by Jessica Kapp
“That’s not fair, you got to see all of that from magazine clippings.”
Parker paces faster, but he might as well be stomping on my dreams.
“He’s known you a fraction of the time I have. So he got you out? What happens when he gets tired of running? He has a family and friends, Tabitha. Hell, he can drive and get a job. Is he really going to stick around?” Parker stops in front of me. His eyes are intense, and I can’t look away. He squats down and lifts my chin; our noses almost touch. “The people out here don’t understand what it feels like to be us. You’re the closest thing I’ve ever had to family and I’d do anything to protect you.”
The kiss starts and ends so fast I don’t even have time to blink.
“Right now, it’s us against them,” he says, standing again. He waves at the window to the world outside. “You may not see it, but Gavin’s using you…for something.”
For a moment the air slips out of me. I can’t breathe. Parker has scared the what if right back into me. I want to box my heart up and hand it over to Parker for safekeeping. What if he’s right? What if this is just a minor detour on the road to heartbreak before I take the familiar path back to Parker? Or worse, what if I don’t even get the chance to recover? Is Gavin using me? Is he planning to turn me in himself?
No. He would have done that already. Right? I try to bury my doubt, but it’s like a rash that’s spreading, an itch that won’t go away. Gavin still has secrets, and I have no idea what they are. But they make me feel scared for myself, and for my friends.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about, Parker.” My voice cracks.
“You’re making a mistake. I wish you’d just see it.” He sits next to me and runs his hands through his hair with such force I glance at his fingers to see if he’s yanked out a clump. “I’ll be watching him like a hawk. If he so much as makes you lose an eyelash,” he punches his hand, “I’ll pummel him.”
Parker sounds so sure of himself—just like he was at the Center; it’s hard not to smile a little on the inside. He always looked out for me. I should be grateful that part of him hasn’t changed. But I’m uneasy and I’m not sure if it’s because of what Parker said, or the fact that he made me question myself. Whatever it is, the lump sits firmly in the pit of my stomach.
Voices in the hall remind me we’re not alone. The door flies open and the light kicks on before we can move.
“And here they are,” Gavin says. He extends a hand to me and I take it, leaving Parker alone on the bed. Gavin pulls me close to him, like he’s introducing me to an untamed dog, worried it will nip at me. “Dad, this is Tabitha.”
The man beside him eyes me with wonder. His skin is slightly darker than Gavin’s, his forehead broader. Still, there’s a striking resemblance.
I glance back at Parker with a look that says, See! I get to meet his dad.
“Hello, sir.” I shake the man’s hand.
“Please, call me Bracken.” He doesn’t let go until Gavin clears his throat.
I don’t have to turn to know Parker is on his feet. His body is so close I can feel the warmth on my back.
“And who’s this?” Bracken asks.
“Tabitha’s best friend,” says Parker, ignoring the outstretched hand. Gavin’s father drops his arm and his smile weakens.
“You must be quite an athlete,” Bracken says, eyeing Parker’s torso.
A twinge of pain crosses Gavin’s face that makes me wonder what kind of compliments—if any—his dad has given him through the years.
“Like I explained, both of them are from the Center,” says Gavin. “They trained daily.”
“Well I’ll be…” Bracken’s eyes widen. “It’s not just a rumor, then.” He presses his lips together.
“Now that you’ve met them,” Gavin says, “let’s talk. Downstairs in the lab.”
Bracken nods. “Help yourself to anything in the kitchen.” He obediently follows Gavin down the hall.
Parker and I exchange a wary look.
What do they need to talk about? Alone?
As if he’s thinking the same thing, Parker motions toward the door. “Let’s get some fresh air.” When we walk outside, I’m surprised how much easier it is to breathe. Then Parker grabs my arm.
“I think we should leave,” he says, jerking the air out of me. I’m so stunned that he manages to drag me halfway toward the trees that surround the side of the property.
I slip out of his grip and he stops, glancing back at me with dread in his eyes.
“I’m not going anywhere, Parker. They’re just talking.”
“Yeah. In a lab. Doesn’t that bother you?”
I ignore his question. “And just where are we supposed to go? We have no identification.”
Parker grits his teeth and growls under his breath. “Why do you want to stay? Didn’t you see his dad? How he looked at you? He’s a scientist, you said so yourself. He probably wants to chop you up. Doesn’t that freak you out?”
My insides feel like they’re already being diced. What if Parker’s right? I don’t know anything about Gavin’s dad other than his obsession with work—which happens to be for PharmPerfect.
“He was practically drooling when he saw you. He might as well pin you to a corkboard like a butterfly.”
My instincts tell me to fight, or better yet, run. Then there’s this steady little voice that keeps time with the beat of my heart, trying to convince me to wait. “Gavin hasn’t given me any reason not to trust him.”
“Well, I don’t. And you shouldn’t either.” Parker climbs into Gavin’s truck, pulling down the visor and checking the ignition. “If he left the keys, we can get out of here before he gets back.”
I try to pull him out, but he shakes me off and I lose my hold, falling to the ground. I land with a thud and yelp in pain.
“Are you okay?” Parker hops down from the driver’s seat. “I didn’t mean for that to happen. I just want out of here. Something’s not right.”
My tailbone hurts, but not as much as Parker’s words. They sting because there’s truth to them. Being here with Gavin’s dad makes me uncomfortable, trapped like a bug in a jar.
“It doesn’t matter. We can’t go anywhere. Even if he did leave the keys, it’s not like you can drive. Face it; we have to trust Gavin. For now.”
A manila folder sticks out of the door pocket behind Parker. It flaps in the breeze, waving me over. My eyes lock in and I stand. My feet seem to move on their own. It’s the paperwork Gavin said was for his dad. Why is it still in the truck, then?
I open the file before I can talk myself out of it, and my jaw drops.
“What is it?” Parker leans in from the side.
“It’s a letter…”
“Who’s the guy in the picture?” Parker reads over my shoulder. “General Mitchell Rhodes, Special Forces.” He hitches a breath. “Is that…”
I nod, and the horizon tilts. Parker catches my arm as I sway. “He—he’s alive.”
“It says he’s a widow, that his wife and child died in a car accident.”
I focus my eyes and scan the list of assignments he went on, countries he visited. One of the dates sticks out, and I point with a shaky finger. “This is the month and year they said my parents died. But my dad wasn’t even in the country then, so how could this be right?” My stomach rolls.
“I don’t know.” Parker stands in front of me and lifts my chin. “But at least he’s not dead.”
Parker’s right. I don’t know what happened to my mom, but my dad is out there somewhere.
And Gavin knew. Why would he keep this from me?
My heart can’t decide which way to break. Tears erupt and I fall into Parker’s arms.
“Let’s get out of here,” he says. I nod into his shoulder.
Chapter 24
We run across the main road into the dense forest. The undergrowth is thick, full of supersized ferns and decaying logs. Each step is harder than the last. At this rate, it’ll t
ake us an hour to get twenty yards.
“This is ridiculous,” I say, so frustrated it almost comes out as a laugh. I turn around to head back toward the sound of traffic.
“Where are you going?”
“I have a better idea.” I stick my thumb out. “We’re going to hitchhike.”
Parker smirks. “You’re supposed to point your thumb at the road, not the woods.”
I switch hands. “It’s not like I’ve ever done this before.”
“Maybe I should try driving? At least we won’t have to wait.”
“Thanks, but I’m not ready to die yet.”
Parker stands next to me and sticks his thumb out too. Cars whiz by. One slows, but the driver changes his mind and takes off as we jog toward it. Parker looks strong enough to lift a small car. I don’t blame people for not wanting to stop.
After several minutes, a semi truck slows, its brakes screeching. When the trailer passes us, I spot Gavin on the other side of the road.
He waves frantically as he calls out, “Tabitha!”
Parker grabs my hand and pulls, but my body doesn’t move. “Come on. He can’t hurt you anymore.”
He tugs again, hard enough for me to snap out of it. I tear my eyes away from Gavin and we dart for the truck.
“Wait!” Gavin yells. “Come back!” Tires skid and a car blares its horn.
Parker reaches for the door handle, but before I can get in, Gavin grabs my shoulder.
“Let her go!” Parker lunges at Gavin, pinning his throat against the trailer with his forearm. Gavin gasps for air, clawing at Parker’s hand.
As he struggles to free himself, our eyes lock. His words are barely audible. “Why…this…?”
“What’s going on out there?” the truck driver hollers.
Parker pulls his arm back and motions for me to get in the cab. “Now’s our chance.”
But I can’t leave. Not when I have so many questions. Why did Gavin keep my father a secret? And does he know what happened to my mom? Is she alive?
I shut the door. Parker groans as the truck drives away.
Between coughs, Gavin says, “What…the hell…was that about?”
I pull the paper from my pocket and shake the letter at him. “My father’s alive. How could you keep this from me?” Parker’s nod punctuates my anger.
“Oh my God, Tabitha…it’s not what it looks like.” He grips his head, eyes wide and full of something…fear? Remorse? “I didn’t tell you because I haven’t found him yet. I didn’t want to get your hopes up.”
Too late.
My eyes burn and Gavin reaches out like he wants to console me, but Parker is quick to block his hand.
“How do we know you weren’t trying to keep her dad’s existence a secret?” Parker sticks a finger in Gavin’s face. “Maybe you never wanted her to find out. Maybe you and your dad had other plans for her.” He pulls his arm back and pretends to slice his neck.
“W-what? No! My dad would never—” Gavin clenches his hand by his side, eyes flitting from Parker to me like he’s afraid we’re going to run if he blinks wrong. “Come back to the house. I’ll explain everything.” He looks both ways, but Parker and I don’t move when he steps out to cross the street.
“We can talk right here,” says Parker.
Gavin comes back to the side of the road. He waits for a car to zoom by and takes a deep breath before he starts. “Chemical 31 is FDA approved, but it shouldn’t be. It’s so powerful they’ve had to dilute it so the regulators stay away. PharmPerfect wanted to find a way to make people tolerant to it.”
“What’s that have to do with Tabitha?” Parker snaps.
“I’m getting to that,” Gavin says, keeping his eyes locked on mine. “My dad was on the research team. They spent millions on tests but failed miserably. So they moved my dad to a different project, incurable diseases. He worked with a redheaded patient whose spine was liquefying. That’s when he discovered a gene variant, one that could handle some of the most powerful drugs without the damaging effects. A genetic loophole only in redheads that changed the way the woman could process drugs.”
“Like me?” I ask, my voice small.
“Yes, but the gene isn’t enough. A person also has to have a bacteria living in the intestines that can alter the chemical first. She didn’t.” Gavin’s chin drops. “When the woman died, PharmPerfect devoted all its energy to finding that one in a million person that would have both the variant and the gut bacteria.” Gavin steps closer. “Do you remember the first time we went to Dairy Land?” I can taste vanilla on my tongue, but the memory is bittersweet now. I manage a nod. “On the drive, you told me you were only six when they brought you to the Center. I would’ve been about seven. That was the first year I played little league, the year I met Ry. PharmPerfect put on this massive blood drive, they even cancelled practice one afternoon so parents could donate. The entire town got into it.”
“I Give,” I say out loud, making sense of the sticker on my mom’s polo shirt. Gavin wrinkles his forehead, but I motion for him to continue.
“According to the files Cherry stole for me, five people were flagged for cancer after the blood drive…including someone with the last name Rhodes. I’m assuming that was your mom.”
“She had cancer? But why would they—”
“She didn’t. It was a ploy to get people to submit to more tests. She had what they were looking for.”
“My mom was kidnapped so your dad could study her?”
Gavin’s hands go up in defense. “My dad was told the woman volunteered for the genetic study. I swear he knows nothing about what really happened.”
My breath shudders. “What did happen to her?”
“My dad said the woman died before the research could begin.”
A car speeds by and the air hits me like a shockwave. “They killed her?”
“I don’t know…something must have gone wrong. I wish I knew.”
There’s a squeeze in my chest. All that matters is she’s dead. The tiny bit of hope I clung to dies, and it’s like I’ve lost her all over again. Tears prick my eyes.
“My dad,” I say, voice shaky. “Why didn’t he come for me? He just believed what they told him?”
“From what I gather, PharmPerfect waited until he was sent on a training mission, then they made their move, staging your deaths. There was even a funeral.”
I wipe my face with the back of my hand. “Why? Why did they want us so bad?”
“To create a powerful new drug called Gideon. They want to grow the bacteria inside you then transfer the microorganisms into soldiers so they can take the drug without risk of liver failure. If they’re successful, it’ll land them a fat military contract.”
“What’s the drug supposed to do?” Parker asks as two motorcycles scream by.
“It uses the power of Clarity to improve decision making, Endurance so soldiers can work for days without needing to rest, and Power to make them stronger, faster—unstoppable. The doses are more than triple the legal limit. But if PharmPerfect can prove they’re safe with this microorganism transfer, they’d have the government eating out of their hands. Our military has been surpassed by almost every nation—we’re extremely vulnerable.”
I can feel Parker’s eyes on me. “This is why Kenny wanted me back so badly,” I say lacing my fingers over my head, desperate for air.
Gavin nods. “You were the entire reason he buddied up with Cherry. He used us to get you out. All he had to do was say he infiltrated our group and brought you back.” He paces along the side of the road, eyeing the driveway that leads to his house. “That military contract is within their grasp again unless we can keep you safe. Being out here in the open isn’t a good idea.”
“What if she agrees to let them make the bacteria in her?” Parker asks. “Will they stop chasing her?”
“That’s not how it works,” Gavin says. “She’ll be kept alive, but sedated. They’ll keep using her until the drug kills her.”
“You can. But in order to foster bacteria growth, you’d need to be given higher and higher concentrations of the drug. You can process it, but not forever. Not at the doses they’ll end up giving you.”
My stomach churns. “They’ll never stop looking for me.”
“Your dad might be able to help us if I can track him down,” Gavin says, “That’s what I’ve been trying to do. Finding him has been harder than I thought. Adrian’s been trying to break into military networks.” Gavin stops in front of us and reaches out. I stare at his hand, wondering if I should take it, but he drops it before I can decide. “I wanted to wait until we were on the mainland before I told you all of this. I’m sorry you had to find out this way. I was only trying to protect you.”
I’ve lost my mom, but I have a second chance with my dad if Gavin can find him. The gust of air from a truck that rushes by makes my knees weak. I’m in shock, floating in the unthinkable fantasy that I might hug my dad again.
Gavin seizes the opportunity and reaches for my face, his thumb caressing my jawline. Part of me melts, yearning for his warmth and safety. “We need to get back to my house, keep you hidden until we can catch the ferry.”
“What ferry? And what’s this talk about the mainland?” Parker asks, pulling Gavin’s arm down.
“Let’s get out of sight and we’ll figure everything out,” Gavin says, taking my hand and darting across the road. Parker obstinately follows.
“What about his dad?” Parker asks when he catches up to me. Anger radiates off of him. “How do we know he won’t just turn you in—”
“Like I said, he didn’t know she was being hunted down,” Gavin says sharply. He looks at me, his voice softer. “He had no idea what they’d done to you and your mom until I told him. That’s why I introduced you. He wants to help. PharmPerfect used him like they used you.”
“That’s hardly the same thing,” Parker says.
“Look,” Gavin says, taking a deep breath. “I know you don’t like me. But you have to trust me. I want to keep her safe just as much as you do.”