“I’m so glad you came!” the redhead gushed. “Why don’t you let Benjamin join Zachary in the pool and I’ll introduce you to everyone.”
Benjamin tugged on her hand. “Can I, Mama? Please?”
“All right. But remember what I said.”
He smiled widely and then scampered off.
Autumn led her straight into the thick of things. She recognized Connor, and Autumn introduced her to his mate, Aislinn. Then she met Ramsey and Harper, and their son, Rafe. By the time she’d met everyone at the gathering, her head was spinning, and she still hadn’t seen Sawyer. He’d insisted on picking her up this morning, but she’d told him she’d feel better having her own transportation, so he’d agreed to meet her here.
She tried to keep up with the conversation swirling around here, but it was obvious everyone was close and knew what was happening in each other’s lives. Winnie felt out of place and was starting to wish she hadn’t come, even if it did look like Benjamin was having a great time with his new friend. She escaped to the outer edge of the group and wondered if it would be possible to blend into the background.
A hand landed on her waist and she shrieked as she spun around. Sawyer grinned down at her before pressing a quick kiss to her lips. Her cheeks flamed at the thought that everyone might have seen him do it. She glanced toward the pool, but Benjamin wasn’t paying them any attention.
“I’m sorry I’m late,” Sawyer said. “I picked up the pool for my house last night and started putting it together this morning. I’ll still need to fill it later and add the chemicals. I hope it’s ready by Monday. He seems to swim like a fish.”
Winnie smiled. “He loves the water. Always has.”
“You should get something to eat. We always have so much food that people take leftovers home. I have no idea what the orange fluffy stuff is that Harper usually brings, but you really need to try it. It’s like whipped cream with oranges in it. And Autumn’s pigs in a blanket are awesome. Whatever she does to them, they are the best I’ve ever had. I think she flavors the little weenies before she wraps them, or something.”
“So, you have the inside scoop on all the best dishes here. You sound very much like a bachelor who doesn’t like to cook.”
He laughed. “Busted.”
They filled their plates and Sawyer found a place for them to sit. Cole, Marin, and their three-year-old, Emma, sat beside them. Winnie had to admit the little girl was adorable, and she wondered if she’d ever have more children. Benjamin hadn’t exactly been planned, but she was grateful for him every day. He was also her only pregnancy in the seven years she was with Paul. They used condoms most of the time, but they slipped up often enough that it made Winnie wonder if she could have more children.
“Winnie, Sawyer said you’re looking for work,” Marin said. “Do you have a particular type of job in mind?”
“One that pays the bills,” Winnie said. “I’m honestly not picky.”
“If you don’t mind me asking, what’s your educational background?” Marin asked. “I promise, I have a reason for being nosy.”
“I finished high school and went to college for a year before Benjamin was born. I had to drop out after that. Juggling a new baby, a part-time job, and school was just too much. I was only nineteen when I had him and not prepared for motherhood.”
Marin nodded. “Do you think you’d like working with children? And maybe with books?”
“I love both,” Winnie said with a smile. “Why do you ask?”
“The Ashton Grove Library is looking for someone to fill a full-time position. You would work at the circulation desk during most of the day, checking out books and checking them back in, but for an hour a day you’d serve as the Children’s Librarian and take care of story time, which usually includes a craft of some sort.”
“That sounds like an amazing job, but do you really think they would hire me?”
“I don’t see why not. You could use me as a reference if you want, and I’m sure Autumn would give you one too.”
Winnie nibbled her bottom lip.
Harper, Ramsey, and their baby moved to the chairs on the other side of them. She’d only met them briefly, but Harper had been very welcoming. Her mate, not so much. He’d been introduced as the pack enforcer, and she supposed it was part of his job to be leery of anyone getting close to the pack. He made her a little nervous.
“If you think you’d like the job, you should apply for it,” Sawyer said. “You could stop by Monday, on your way to my place.”
“But what about Benjamin? With school out for the summer, I don’t have anywhere to put him while I work. He can’t stay home by himself.”
“He can stay with me,” Harper said. “I’m keeping Zachary during the summer so they could play together at my place. We sometimes go on outings to the zoo, the park, or maybe a museum, but I would make sure you were okay with that before I took Benjamin anywhere.”
“Harper, maybe you shouldn’t…” Whatever Ramsey was going to say, his mate shut him up with one look. He shrugged and went back to eating.
“I can’t just dump my son on you,” Winnie said. “We just met, and it sounds like you have your hands full already. Dealing with a rambunctious boy and a baby can’t be easy.”
Harper smiled. “It’s not so bad. Zachary usually keeps busy. Ramsey added a sunroom onto our house last year, and I have a play area out there for Zachary. He has art supplies and some toys, along with a TV and DVD player. Not that I leave him to his own devices all day, but he has plenty to keep him occupied, and I’m sure he’d love having Benjamin there.”
It was tempting, a little too tempting. What happened if Benjamin broke something at her house? Or if Ramsey decided he didn’t want her son in his house? For whatever reason, he didn’t seem to like her very much. The last thing she wanted to do was put Benjamin in a situation that could be temporary, and then be unable to explain why he couldn’t go back.
“Just think about it,” Harper said. “You don’t have to decide right away. Apply for the job, if you think you want it, and then let me know if you need someone to watch Benjamin for an interview or for the summer. We can do a trial run, and then, after you get your first check, if you decide you’d rather put him in daycare, I would understand. Like you said, we really don’t know each other, but I have a good feeling about you, Winnie. Something tells me you’re going to be around for a while.”
Had Sawyer said something to them? Did everyone know that he wanted her to become his mate? She glanced at him, but he was watching Benjamin. It amazed her how much he looked after them, without even being asked to. It just seemed to come naturally to him, as if they were all part of the same puzzle and their pieces were finally snapped together. They did fit together rather well, and the more she was around him, the longer she wanted to stay by his side.
“I’ll let you know, and thank you for offering,” Winnie said.
Sawyer practically threw his plate before starting to strip his shirt over his head as he raced toward the pool. Before she could process what was happening, he dove into the deep end and a moment later came up with her son. Winnie gave a cry when she realized that Benjamin was too still. She went running toward them, falling to her knees as Sawyer leaned over the boy and performed CPR.
Winnie cried as she willed her sweet boy to live. His lips were turning blue, and she wondered if what had started as a beautiful day would end in tragedy. Losing Paul had been one thing, but if she lost Benjamin…
When Benjamin sputtered and coughed up a lungful of water, Winnie wiped the tears from her cheeks and held him close. Sawyer stayed by her side, dripping water from his jeans and boots, a haunted look in his eyes. He looked every bit as terrified as she’d felt the moment she realized Benjamin was drowning. She should have paid closer attention to him.
“I swear I was watching him,” Sawyer said. “He was there one minute and the next he was gone. I thought he was playing for a moment. If I hadn’t hesitated…”
He wrapped them in his arms and held them tightly. Sawyer buried his face in the crook of her neck. Gabriel came over and knelt beside them, a hand on both of their shoulders.
“Why don’t you take him inside and get him dried off,” he suggested. “Sawyer, you can borrow some of my clothes.”
“If it’s all right,” Winnie said, “I think we’d better leave. Benjamin has had enough excitement for the day.”
Gabriel nodded. “I’m sorry we didn’t notice him before Sawyer did. I hope it won’t stop you from coming back again.”
“Thank you for having us over today.” Winnie stood and tried to pick up Benjamin, but he was clinging to Sawyer. The wolf lifted him with ease then took her hand, leading her out to the curb where she’d parked.
Sawyer buckled Benjamin into the car then leaned his hip against the door as he faced Winnie. She saw indecision in his eyes and a bit of fear. But fear of what? Almost losing Benjamin? Her heart was still racing, and she wasn’t certain she wanted him near anything deeper than a bathtub anytime soon, but she knew that wasn’t realistic. Her little boy loved water, and would probably want to swim again soon. He’d bounce back faster than she would over the incident.
“You taking him home?” Sawyer asked.
“Yeah, I think that’s best. He needs a bath and then maybe some quiet time.”
Sawyer nodded. “Will I still see you Monday?”
“I…I don’t know, Sawyer. I’m not sure Benjamin needs to swim again so soon, not after…” She glanced toward the backyard and shivered. “I just think we need a little time.”
“Please, don’t shut me out.”
She looked up and realized the wolf looked close to tears. It surprised and humbled her that he would show that side of himself to her. Sawyer was far more manly than Paul could have ever hoped to be, and yet, he was almost crying over the thought of losing them. She reached up and placed her hand on his cheek, wanting to give him comfort, and yet not quite sure what she could promise him. She didn’t blame him for what happened to Benjamin. She blamed herself. For once in her life, her focus had been on herself, and not her child, much like it had been the day he’d gotten lost at the apartment.
“Just give me a few days to sort things out and then I’ll call, okay?” she said.
“All right.” He backed up and gave her space to walk away.
It was the hardest thing she ever had to do, and watching him in the rearview mirror, as she pulled away, was even harder. He looked like he’d just lost everything. And for some reason, she felt the same way. It was insane. They hardly knew one another, and yet, she felt closer to Sawyer than she’d ever felt to Paul. Maybe it was because he was older than her, or maybe it was all those muscles, but he made her feel safe and cared for. Paul had made her feel like an inconvenience.
So, why wasn’t she jumping into Sawyer’s arms and begging him to let her stay?
Winnie didn’t know what the next few days would bring, but she did know one thing. Her son was a priority. She’d nearly lost him today. Being around Sawyer was amazing, but he took her focus off her son, and she wasn’t sure she was ready for that. What would happen the next time she wasn’t paying attention?
“Mama,” Benjamin said.
“What, baby?”
“You made Sawyer sad.”
“I know, baby. I know. But right now, Mama needs to focus on you, okay?”
“Mama?”
“Yes, baby?”
“Sawyer saved my life. Just like he saved us from sleeping in the car the other night. That makes him a good guy, doesn’t it? Maybe even a hero?”
Her throat was tight with emotion. “Yeah, I guess it does.”
“You shouldn’t make a hero cry, Mama.”
A tear slipped down her cheek as she realized that her small son saw far more than she’d ever realized, and understood more than she gave him credit for.
“We’ll call him after we get you bathed and into some dry clothes, okay? I promise, we won’t let him be sad for long.”
“I know what would make him happy again.”
“What’s that?”
“Being my daddy.”
Winnie couldn’t have held back her tears if she tried.
As soon as she took care of her sweet boy, she could think about Sawyer and determine where, if anywhere, things were going for them. She knew he cared about her, about them, but her infatuation with the wolf had almost cost her son his life. Could she be selfish enough to go after what she wanted if it meant taking her attention away from Benjamin?
Chapter Seven
Ramsey stood by Sawyer in the middle of the road. “Are you going after them?”
“She wants space,” Sawyer said, his chest aching as if someone had punched through it and removed his heart. He’d seen the look in her eyes, and he was certain that he’d just lost her.
“I may not be one hundred percent certain that she’s as innocent as she seems, but I can see that you care about her. If you’re certain you want her for your mate, you shouldn’t wait for her to come to you.”
“Worried she won’t?”
Ramsey shrugged. “That woman just had the hell scared out of her. She almost lost her child, and it happened at a pack gathering. She probably thinks if she gave us a wide berth, then her family would be safe.”
Sawyer didn’t like the idea, but Ramsey was probably right. He was fairly certain she would stay in the apartment, even if she didn’t want anything more to do with him. She’d do what was right for her son, and that meant keeping a roof over his head. But it wasn’t just the thought of never seeing her again that worried him. Benjamin had nearly died by drowning. The poor kid was probably going to have nightmares.
“I don’t like feeling helpless,” he admitted to Ramsey. “What did you do when you knew Harper was the one?”
“Fucked it up. I had shit going on with Luna, and that bat shit crazy woman tried to claim I’d gotten her pregnant. I thought I was going to lose Harper, but I managed to convince her that I hadn’t touched the crazy rabbit shifter.”
“Do you have any regrets?”
“Only that it took me so long to claim her. She’s one in a million, and I can’t imagine my life without her. If you feel that way about Winnie, forget that you’ve only known each other a few days and go after what you want. Sometimes, the beast just knows. Don’t fight your instincts.”
Sawyer smiled a little. “If I went with my instincts, I’d have thrown her over my shoulder and carried her off to bed by now. Not an easy thing to do with a five-year-old under foot, but I love that kid.”
“So, the question is, are you going to fight for what you want?”
“Winnie isn’t like Harper. If I chase her, she’s going to run faster. I think your mate wanted to be caught, but Winnie has been independent for too long to give in. She’s fought hard to keep her son safe and fed. She might have let me help her get her feet back under her, but she’s not ready to trust enough to be mine. And what happened today is going to have her running scared. She blames herself for what happened, and in part, probably blames me for distracting her.”
Ramsey shook his head. “I don’t envy you. Whatever path you decide to take, you know the pack is behind you. I might not trust her, but if she’s what you want, you have my support.”
“Thanks. I think I need to figure some shit out. Let everyone know I’ve gone home?”
Ramsey nodded. “Call if you need anything.”
Sawyer gave him a salute and walked off to his truck parked across the street. Going home to an empty house wasn’t all that appealing, but maybe working on the place would help him get things into perspective. He didn’t have the first clue how to reach Winnie now. The scared look in her eyes, that look of failure, was something she’d have to work through on her own. He had no doubt, if he showed up on her doorstep right now, the door was slammed in his face.
Idiot. Did you think after one kiss she’d be yours?
He’d tried to take things slow, to give her time. Now he was wondering if he shouldn’t have let the wolf loose. Maybe if he’d claimed her, he’d be by her side right now, helping her through this, instead of wondering if he’d ever see her again.
What are you, a pansy or a wolf?
The beast inside whined for their mate.
Sawyer drove home and threw himself into the projects around the house. He worked until he exhausted himself, forced a sandwich down his throat, then went back to work. He worked all afternoon, through the night, and into the next morning. And still, she hadn’t called. Even though he hated to admit it, maybe she didn’t need him as much as he needed her. She’d been fine before he came along, and he knew that she would be fine without him. Winnie was a fighter, and one way or another, she would survive.
The question was, would he?
When he felt like he couldn’t remain upright another moment, he finally allowed himself to sleep, for a few hours at least, then he was back up and working on the house again. If Winnie did come back to him, he’d be prepared. Only an asshole would ask her to give up that nice apartment for a falling down house. And if she never came back…well, he’d deal with that when he had to. For now, the hope she might return was enough.
It was hard to fight his instincts. The beast inside wanted to go after their mate, claim her, and drag her home where she belonged. The more reasonable side of him knew that was the fastest way to lose her. He stared at his phone throughout the day, willing it to ring, and wondering if she’d answer if he called.
Sawyer worked for days on the house, ripping out carpets and putting in new flooring. He replaced the kitchen cabinets and started painting the inside. He poured all of his energy into the house, working until he couldn’t lift the brush anymore before resting a while and then starting over. And still, the phone never rang.
Moonlight Rescuer (Return of the Ashton Grove Werewolves Book 2) Page 5