by Blue Kincaid
If only it were that simple.
He propped his head in his hand. “You’re fascinating. So you just…decide to trust people? How does that usually work out for you?”
December lifted her shoulder in a shrug. “Sometimes not so good. Sometimes it’s the exact right thing. I try not to judge whether trusting is a good thing solely based on the times that trust ends up being broken. I judge based on the times when it isn’t.”
“Do you trust me?”
“I do.” She gave him a teasing smile. “Do you trust me?”
But Harry couldn’t return that smile. “I’d like to.”
Her smile faded, though not in a bad way, more in a ‘Okay, serious topic, not joking anymore’ way. “Why?”
Harry let out a breath, shifting onto his back and staring up at the ceiling. December took it upon herself to slide over and press against his side, one long, slender leg across his. It’d been a long time since he’d had a woman cuddle up against him that way and, to be honest, he’d missed it. A lot.
“It’s part of why you’re even here. I don’t trust. Women…myself, especially.” He glanced to his right at her. “Not that I’m some misogynist asshole who thinks women are all jezebels or anything.” He sighed. He had to tell her. “I know you think… You probably think I’m mourning her. Katie.”
“Your fiancée. That was her name?”
His jaw tightened and he turned his gaze back up to the ceiling. “Yes. She died on her way to meet another man. Another Dom.”
He said it bluntly, matter of fact, no point in sugar coating the truth. He’d spent the whole last year of their life together sugar coating and making excuses and refusing to see the truth. Saying it out loud made it so real. It took his breath away. December didn’t say anything, but Harry didn’t think it really required a response, so he kept going.
“I never knew you could mourn someone you were so angry at. Before… Before, I’d have thought anger would probably help, somehow, make it hurt less?” Harry shook his head. “It doesn’t. It hurt more, I think. Because I didn’t lose just her.”
Harry suspected, as easily as she could read people, that he didn’t have to explain to December what he meant. He’d lost himself. His confidence as a Dom, as a man. Even his ability to trust. He had lost his fiancée to another man without ever knowing it – not until it no longer mattered, anyway.
“Harry…”
He shook his head again. “I’m not telling you to make you feel sorry for me, or to excuse my being an ass earlier. But you’re here to help and…this is what I need help with. So you had to know and now I’d really rather not talk about it anymore tonight.”
Silence reigned for a couple of minutes, tension strung taut between them, and then December shifted against his side, reaching down to tug the comforter up over them both. She didn’t say a word, cheek against his chest, and after a moment, Harry could feel the tension leech out of him. December pressed a kiss to his skin and he could feel the smile on her lips. It made him smile, too.
And so, for the first time in two years, Harry slept with a woman. Also for the first time in two years, he didn’t have any nightmares.
* * * * *
It’d been two days, and while December enjoyed spending time with Harry, she got the feeling he was stalling. Considering the issues he was trying to work through, that wasn’t surprising. But her job included making sure he stopped hiding and started being himself again. The Dom in him hadn’t disappeared, December could see him inside the quiet, closed off man she found herself rapidly growing very fond of.
Time to let that Dom out to play a little.
She could hear his keyboard clacking away behind the closed door of his office. He’d asked not to be disturbed, but December thought he very much needed some disturbing. All work and no play had made Harry a very dull boy for the past two years. No more.
December hurried quietly upstairs, rummaging through the dresser until she found her very favorite pair of tiny panties in satin the same color as her skin. At first glance they made it look as if she wore nothing until one looked closely. She hoped Harry intended to look very, very closely.
They came with a matching sheer little robe that hit just at the top of her thighs, edged in lace. It was completely indecent and she sincerely hoped she wouldn’t be wearing any of it for very long.
She thought about going barefoot, but nothing got a man’s attention like long legs, miles of bare skin and a pair of heels up to there. So she went to the closet and pulled out a pair of six-inch leopard print Louboutins. Not only did they make her legs look amazing every time she wore them, they had the added benefit of announcing her arrival. On Harry’s gorgeous hardwood floors, he’d have no choice but to hear her coming. And wonder. Imagine. Anticipate.
He’d be hard before she even opened the door.
However, she hadn’t anticipated the way every step, every firm snikt of her needle thin heels on the hardwood floor, would turn her on, too. She was very glad she’d decided to wear panties, because by the time she hit the halfway point on the stairs, said panties were damp with arousal.
If Harry had any idea how he affected her, in ways a client rarely did, December wasn’t sure if he’d be flattered or bothered. Did he want only the professional or would the fact that she responded to him on a much more personal level appeal to him, too? She didn’t know.
Maybe she’d get the chance to find out.
She didn’t hesitate when she reached his office door, turning the knob and letting herself in. Harry was waiting for her. She could tell by the way he hadn’t looked up when she walked in. He’d already been staring at the door, maybe holding his breath in anticipation. December had been.
Their eyes met as she approached the desk, coming around the side and easing one leg across his lap to straddle him, though she remained standing so there was only contact of thigh to thigh. Nothing more intimate. Yet.
God, he was handsome, sitting there staring up at her, ocean eyes intense and firm mouth seeming to silently beg for her kisses. It took a hell of a lot of willpower December hadn’t known she possessed to resist the lure of that mouth.
“You’re neglecting me, Harry.” She reached out to card her fingers through his hair, twining her fingers in the thick curls. Almost – but not quite – to the point of pulling on said curls. “I don’t like being ignored.”
Harry’s lips twitched slightly, his gaze whisking down over her and then back up to her eyes. “I was under the impression what I wanted carried the weight right now.”
December’s fingers tightened in his hair. “Is that what you thought? Besides, you wanted something when you brought me here. Burying your head in the sand to avoid whatever that is isn’t helping. So, by refusing to allow you to ignore me, I am actually giving you what you want. It just so happens I’ll get what I want, too.”
Harry’s hands came up to her wrists, closing on them and drawing her hands out of his hair. Such a shame. He had such beautiful hair. “What is it you want, December?”
She lowered herself onto his lap, shifting herself close against him so her panty covered pussy – damp with arousal – nestled snugly against the hard ridge of his cock. She’d never had a client – or any man, for that matter – refuse to even try to seduce her if given the opportunity. If he was trying to seem like a challenge, it was working.
“I want to serve you,” she breathed, hips shifting slowly, letting him feel the warmth of her through his pants and her panties. “I’m a submissive, Harry, your submissive. It’s cruel to refuse to allow me to serve you.”
Harry’s breath hitched and he swallowed visibly. “Well, I wouldn’t want to be cruel.”
Oh thank god. “Then tell me what you need, Sir. Just one thing if that’s all you’ll trust me with right now.” She’d take it, take anything. Anything but this standing still wondering why he’d brought her here if he had no intention of using her skills.
She really thought that was what it
came down to. Trust. But it had to start somewhere and he had to give her a chance. She held her breath, waiting, watching him, wondering if he’d refuse and push her away again.
Instead, Harry drew her closer and then released her wrists, arms sliding one around her back and one under her ass as he stood. She gasped, then grinned, peeling off the sheer robe and tossing it to some unknown corner as Harry carried her out of the office and up the stairs to the room he’d given her. She gasped as he tumbled her back on the massive bed and December focused one hundred percent on her Dominant. She wondered if he knew how much she belonged to him in that moment.
He was going to find out.
Chapter Four
God help him, she was the most beautiful thing Harry had ever laid eyes on. And she belonged to him.
Some would say referring to her as a ‘thing’ was misogynistic and sexist. But those people weren’t who mattered. December was. And something told him she would be immediately wet if she could hear his thoughts.
The idea of her wet made his cock twitch and while Harry might have lost his flow in the dungeon, he’d never lost it in the bedroom. His gaze dropped to her mouth. “December.” When he lifted his gaze, her expression had changed, to a very different sort of tension than earlier, this one erotic and sizzling with unspoken somethings.
“Yes?”
“You said you hadn’t decided if you were going to sleep with me or not.”
Her lips lifted slightly, and her teeth caught her lower lip. Fuck, he found that so insanely sexy. “I did say that.”
She intended to say yes. He could tell. So he didn’t rush the question, shifting closer to her, one hand reaching down to slip along her bare thigh and draw it up against his hip so his cock tucked more firmly against her heat. She wore nothing but a pair of barely there panties and, God in heaven, those fuck me heels. He had every intention of doing exactly that. Their eyes met once more. “Have you decided yet?”
Her answer was to wrap those long legs around him and kiss him stupid. And god damn, could the girl kiss. His hands splayed on her back, one between her shoulders, the other low down where his fingers could brush the sweet curve of her upper ass where her panties began. Panties he intended to remove as soon as he gained some motor function back from the kiss that was currently frying every synapse in his brain.
Her tongue was soft and wet, luring his out to play and damned if Harry tried to resist. His hand on her upper back sank into her hair, soft and a tangle of messy waves. When the kiss broke for a second and Harry dipped his head to nuzzle into the warm curve of her neck, he realized where the faint, delicious cinnamon scent came from.
He lifted his head, breath a series of broken pants. “Why do you smell like cinnamon?” he whispered, hand on her lower back slipping even lower to tuck her closer against him, the heat of her body enveloping him.
December blinked, for several long seconds not answering as she clearly tried to make her brain work properly. Harry’s pride swelled knowing he’d caused that. He’d done that to her and it woke all the primitive instincts a man in this day and age was supposed to have conquered. Fuck that. The only thing he wanted to conquer was her.
Finally, she processed the question and laughed softly, head tilting back as his nose went in for another nuzzle to breathe her in as he rocked his hips, nestled between her thighs. “Oh… My perfume… It’s just essential oils and…um…I don’t know. Organic stuff? I can’t think, stop talking.” Her hands sank into his hair and tugged his mouth up for another scorching kiss.
Absolutely. This was far more interesting than organic perfume. But he had a feeling cinnamon rolls and the like were going to give him inappropriately timed hard-ons for a very long time.
His hands slid down and swept her nothing panties down her thighs, abandoning them as she took over and drew her legs up to finish kicking them off. She kept the shoes on. Her legs spread easily and her knees clung to his hips, leaving nothing between them but his pants. Fuck, he had on too many clothes. And yet it seemed desperately little when confronted with the desire that had him in its grips. December wasn’t helping matters with the way she lifted her hips to grind against him, leaving the front of his pants damp and clinging to the hard ridge of his cock as he struggled out of his shirt. Good god help him, the woman sizzled like a wildfire in his hands.
The kiss broke and their eyes met, faces so close they breathed the same air as Harry slid his hand down between them and between her thighs, fingers spreading her open as he went. Her breath hitched and her lashes fluttered, a soft gasp escaping her. She might as well have touched him with a live wire. It sizzled through him. She sizzled through him.
His middle finger dipped lower along her slippery flesh and sank slowly, steadily into her. Harry never looked away from her face and watching the pleasure wash over her, the arousal, was incredible. He bent and nuzzled her soft, parted lips. “Reach over and turn the lamp on.”
He didn’t want to do this in the dark. No, December made a man want to set every light blazing so he didn’t miss a single nuance as he fucked her.
Again it took her a few heartbeats to respond and he waited. Then one hand snaked out and flipped the switch and Harry let out a low groan, pushing up onto one hand to look down at her as he lightly stroked his finger inside her. When she started to close her eyes, he shook his head firmly, finger stilling.
“Open your eyes, December. Look at me.” He wanted her eyes on him, wanted to see every reaction she had.
She whimpered softly, lashes lifting to meet his gaze. Harry loved that sound, so soft and vulnerable. A giving sort of sound. He rewarded her with a resumed slow stroke of his finger in and out, her body tight and slick, clenching around that digit.
“Do you trust me right now?” Maybe not completely, but she had to somewhat if she’d decided to stay and to have sex with him. Just to come to DC at all held a measure of trust.
“Yes.”
If he wanted to keep it, to earn the rest of her trust, that started now. Harry brushed his thumb across her clit, lips curving at the way she shuddered. “Put your hands on the headboard. Keep them there.”
Her eyes darkened and she bit her lip, breath quickening as she reached both hands up and closed them on the wooden slats. “Do you… Do you want to tie me?”
Harry sank a second finger inside her, thumb flicking her clit again. “Do I need to?” After all, she’d made it perfectly clear she could be a handful when the mood struck her. Harry didn’t know that he’d mind at all if she were to challenge him and make bondage a necessity.
December shook her head, her hair a dark cloud on the pillow. “No.”
“Good girl. Then no, I don’t want to tie you. Not tonight.” Letting her know it would definitely come up later. The mental image of December with her beautiful pale skin wrapped in midnight blue rope, kneeling for him – it took his breath away. He was suddenly glad he’d paid attention when Bas gave lessons in shibari at the club. Harry didn’t know why his mind chose midnight blue ropes for her, but it seemed as if it’d suit her coloring – the dark hair that fell to just above her waist, her warm, chocolate eyes, and the pristine pale expanse of her skin, like fine china that his fingers itched to memorize.
Harry knelt up between her thighs and withdrew his fingers, bringing them to his nose first – inhaling with a low moan of pleasure – and then slipped them into his mouth, her gaze following his movements, watching him and her tongue slipped out to wet her lips as though she could taste herself on them the way he could. Harry leaned over her, hands braced on either side of her, and bent to kiss those wet lips, giving her the taste she sought.
His tongue swept into her mouth and December latched onto it the way she latched onto him, sucking deeply even as her long legs slung around his hips and held him to her. As though he’d go away or stop. Or maybe just being the greedy little sub she’d earlier proven to be. Harry didn’t know, didn’t care, and it didn’t matter because the fucking apocalypse could st
rike right then and there and he didn’t think he’d have the willpower to let her go.
For a man who’d lost his confidence as a Dom, Harry did a damn fine job of pinging every one of December’s sub triggers. The tone of his voice and the look in his eyes. The way he positioned her how he wanted her and did what he wanted but still watched to make sure she wanted it too. He was commanding and powerful and so fucking sexy… And it wouldn’t last.
It wouldn’t last because if it could, she wouldn’t be there. It was hard to keep that in the back of her mind – the job bit – when her body and her mind wanted to sink into the delicious haze of subspace, something that in most circumstances didn’t happen until much deeper into the relationship between herself and a client, if at all. Harry, however, tugged unknowingly at her, like an invisible rope tied deep inside that he had full control of.
Her fingers clung to the slats of the headboard, breath quickening as Harry broke the kiss and met her gaze with a seductive smile. Oh, he was overwhelming in every way. He might as well have bound her to his bed. He held her in invisible bonds that had nothing to do with her professional reputation or the money in her bank account and everything to do with the way he made her feel.
He made her feel out of control in the best possible way. She longed to fling herself into his arms and leave herself in his hands and give him everything. She quaked inside just thinking it.
Then Harry gave her a sexy little smile and slid down, trailing scorching kisses to the most tender, sensitive spots on her body and she gasped, hands tightening on the bed frame as anticipation whipped through her. Oh god, yes. She bit her lip and spread her thighs, heels braced on the mattress as his mouth – oh that wicked, delicious mouth – worked its way lower and lower until his breath warmed the crazy sensitive juncture where thigh met hip. That little hollow that seemed to serve only as a place for the sweat of a long, deep fuck to settle. She shook like a leaf and he hadn’t so much as touched her with anything but his breath.