So I take my time, working her nipples, fitting both into my mouth at the same time, until her hips start to sway, to seek me out. I could fuck her now, of course, but no. It’s too soon.
I let her slippery nipples slide from my mouth and I start rubbing and squeezing the tight peaks with my fingers and thumbs until she’s gasping my name. She might be on the cusp, just from nipple play, and I don’t want her coming yet. So I take her hips in my hands and turn her body so she’s twisted slightly, on her side. I push one of her knees forward so her legs are apart and I spread the round cheeks of her ass and start licking her there, pushing my tongue into the tight little cove. She wriggles and squeals – I expected this – so I pin her down and push my tongue deeper, licking and prodding into her until she calms. I get her ass nice and wet and start rubbing her with my fingers, pushing her legs wider apart. She’s feeling it now and she’s swaying along with my movement, writhing gently and moaning. She might be a virgin but she’s a horny-as-hell little livewire who, tonight, is up for anything.
“You like it dirty, darlin’?” I murmur.
“Yeah.” She’s lust-drunk. Her words are slurred, her voice husked. “Yeah.”
“You want me to make you come now? You think you’re ready?”
“Yes. Oh, god. Jake.”
I turn her body again so she’s on her back again. I spread her legs wide and pin them down with my arms so she can’t move. I lean close, breathing my hot breath on her pussy so she can feel me there.
She’s waiting, almost trembling with anticipation. And when I give her my tongue, sliding into her core, she moans my name. I withdraw, and, avoiding her clit, I start to lick her open. I part her with my tongue, licking everywhere, sliding my tongue inside until she’s saturated. Her sweet honey is dripping down my chin and I can feel my own pre-cum starting to spill. I lift her hips so I can eat her harder, plunging my tongue as deep as I can get.
She’s begging me now, trying to writhe closer to me, moaning that she wants me to make her come, to give her my cock, to fuck her. I almost smile. “Little Zara’s got a dirty mouth,” I say, and she moans louder.
“Please fuck me now, Jake. Please.”
First I want to make her come again so she’s nice and soft for me. I move to her clit and I know once I get started she’ll come. So I take it real slow to begin with. Very, very lightly I lick her clit. I circle it with my tongue. She’s still now and her moans are low and quieter.
I lick all around her clit, exposing the hard little nub. Then I close my mouth around it and start to suck on it. At the same time, I push two fingers into her pussy and one into her ass. I work the rhythm and I can feel her body tightening. She’s at the peak and her body gently convulses before her pussy starts clenching tightly around my fingers. Oh, fuck, that’s gonna feel so insanely good around my cock.
I keep sucking her clit until her orgasm spins out. I give her a few seconds before I do it again. This time I bite the lips of her pussy, squeezing her clit between as my tongue glides in to press against her nub. At the same time, my fingers push deeper. She comes again almost immediately, hard. Her body tenses tight before she gives in, and the waves in her core tug at my fingers like she’s trying to draw me in.
Inviting me inside.
I don’t want to wait any longer. I want to get inside that unbelievably tight, wet little wriggling body.
I reach for one of the condoms in the pocket of my jeans and roll it on.
She’s still rippling. Her pussy’s still pulsing and dripping. I put the head of my cock against her, and it looks huge there. I almost wonder if I’ll fit. This is definitely going to hurt her, but she tilts her hips up, pushing herself against me. She’s so wet I slide in a little but she’s snug and I don’t get far.
Her eyes are open, and she’s looking at me with this crazily peaceful expression. She’s incredibly lovely and she wants me so much, there’s something overwhelming about it. Something real and connective that sends a twinge of emotion into my soul that’s wildly unfamiliar.
I care about her.
I care about how she feels.
I want to make this a beautiful experience for her.
“You all right, Zara?” I whisper, and she nods and smiles at me.
“I’m more than all right, Jake,” she whispers back. “I love how good you feel.”
I – almost – recoil at the mention of that word. Love. I’m about as far out in left field when it comes to that particular emotion as it’s possible to be. I’m pretty sure I’m incapable of loving anyone or anything. I love my brother, I guess. I need my brother, more accurately. But as far as women go, I really don’t think I have that capability. Just another glitch in the fucked-up mess that’s my psyche.
So I don’t say anything. And I’m glad she said that. It’s kicked up that jagged edge of madness in me. The rage that’s never far below the surface. I need it now. I need to push past that concern, that I might hurt her. I will hurt her. The dark side of me doesn’t care so I focus on that. I push deeper into her – oh, fuck, she’s tight – and she’s gasping now but holy hell it feels too good to hold back. I have to have more of this. Fuck, it’s too fucking good not to take everything. I can feel the thin barrier of her virginity and I thrust through it, driving my big cock deep inside her body. She cries out and the sound does strange things to me, bringing me back to myself. Every other time I’ve made a woman cry, it’s triggered some animal rage in me that spurs me and makes me want to hurt them even more.
Not this time.
This time I slow my movement. I stop. I’m as deep as I can go and the tight beauty of her is almost more than I can take. I could come right now. But I wait there. I lift my head to look at her face and her tear tracks are shiny in the moonlight. I use my thumb to wipe her tears. “I’m sorry,” I hear myself say.
“It’s all right,” she whispers. “It’s okay. I want you to. You’re just so … big.”
“I’ll be careful with you. That’s the only pain. Everything else I do will make you feel good. I promise.”
“Jake?”
“Yeah?”
“Will you untie my hands?”
I balk at this suggestion. She might touch me.
“Why don’t you like to be touched, Jake? Or kissed.”
I’m a little shocked at her bold question. No one’s ever asked me that before. I pause for a few seconds. “I just don’t.”
“I won’t hurt you,” she whispers. “I’ll be careful with you.”
That shocks me even more. A woman’s never said that to me and something about the way she says it is exactly what I want to hear.
I decide to do it. For her. And maybe for me, too. Maybe just to see what it feels like. Maybe Zara Ashe has the power to replace one of the many horrific memories with something sweeter.
I unbind her wrists and she smiles, almost shyly. There’s something heart-breaking about that little smile. She lets her hands fall to her sides and leaves them there.
I’m still deep inside her body and the snugness of her pussy squeezing around my cock is like some kind of divine torture. I can tell she’s a little uncomfortable with all that fullness inside her by the way she’s gently wriggling. Each movement brings me closer to the edge. I can’t think clearly, I’m so close. I have to concentrate on maintaining control.
So I focus on her pleasure.
I suck on her nipples as I finger her clit, squeezing it gently between all my fingers. She starts to moan and I can feel the honey of her desire wetting my cock. I use this to nudge deeper, to draw back a little and push deeper still. I let her wet nipple slip from my mouth and I watch my cock glide in and out of her body as I work her clit. Her virgin blood is on me and I’m about to lose it but I don’t want it to be over yet. I just want to watch her.
She’s starting to come. Whatever pain I caused her is fading out, overwhelmed by the pleasure my thick shaft is delivering. Her eyes squeeze closed and she’s grabbing fistfuls of the sheets
and her pussy tightens painfully around me, milking my cock with her sweet, clenching pleasure.
Fuck, it’s the most beautiful thing.
I give her my cock, pushing her orgasm further with careful, deep thrusts as I press and play with her clit. The spasms of her body lengthen and her cum glistens around the base of my buried cock as she ripples around me. I work her further, so she comes again – or keeps coming. It’s a long, rich orgasm. I can tell by the flutters of her flesh and the way her fists have loosened, like she’s free now. Like the lust and the pleasure has fully liberated her, body and soul.
Her eyes open.
They’re green even in the darkness.
“Jake, roll us over. I want to sit on you.”
I don’t move at first. Partly because I can’t. I’ve been on the knife-edge of an orgasm for a while now and if I move, I might come.
I’ve never let a woman ride me before. It would mean giving up total control. It would mean we were equals in this game.
“Go on,” she says, her voice crazy-soft and sweet. “I want to make you come.”
I do it. I’ve already given Zara Ashe more of myself than I’ve ever given anyone. And it’s true: I have wondered what this might be like. I roll over, holding her hips, making sure to stay deeply inside her as I position her astride me.
She looks amazing, with her big breasts pale and glowing in the moonlight and her long hair falling in light-tipped dark waves. She’s black-and-white in the darkness, except for those bright green eyes, watching me.
She starts to move. She starts sliding her tight, slick pussy up and down my rigid shaft. Each time she sinks down I pull her hips against me so she’s deeply impaled. And each time, the orgasm gets harder and harder to hold back. She’s using her snug pussy to try to make me come. When I grind her little ass against me with each downstroke, she squeezes around me. Excruciatingly.
Fuck.
She increases her pace, gyrating and clenching as she rides me. She’s coming again. Oh, fuck, it’s too much, and just as I’m about to come, she places her palms against my chest, touching my scars, roving and feathering her soft hands.
My orgasm explodes with brutal force, coursing through my entire body and out my cock in thick, jetting bursts which tip Zara over the edge and make her scream her soft moans. I’m bucking up into her and she’s writhing and meeting my thrusts and it’s the most intense thing that’s ever happened to me.
My whole body’s coming. My whole being is coming.
The intensity of it is wild and life-changing, like I’ve been broken open and finally, some light has found its way into my dark soul and broken heart.
Zara
We just lie there for a while, panting, covered in a sheen of sweat, listening to our racing heartbeats begin to slow.
I’m lying on top of Jake.
We’re still moistly locked.
He doesn’t seem to mind that my head is resting on his chest and my hand lays unmoving on his shoulder. In fact his arm is slung around me. Almost like he’s pulling me closer now instead of pushing me away.
There’s not much to say.
We’ve touched each other and in some ways changed each other. It’s once of those rare things in life, where the alchemy of one night and another person’s placement in the grand scheme of things is perfectly aligned.
Jake Wolfe is not my destiny and I’m not his, we knew this from the beginning. And we wouldn’t trade what we’ve shared for anything.
In time, we get up. He goes to the turret’s little cloistered bathroom and brings a warm washcloth to clean me. He carefully dresses me and asks me if I’m okay.
I am.
I’m better than I’ve ever been.
He leads me out of the party and makes sure my helmet’s on securely then he drives me back to my house and we sleep in his bed until there’s a knock on the door and it’s his brother.
Jake’s gone for the rest of the day and I step back into my normal routines of homework and friends. Vivi gets back from her weekend away and we have dinner together. I don’t tell her about Jake but she notices a difference in me. She tells me she’s never seen me looking more beautiful.
When Murph texts me, I tell him it’s over and that I don’t want him contacting me again. I don’t bother with vague, teasing replies this time: I just tell him to fuck off. And I end up getting a B+ in my Business Administration class (with no extra help).
Jake’s brother winds up finding him some arrangement with a guy he knows who commutes to Princeton every day from the city, so it turns out Jake will stay with me only occasionally. And my sister decides to come home for two weeks for an internship at some law firm.
Which all works out just fine.
A few weeks later, I meet a guy in one of my classes who I never would have noticed before. He has dark hair and an edginess that, in my former life, I would have steered clear of. Now I know better. Turns out his dad manages several hedge funds and is grooming his son to take over his business. He’s also looking for a few star business students to train.
Sometimes I feel like Jake Wolfe was sent to me to help me see myself in a clearer light. In a stronger light. In the kind of light where shadows only enhance the sunshine.
I like to think that we did that for each other. I hope so.
Every now and then I hear news about how he’s doing. Working for his brother, who’s now a billionaire CEO. Jake’s had the occasional run-in with white-collar lawmakers. I even saw him once, not long ago, now that we both live in the city. He was wearing one of those home-detention metal bracelets and carrying an apple pie. He was walking out the door of this new little restaurant everyone’s talking about. And he had the kind of smile on his face I never thought he was capable of. Back then, maybe he wasn’t.
Now, I guess times have changed. There’s only one thing that can make a person smile like that. It makes me happy to think that he’s found it.
Jake
High school, thank fuck, is over. I am officially free to wander the earth as I choose. Alexander’s right, though. I’m going to live with him for a while and work for him as I take a few college business classes to see how it pans out. Besides, I need money before I can wander the earth, as Alexander loves to frequently point out. He’s already given me a job as an assistant to one of the guys who handles his investments. Not that he has many yet, but I guess that’s the whole idea: to build up a portfolio and see if you’re any good at building wealth. It interests me more than publishing so that’s where he’s put me.
As long as the guy I’ll be working with isn’t a complete asshole, I think it’ll be fine.
I’m ready.
I didn’t end up seeing much of Zara after that night. Her sister turned up and soon after that, Zara met some other guy she started spending a lot of time with. I had a friend of Alexander’s who works as a private investigator check him out and watch him for a while. Just to make sure he’s not a creep or something worse. He turned out not to be and as far as I know the two of them ended up living happily ever after.
It’s cool.
We knew going in that we were never going to end up together. That night remains, and probably always will, as one of the best of my life. That particular fuck was the best I ever had, so far at least. It didn’t feel like merely ‘a fuck’. It felt like a whole lot more than that. It felt like two people merging and coming out the other side more complete. It felt like making love, which might sound cheesy as hell. But it did. Even though love had nothing to do with it.
Or maybe it did. Maybe just for one night, it did.
Either way, I’ll treasure her and I’ll treasure the thought of her for a long time to come. She taught me not to be afraid, in some ways, which is a fucking beautiful gift.
I’m not afraid anymore.
I’m not afraid of myself.
To know that I can give like that, and survive it: it’s made me a better, stronger person.
And so I go armed into the rest of
my life with the knowledge that maybe – just maybe – I might be capable of love, eventually.
It’s time to go. I’ve packed what few belongings I have and I knock on Zara’s door. She’s alone, studying. She gets up off her bed and walks over to me. “You’re leaving?”
“Yeah.”
She reaches up to touch my face with her hand and I let her.
“Thank you for changing my life,” she says. It sounds dramatic but I know it’s true, just like it is for me.
“Thank you for changing mine. You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever met,” I tell her. It’s the goddamn truth.
“Right back at you, Jake Wolfe,” she says.
She kisses my cheek and I let her. Her lips are soft. I do something I’ve never done: I give Zara a hug. It doesn’t freak me out like it would have, even a few days ago. With Zara, it’s okay.
“Goodbye, Jake.”
“Take care of yourself, Zara. Treat yourself like the beautiful genius that you are.”
I turn and start walking out. But she touches my arm and I turn back. I notice she has tears in her eyes but she’s smiling, too, almost. “Go out there and find your true love,” she says. “She’ll be the luckiest girl in the world.”
So I did.
It took me ten years to find her.
Also by Juliette Jones:
Read BILLIONAIRE (Part 1)
Coming soon:
JAKE (BILLIONAIRE, Book 3)
HOT SUMMER LOVE
Connect with Juliette Jones:
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I felt a cool sense of confidence as I rode the elevator skywards, not because I thought I was in the running for the job I was about to interview for, but for the opposite reason. It was a dream job, beyond the scope of my experience, and I knew I was unlikely to score a gig this good. Sure, I had an English degree from Princeton; I’d graduated near the top of my class; I’d brought along a portfolio of publishing credits. But I was hardly alone in those credentials. The small, neat ad for CEO’s assistant at Skyscraper would attract the best of the best. Every college graduate within a three-state radius would be clambering to get their résumés seen. Not because we had a lifelong dream to be a CEO’s assistant, but because an underling job like this one would lead to other opportunities within the company. And it was a company that every aspiring writer and journalist alike would have sold their teeth to work for. That rare combination of glamorous and highly acclaimed, Skyscraper was the It magazine of the year. I knew most of the other applicants would have more experience than I had, which happened to be exactly none, since I’d graduated only two weeks ago.
Taming Jake Wolfe Page 8