alex stayed behind with the men. Briggs, where have I heard the name? He wondered as he joined Samuel and Leigh’s conversation. He’d decided to push the name out of his mind when the memory came back. They’d sat in a cold barn speaking of her writing when she revealed the pen name she planned to use for publication. Standing by the window, Alex released the glass he was holding. It shattered on the ground. Debra!
“Trenton, is something wrong?” Samuel asked putting a hand on his shoulder.
“What?” Alex asked focusing on the conversation.
“Trenton, you do not look well,” Leigh said with concern.
Shaking his head to clear it, he noticed he’d not only made a mess, but he’d caused a scene. Alex bent down to clean the mess.
“Let Drake handle the clean-up,” Lord Norwood said coming over to the group. “What happened?”
“I apologize, Lord Norwood. I was not thinking, and I had an accident.”
“You still have not answered me, you look pale. Are you unwell?” Samuel looked worried.
Embarrassed from dropping his glass and the knowledge of his wife’s publication, Voluptuous Desires, Alex shook his head. “I am not good company tonight. I think I should leave for Mayfai
r House.” Turning to his father, who’d joined them, he finished, “I think I will walk. Will you and Mother accompany Debra home?”
“Do not tell me you are worried I will take all your pocket money in a game tonight?” Baker drawled from his position on the couch.
Alex did not care for an argument. Ignoring the jab aimed at him, he looked to his father. “I will be fine; I just need some air.”
“Not a chance,” Lord Norwood said taking his arm. “You look ill. I will not have you collapsing in the street. You and Debra will stay here for the night.”
Instead of arguing and making a scene, Alex acquiesced, and allowed Samuel and Leigh to lead him to a bedchamber. It was nicer to be alone. He had time to think about Debra’s choice. Frustrated and hoping to stay off the argument he knew was inevitable, Alex dressed for bed and lay in tormented silence as he considered the fallout if people were to discover she was the writer. Right before he fell asleep, he realized he’d need to obtain a copy of the magazine so he would know what the story entailed.
The following day, Alex lay in bed long into the morning trying to wrap his mind around his marriage and his wife. He’d known Debra was obsessed with writing, but he’d thought she’d keep him apprised of her choices for submitting a manuscript. He'd spent time talking to her about the writing. He’d asked questions about it and kept tabs on who the characters were in her books. He’d even taken the time to list the characters out and all of the information he knew about them so he could carry a conversation with her.
When was the last time I asked her about her characters? Before we were wed. Since arriving in London, he had all but ignored his wife until the dreadful situation with the chemicals. They went to evening parties together, but he had no idea how she spent her days. When they were at parties, he spent most of his time in the game room, while he assumed she spent time with her sisters and friends.
They’d been married four months, and he knew her less now than he did when he married her. It was his own fault. When he’d alienated Debra, the result was a lack of honesty between them. It was no wonder she published without telling him.
After dressing for the day, Alex made his way to the parlor where the butler told him he would find Debra. They were supposed to go shopping for books, but he wanted to take her for a walk. His heart pounded as he slowly made his way to the parlor. Would she be receptive to him? It was possible she’d still be angry. Everything he’d tried the night before with the stars and whispers of her beauty were for naught as she’d not responded. He’d have to make a drastic gesture of repentance.
“Lord Trenton,” Lady Norwood said as he entered the room, “I was concerned when my husband told us you were unwell last evening.”
“No reason to be concerned, my lady. A full night’s rest has set me right.”
“You missed the morning meal. I will send to the kitchen and have a tray brought up for you.”
“There’s no need, but I thank you.” Turning to find Debra, he said, “We have a busy evening set for us. We have only a short time before we need to set out for the theater, if you still want to attend.”
“Yes, I was hoping you would be well enough.” Debra crossed the room with caution. She had a worried look about her. He wondered if she knew he’d recognized her pen name.
“Stay for an hour or so, Trenton. I would like to take the money you should have lost to me last night.” Baker stood as though Alex was stupid enough to follow him to the game room.
“No thank you, Baker. I am not in the right humor for spending time with you.”
“You are afraid to lose?”
“No.” Alex gave him a bored look and hoped the message was clear. He did not care for the man, and apparently Baker forgot the night Alex beat on him for his insensitive words toward Debra.
“I will have Norwood send for our carriage to take you home.” Lady Norwood said with a nervous glance in Alex’s direction.
“No need, my lady, I think a walk will do me some good… unless you would prefer the carriage?” he said to Debra.
“I will walk with you.”
Chapter 27
Borrowing a coat, shoes, and a day frock, Debra held her husband’s arm as they walked. Alex dressed in Samuel’s day clothing, so they weren’t overdressed for a short walk through London. Even with all of these added items to talk about, Debra had a difficult time speaking to her husband.
“I am sorry I turned in early last night.”
“I am concerned about you, Alex. I checked on you once I heard you were unwell, but you were already sleeping.”
“I believe it was more stress than being unwell.”
“What are you stressed about?”
“Sir Anthony Briggs.”
Debra closed her eyes so she wouldn’t see the look on his face. She did not want to know if he were happy or mad. But why would he be happy? She’d gone behind his back and published a very shocking and racy novella. She’d sent a second manuscript in a few days ago as well. The new novella The Maiden Wife was set to be in the next issue.
“I should have told you about my finished manuscript.”
To her surprise, Alex gave a grimace and asked, “Will you tell me about the story?” He was making an obvious effort to please her, and it was working.
She did not hide her excitement. With the hope this meant an acceptance of her as a wife, she squeezed his arm. “I rewrote Cordelia and Percival and I mixed them with our story.”
“What part from our story did you use?”
“The storm. Although I did not put them in a barn. I had my characters find each other in a cave.”
“The one you pointed to on our horse ride?”
“You remember it?”
“Yes, Love. I remember everything about our time together so far.” He gave her a genuine smile. “Please tell me you only guessed at kissing, and the other relationship items you needed. You did not make good on your threat to ask a footman for assistance?”
Debra’s eyes went wide as heat filled her face. She dared not tell him his mother was her source, but she needed to ensure he knew she was as much a maiden now as on the day they met. “Lord Trenton, I have a female confidant who helped me write those scenes. I have as little experience now as I did on the day I asked for your help.”
“I apologize for asking.”
They walked in silence for half a block before she spoke again. “Alex, I sent a second manuscript to the magazine.”
“I did not realize you have had enough free time to write a second manuscript.”
“I stay up late, and you know I prefer to write instead of crochet or embroider, but this one I finished while recovering from my incident.”
“Tell me about this new one.”
Debra hesitated. His reaction to the first one was surprising, but he already knew about the manuscript. This one, was more of an anger piece, and she’d shared the hurt of being ignored by her husband in the prose.
“I named it The Maiden Wife.” She waited for his reaction. When there wasn’t an immediate response, she looked up to see he looked to be processing her words. She walked beside him, fearful of an angry outburst, although he’d never been angry with her, she deserved to be yelled at.
“Another story based on our marriage?”
Whispering her response, Debra looked straight ahead. “Yes.”
“May I ask, this confidant you have, does she know we have not consummated our marriage?”
“Yes. I asked for her advice after I wrote the scenes, and she was willing to share her thoughts.”
Debra stopped in surprise when Alex next spoke. She dared not meet his eyes, for fear of dying under his gaze.
“Darling, I am ready to set up a nursery. We should begin today.”
Removing her hand from his, she covered her blush. “My lord, I find this a bit sudden.”
“I wanted to wait to court you and get to know you, but I find your need to write these types of stories to be distressing, and eve
rything that has happened over the last two months has helped me to realize I need to prove my feelings to you.”
“I do not understand. How will furthering our marriage change anything?”
“When you are a mother, you will not have enough time to write such novellas. When we have done our duty as husband and wife, you will realize I find you terribly handsome and there is no need to distress over what you see as imperfections.”
Debra smiled. She knew as a mother she’d still have time to write her manuscripts, as women of their social standing hired nurse maids. But, experiencing a relationship as more than casual acquaintances who accompany each other at parties and speak about bland everyday activities lent an air of intrigue to her. “I agree with you, Alex, I think my mind needs other pursuits.”
Alex held his arm out for her again, and they finished their walk to Mayfair House. Debra thought to remind him of the promise to go to the bookstore, but they could go another day. Finding a level of comfort with each other warmed her heart.
He walked with her up to the bedchamber. For a moment, Debra waited for Alex to kiss her hand and make a comment about discussing the situation further. Perhaps they would continue the conversation after the theater, but when he followed her into the chamber, her heart sped up.
Nervous, as she’d received instructions from her mother the night before her wedding to let the earl take charge, Debra didn’t know what to do. She’d read so many novellas and they always cut off before intimate moments. When the duchess helped with Voluptuous Desires, Debra giggled over the information as it completely disregarded her mother’s advice.
Looking into Alex’s eyes, she saw the intensity of his desire, and found it was much more satisfying than what she’d imagined in Lord Percival’s gaze when looking upon Cordelia. From the tension, she realized when Alex said he found her handsome, he’d been sincere.
Wit & Intrigue (An Assignation to Remember Book 1) Page 18