SOLACE: Behind The Shield (Beauty 0f Life Book 2)

by Laura Acton

  Dan studied Jon. The tactical lead remained an enigma and hard to read. An intense and demanding man, who never said anything kind to him. Jon’s usual decibel level when talking to him was somewhere near an explosion. The man continued to confuse the hell out of him. Case in point, Jon just called him Dano and spoke with a humorous tone.

  Loki chimed back in, “The Mega-Maniac Super-Duper Horror Fest is supposed to be the best maze they’ve done in years with tons of bloody body parts strewn around. Dan, we’ll have a blast running through the maze. One fright after another around each corner is what the flyer said.”

  Dan glared at Loki and stated emphatically, “No!”

  “Why not?”

  “Don’t want to.”

  “Why not?”

  “Are we back to this again?” Dan gritted his teeth.

  “Yes, because I don’t want to go alone.” Loki tried to use his puppy dog eyes on Dan.

  “Take Bram. He said he liked them.” Dan turned to Bram longing for support from the only member who seemed to give a damn about him.

  Nick, Jon, and Bram got a kick out Loki’s attempts to obtain a yes from Dan. Although as he sat, Nick decided to monitor Dan’s reactions.

  Bram met Dan’s gaze. “Sorry. Would love to, but I promised to take the girls to the Miss Julianne doll show.”

  Jon shivered and laughed. “Talk about scary. I’d rather be trapped in a maze with a real chainsaw murderer stalking me than attend a dolly show.”

  Everyone except Dan chuckled, and Jon noted Dan went somewhat pale at his comment.

  Nick asked, “So, Dan, you ever been to a corn maze?”

  “No.”

  Curious, Jon inquired, “Why not?”

  Dan couldn’t believe them today. “Huh, ‘cause I grew up in the friggin’ Arctic. No cornfields there. Give it a rest.” He began to sweat at the thought of entering a cornfield. When his hands tremored, he hid them in his lap hoping no one caught their movement.

  Nick discerned the change and Dan’s shaking hands he tried to hide. He decided to change the subject. “Okay, boys, time to start briefing. Lexa and Ray will join us after they finish with the kiddies.”

  He launched into a short briefing, which was more a chore assignment than anything else. The morning would be spent doing regular inventory and maintenance with patrolling slotted for the afternoon. After Nick dismissed the team, Dan swiftly left the room. Bram, Jon, and Nick all hung back as Loki wandered over to Tia’s desk.

  Waiting until they were alone, Nick said, “Did you guys catch Dan’s hands?”

  Both Bram and Jon nodded. Bram’s worry increased. “What’s up? Do you think he might actually be afraid?”

  Jon shrugged. “Don’t know, but I’ll tell Loki to back off when I return from the shoot house. Crispin needs me to observe his team.”

  Nick and Bram agreed that would be best, and they all headed out to take care of their assigned tasks.

  TRF HQ – Gun Cage – 10:10 a.m.

  On his way to locate Loki, Jon overheard shouting. He picked up his pace, rounded the corner, and found a scene he didn’t expect. Loki pinned up against a cage by Dan.

  Intense blue fire blazed in Dan’s eyes as he roared, “Leave me the fuck alone! I don’t want to go to any goddamned corn maze!”

  Short of yelling, Jon used his most authoritative tone, “Broderick, stand down.”

  Dan immediately released Loki, pivoted on his heels, and stormed out of the room pushing by Jon. Stunned a moment, Jon stared at Loki. “You okay?”

  Shocked and bewildered, Loki stammered out, “Yeah. I don’t … I should’ve … Yeah.” Loki turned in circles, plainly upset. He stopped and peered at Jon apologetically. “I should’ve stopped. Apparently, he truly doesn’t want to go. I pushed too hard. Not his fault. I’ll apologize when he cools down.”

  Jon nodded. “You do that.” He turned to leave the room. Dammit, I should’ve told Loki to back off before going to the shoot house. Where did my pissed off rookie go? Jon stood in the doorway debating where to check first when Ray approached his position.

  Ray halted. “What’s with Dan? He’s visibly upset.”

  “Where’d you see him?”

  “Heading into the stairwell. Going up to the roof, I think.”

  Jon took off jogging.

  Ray entered the gun cage finding his best friend in an extremely agitated state. “Loki? You alright? What happened?”

  “I kept after Dan thinking we would have fun together. I wanted to repair the damage I did and get to know him better. I messed up again. He doesn’t want to hang out with me. I made things worse.”

  Ray put his arm around Loki. “He’ll calm down, and you can apologize. Things will be cool again.”

  Loki shook his head. “No, he’s gonna leave the team, and it is my fault.”

  Calmly, Ray replied, “If Dan leaves, it is because we all failed. You’ve been trying awfully hard to be a friend. Perhaps you need to pull back and take it slower. We treated him like crap and Dan might not be ready … leastwise not with us. Maybe Winter’s team would be better for him. I talked with Heath, and he said his sergeant wants Dan on their team.”

  Blowing out a breath and rubbing his sore shoulder, Loki recalled the fury in Dan’s voice. While being pinned to the cage, Loki saw Dan’s eyes up close and personal. Wild emotion swirled in those angry blue eyes. There must be something behind Dan refusing me, but I can’t figure out what. It is only a silly Halloween maze. Could he be frightened of them? Not likely.

  TRF HQ – Rooftop

  Dan stood with his face into the brisk wind. I blew it big time. I attacked a fellow officer. My ass will be gone tonight without even a chance to switch to Echo Team. Dammit, why wouldn’t Loki leave me alone? Doesn’t no mean no?

  Hearing the roof door open and the distinctive footfalls of his tactical lead, Dan braced himself. I guess I won’t even make it to end of shift. Jon is probably here to send me packing now. Sarge made it clear TRF doesn’t condone physical altercations. I’ll have to start all over with another police department. That is if they will hire me after they learn the reason for my dismissal. Dammit! I try to rebuild and put the pieces back together, but fate always sends a wrecking ball my way.

  “Dan?” Jon came to a stop a little way from the rookie giving him space, not wanting to crowd him if he remained enraged.

  Tensing at his name, Dan realized he had only one option—own up to his error in judgment and to take responsibility for his lack of control.

  Dan turned and came to attention as he made eye contact with his imposing, hard-featured, tactical leader. The man had command authority down pat, reminding him of Blaze, although their physical appearances were nothing alike other than both stood six-foot-two. Where Blaze possessed caring hazel eyes and jet-black hair, Jon’s eyes were cold gunmetal grey and his head bald.

  Shaking himself out of the comparison, Dan stated flatly, “Sir, I’m sorry. The altercation is entirely my fault. I lost control. It won’t happen again. Is Loki okay? I didn’t injure him, did I?”

  Now all Dan needed to do was wait for the hammer to fall. I can pack my locker in less than three minutes and be out of here in five. I have lots of practice packing and leaving in a hurry. Mission after mission for six straight years made him efficient at packing his gear.

  Jon approached at a deliberately slow pace. His rookie exuded his soldier persona standing at attention. Schooling his own features, he attempted to read Dan but found it was like staring at a blank page. Dan’s expression held no emotion at all, unlike Loki, whose every sentiment showed crystal clear.

  One thing Jon learned over the past months was Dan would stand at rigid attention until told to relax. “At ease, Broderick.” Ah hell, not much better, Dan is now at parade rest. How the hell do I connect with a soldier? I need to treat him like I would any of the others and not jump to conclusions. Dan deserves an opportunity to explain. “What happened back there?”

  Dan blinked. He a
lready told Jon he lost his self-control. What more does he want me to say? He reported simply, “Loki asked me to go to the corn maze. I said no. He asked again, and I pinned Loki to the cage wall. Assault, even if provoked, will not tolerated. I can be packed and out of here within five minutes, sir.”

  Taken aback by Dan’s last statement, Jon remained silent as he considered the situation. Dan believes I will fire him over this? The shake of Dan’s hands earlier came back to mind. Dan might very well be afraid of something. Understanding the fears of his officers allowed him to keep them safe in a situation where the anxiety might present itself. Though underhanded, Jon decided to use Dan’s belief to his advantage.

  “Explain to me why you don’t want to go with Loki. If you answer truthfully, I’ll entertain alternative discipline measures,” Jon stated firmly.

  He felt guilty about forcing Dan to tell him something personal under a false impression, but Jon scrutinized the rookie’s eyes as Bram suggested. If he had not been observing carefully, he would’ve missed the quick flicker of emotion in them. It was the first time he noticed. Bram is right. Those blue orbs briefly belied the stoic mask he wears. Though minuscule, the intense emotion caused Jon to seriously reconsider if he should’ve asked for the reason.

  “And if I don’t answer, sir?” Dan needed to know his options. He didn’t want to be kicked out of TRF, yet answering would require opening a sealed box and allowing his demons out. How Jon responded would decide whether or not he would explain.

  With one eyebrow cocked up, Jon silently regarded Dan as he reassessed his motives for asking Dan for an explanation. In truth, Dan’s reaction made him more curious. Although he had no intention of firing the rookie, if he remained silent, Dan might infer it and open up.

  Crap, if I don’t tell him, my ass is outta here. Dan inhaled deeply, steadying himself and preparing to rip open old wounds. “Sir, cornfields are not fun. Leastwise, not for me.” He stopped a moment to decide how much he could tell without revealing any classified information and configured the truth accordingly.

  “Had a recon mission. My unit was spotted, and we took the only cover available and entered a vast cornfield. A large group of terrorists, fifty or more, surrounded and trapped us. Spent four days playing hide and seek. They were exceedingly brutal when they located one of us.”

  Dan’s eyes glazed over as he visualized the blood and dismembered bodies of the unit members. Their screams as they were hacked apart—piece by piece—still resonated in Dan’s skull. He couldn’t save them.

  The slight shake of his body directly contradicted his monotone and emotionless voice. “An extraction unit came on the morning of the fifth day and eliminated the remaining ten terrorists. By that time, Shy and I had been out of ammo for two days and used only our k-bars for defense.”

  He closed his eyes for a fraction of a second and took a breath. “Me and Shy were the only two of our seven-man unit to make it out alive. Took us and the other unit the better part of the day to locate all the body parts of our guys so we could bring them home for burial.”

  Dan shook his head faintly, trying to banish the images. He swallowed hard and refocused on Jon. “So, sir, you see, I genuinely don’t want to go to a corn maze. Not scared, only brings back unpleasant memories.”

  Jon couldn’t believe—well he could—but goddamned, he didn’t want to believe what Dan went through. Unpleasant, is a gross understatement if I’ve ever heard one. Damn! Hiding in a cornfield for five days, sleep deprivation from being on constant alert, only having a knife for protection, listening to his buddies screams as they are brutally mutilated, and then searching for all their severed parts.

  Christ! My jest about being in a maze with a real chainsaw murderer isn’t too far from Dan’s reality. Shit! The team needs to learn to tread lightly with Dan and respect his boundaries. God only knows what other horrors Dan experienced during his time in the military.

  Jon cleared his throat. “I understand.” What the hell am I going to do now? He bought some time to think as he said, “Follow me.” Jon pivoted and strode for the roof door, his mind racing for a solution.

  Dan fell into step behind Jon like a condemned man, wondering what fate had in store for him now. Apprehensive and tense, he wished he had not lost control.

  Of Geese and Men

  4

  October 30

  TRF HQ – Gun Cage

  Relieved to find only Loki in the cage as this made the solution to his conundrum possible, Jon stopped in front of a disconcerted Loki. As he walked down the stairs, he came up with a plan he hoped would help both his officers. After the extensive review of Broderick’s strengths and weaknesses, and the chats he had with both Bram and Nick, Jon finally realized Dan might be lonely and in need of a friend. Loki also needed friends, he had Ray and Lexa but no one else he hung out with after work.

  Dan, two steps behind Jon, halted and waited silently for the tactical leader’s decision. He wondered why Jon didn’t fire him outright up on the roof. Dan breathed slow, preparing for whatever might come.

  Loki continued to kick himself for pushing Dan and sending him off the deep end. I should’ve respected Dan’s answer. I need a way to make it up to him. Since he knew next to nothing about him, he was at a loss how to proceed. Perhaps Lexa will have a suggestion. Loki stopped pacing when Jon entered, and he noted Dan behind him. Oh man, this isn’t good, Jon’s pissed. I’m gonna be counting ammo until I’m an old man.

  The three of them stood staring at each other for several moments, both Loki and Dan expecting Jon to speak first.

  Jon cleared his throat. “Dan, for your part in this, losing control and pushing Loki into the lockers, you will tell Loki exactly why you don’t want to go to the corn maze.”

  Dan’s face lost all color. He didn’t want to retell the event. “Sir?”

  Silencing him with a glare, Jon continued, “As for you, Loki. You will listen to his explanation without interruption. In the future, you will take Dan’s first answer and not push regardless of your intentions.”

  This is light punishment for what I did. Loki’s eyes squinted at Jon as he tried to suss out the reason. Turning his gaze to Dan, noting how pale he became, Loki’s insides twisted, realizing he probably wouldn’t like the insight he was about to obtain. He nodded slowly, his eyes reflecting nervousness.

  After pinching the bridge of his nose, Jon dropped his hand. “Additionally, you two will be partnered together for the next two weeks, beginning today. Lastly, you will both join me at the Pond after shift tonight. First round is on me. Second is on Loki.”

  Jon noted the uneasy demeanor of his officers. “Are we clear on that?”

  Both Loki and Dan replied, “Copy.”

  Nodding, Jon said, “Okay, Dan begin.”

  Dan told Loki the same version of the mission he revealed to Jon. The images conjured up caused Dan’s stomach to turn, but his voice remained monotone, unable to allow his emotions to show to these men. He broke down once in front of them when he told them of his involvement in Brody’s death, and he refused ever to expose himself again.

  Loki wanted to hurl. This was so much worse than he could’ve imagined. How can he relate this story with no emotion? Holy smokes, how the hell could Dan pick up the body parts of his buddies? His heart cracked for his new teammate. No wonder he wanted nothing to do with the corn maze. I was a first-rate jerk to keep asking Dan regardless of my well-meaning intentions.

  His mind shifting, Loki wondered how someone could survive for two days in a cornfield with only a knife to protect him. Loki decided he really didn’t want to be enlightened. When Dan finished the horrific tale, Loki said, “I’m sorry I didn’t take no for an answer and pushed you too far.”

  Dan gave a curt nod. “I apologize for pinning you to the cage. I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

  “Nah, I guess we’re even on slamming each other into things.”

  Jon relaxed slightly. This might work out well for us all. “Alright.
Now finish restocking then you’re on patrol for the rest of shift.”

  Gus’ Pond – 8:00 p.m.

  Dan sat at the table with the whole team. Once Lexa, Ray, and Bram heard that Jon insisted Dan and Loki go out for drinks after shift, they decided to come along. Sarge came too. He observed everyone except Sarge ordered a beer … he ordered ginger ale instead. Dan wondered why but didn’t ask.

  He nursed his beer as he listened to them joke with one another feeling like an interloper. Well, I am an outsider. They didn’t select me. He likened this to when he was with other units. The ones who treated him with indifference rather than outright disdain or murderous intent.

  The past five shifts felt like an episode of Twilight Zone. Patrolling with Loki, the techie talked non-stop. Loki went on and on about movies Dan never saw. Though, that was not hard to do since he never got the opportunity to watch movies as a kid and being in the field for so many years didn’t help either. Loki imparted the entire plot of an older film called ‘Short Circuit’ and swore his bomb-sniffing robot resembled Johnny Five from the movie.

  Though, one difference existed between the robots. Loki’s Lucille possessed a female persona. The way Loki talked about Lucille, one would assume it was his girlfriend. The others chimed in over the headset as they patrolled teasing Loki about his attachment to Lucille. Bram and Ray concluded the razzing by singing a horrible rendition of Kenny Roger’s song, ‘Don’t Leave Me Lucille’ after they described a time an explosion damaged the robot.

  Today had been strange and confusing. Lexa now sat next to him and kept glancing at him covertly. She scrutinized him a lot in the last few days. He caught her several times, and she swiftly turned her head like she had not been staring intently at him.

  Loki said, “I don’t get it. Why would someone name a bar Gus’ Pond when the owner is Dmitri Valentinovich? Shouldn’t it be Dmitri’s Pond?”

  Pulled from his musings, Dan gazed around the busy bar noting the wild geese motif. He stepped into the conversation for the first time. “In Russian, Gus’ means goose. Most likely named the Goose Pond.”