Red Flags

by C. C. Brown

  “Because I noticed the way she was treating you, from the second you got out of the truck. When she split the teams, I knew what was up.”

  “You two aren’t friends?”

  “You could call us associates. We run in the same circle, so we spend a good deal of time together. “ She took a look at my knee and thigh, and her eyes shot open. “We should get some ice on that.”

  “No. I’m okay. I don’t need Jason worrying.”

  We walked back out and Jason was sitting, away from the group, as they all conversed, laughing rather loudly. I limped back over to where they were sitting, bypassing Jason – suddenly angry with his lack of information. Everyone was ready for the next round when Becca unexpectedly announced that I would have to sit out, so unless someone else wanted to sit, that we were done. Jason’s eyes implored me to say something to him, but I remained silent. Everyone looked beat and decided it was best to pack it up, and head somewhere for lunch.

  “Fuck, can’t even last a whole game,” Stacey grumbled as she walked past me.

  I looked at her, astonished that she had so much built up animosity for someone she had just met. Jason stopped me and took my hand, holding me back from the group as they made their way inside.

  “Why are you stopping, what happened?”

  “I got hit Jason, that’s all.”

  “That’s not all if you can’t play anymore. How bad is it?”

  “A shot to my knee and thigh, Can we drop this? I’m hungry.” I was blunt with him, and while he was aware that something was up, he didn’t solicit me for any more information.

  <>

  We decided on Jose’s Cantina, a family run Mexican restaurant not far from where we were paintballing. I was quiet the entire ride over, further pissing Jason off. Luckily, the ride was less than 10 minutes long, because the air in the truck was thick, and it would have taken a machete to cut through it.

  We sat down and chips and salsa were placed on the table, drink orders were taken. Three pitchers of beer was ordered, and a pitcher of margarita. I sat despondent at the table, and looked around to see the bright yellow walls filled with pictures of the rich and famous that had frequented their establishment. They had taken photos with the owner, and signed them too.

  The conversation at the table sounded mildly entertaining, so I turned back and faced the group, putting on my best smile, and trying to seem connected.

  “Cara, how did you meet Jason?” Jared asked, gulping down a mug of beer and burping loudly at the table.

  “We met in class,” I smiled as politely as I could, given my disgust with his lack of table manners.

  “Yeah, we heard this guy had a girlfriend and we were shocked out of our skin.” Chris threw in, and sent a smug smile across the table in Jason’s direction. Jason, meanwhile, just leaned back in his chair, smirking in a very cavalier way.

  "Is that so unbelievable?” I asked, smiling back at Chris.

  “Actually, yeah, it is. You must be doing something right.” Chris smiled, with a mouth full of beer filling his cheeks like a chipmunk.

  “How did you all meet?” I asked, trying desperately to change the subject, and get Stacey’s burning eyes off of me.

  “Invictus,” Devon replied, “Jason was new to the gym, and I showed him around, I’d been there for a couple of years.”

  I nodded my head. These were his workout buddies and although this was the first time I was meeting them, most of them were pretty cordial. I continued to drink the margarita, and then excused myself to go to the restroom.

  Once inside, I heard the door open and I saw feet stop in front of my stall. I knew it was Stacey, so rather than hide; I came out to face her. Initially opening the door and seeing her face, I rolled my eyes at her and moved to the sink to wash my hands. She glowered at me in the mirror.

  “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” She asked, her face tight, not flinching an inch.

  “What are you talking about?” I replied, moving away from her to dry my hands.

  “Jason. You and him. Do you know who I am?”

  “Yeah actually I do. You were his fuck toy.”

  Her mouth dropped, and she smiled, a wicked little smile that sent shivers down my back.

  “Don’t know where you get your facts from, but you need to check them again. I was not just a fuck toy, we dated, and just when he wanted to go to the next step, I shut it down. He’s been trying to get me back, but I’m concerned when it comes to him.”

  I looked at her in horror, not sure if I could believe her or not. “What next step?”

  “Jason proposed to me. I accepted, but couldn't face marriage. I wasn’t ready for that, so I shut it down. We continued to be fuck buddies though, so I guess your statement is half correct.” She sneered, enjoying the pain that shot through my body. “He moved on to you, but trust me, it won’t go anywhere, YOU my dear, are a fuck toy.” She smiled and rubbed my shoulder, giving a half-hearted gesture of compassion.

  The color must have drained out of my face because she watered a paper towel and handed it to me. I took it, gratefully.

  “Jason was gone for a week. He saw you when, Sunday night?” My look of horror deepened. “He was with me all day Saturday and Sunday,” she smiled, turning quickly and heading out of the bathroom.

  My breathing was no longer rhythmic, but frantic. I didn’t want to believe a word that came out of Stacey’s vile mouth, but the fact that she knew when Jason saw me, and how long he was gone, didn’t bode well for my fledgling hopes. Why would he spend time with her, when he couldn’t spend a moment calling or texting me? Had Becca lied to me? I threw a few handfuls of water on my face, and made my way back out to the table.

  This had been the longest lunch of my life. Jason was having a good time with his friends, and the girls seemed to be enjoying each other’s company. Becca looked over at me and mouthed, you okay, and rather than rouse her suspicions, I nodded yes. The truth was, I had just met these people, who obviously spent a great deal of time together, so I couldn’t be sure if her concern was authentic or not.

  Jason paid the bill, because he never allows anyone else to do so, and took my hand, leading me out of the restaurant. I was sweating, and brooding with anger. Once we were inside the truck, I finally allowed the dam to burst.

  “Cara what the fuck happened?” His voice was filled with angst and concern.

  “Fuck you Jason. Take me home,” I shouted at him, because that’s all I could do.

  He started up the truck, shocked by my outburst, and shook his head. We pulled out of the parking lot, and once we hit the freeway, he finally started talking. “You have been a fuckin’ mess all day, what the hell is wrong with you?”

  “Your pretty little Stacey,” I threw back at him.

  “What about her?” He asked, looking over at me every so often.

  “Why would you take me to hang out with someone you’ve slept with – who obviously has feelings for you?”

  “That was a long time ago, and she’s seeing Dev now.”

  “Is that what you guys do, pass girls around in your circle?”

  Jason curled his upper lip, trying to gauge what I was saying. “I don’t get what you’re talking about. I haven’t been with Stacey like that in a long time,” he paused, “she’s free to move on to whomever she wants.”

  “So you never had a real relationship with her? I asked, my voice resembling a petulant child.

  “No.” he yelled, sounding appalled by the thought.

  “Liar. I can’t even stand to be around you right now. You not only had a relationship with her, but you also proposed to her, and it didn’t work out.”

  Jason’s face was filled shock and anger. “That was so long ago, and it didn’t last long? Where the hell did you hear that?” He was yelling so loud that the hum of the truck was being drowned out.

  “I don’t know who to believe.”

  ‘Why not start with me? Your boyfriend.”

  “Why would
I? When you were oh so busy, and couldn’t return a call or text, you were busy fucking Stacey.”

  Jason’s face reddened, signaling anger or guilt. He took two heavy breaths, and exhaled loudly. He rubbed his free hand through his hair, and looked over at me, with guilty eyes.

  “You don’t even need to say anything.” I faced forward, unable to stomach looking at him any longer.

  He passed the exit for my apartment, and we continued north.

  “Where are we going?”

  “Home,” he answered, not bothering to look my way.

  “My home is in the other direction. I’m not going to your house, you probably had Stacey there,” her name was like a rotten egg on my tongue. I pulled my phone out of my purse and Jason reached over and snatched it away. “What are you doing?” I asked, leaning over trying to get it back.

  “You’re not calling anyone. We’re going home, to discuss this like adults.”

  “You can’t take me against my will Jason, and besides, there’s nothing to discuss. Your face and lack of answers explains it all.”

  We took the rest of the ride in silence. I was so angry that I wanted to break something. Jason picked up speed, eager to get out of this confined space that had turned into a torture chamber as we barreled our way back to La Jolla. When he pulled into the garage, I jumped out of the truck and rushed into the house, not waiting on him. I briskly made my way to his room, my hurt knee and all, and started packing up my things when he came in behind me.

  “Cara, stop. Listen,” his voice was so calm it made my hair stand.

  “There is nothing for you to say Jason. You were caught,” I made out, as the tears started streaming down my face.

  “You haven’t given me a chance to explain anything,” he ran his hands through his hair, “God damn this,” he yelled, and hit the wall.

  “It’s too bad I had to find out the way I did Jason. You could have given me the courtesy you know.” I continued to throw my things into my bag, which Jason took from me, and sat me down.

  “I have never,” he emphasized the word never, “been with Stacey since being with you.”

  I stared up at him, through glossy eyes and the tears continued to stream down my cheeks. “Why was she around today?”

  “I don’t know. Dev must have invited her. I wouldn’t have.”

  “The bigger question is why were you with her when you were ignoring me?”

  “I admit, I was wrong for not contacting you, but while she was maliciously slandering me, she left out some critical pieces of information.”

  “And?” I asked impatiently, annoyed by the constant back and forth.

  "And, the truth is Stacey is from Heath. When I went home, she was home. I had to take care of some shit, and she was there. Our families are close; I’ve known Stacey since we were in high school.”

  “Devon said you were all gym buddies.”

  “Yes, I met the rest of the gang at the gym. When I moved here, Stacey moved here. She joined Invictus and we started back up. It didn’t last long. I didn't want her then, I don’t want her now.”

  My eyes were burning, and the constant blinking was all I could do to lessen the sting.

  “She's nothing Cara. She is a disgruntled ex, that’s all,” he breathed, looking visibly exhausted.

  I didn’t know what to say. I closed my eyes and swallowed hard, trying to clear the lump that had fixated itself in my throat. I stood up and walked over to the bathroom. After the day I’d had, I just wanted to soak in the tub and let my worries drift away. I took off my clothes, and hopped in while the water was still running. Jason watched me, looking relieved that I hadn’t darted out the door, and glided into the bathroom, stripping out of his clothes as he made his way to the tub. He got in, sat behind me and pulled me close. He pulled my hair tie out of my hair and nuzzled his nose in my hair, taking a long, deep breath.

  I stopped the water and propped my legs up. Jason looked forward and saw the bruising on my thigh and the swelling of my knee.

  “This is why Becca said you were done?” He asked, looking anxious.

  “Yeah, but it’s nothing, I’ve had worse on the diamond.”

  “Right, but no one was intentionally trying to hurt you.”

  “True. She is an evil little troll,” I said, and managed a slight giggle.

  “More like a damn pit bull. The girl is rough; Don’t let the pretty face fool ya.”

  I lay back and allowed Jason to massage my head; my hair was his favorite part on my body, well, second, only to my sweet spot. He washed me, and trailed tender kisses down my back. I was delighted that I decided to stay, because this felt right. I felt like I was right where I needed to be.

  We got out of the tub; Jason laid me down in his bed, completely naked, and instructed me not to move. When he returned, he had two ice packs and two ace bandages. He wrapped the ice packs around my bruises, making me wince from the sting the ice brought with it. After a few moments, I adjusted to the cold, and was able to relax. Jason stalked off to the kitchen to make me something to eat since I had virtually no appetite at Jose’s. While he was gone, I fished out my phone, and saw that I had three missed calls – one from Ryan and two from Chelsea.

  Listening to the voicemails, they were almost identical. Chelsea wanted me to spend Easter with her family, since lately, I was right here in La Jolla, and Ryan had invited me to spend Easter with him and Mila. I hadn’t given any thought to Easter plans, and I highly doubted Jason had either. I knew I promised my Mom that I would spend time with Ryan, but he would be with Mila, and we weren’t exactly seeing eye-to-eye right now. I would love to spend the day with Chelsea and her family, except Jason had a very lukewarm relationship with her.

  Jason returned with a ham and turkey sandwich on rye bread, and a bowl of strawberries with an iced tea. I sat up in the bed, anxious to quell my rumbling stomach, and smiled warmly at him. It’s amazing, and almost embarrassing, that a little over an hour ago, I was ready to storm out of here because I was under the impression that Jason had cheated with Stacey. I decided to find out what our plans should be for Easter Sunday, considering we could make it that far without a catastrophic event unfolding.

  “So, I have voicemails from Chels and Ryan asking about Easter.” He turned to me attentively. “What do you have planned?” I asked, trying to chew as quickly as I could.

  “I don’t have any plans, he shrugged. What do you want to do?”

  “I’d like to go to church. We can go to my parents’ church, I love it there. After that, I don’t know.”

  “I’m not huge on church, but if you want to go, I’ll go with you.”

  I looked at him, shocked. I would have assumed a Texas boy would have been raised in the church.

  “Not big on church?”

  “Does that shock you? My parents always had us in church. It was too much for me. If I go to church with you, then you have to do something for me.”

  I looked at him, wide eyed, and speculative. “What is it?” I asked, afraid of the answer.

  “We get to have an egg hunt.”

  I laughed, because at our age, an Easter egg hunt seemed completely absurd. “Jason, are you serious?”

  “Yes, I’m very serious. It’s a very,” he tapped his chin with his index finger, “adult egg hunt though.”

  I gasped, “Jason. That’s the Sabbath. No way am I doing that after coming home from church. Now what are we doing as far as company?”

  He shook his head, smirking at me, “Fine, we’ll have our egg hunt, and you’ll pay up on Monday – if that suits you.” I continued to look at him, in awe of his mood. “Where do you want to be for Easter?”

  “I don’t know. I feel like I need to be with my brother…”

  Jason cut me off, “then we go where your brother will be.” I know he was saying this because given our current situations; it was the lesser of two evils for him.

  “You just don’t want to be with Chelsea.”

  He pinned
me with the starkness of his gaze, “Gorgeous, I'll go anywhere you want to go, but I’d rather swallow glass than spend a holiday with Chelsea.” The seriousness in his face forced me to consider conceding this one.

  “With the way Mila is right now, I don’t know if I want to be around her,” I explained, trying hard to look vulnerable.

  “Then we don’t go anywhere. Problem solved.”

  “No Jason, problem not solved. I told my mom I would spend time with Ryan, but I’m really trying to avoid Mila.”

  “Look Cara, forget the juvenile stuff with Mila. You two suck it up, get along, and we’ll all be good. If you can’t, we’ll be right here; making sure to thank God for forgiving our repetitive sins,” his grin was so salacious, it made me blush. I was tempted to not make up with Mila just to see if Jason would make good on his threat.

  A quick phone call to Ryan changed my mind. His enthusiastic answers to my questions about Easter wilted me, so I gave in. He urged me to get over my hang up with Mila, and just enjoy the holiday, so that is exactly what I planned to do. Jason was thrilled because he got to avoid a night with Cruella Chelsea, as he referred to her.

  <>

  Jason came back into the room, after what looked like a short swim. He had his swim trunks on, hugging just at the V that formed to shape his package. He made me melt whenever I saw him that way, and most of the time; I’m not sure why I, of all people, got to see him that way. He moved about the room in a most bothered manner. What happened between our time discussing the holiday, and his swim?

  I didn’t have the energy to sit up and ponder about his mood, and asking him would lead to ambiguous, one word answers, so I decided to roll over and try to catch a nap. It felt like I’d nodded off for only a few minutes when a freshly showered Jason got into the bed and spooned me. If I tried to keep up with the ever shifting mood swings he possessed, I’d go dizzy from running around in circles. Instead of dwelling on that, I focused on him, and his ability to make me weak just by touching me. His touch was a feel that would never grow old for me. The warmth, the seduction – I craved it.