by Helena Smith
CHAPTER 29
Chris Robson laid on the soft green undergrowth with a tree canopy over his head. Bob Mitchell was on stag for the next two hours, and it was Chris’s turn to get his head down and try and get some kip. Which is easier said than done when you lying in the middle of the jungle. Chris replayed in his head how he had managed to get into this line of work. He joined the Para’s at an early age, and showed exemplary skills. The only thing that was a draw back was leaving his girlfriend. He loved her, so much. But he was young and it was what he had always wanted to do. It was not just a dream, this was his obsession. When he confessed one night that he had joined up, it took all of his courage to tell her.
She told him that she understood, but it was pointless in carrying on the relationship. He was gutted, and felt heartbroken. He never even so much as looked at another girl for the first few years in the Para. To the point where his mates in the Para’s started ripping him that he better not be a gay boy. So one night when they had come back from doing a stint in Northern Ireland they all went out on the lash. He broke his abstinence and took a girl back to her house and did the dirty deed. She wasn’t even all that, but it shut the lads up and he was never called a ‘gay boy’ again. His gaffa had hinted to him that if he played his cards right and kept himself knuckled down he could make it into the SAS. That was a dream for Chris, something he used to fantasise about. So he spent 2 years learning his trade and being the best in every area.
He went on to do the selection trial for the SAS. Phase 1 was the Endurance test, and boy was that an endurance test. It takes place on the Brecon Beacons and Black Hills in South Wales and it takes weeks. Carrying 55lb bergen, trekking and navigating your way through the hills from hell. The weather is never friendly, if anything it turns as hostile as hell. It’s as if the hills know that you are being tested. Most people surrender, pass out, puke up. But I had trained long and hard for this, and it wasn’t easy, but I survived it. Phase 2 moves you into the Jungle, where you have to learn patrolling and survival techniques.
The Jungle, a mixture of humid surroundings, that are so humid its moist. Chris reminisced how he was constantly covered in moisture and had the blisters to prove it. Blistering heat can be bad enough, but when it is wet as well it can make life even more uncomfortable. The lads always knew that even taking their boots off to dry their soaking socks was a mare. It was getting the boot back onto a swollen foot that proved to be a task in itself.
If you manage to survive that stage then the next phase is escape & evasion followed by interrogation. You get talks from ex SAS on their experiences of escape and evasion. You then get let loose into the countryside with a pack of guys chasing you. If you get caught you are interrogated and a mock capture takes place. If you do manage to evade the guys that are chasing you and survive 3 days, when you finally do get in they capture you anyway. There is no escaping the interrogation. They need to know that if you are in a hostile environment and you are captured, that you will keep your gob shut no matter what they do. In that mock up scenario they strip you naked and put you in stress positions. Making you kneel on the floor holding your hands outstretched either side of you. If you move, they will roughly put you back in the same position.
They will send female officers in to laugh at the size of your cock, they will have male officers dressed as a terrorist would, screaming in your face. Many hours later, no one ever knows how long you’re in there for, they drag you into a chair for questioning. You must only ever answer with the so called ‘big 4’. Name, rank, serial number and date of birth. They will ask you other questions, and you can only answer ‘I’m sorry but I cannot answer that question’. If you say anything other than this, then you have failed the course. It’s over. In reality, if you get caught they are more likely to do more than put you in a stress position. More likely to yank your teeth out using rusty pliers, then your toenails. Then they would be likely to hook your balls up to a battery pack. Everyone knew that getting captured would be no walk in the park. Anyone would take their hats off to the poor bastards that ever had to endure that shit. So, they made sure they were the best they could be to avoid this scenario.
He spent years in the SAS, and toured around the world on different missions. Lost many friends in the process, nearly got captured in Afghanistan, and skipped across women. Some he managed to have a few months relationship with, some lasted a night. He couldn’t be arsed and they didn’t understand he would have to disappear all the time. Of course it wasn’t something he could admit to being, a Regiment bloke. It wasn’t something you shout about.
There were always women in Hereford near the Reg base, and he could have as many one night stands to relieve the tension. But none of them ever came close to her, his one true love. For many years he had replayed their goodbye, and hoped that one day they would get back together again. But now, she was probably settled down in a lovely house with kids and hopefully a husband that deserves her. I hope he treats her right, if he doesn’t..... well he would go missing. Chris would see to that.
‘Eddie, you lazy dickhead... time to swap’ The words came through on his earpiece. He replied with ‘Alright Nob, let me get my gear and have a piss.’ It was quite typical for all of the lads to insult each other and not use their proper names.
Chris relieved himself a few trees down, before going back to collect his bergen. He had packed it before he had a snooze, as it was good practice. Always be ready to leg it. His food had no wrappers, it was all packed in sealable bags. You don’t want to leave signs that you were ever here. Christ, they even shit in a sealable bag, Chris amused himself remembering his horror when he learned of this. But again, if they were ever tracked, it makes it easier for you to disappear. He had tracked people himself and it made his life a lot easier when they were sloppy. Leaving rubbish nearby, or human faeces made it all the more quicker to find them.
He slipped the bergen onto his back grabbed his rifle and army crawled from the safe point where he and Nob head were using to get their heads down, up the slope. Through the thick overgrowth, the heat was stifling and he had managed to attract a few insect bites. He got to the vantage point, and whispered to Bob. ‘Here mate’. Bob shuffled backwards out of the little watch point which they had covered with pieces of overgrowth. If anyone looked in this direction, they would never see them. They were too well camouflaged, to ever be seen. They had done this too many times, and were experts at using their surroundings to blend in. They were in Colombia, deep in the jungle. Each had the same equipment in case the worst happened, they could carry on with the mission. The mission always came first no matter what.
Chris shuffled his way forward into the camouflaged den, which was no bigger than the size of a coffin. He would stay there for 4 hours, watching and waiting. It was always easier to do this in a tag team. Chris had been on operations before where it was just him, for 2 weeks. Hard slog. You end up stiff, wet, miserable and not to mention the cramps. The cramps were shite, you couldn’t exactly stand up and yelp when you were spying on someone.
Once Chris was in his place, Bob went back to the snooze point. He would have crawled his way there so as not to be seen. Bob then updated Chris.
‘Right mate, I have seen two of the drug lords going in, that is on our target list, and the 6 guys we have never seen before have not returned back on my watch. Think they have fucked off, maybe they have a sixth sense that they will be a part of a light show. But the meeting has definitely not taken place yet. The 10 targets have not yet entered the house. I don’t think it will be far away though. Fuckin hope not anyway. Right... time for me to catch some sleep.’
‘Cheers Nob head. I will let you know. Hopefully the rest of the clan will join soon and we can light the fuckers up and get out of here.’
CHAPTER 30
I am woken up by knocking on my hotel door and it makes me jump. The daylight is not as bright as it was when I went to sleep, I wonder what time it is. I look at the clock and its 18:42. I a
m sweating from the nightmares. Oh... the terrible nightmares. Bang bang bang... the door. I get up and look through the peep hole. I must be seeing things...it looks like Robert. I put the chain on the door and open it, it is him and he smiles at me. Not a normal smile though, its a weary smile. I open the door and he embraces me, and pulls me into my chest. Kissing my head.
‘Oh Bella. I have been so worried about you. Worried about Ash.’
I look at him and realise I have to trust him. I do trust him. Why am I even doubting him?
I love this man and he loves me. He leans down and kisses me softly on the lips. This is definitely no time for passion. He pulls me into his chest.
‘Bella, are you ok, your heart is racing.’
‘I was asleep and having nightmares’
‘Tell me Bella.’
‘No. I can’t. It is bad enough going through them once before re living them to you’
I really can’t repeat them. They were too awful. Me being chased by a man but I can’t see his face. Then everyone around me was going missing the scene melting away, and there were smears of blood everywhere. I kept seeing flashes of Ash, her face was beaten and lifeless. It makes me shiver in horror... and with dread.I walk back into the room and Robert follows. He walks over to the bed and picks up the phone and orders room service for us both.
‘I’m not sure if I am hungry Robert.’
‘You look gaunt Bella, so you need to at least try to eat.’
‘Okay, I will try.’
I sit down on the couch and Robert joins me. Then he scoops me up into his arms and puts me in his lap. Cuddling me and holding me tight. I can feel the warmth of his skin, slight stubble on his chin scratches at the skin on my face. I nuzzle my head into the crooks of his neck. His scent makes me feel safe, as does his arms that he has tightly around my body.
‘Make all this go away Robert. I’ve never been so scared in all my life. I will do anything to get Ash back safe and sound.... anything’
‘Shhh baby... I know’ He rocks me back and forth and my tears have returned again.
‘Let it out Bella... that’s it.. let it all out’ I sob, hard. As my sobs subside, Robert tilts my head up and kisses me gently on the lips and brushed away my tear sodden hair from my face.
‘You want to kiss me, even though I look like this?’ I smile weakly at him.
‘I want to kiss you, no matter what.’
‘Even with tears and snot running down my face and red eyes. ‘
‘Even then Bella... even then’
I stand up and walk over to the bathroom, and blow my nose and wash my face. I look dreadful. I feel dreadful as well. There is a knock at the door and Robert goes, and it turns out to be our room service. His phone starts to ring and he takes the call.
‘Yes?’
‘Okay.... keep me posted.’
Its like the shortest phone call in history.
‘Robert I thought you wouldn’t be around for a few more days yet. Did you finish early?’
‘I had to finish early Bella, I wanted to be with you when all of this was going on.’
I feel like his sentence has confirmed to me even more that I trust him, I find it reassuring. I nod and he guides me over to the table and sits me down. Arranging my plate and cutlery, pouring my drink. He sits down and nods at me, encouraging me to eat like I am a 4 year old.
I pick my knife and fork up and start to eat, slowly. But I find it hard to swallow, having a constant lump in my throat.
‘David said that the Police were asking you questions about me Bella.’ It was more of a statement then a question. So I just reply with a simple ‘Yes’
‘What were they asking?’
‘They asked Emma if she had met you. They asked me how long we had been together, how well I knew you. Things like that. To be honest, at this point Robert, I can’t remember in exact detail as I have been asked so many questions in the past 24 hours by everyone.’ I refrain from saying that the detective said if I ever needed help I just had to call. It didn’t seem the time or the place. I was still trying to make sense of it in my own head.
‘Sorry... I know you have. They are only doing their job Bella. It’s important that they check everyone out that has been in contact with Ash.’
‘Yeah, that’s what I thought.’ I hadn’t though... but it was a good explanation. I am pleased the detective is checking out everyone. That’s a good thing, and it shows that they are doing everything they can. I take one more mouthful of food, but I really can’t stomach anymore. Its too much. I pour myself more wine instead though. I can see Robert is about to comment on my lack of appetite, but I think from the look I gave him he thought better of it.
Robert gets up and heads to the bathroom and I can hear the shower splashing. He comes through to me
‘Come on Bella, shower then bed.’ I stand up and go through with him. Feeling numb I don’t feel as though I can make any decision at the moment, even the simple ones like showering and eating. Robert gets undressed in front of me, and all I do is stand there and stare into his eyes. He walks over and takes off my top and my bra, then undoes my jeans and pulls them down and off my legs. He then pushes down my knickers and I step out of them. We both get into the shower. He starts to wash me, but this time there is no arousal there. This time its with gentle love rather than in a sexual way.
I am to numb for arousal right now, and it is clear that he is to. Washing me with tenderness and with care. Afterwards, we step out of the shower and he dries me off with a towel and wraps one around his waist. He walks me into the bedroom and slips my nightie over my head and pulls back the covers and eases me into the bed.
‘Thanks’ I mutter. He just smiles at me, with a caring smile and kisses me on my forehead.
Robert walks around the rooms and switches everything off, and I can hear him putting the chain and lock on the hotel door. He comes back through with a hot cocoa and puts the tv on very low. Drying himself off, he slips into the bed next to me with a mug of something and hands it to me.
‘Drink up Bella, it will help you sleep. ‘
I do as I am told, I just feel so tired, its chronic fatigue. I drink my cocoa, and slide further down into the bed. Robert pulls me into his arms and whispers.
‘I love you Miss Stone.’
‘Love you too Robert.’ But with that my eyes begin to shut. Everything goes dark.
CHAPTER 31
His clothes were damp, and the cramp was beginning to start in his feet. Flexing them back and forth, very slowly so he didn’t compromise their position. His elbows are planted firmly on the ground, and his neck is feeling the burn. The house that they were watching had motion sensors around the perimeters and a lookout tower. If they were seen at any moment, they were in the shit. Chris was watching intently through his special binoculars, that didn’t give off any reflection. So many people made that mistake when spying it was ridiculous. All it took was for the sun to be bright and bam. Game over. A few bullets in that vicinity, and you can kiss everything goodbye.
In this climate, it was always hot and humid so you were constantly covered in a layer of sweat. But the thing that pissed Chris off the most, and he is sure he wasn’t on his own, was the insects. When you came to places like Colombia the insects were not normal. Evil kind, that’s what they were. They didn’t look normal, they would be an abnormally big size for an insect and sometimes they were the brightest of colours. Shit camouflage. It was the bloody bites that he was always left with. They must like his blood or something, but it didn’t matter where in the world Chris was... he was eaten. He always put the stuff on, but rarely did it work. It’s like the little shits smelled fresh blood. The worst place was the jungle, hot, humid, and full of freaky animals and freaky insects. Working in the jungle was a hard slog. But, he had signed up for this. It’s what he did best.
Chris opened the flap on the side of his cargo pants and slowly pulled out a muesli bar. He mused while he ate that it was standard practice. A
lways rest, eat and drink regularly. You never know when you are about to go without all three, or for how long. It also kept you alert. Going on stag was always a shitty job. It was always sods law that you didn’t get what you needed quickly.... oh no... quite the opposite. It was always sods law that it was in a shitty environment, with shitty weather. Not only that, but what you needed would take a week, 2 weeks and sometimes... when it was really shite... a month. Being on stag was renowned for being utterly boring. But, it was imperative.
It always gave you too much time to think. You had nothing to do but lie there and watch and wait. Chris remember leaving the SAS, he had done a good stint, in fact... a great stint. But he was made to leave to become a deniable operative. Basically a law unto himself. If the Government, CIA, MI5 didn’t want anything bouncing back on their precious reputations, it was the likes of Chris and Bob that were hauled in. Given a black ops, another term used for a deniable operation. If it went tits up and you were caught... well... you were on your own. You never acted on behalf of anyone but your own. Chris remembered the day he was told that he would be doing it. He had excelled at being a Reg guy. For that, he was punished. One of his team members were captured and beheaded and it was streamed online for the world to watch. The other was killed before being captured, Elliot. Elliot was a tough bastard and he knew, the last place he wanted to go was with those guys... so instead he went out in a blaze of glory and sprayed them with bullets before they ripped into him. He was told that if he didn’t cooperate they would blame that on him and dismiss him from the regiment as a disgrace. He wouldn’t even be given the pension, left up shit creek without a paddle.