“No, actually, Feagan introduced us. Mr. Dickens was researching life in the rookeries, so he interviewed some of us. To hear him tell it, he put us in his stories, but I don’t see the similarities.”
“I’ve not read the tale. Perhaps I’ll hire someone to read it to me.”
“Reading still causes your head to ache?”
“Worse than ever. So how is Peter? Did you find a family for him?”
“No, actually, I’ve decided that he shall stay with me. I promised Nancy I’d take care of him. I’m going to keep that promise. He and I live in the orphanage presently, but I’m going to have a small cottage built on the land and we’ll reside there. He’ll be the son I shall never have.”
“Surely, Swindler will give you children.”
“I’m not going to marry Jim.”
“Has he not yet asked?”
“He’s not going to. He knows what the answer will be. I don’t love him in that manner. It would be very unfair to him.” She desperately wanted to reach out and hug him, hold him close. Instead she took a deep breath. “So how have you been?”
Finally he faced her, and she was able to gaze into those beautiful blue eyes that had haunted her dreams these many weeks.
“I was just standing here thinking about the morning of Catherine’s wedding and how easily you lifted my timepiece,” he said far too quietly.
“Oh, dear God, please don’t remember that. I don’t know why I did it. I’m so embarrassed—”
He touched his finger to her lips, silencing her plea that his memories of her be far more pleasant.
“You managed to do the same with my heart, didn’t you, Frannie? You stole it, and I didn’t even feel it happening.”
Tears burned her eyes and her chest ached with the raw emotion she saw reflected in his eyes. Her heart leaped with the possibility that something real and true could exist—did exist—between them. “Oh, Sterling, I—”
Before she could profess her love for him, he was again pressing his finger to her lips. “I thought if I kept my distance that somehow my heart would return to me.”
She shook her head. “As long as I have it, I’ll not give it back.”
“You must.”
He returned his gaze to the garden, and she thought she would shatter with the thought of losing him. Since he’d gone to the country, she’d never known such loneliness. Her dreams of helping orphans paled when compared with the dream of once again having him in her life. She wanted to be able to talk with him at any hour of the day or night. She wanted to envision new dreams and share them with him. She wanted to look across a room and see him watching her. She wanted to wake up next to him and fall asleep beside him.
“Sterling—”
“I’m going blind, Frannie.”
Frannie felt her heart stutter, her chest tighten into a painful knot.
“Right now, I can’t see you,” he said quietly. “Are you looking at the garden?”
“No, I’m looking at you.”
“Look at the garden.”
Only she didn’t want to. She wanted to look at him, but she did as he asked.
“Can you see me?” he asked.
“Out of the corner of my eye, yes.” She turned back to him, and discovered his gaze on her.
“I can see you now,” he said, a self-deprecating smile on his face. “But unlike you I can’t see out of the corner of my eye, or even much to the side for that matter. And when the shadows move in, I lose a great deal more than that.”
“What happened? Was it because of your encounter with Sykes?” She was horrified to think—
“No. This has been coming for some time. Do you remember my drawings of the willow tree?”
“Yes, and how you began to focus…only on the tree.”
“I’m not so artistically clever after all. When I was one and twenty, it occurred to me that I wasn’t drawing as much of the countryside as I once had, yet I was standing in the same place. I pulled out my previous drawings and began to compare. Side by side the difference was subtle, but when I compared the first with the last…I’m a bit ashamed to admit that my first reaction was raw fear.”
She reached up to touch his cheek, his hair, but would he welcome her? She lowered her hand. “I can hardly blame you for that. Have you seen a physician?”
“A dozen or more. In various towns across Great Britain, in various countries around the world. There is no hope for it. Eventually my vision will narrow down until it disappears completely.”
“When?”
“I don’t know. Could be years.”
“That’s the reason you went against your father’s wishes and took your tour of the world when you did.”
He nodded. “I don’t know how long my window of opportunity will remain open, as the window on my vision is slowly closing.”
“Does Catherine know?”
“No. I’m fairly certain my father carried the shame of my imperfection to his grave.”
“He couldn’t be ashamed of something over which you had no control.”
He shifted his gaze to the falling snow. “You’re wrong there. He actually told me that he wished his second son had lived while his first had died. I’ve never told Catherine. She adored our father, thought he was without fault. He adored her. I won’t steal those memories away from her.”
And he declared himself a man who saw only after his own desires?
“You told me that you thought you’d loved a woman, but she discovered your failings.”
“Angelina. I was courting her. She loved to dance. It’s very difficult to sweep a woman across the dance floor when my vision is as narrow as it is. She began to take offense because I wouldn’t dance. Finally I explained the reason—and she very quickly began to give her favor to another. As far as I know she told no one. For that I’m grateful.”
“She didn’t deserve you.”
He laughed harshly. “No woman does.”
“That’s not true.”
Facing her, he cradled her cheek. “The night we went after Sykes, I’d left you a letter because if I died I wanted you to know that you’d stolen my heart as easily as you did my timepiece. As I’ve walked over my estate these many weeks, I thought how very unfair it was to you not to know how very much I’d fallen in love with you.”
She placed her hand over his, turned her face into his palm and placed a kiss against its center. “Sterling, I love you, too, so very much.”
“And that, my darling, is why I won’t marry you. I won’t burden you with what I will become.”
“What nonsense! What you will become is a powerful duke, a loving husband, a wonderful example as a father—”
He pressed his thumb to her lips. “Frannie, you go into dangerous places searching for your orphans and I can’t even see if someone is about to attack you. The darkness, my sweet, is the enemy.”
“Then I’ll stop going into dangerous places.”
“In time you’d come to resent me.”
“I will not. I’ll hire someone to go where I can’t. There is no problem that you can envision for which I cannot find a solution.”
“You did not want to be part of the aristocracy.”
“Yet tonight I actually spoke to some of the ladies and they’re really quite nice. Nothing like they were as silly young girls.”
“If we attend balls, like this one tonight, I shall have to be content to watch you with other men, knowing I can never sweep you across the dance floor.”
“Don’t be absurd. Of course you can.”
“Are you not listening? With me leading, we shall always bump into people—”
“Then I shall lead.” She held her hand out toward him. “We can do this, Sterling.”
He lowered his gaze to her hand.
“I love you, Sterling, with all my heart.”
He lifted his gaze to hers. “So did Angelina.”
“No, she didn’t, because if she had, she’d have never given you up for so
mething as inconsequential as a dance. Let’s try it tonight and if it doesn’t work we’ll never dance again. I can live without a dance. I can’t live without you.”
He seemed to consider, then bowed. “Miss Darling, may I have the honor of the next waltz?”
She smiled. “The honor, Your Grace, is all mine.”
Sterling had been unprepared for the impact of seeing her again. Her hair was upswept, her gown was flattering, and she appeared completely comfortable in her surroundings. He suspected that not being able to dance wouldn’t matter to her, but still he wanted to give it a try.
The strains of the waltz began and he escorted her onto the dance floor.
“Simply keep your eyes on me,” she said.
“That won’t be difficult. You look ravishing tonight.”
“I had this dress made hoping you would be here. I wanted to catch your attention if you were.”
“You caught my attention at Catherine’s wedding, even though you were dressed in something plain.” It was odd letting her lead him, yet at the same time it seemed…right.
“My hair probably. I’ve never liked the shade.”
“I like it very much. You’re very good at leading.”
“I’m very good at the dodge.”
He studied her for a heartbeat. “The dodge?”
“It’s when you set up a situation to fleece someone of something. There are all kinds of dodges, but you usually have a partner. You have to learn to read the situation very quickly and to know what your partner is going to do. You never want to play a game where Luke and Jack are partners. They always know what the other is thinking. Anyway, dancing is like a dodge. You follow your partner or let your partner follow you.”
“I can see over your shoulders that there are a lot of people on this floor.”
She smiled brightly. “Yes, there are. And we’ve not bumped into a single one.”
“That’s about to change.”
She appeared startled when he came to an abrupt halt. He felt someone brush past him. Couples began to give them a wide berth. He dropped down to one knee and Frannie’s beautiful green eyes widened.
He was aware of people no longer circling around him. The music came to a stop and he could sense the anticipation in the room. He took her hand. “Miss Frannie Darling, will you honor me by becoming my wife, my duchess, my love?”
Hers was not the only gasp he heard, but hers was the only one that mattered. Tears filled her eyes. She nodded quickly, smiled radiantly. “Yes! Oh, yes!”
He rose to his feet, took her in his arms, and kissed her deeply.
Without her in his life, the past few months had been sheer torment. He’d traveled the world searching for something he couldn’t even identify. And tonight for the first time he realized what he had been looking for, what he’d always been searching for: the woman nestled within the circle of his arms.
Chapter 25
The following day, Sterling received a request for a meeting with Claybourne and arrived at Claybourne’s residence at the appointed hour. Within the library, he’d not expected to face Claybourne, Dodger, and Beckwith—his family’s solicitor. It seemed he worked for at least one of the gentlemen. Frannie was also in attendance, looking a bit frazzled.
“I assumed the purpose of this meeting was to warn me to be a good husband or else,” Sterling said, laconically. “I’m not certain a solicitor is in order.”
“We thought we needed to come to terms on the settlement,” Claybourne said.
“A settlement? Are you gentlemen thinking to provide a dowry? I assure you. One is not necessary. I have no problem with Frannie coming to me with nothing.”
“There. You see?” Frannie said. “I told you this was unnecessary.”
Claybourne sighed heavily. “It is necessary, Frannie, because you don’t go to him with nothing.”
“Wait a moment,” Dodger said, finally uncrossing his arms and relaxing his stance. “You think she comes to you with nothing?”
“Other than whatever pitiful salary you’ve been paying her to serve as your bookkeeper. I know she likes to do good works with it. Whatever the salary was, I shall match it with an allowance that she is free to do with as she pleases. We can put it in writing if you want. And if she hasn’t already, she’ll need to give notice that she’ll no longer be looking over your books.”
Frannie stepped forward and placed her hand on his arm. “Sterling, I’m not exactly paid to look over the books. They’re simply my responsibility.”
He glared at Dodger. “You bastard. All this time, you’ve been taking advantage—”
“No, Sterling.” She squeezed his arm until he was looking at her again. “The three of us are partners, in several ventures, actually. I look over the books because, well, they’re my books. Our books. I have a substantial amount of money.”
“Which will become yours once you marry her, unless we come to terms on the settlement,” Claybourne said.
“I’m recommending that her current finances as well as any future monies she receives from the businesses be placed into a trust,” Beckwith said, “that she will oversee and manage.”
Sterling shrugged. “I have no problem with that recommendation. I’m not marrying her for her money.” He lifted her hand and pressed a kiss to her palm. “I’m marrying her because I love her.”
She gave him a beautiful smile. “In all fairness, you should probably know the amount.” She rose up on her toes and whispered a number that staggered him.
“Two million?” he rasped.
“Give or take a quid or two.”
“You do realize that if that had gotten around, there isn’t a lord in all of England who wouldn’t have offered for you.”
“That’s the reason we kept it quiet,” Dodger said. “Fewer fortune hunters that way.”
Sterling nodded. “Simply show me where to sign.” He winked at her. “Although I may not give you quite as much allowance as I’d planned.”
She wound her arms around his neck. “I’ll never stop loving you, I promise.”
He held her tight and whispered, “As long as I can, I’ll give you everything you desire.”
Dressed in a white gown, with orange blossoms wreathing her veil, Frannie sat in Luke’s open carriage as it transported them through London to the church where she was to be married. Catherine was traveling in a carriage ahead of them. Their son, born in the spring, remained at home with his nurse.
Frannie and Sterling had followed all the proper etiquette, waiting for June to arrive for their wedding to take place. No special license needed, nothing hastily arranged for them. No whisper of scandal. No child of theirs to arrive early, although if Frannie had her way, he would arrive nine months to the day after they were married. It had been absolute torture not to lie in the circle of Sterling’s arms these many months. She knew he’d suffered as well, and she suspected neither of them would sleep tonight.
“You look beautiful, Frannie,” Luke said.
She had no father to give her away, so he was doing the honors. It seemed oddly appropriate, even though he had been the first to ask for her hand in marriage. It was difficult to believe that the reason she’d given him for refusing was because she feared the loneliness of moving around in the world of the aristocracy.
“You look rather handsome yourself. A bit tired perhaps,” she teased.
“I awake every time my son does, bless him, and he’s not one for sleeping through the night.”
“I suspect in a few years his nightly doings will continue to keep you awake.”
“I fear you’re correct there. Catherine warns me that he has the look of a scoundrel about him.”
“Jack has told me that he’s not going to let his daughter out of the house until she’s forty.” Emily, named after his mother, had been born in the late spring, on the cusp of summer, and within a few moments of her birth, she’d effectively wrapped her father around her tiny finger.
Luke laughed. “God,
have you ever seen him so besotted? You’d think he thought he was the only man to ever have a daughter.”
She refrained on commenting that Luke acted as though he thought he was the only man to ever have a son.
“He’s letting all the girls at Dodger’s go,” Frannie said. “While he’s always paid them well enough that they didn’t need to earn coins on their back, he’s decided the expectation was there. They’re going to come to work at the orphanage, but he’ll still pay them their wages.”
“For a man who once cared for nothing except the next coin, he’s certainly spending freely these days.”
“He can well afford to. We can all afford to. We’ve had a good life, all in all.”
“You’ll hear no arguments from me there.”
But as good as her life had been, she was anticipating how much better, how much more enjoyable, it would be sharing it all with Sterling. Being with him every day and every night. Talking with him. Making love with him. Taking long walks, viewing the world through his eyes, learning how to help him see it through hers so when the time came, nothing would be diminished.
As they neared the church, she squeezed Luke’s hand and took a deep breath. So many carriages in the street and people standing around on the lawn.
“The church must be filled already,” Luke said.
The law didn’t allow for private church ceremonies. Even those who weren’t invited could attend if they wished. It seemed the wedding of a duke brought out a good many of the uninvited.
“You don’t have to do this, Frannie,” Luke said quietly. “We’ll just drive on. You can get married in the country.”
With tears in her eyes, she looked at him and smiled. “He’d invite the world if he could. It’s his way of confirming that he has no doubts that I’m the wife he wants. He’s a duke, Luke, and he has chosen me. I love him beyond all measure. I’d walk through hell for him.” She took a deep breath. “What are a few hundred people when compared with that?”
He held her close and said quietly, “It’s nothing at all.”
Partially hidden behind an elm, Feagan grinned his wicked grin. The elite always drew a crowd. His fingers ached to slip into nearby pockets, but he wrapped them tightly around his walking stick, leaned forward, and damned his rheumy eyes. He didn’t want to acknowledge that the dampness might have been brought on by the sight of Frannie confidently greeting people as she strolled beside Luke.
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