“Me, either. But none of us wanted the alternative.”
I shuddered at the thought. Even after almost being attacked by her, I’d do it again rather than lose my mate. I couldn’t imagine a world with her not in it. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do or sacrifice to ensure my future with her. “I just wish she wasn’t having to go through all this.”
“I agree. But she’s strong, and she will survive this. We just need to hang in there and give her the room she needs to adjust.”
I gave Devlin a weary smile. “Have I mentioned you look like shit?”
He chuckled as he cocked his eyebrows. “I could say the same for you. I’m assuming the cage is still standing?”
I tentatively rubbed my ribs, the damage repaired from where I’d brutally slammed myself against the silver bars. “Not because I didn’t try to knock the damn thing down.” Silently I wondered how I hadn’t ripped it apart.
“Speaking of which,” Devlin said, a serious look falling over his features, “I think it might be best if we move Darcy down there.” When I opened my mouth to interrupt him, he held his hand up to stop me. “Hear me out. Yes, she’s alive; and yes, she’s talking. But you saw how quickly she lost control with you. Do you want to risk your pack if she manages to get free from her room?”
“But putting her in the cage? Is that really necessary?” My stomach sank at the thought.
“Call me overly cautious. It wouldn’t be forever. Just until we get the all-clear from Zane.”
“Let me make it a little more comfortable for her, then. A bed, at least,” I responded.
“Make it quick. I’ve compelled her to sleep, but her hunger is strong and she’ll rouse shortly. I don’t want this to be any more difficult on her than it has to be.” A nervous tic caused Devlin’s eye to twitch. There was no doubting his seriousness.
“Okay, give me about fifteen minutes. Daniel and I will get it set up and you can bring her down.” With something to do, I didn’t feel so helpless, and my weariness fled. With each passing second, Darcy would get better and better. I just wanted to hold her. To know, for myself, that she was safe.
Turning away to go find Daniel, Devlin stopped me. “She’ll return to us, Mason. Whatever happens, we’ll help her through it.”
“From your lips to God’s ears,” I whispered.
With no time to waste, we both focused on the tasks at hand. Whether I liked it or not, I needed to prepare a makeshift prison for my soul mate.
****
My heart was breaking, and this was only the beginning.
Moving Darcy hadn’t been the difficult part. It had been laying her gently on the cot and kissing her brow before closing and locking the barred door. I’d used the cage many times—for out of control pack members and, most recently, for myself. It turned my stomach that my beloved was its latest hostage. I wanted to howl in frustration, but Devlin was right. There was no guarantee that she was completely sane, in spite of her moments of lucidity. Until we got the green light from Zane, the cage would be her new home.
It was a necessary evil. One I hated with every part of me.
She hadn’t moved in the past hour and it took every bit of my willpower not to check to see if she was breathing. She’d briefly stirred earlier, a strangled snarl escaping her lips, as she tossed and turned before settling back down. Routinely I checked for the familiarity of our connection, but found nothing.
She was gone from my mind and my gut told me we might never get it back.
That was the kicker to all this. So many things had changed—life altering things—and I was scarcely holding it together for both of us. She needed me to be strong, to make the decisions if the worst-case scenario presented itself. I didn’t want to dwell on it. In fact, it was something I fought to keep blanketed under a healthy layer of thick denial. I didn’t want to know about the “what if’s”.
What if she wasn’t her?
What if she was more animal than her?
What if she . . .
Banging my head against the wall that had kept me propped up since I began my vigil, I scrambled to shut the defeated thoughts down. I wouldn’t be weak for her.
She needed me; and like air, I needed her to pull through this. I couldn’t keep breathing without her. She was it for me; and if anything happened to her, Daniel would have me locked back up in the cage before I could blink.
He’d tell me it was for my own safety and that of my Pack, but honestly . . . it would only be moments before I’d follow her. Morbid as it sounded, my heart beat for her. I really was that guy who, once I found my soul mate, allowed my world to shift and revolve solely around her. Sure, I had my duty as Alpha, but what good would I be if I were a shell? An empty shell?
A soft whimper filled the air, pulling my attention back to what was important. Things might seem dire, but this wasn’t the first time Darcy and I had faced the impossible. Hell, we’d both faced the Heart and Death without any memory of the other, and still we fought hard for our bond. The fact we’d both shared the same dream before meeting and had weathered the storm brought by Avery and Julian, I’d say this was a piece of cake.
Staring at the small form lying under her favorite blanket, I willed her to keep fighting and silently vowed to do the same.
No matter what, I would keep us together—even if it was by the very ends of my fingertips. Love wasn’t just some word to toss around as if it had no value. It wasn’t a mere sentiment attached to flowers or candy. It was that guttural instinct that drove one to the ends of the earth and beyond. It was power, and it would be the glue that held Darcy and me together, forever.
“Come back, sweetheart. Whatever you need to do, find your way back to me,” I whispered, tears forming in my eyes. I didn’t bother wiping them away when they quickly began falling down my cheeks. I wasn’t ashamed to show my emotions, something Darcy said she found endearing. She’d told me once how much she’d respected me because I didn’t try to hold back. I’d made the mistake of keeping my emotions bottled up once, after the death of my sister, Jasmine, and Darcy had quickly called me out on it. Since then, I’d worked hard to be an open book for her.
I wanted no barriers between us.
I held my breath when she stirred; hoping she’d heard me and would respond. I needed to hear her voice, see her smile and have her tell me she loved me. I had countless memories locked away in my mind of her laughing, of the way she teased me for being stubborn, and the way she tilted her head to the side while she studied me before asking me a question. She knew she had me wrapped around her finger.
Suddenly I was back to the memory of her hands around my throat as she leaned in with her fangs descended.
But that was not my Darcy.
Quickly standing, I was at the cage door, my hand at the lock. In one second I could be inside and she’d be in my arms. I didn’t care if it woke her and her hunger was triggered. She’d drink from me, get her fill, and we’d get through it.
Reason blasted through me and I stopped, knowing my needs paled in comparison to hers. As torturous as this was for me, she came first. Devlin said she needed time and I would give her just that. I’d give her forever.
“I love you,” I spoke quietly through the bars. I needed to do something, be active, prepare for when she woke up. Something to keep me from going crazy with all this waiting.
When I heard her voice, I thought I was hallucinating. “I love you, too.”
“Darcy?” The hope ringing in my voice filled me.
I couldn’t take my gaze from her as she slowly stretched, gradually sitting up and faced me. She looked exhausted, dark, heavy bags under her eyes. Normally, I’d tell her to get some rest and chide her for not taking better care of herself; but watching her moving about trumped everything. She was alive and breathing. Right now, that’s all that mattered.
“How long have I been in here?” She looked around, her brow furrowing as she tried to remember.
“I don’t know. I’ve kind
of lost track.”
“You’ve been here the whole time?” Carefully, she stood and walked toward me. We were so close now, the only thing between us were the silvered bars. Tentatively, she reached out and flinched as she touched the metal. “Looks like it still works.”
“Careful, don’t hurt yourself,” I warned, narrowly escaping burning myself as I tried to touch her. We were quite a pair.
She answered with a bitter sounding snort. “A bit late for that, don’t you think?” I wished I could wipe the sorrow from her eyes.
“We’ll get through this,” I answered, my body struggling not to hold her.
“Promise?” Her voice shook with her own doubt.
“Promise.” I tried to pour all my conviction into my answer and she smiled. “And, yeah. I’ve been here since Devlin brought you up from the room.”
“Mason,” she softly chastised, sounding more like herself with each passing breath.
“Where else would I be, sweetheart, but by your side?” Ignoring the burn as my skin came in contact with the silver, I stuck my hand through so I could cup the side of her face. It felt like heaven to finally make that connection. Something within me clicked, like feeling her flesh proved we really were going to make it.
“I’m worried.” She didn’t flinch; and instead, leaned in, placing her hand over mine.
“Me, too.”
“I feel . . . different.”
“I bet you do. But you’ll get used to it. Once we get your hunger under control, you’ll be able to explore your new abilities.” A spark of interest flared in her eyes at the mention of that.
Prior to our decision to turn Darcy, Devlin had shared that becoming vampire came with certain perks. Each newborn was graced with new gifts and powers, depending on their personality and nature. Both of us were curious to see what that meant for Darcy.
“What if I never get it under control? Mason, I’m so hungry.” She drew the word out forcibly and tightened her grip on my hand. I didn’t pull back, not wanting to show fear. I had no doubt she’d be able to sense it if I did.
“You will. I have faith in you.”
“All I can think about is blood. How it tastes, the sound of it pumping through your veins, the way it feels sliding down my throat.” Still holding my hand, she paused long enough for me to look her in the eyes. “Mason, I think about drinking you. Your blood. How you’d feel inside me. Your power mixing with mine.”
I wanted to give it to her. Anything she wanted. If it meant opening the cage and letting her out so she could feed, I wouldn’t hesitate.
“You don’t want me hungry, do you?” Her voice was melodic and I found myself shaking my head. I didn’t want her to suffer. I wanted her to feel good.
“Mason, look at me.” A new voice broke through and Darcy snarled angrily, dropping my hand. Blinking, I realized what had happened and turned around to find Devlin behind me, looking concerned.
Darcy had compelled me. It hadn’t been strong, but it had enough power that she’d almost convinced me to release her. “Well, I think it’s safe to say compulsion is one of her new abilities,” I said, carefully drawing my hand back through the bars.
“You think?” Striding forward, Devlin clasped my shoulder and dragged me backward, creating more distance between me and the cage. “I’m glad I got here when I did.”
“Sorry, I didn’t think. I was just glad she was talking and lucid.” Casting a glance at Darcy, she’d returned to sit on the bed, glaring at both of us. It was like night and day—one minute she looked at me with love and the next like I was dinner. “Damn, this is going to take some getting used to.”
“It won’t be much longer. She’s getting better with each feed, and soon she’ll be more like herself. In fact, it’s promising that she’s awake and you guys talked. Just give it some more time.” I had no other choice but to believe Devlin. He’d gone through the change himself. If he said it was going to be okay, then it was.
“Can we quit with the touchy feely crap, please?” Darcy interrupted. “I’m hungry.” There was a hard edge to her tone.
“I think that’s my cue to take a break,” I answered, barely acknowledging Devlin’s nod as he watched me retreat from the room.
As I closed the door behind me, I sent up a quick heartfelt plea to whoever was listening.
I didn’t care how or by whom, but I needed time to hurry up.
I wanted things back to the way they were. Or at least as close as possible.
Chapter Four
Darcy
The person at the door wasn’t who I was expecting.
“Hey, Darcy,” Vlad said, waving awkwardly before sliding his hands in his pockets. I almost didn’t recognize him because he wasn’t wearing some kind of crazy outfit. His blonde hair wasn’t caked with gel and his face was cleanly scrubbed.
He looked normal in his blue jeans and button up shirt—a far cry from the variety of famous vampires he liked to mimic.
“Hey,” I answered, my eyes wide as I took it all in. “You look . . .”
“Different? Yeah, this is me.” He spread his hands out, a sheepish expression crossing his features.
“No offense, but I like this much better than your other costumes.” I didn’t know what else to call them. I’d always felt Vlad hid behind playing dress up, masking his insecurity with his clothing.
“Really? Devlin says the same thing.” He looked down at his chest, his fingers smoothly running over the blue plaid pattern. “Maybe I should start listening to him.” A smile curled his lips as he peered up at me. “Or not.”
I burst into laughter. The bantering between the two had become legendary. I knew Vlad infuriated Devlin; and his response just now told me Vlad recognized and encouraged it. There had been times I thought Devlin wanted to kill his nephew, but family was family. You don’t always get to choose them.
“So . . .” I drawled out, not sure why he was here and under the assumption I was limited as far as who could come visit me while under house arrest and confined in this cage. Not once had Mason or Devlin mentioned Vlad coming, so this made me curious.
“I wanted to see you,” he answered, moving away from the door and walking around the small room. “Wow, they really did lock you up. I overhead Devlin talking to Zane on the phone and thought he was kidding. You really must be bad ass if they’ve done this.”
Vlad came up short in front of me, gingerly touching the silver bars. When his fingertips didn’t sizzle, he almost looked disappointed.
“Silver only hurts werewolves. Sorry, wrong species,” I informed him. To prove my point, I grazed a finger lightly over a bar and the air instantly filled with the scent of my burnt flesh. Holding it up, I shrugged. “See?”
“Damn.” He was clearly taken aback, staring even harder at me. “So you really are part wolf-part vampire?”
“Looks like it. I hold traits for both; and when Zane deems it safe for me to be released, we’ll see what else I’ve inherited.” When Vlad simply nodded, not asking any more questions, my impatience got the better of me. “Does Devlin know you’re here?”
He snorted. “Devlin’s not the boss of me.” For all the false bravado he spoke with, it didn’t stop Vlad casting a quick glance over his shoulder at the door. It confirmed my suspicion. He was here on his own accord.
“So, you just decided to come say hello?” I prodded, trying to discover the answer.
“That; and I wanted to see if you were okay. Believe me, I know that conversion isn’t all sunshine, rainbows, and unicorns.”
It was my turn to snort loudly. “You don’t say. It’s a little more brutal than that.” I flinched at the memories of the pain that had wracked my body. Those hours seemed endless, drowning me in such bitter hopelessness that I’d begged for death. There was no adequate comparison to the agony or the way I’d almost lost myself in the process.
“I thought it would be,” Vlad whispered, bringing me back to the present. “I foolishly thought that it would be
a simple matter of being bitten and voila . . . a new and improved life.”
“No one explained how dangerous it would be? You really had no idea?” I couldn’t imagine being that clueless. Devlin had made a point of sharing everything about what he was going to do. Other than survival statistics, he’d held nothing back from me.
“I was determined to become a vampire and escape the pitiful existence of my human life. I didn’t want to be talked out of it, or lose my courage. I found the first vampire I could and made it happen. Even before it was half way completed, the jerk abandoned me. I was in the throes of converting when Devlin showed up. If it hadn’t been for him, I would’ve died. I was naïve, painfully gullible when it came to all things supernatural. He had to finish what the other vampire had failed to complete. I owe our uncle my life.”
I was speechless. I knew Devlin had helped Vlad, but this broke my heart for him. Beneath the cool façade, the clothes and fake confidence, my cousin had a tender nature. I hadn’t known him when he was human; but judging from the brief glimpses he gave me through stories, he’d felt like he was a no one. I could see how him thinking that changing who he was, in such a drastic way, could give him a new sense of self. It was his chance to reinvent himself into someone people would take seriously and respect.
Unfortunately, it wasn’t working out the way he’d initially planned. Vlad may have been older than me, but he hadn’t yet discovered that he was enough, just as he was. He didn’t need fake pretenses to impress others and make friends. If he would stop pretending and let the world see the sweet guy who’d snuck in to visit me, even at the risk of facing Devlin and Mason’s anger, I knew he wouldn’t have near as many issues.
I’d tried talking to him several times, encouraging him to be himself. He hadn’t been ready to listen. His normal appearance, today, gave me hope, however.
“I appreciate you coming to check on me,” I smiled.
“I consider us friends, Darcy, as well as family. Of course, I’d come. Even if it means they’ll be pissed off.” He nodded his head toward the door. “I had to see for myself and ask if there’s anything I can help you with.”
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