“I wasn’t that hungry. I had a sandwich earlier, and, I mean, it’s not as if I did much to work up an appetite. We sat on a plane all day.” She smoothed one of his dress shirts on a hanger and buttoned the top button. Even just touching the rich material, she could feel the high quality, and that made her uneasy.
She did, though, kind of like this small bedroom, with its comfortable double bed, a patchwork quilt, a chair by the door, and an older six-drawer dresser. The window overlooked the pasture, and, even in the dim light, she could make out the cows grazing and moving in the field through the parted gossamer curtain.
Neil put the empty suitcases under the bed and then patted the mattress. “Did you know this used to be my bedroom, growing up?”
Candy felt a flutter inside as Neil grinned and leaned back on the bed. The top button of his dark blue dress shirt was undone, and he wore neatly pressed jeans. How did he manage to look so good all the time? She couldn’t help herself as she walked toward him and put her hand in his, letting him draw her down beside him on the bed. She lay on her back, and Neil leaned over her.
“Are you okay, honey? You never really answered me before.” He slid his hand over her cheek, smoothing her long, dark hair back. The way he looked at her, with such heat in his eyes, she prayed it would never fade.
A knock on the door stopped her before she could say anything.
Neil didn’t move or let her up when he glanced at the door and said, “Come in.”
Emily poked her head in, grinning at the two of them. “I hope I didn’t interrupt. I was just running in to town. I have to pick up some things. Brad’s getting the kids ready for bed. Candy, do you want to come with me?”
Neil glanced at her. “Well, you know, Candy, we could help Brad put the kids to bed. You could spend some time with my nieces and nephew.”
He had the biggest grin on his face when he talked about the kids. Candy had nothing against them, any of them, but she also didn’t feel the urge to jump in and look after any kids. Hell, no. She wanted to go with Emily, get out of the house. She also knew why Emily was asking.
“You know what? I could use some fresh air, and I’d love to go with Emily. Let me get my coat.” She slid off the bed, her hand still in Neil’s, and he frowned as if trying to read her and finding himself unable to do so. Well, she hoped he couldn’t read her, anyway; so she bent down and pressed a chaste kiss to his lips before pulling away.
Emily stepped away from the door and glanced down the hall, keeping her expression guarded. She said to Neil, “Brad has all the kids in the big bathtub in our bathroom.”
Neil put his hand on Candy’s lower back. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay and help?”
She wondered why he was pushing it. Maybe he wanted to see how she was with kids. Was he testing her? He seemed so into them. She knew he wanted kids, she just hadn’t realized how much. He would be an amazing father, but she was scared out of her mind at the thought of being a mother, because she didn’t think she could be anywhere near as good with kids as he was.
“No, you go have fun. I’m going with Emily. I need to pick up some things, anyway,” she said. Then she realized she didn’t have a dime on her. How was she going to buy a pregnancy test with no money? Neil paid for everything—she had nothing—no property, not a dime to her name. She felt her face flush with embarrassment. She couldn’t ask Emily to buy it for her.
“Well, what do you need? I’ll get it for you,” Neil said. He was yanking out his wallet, and she couldn’t believe the wad of cash he had in there. He pulled out several bills and glanced from Emily to Candy.
“Candy, I’ll wait for you downstairs.” Emily touched her arm and then moved away.
Candy stared at the money and felt such loathing at herself for needing it and for being so dependent on Neil. She blinked back a burning in her eyes. What the hell was the matter with her? She wasn’t weak.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Neil asked as he touched the side of her head so softly, gently.
When she looked up at him, she could see the depth of how much he cared, and it hurt, and it terrified her. Just days and weeks before, she had wanted this so much. “Neil, I don’t have any money, and I feel like a nobody next to you. You have all this money. You just open your wallet and take it out, and you toss it away. I can’t do that, and I don’t want to take it,” she whispered. She didn’t want Brad or Emily to hear how pathetic she sounded.
He held her face between his hands. “Hey, you listen to me. I will always take care of you. You’ll want for nothing. You take this, and you get what you need. I need to take care of you, so let me,” he said. He touched his forehead to hers and held her to him before kissing her again. This time, she took the bills he folded in her hand and stepped away.
“Thank you, Neil,” she said. She started down the stairs, but he stopped her.
“What do you need to get?” he asked.
She swallowed and stared back. She couldn’t lie to him, but she also couldn’t bring herself to tell him she needed a pregnancy test. At the same time, she didn’t know why she couldn’t say anything.
He must have suspected, as he inclined his head and gave her a look as if he knew she was hiding something. “Candy…” he said, starting down the stairs.
She looked down and back up at him. “I need a pregnancy test,” she said.
Chapter 12
Not only did Emily not take her to the store, but Neil had taken the truck keys and said he was driving Candy there himself. Emily appeared spooked for a minute until Candy filled her in on having told Neil about the pregnancy test, and Emily had slid her coat off, offered Candy a sympathetic smile, patted her arm, and said, “You’re marrying a Friessen man, honey. You better get used to how they step in and take over everything.” She’d then walked away, calling out to Brad as she went up the stairs.
The small drug store in Hoquiam was open late, and the shelf contained a dozen different brands of pregnancy tests alone. “What’s with all the different tests? Geez, and look at the prices,” Candy said.
“Stop worrying about the price, will you?” Neil said as he grabbed one box after another from the shelf. Holding six in his hand, he turned the pink one over and started reading. “So why didn’t you want to tell me?” he asked, flicking her a difficult gaze.
“Tell you what?” she said. For a moment, she had blanked, and he frowned. She realized he meant being pregnant. “Oh, I don’t know. I…” She lowered her gaze, and he immediately put a finger under her chin and lifted it so she had no choice but to look at him.
“Come on, Candy. This is me. Don’t hide anything from me. You should be able to tell me anything,” he said. Neil had these tiny lines around the edges of his eyes, and they added to his mystery, making a man who was far too good looking even more so.
“I don’t even know if I am. I’ve never been regular. I just feel…” She stopped, and he didn’t interrupt, but she could tell he was listening with everything he had. “I don’t want to disappoint you, and I sometimes feel as if this is too much. You want kids so badly, and I’m terrified. I saw how you are with your brother’s kids, and I can’t do that. I can’t just step in and be like you are with them. Something must be wrong with me,” she said. She wondered whether he’d walk away, now that she’d said it.
Instead, he allowed a slow smile to spread across his tanned face. “You could never disappoint me, Candy. Give yourself a break, too. It’ll be different with our kids. You’re going to be a wonderful mother. I know it.” He held up the handful of pregnancy tests and said, “Well, let’s go pay for these and give them a try.”
“Neil, I don’t think we need six. You’re wasting money. One will do,” she said, still reeling from what he’d said. She didn’t share his confidence and could feel an overwhelming panic choking her as he led her up to the cash register and the overweight young man who was sorting scratch and win lottery tickets.
He set all six boxes on the counter. “Who kno
ws which one’s the best? Besides, it won’t hurt to use them all,” he said.
The guy behind the counter didn’t look at their faces as he rang up the amount and gave Neil the total. Candy reached in her purse for the money Neil had given her, but he shook his head and tossed some bills on the counter. He took the bag and her hand and led her out into the cold, damp night, where he helped her inside the truck.
****
Neil was enjoying being back in this part of the country. As he drove the darkened highway back to Brad’s with a very quiet Candy beside him, he noticed how tense she was. “Candy, are you worried about being pregnant? I know we haven’t talked about this, but I thought you wanted kids.”
She turned her head toward the window, touched her lip with her fingers, and then faced him. “I don’t understand how I’m feeling. I love you, but I’m afraid that you’re going to wake up and realize I’m not cut out for your world and that you made a mistake. I don’t know how I’m going to be with kids. I thought I wanted them, but I’m scared. What if I’m a horrible mother?”
He reached his hand across the seat and linked it with hers. “You’re going to be fine. Why don’t we take it one step at a time? You get to pee on a stick first, find out if you’re pregnant, and then let’s just enjoy this time. Candy, would you stop putting yourself down? You’re who I want.”
She didn’t let go of his hand, but he had a feeling, when she looked away again, that she didn’t quite believe him. It had to be the hormones. He knew quite well, with his brothers, how Emily and Diana had been when they were pregnant. He would support Candy, waiting on her, pampering her while she grew large with his child, and she’d know how much he loved her. She was going to be an amazing mother.
It didn’t take long to get back to Brad’s. Neil held Candy’s door open and helped her down. The bag in his hand, he walked her up the steps and opened the door for her. Brad and Emily were sitting in the living room when Neil shut the door. Emily glanced up from where she sat beside Brad, snuggled on the couch.
“Hey, you two,” Brad said, keeping his arm around Emily when she tried to scoot off from where he was cuddling her. He wore a big grin as he glanced at the plastic bag Neil carried.
Candy toed off her sandals and stood in her bare feet. Neil realized he needed to get her some warmer clothes. Tomorrow, he’d take her shopping, maybe drive up the peninsula, take her into Olympia for the day. Neil handed Candy the bag, and she snatched it. He didn’t miss the hint of color climbing her cheeks.
“Be up in a minute, honey,” he said, watching as she hurried up the steps and noticing how quiet she was.
“So…” Emily started to say, her blue eyes flashing with a teasing spark.
“So nothing,” Neil said. “We just picked up a few pregnancy tests. We’ll see. Guess it’s good that the wedding is this weekend. So, tell me, what about the minister? Is he booked? I guess I need to get a hold of the caterers, flowers, a band…”
Brad cut Neil off as he walked to the easy chair across from them. “Whoa, boy. How many people do you think are coming? When we talked on the phone, you said just family.”
Emily patted Brad’s shoulder. “You know this is your brother’s wedding, and Candy’s. It should be nice. Just remember, Neil, this house is only so big, and this time of year, with the weather… it’s hard to plan something outdoors,” she said, sliding her legs around. “I called the minister. He’s booked in. There’s a caterer, a local lady. She’s really good, and you and Candy can talk to her tomorrow. For the flowers, you two just need to pick colors. Brad already has someone in Olympia coming out to decorate and set everything up in the house. It’ll be in the living room, and we’ll set up a buffet in the dining room. Oh, and did Candy get a dress?” Emily asked.
“No, she didn’t. We’ll take care of it tomorrow when I take her shopping. Olympia has some wedding stores, right?” Neil asked.
Emily slipped out of Brad’s arms and wandered into his office. She returned a few minutes later with a card and handed it to Neil. “Call this lady, Veronica Tanner. She’s a wedding consultant, and she’ll handle everything you need. When I spoke with her, she was a little freaked out when I mentioned a wedding this weekend, but she’s flexible, and she said it would be possible to pull it off if it’s small. She can put you in touch with designers, too, and someone to make your wedding cake.”
Neil looked at the pink and white card with the name of the wedding consultant and decided to let her handle everything, just like a good secretary would. “I’ll call her in the morning,” he said. He stuck the card in his shirt pocket and then glanced up the stairs. “I’m going to head up, see what my fiancée is doing. I’ll see you two in the morning.”
They said goodnight, and Neil hurried upstairs. The bathroom door was open, and the light was off. He pushed open the bedroom door to see Candy perched on the edge of the bed, the pregnancy tests scattered beside her, still wearing her gray sweater.
“Did you take one?” He gestured to the boxes beside her.
She nodded. “Yeah,” she said, pointing to the dresser across the room. “Just waiting, but it also said it’s best to do it in the morning and wait two minutes for the results.”
She was gripping the mattress, and she had a look in her eyes that he hadn’t seen before. He wondered for a moment, by the way her face had tightened, if she was scared. “Has it been two minutes?” he asked, staring toward the dresser. The bed squeaked behind him.
“Yes,” she said. He turned to face her as he picked up the stick, and she was squeezing her hands together. “What does it say?” Her voice sounded dry and very scared.
He glanced at the stick, but he was at a loss. He’d never seen a pregnancy test before, as he’d never put himself in a position for an unplanned pregnancy. He used protection and made sure the ladies he was bedding also used it, except with Candy—because he wanted her pregnant. “What’s it supposed to say?” he asked.
She let out a sigh that sounded a lot like relief. “There’s supposed to be a plus sign in the center of the stick if I’m pregnant.”
“You mean like this?” he asked, holding up the stick with the bright pink plus sign, and he watched Candy’s eyes widen as she slapped her hand over her gasp.
Chapter 13
What a week it had been. Candy was in the kitchen, helping Emily clean up after dinner. They were expecting Jed and Diana and their two children, little Danny and the new baby, though for the life of her Candy couldn’t remember what the baby’s name was.
“So how are you feeling?” Emily asked, wiping down a spot on the counter.
If there was one thing Candy was tired of, it was everyone’s excitement over the baby she was carrying. Being pregnant was supposed to be the happiest time of her life, but she’d been in a state of shock since Neil had showed her the positive result on the stick four nights ago. She’d spent the next few days being dragged around by Neil to Olympia for shopping, meeting with a wedding coordinator, and being fitted for a wedding gown she hadn’t even picked out. Neil handled everything, including the sexy, long, white wedding dress that showed a generous amount of cleavage, with a low-cut back and satiny material that flowed in a mini train. The dress was stunning, and she felt like a princess, one that was on a glass pedestal, being showcased to everyone in a way she absolutely hated. She’d said nothing.
When Neil ordered a five-tiered cake, she stared at him as if he’d lost his mind. Who did he think he was feeding? The caterer had come up with so many dishes, hors d’oeuvre, and fancy things to eat, some that she’d never heard of. There were mountains of flowers, and the music—good Lord, Neil had hired a local string group. He had even suggested that Emily stand up for Candy, and Diana, too, even though she’d never met her. Candy had said nothing and just let Neil handle it all. It was supposed to be a small wedding, but Neil had a weird idea of what a small family wedding was. This was posh, fancy, expensive, and she was terrified. She couldn’t help but feel as if Neil were mo
lding her into something she wasn’t.
Hell, she hadn’t even met Neil’s other brother Jed. Then there was his cousin, Andy, and his wife, who were coming as well. There were also a few local neighbors the Friessens had known forever, but there was no one for Candy.
“Candy, are you okay?” Emily asked. She leaned closer and touched her arm.
Candy fought the urge to cry, because Emily had been nothing but kind. She was a wonderful mother for her autistic son, who didn’t appear all that odd to Candy. “Emily, how do you do all this?” she asked as she set the dirty plates in the sink to be rinsed.
“Do what?” Emily asked, watching Candy with an amazing pair of blue eyes.
“You’re so calm, yet you have three kids, and your eldest has autism. He looks good, but how do you do this, handle all this?” She wondered if her voice had caught, and she looked away. Maybe she shouldn’t have said anything about Trevor.
“Trevor is actually from Brad’s first marriage,” Emily said. “It’s an unusual story. I was married before, too, and Katie is from my first. When I set out on my own, Brad hired me to look after Trevor and the house. That was how we met.”
Candy couldn’t have been more shocked if Emily had said she’d recently gone to the moon. Maybe something in her expression said that, as Emily shrugged awkwardly.
“It is what it is, Candy. We fell in love, but it wasn’t an easy road. I figured out Trevor had autism, and the hardest thing was telling Brad. Oh, he was devastated, but eventually he got him diagnosed and started therapy. He’s doing so good now. You should have seen him before. He couldn’t do anything, would scream and carry on. I couldn’t take him out because I didn’t know what he’d do. He’d jump on people who came to the house, he’d write on the walls… It was awful, but look at him now.” Emily glanced over her shoulder at Trevor, who slipped into the kitchen, carrying his empty dessert plate.
The Wedding Page 4