“Do you feel that, Mamm?” she was almost too afraid to ask.
Smiling, her mamm nodded. “The peace of Gott. I feel it!”
“It’s a Christmas miracle!”
“I pray it is so,” her mamm said softly.
Priscilla flung her arms around her mamm. “It is for sure and for certain.”
They both laughed for the first time since the accident. It felt liberating to be able to laugh; it had been long overdue.
Priscilla crossed to the stove and warmed up some milk for hot cocoa. Her mamm picked up her sewing again.
“Do you plan on attending the Christmas Skate Party on Saturday?”
Priscilla froze. She was too embarrassed to confide in her mamm about the way she’d been acting—especially since her bad behavior was the very reason she would not be attending the Christmas Skate.
“Is something wrong, Prissy? Don’t tell me no one offered to escort you.”
“Nee,” she admitted. “I was hoping to go with Tobias Fisher, but I messed up my chances of that happening.”
Priscilla slumped back into her chair at the table and tucked her fists under her chin. She felt discouragement settle in her all over again. She had made a big mess of things, and she wasn’t certain how she was going to fix it.
“Anything I can help with, Prissy?”
Tears welled up in her eyes. “I’ve made such a mess of things, mamm. I don’t think anyone can fix it. Ruby is mad at me, and so is Tobias. I’ve lied to everyone. I didn’t mean to, mamm. I’ve been so angry with Gott for taking away mei familye that I’ve taken it out on everyone around me—even you. I’m so sorry, mamm.”
The woman looked up from her sewing. “I’ve always found that honesty is best in these situations. Remember that an apology can go a long way.” She smiled gently.
“Danki, Mamm. I guess I have a lot of apologies to make.”
Her mamm nodded.
Priscilla stepped over to the stove and poured the steaming milk into two cups. She silently spooned in the cocoa while her thoughts reeled.
“What if Tobias won’t accept my apology?”
Her mamm grasped her cup of cocoa. “All you can do it try. If you don’t take a chance, you won’t know what Gott has in store for you. If Tobias cares for you, he will listen. Give him a chance to understand your dilemma by letting him know the truth.”
Priscilla sipped her hot beverage, remembering the kiss she and Tobias shared. It was the most wunderbaar feeling ever. She knew without a doubt that she loved him, but she feared her lies may have stifled any feelings he may have returned. But she also knew her mamm was usually right about most things, and so she tried not to fret.
“I will tell him later today when I see him at Goose Pond. But what about poor Ruby? She was stuck at home with her sprained ankle while I was trying my best to sabotage her relationship with Jesse for my own selfish reasons.”
Her mamm smiled lovingly. “You must tell her immediately what really happened. If you don’t, you will lose your nerve. Be certain to apologize—those words of regret go a long way. She will see your true heart, and so will Tobias. But it seems to me you owe an apology to Jesse as well.”
“Jah,” Priscilla admitted. “I’ve really made a mess of things. Please pray for me to have the courage to make it right with everyone before the skate party.”
Her mamm nodded with a smile that Priscilla hoped would remain in her heart.
Chapter Eight
Tobias hurried through his morning chores so he could go to the pond to prepare for the surprise he had in mind for Priscilla. He was thankful it wasn’t snowing, and when the youth gathered around the pond in a few hours for the day, Priscilla would be among them and would see what he had planned for her. He knew it would be his only chance to ask her to accompany him to the Christmas Skate tomorrow night, and he hoped his efforts would smooth things over with her enough to get her to accept his invitation.
“Why are you in such a hurry this morning?” Jesse asked.
Tobias struggled with his thoughts momentarily, wondering if he should share his plans with his older bruder. He had to tell someone, feeling he would burst if he didn’t reveal his love for Priscilla. He worried his announcement would welcome some opposition from Jesse, but he wasn’t certain he cared what his bruder thought. It was how he felt about her, and there was nothing he could do to stop the love he had in his heart. But that didn’t stop him from fearing judgment from Jesse.
“I have something I need to do for someone.”
Jesse slapped Tobias on the shoulder.
“Whatever it is, I’ll help you, so you can slow down a bit on these chores.”
“Nee, this is something I need to do on my own.”
Jesse looked at his bruder questionably. “We always work together. That is what gets the work done sooner. I don’t mind helping you.”
Tobias raised an eyebrow and rested the handle of the pitchfork under his chin. “Even if it’s for Priscilla Miller?”
Jesse immediately stopped pitching fresh hay into the horse stall and leaned against the pitchfork, mirroring Tobias. “Aren’t you taking my request to keep an eye on her a little too seriously?”
Tobias shook his head and picked up the shovel to muck out the stall next to the clean one. “I knew you wouldn’t understand,” he said under his breath.
Jesse leaned over the edge of the horse stall. “I can’t understand if you don’t give me a chance. Whatever it is, you can tell me, Tobias. Make me understand.”
Feeling suddenly very exposed and vulnerable, Tobias shook his head and went about finishing the chore.
Jesse chuckled. “You always were stubborn as a mule, little bruder.”
Tobias looked over his shoulder, sneering at Jesse, who was still laughing. “That is exactly why I won’t tell you anything.”
Jesse’s eyes grew wide. “You like her!”
“So what if I do?” Tobias said as he shoveled manure into the wheel barrow.
Jesse shook his head. “When I asked you to keep her away from me and Ruby, I didn’t mean for you to take it so seriously. I asked you to keep her occupied, not to fall in love with her!”
“Who said anything about love?” Tobias asked, his face heating up with anger.
“You didn’t have to tell me; I can see it in your eyes.”
Tobias turned sharply, manure flying off the end of the shovel and landing just short of his bruder’s boots. “Why is it a problem if I love Priscilla?”
Jesse looked down at the mess his bruder was making and snatched the shovel from his hands. “Let me do this. You’re too upset to do this right now, and you’re making more of mess than you’re cleaning up.”
Tobias stood aside and let Jesse take over the dirty work. He was perfectly content to pitch in the fresh hay instead. “Are you going to answer me?”
Jesse paused. “How can I put this nicely? Priscilla isn’t exactly the woman I would choose for you. She isn’t a very nice person.”
Tossing a final pitchfork full of hay into the stall, Tobias dropped the tool on the floor. “That’s because you don’t know her like I do. She’s hurting from the loss of her daed and bruder, and even though she has taken out her anger on others around her, she has a gut heart. Her circumstances don’t make her a bad person, just a person who is very much in need of love and understanding, and I intend to give her just that.” Tobias stormed off toward the other side of the barn. He would gather the eggs and take them into his mamm so he could hurry along breakfast. The sooner he finished with his obligations at home, the sooner he could get to the pond to set up his surprise for the woman he loved.
Jesse put down the shovel and followed Tobias toward the chicken coop that was situated inside the back end of the barn. He couldn’t leave things like that between them. Just because he didn’t agree with Tobias didn’t mean he wouldn’t support him if Priscilla was the one he loved. Besides, maybe with someone to love her, Priscilla would be nicer to those
around her—especially to Ruby, whom Jesse loved dearly.
Following the sound of disconcerted hens, Jesse found his bruder just before he exited the barn with a pail-full of fresh eggs. “I’m sorry I wasn’t more supportive when you trusted me with your feelings for Priscilla. I guess I allowed the shock of it to put words in my mouth that shouldn’t have come out. I didn’t mean to sound like I disapproved. I have faith in your judgment, and if you have faith in her…well, then that is gut enough for me.”
The look on Tobias’s face softened. “Danki, that means a lot to me that you are behind me on this. I’m already nervous enough that she will reject my offer to escort her to the Christmas Skate tomorrow night.”
Jesse tipped his head to one side, confusion setting in. “Why would she turn you down?”
Tobias looked at him sheepishly. “We got into a bit of an argument.”
Jesse chuckled nervously. “I hope it didn’t have anything to do with me.” He could tell by the look on his bruder’s face that he’d hit a nerve.
“We had a misunderstanding, but I know now that she doesn’t like you—she’s actually in lieb with me!”
Jesse’s face flushed. “That’s a relief, but why would she turn you down if she is in love with you?”
“We haven’t exactly settled our differences yet, but she left a peace offering for me, and I intend to do the same for her.”
Tobias hoped his plan would work; it seemed it was his only hope.
Chapter Nine
“You want to do what?” Jesse hollered. “Do you have any idea how many miles it is around this pond? Almost five, that’s how many!”
Tobias scoffed at his bruder. “I don’t intend to go all the way around the pond, just the short end where everyone usually sets their lanterns. This is where we always skated, and I want to be sure she sees it.”
Jesse sighed. “Everyone is going to see it. Are you sure this won’t embarrass her?”
Tobias scanned the area; there was no one in sight. “No one will know that they are for Priscilla. Only she and I will know—and you, of course, but I know you won’t say anything.” He looked to Jesse for reassurance that his secret was safe with him.
“I’m not going to tell anyone that I helped you with this. I certainly pray that no one shows up here early and catches us!”
“Me too,” Tobias agreed. “I figured if I start at the far end and you start here, we should have this done in less than thirty minutes.”
Jesse shook his head. “It’s going to take longer than that!”
“Nee, Jesse, each one only takes about a minute. You just drop, swish, get up, and do the next one!”
Jesse shook his head as he began to walk to the far end of the pond. It was a gut thing they were only making the snow angels along the short end of the oblong-shaped pond. By the time they finished with this much they would both be frozen to the bone. As he trudged through the deep snow to the other side, he called behind him. “I should have found out what you were up to before I volunteered to help you!”
Laughter echoed in the shelter of the trees that surrounded the pond. Blackbirds flapped from the tree branches as though they had been spooked by the sudden noise. They soared overhead as if to mock them, and Jesse felt foolish for what he was about to do for his bruder and Priscilla. He supposed he would do the same for Ruby if the situation were reversed.
Tobias dropped to the snow to make the first angel. His hope was that Priscilla would see his effort in a romantic light and accept his offer to escort her to the Christmas party tomorrow. If she accepted, and they had as gut a time as he suspected they would, then he would ask to begin to court her.
****
Priscilla readied herself to attend the last skate practice before the party tomorrow. She wasn’t certain she even wanted to go since she didn’t want to be embarrassed by not having an escort, but today, she had apologies to give and she felt newness in her spirit. Her plan was to talk to Ruby, Jesse, and Tobias all together so she wouldn’t have to repeat herself or drag out the pain of it any longer than she had to. She hadn’t even brought her skates with her, as she did not intend to spend any time on the ice. She was early, but she wanted to be the first to arrive so she could get everyone together for a quick chat in order that she could be gone before the youth arrived and started pairing off. She was filled with much remorse over what had transpired over the past several days, but it would soon be over—she hoped.
Priscilla stepped through the deep snow carefully so as not to get her boots too wet, for she had to walk all the way back home and didn’t want to freeze on the way. She needed new boots this year but had declined, telling her mamm she could make it through another winter with them. If truth be told, she didn’t want to burden the woman with another expense they didn’t need when they were still trying to get on their feet since the accident. There were a lot of things she had endured for the sake of her mamm, and hadn’t wanted to cause her to ask her onkel for assistance. It was bad enough they were residing in his haus, but her mamm could not afford the luxuries they used to be able to when her daed was working full time to support their familye.
As she neared the pond, Priscilla thought she saw Jesse. As she drew nearer, she could see that Tobias was there too.
They were making snow angels!
Priscilla ducked behind a tree and watched the two of them as they continued to drop the ground and swish their arms and legs into an arc to form the angels. Was Tobias mocking her? Why was he having Jesse help him? It angered her that they should put the snow angels out in the open where all the youth would see them when they arrived at the pond for the afternoon skate practice. She felt her heart thump as she watched the two of them. They continued until they met up in the middle of the pond where they stood back to survey their work.
After a few minutes, Tobias and Jesse threw their heads back in laughter. Hurt rose up in Priscilla, and tears threatened to spill from her. She swallowed down the tightness in her throat, determined not to cry over someone who was obviously not crying over her. How would she ever be able to face them again after knowing they were laughing at her?
Unable to control the sobs that pushed their way up through her throat, Priscilla cupped her mitten-clad hand over her mouth and turned from the tree. Fear pricked her like icy water running through her veins. Moving as quickly as she could through the deep snow, she held her hand closely over her mouth to stifle the sobs.
It was too late.
Tobias had spotted Priscilla from the corner of his eye. He took off in her direction calling after her. She quickened her steps and did not look back.
Chapter Ten
“Prissy, wait,” Tobias called after her.
Priscilla whipped her head around, red-rimmed eyes filled with tears glared at him.
“Don’t call me Prissy!”
Tobias caught up to her, his heart breaking at the sight of her. He wanted to pull her into his arms and soothe away her pain with kisses, but it was apparent she was upset, and he aimed to find out why.
“You interrupted my surprise for you.”
“All I saw was you and your brother mocking me! I confided in you about something very painful in my life, and you used it to make fun of me. Not only have you humiliated me, now your bruder knows my personal business. It’s apparent how much he despises me, but I suppose you agree with him.”
Tobias felt his heart clench behind his ribcage. The love he felt for her overwhelmed him. “You don’t understand, Prissy. He was helping me make the snow angels as a surprise for you. Jesse doesn’t despise you.”
“He does because of the lies I told to Ruby. I deserve every bit of contempt he shows me.”
She sobbed harder.
Tobias couldn’t stand to see her in so much pain, but he resisted the urge to hold her until they had settled things between them. If she truly loved him as much as he loved her, then he couldn’t risk upsetting her more. “Jesse doesn’t wish to show you contempt.”
> Priscilla found it hard to resist the smiling blue eyes that gazed upon her, but she had to protect her heart from breaking further. “I saw the two of you laughing. I don’t like being made fun of.”
Clenching his hands behind his back to keep from pulling her into his arms, Tobias fought the urge. He wanted to kiss her like his life depended on it, but he feared scaring her off. “We weren’t making fun of you. We—I would never make fun of you.”
Priscilla swiped at a tear that fell unchecked.
“Please leave me alone. This will never work between us. I’m sorry I lied to you, but I can’t keep hoping for something between us that can never be.”
“If you make me leave, I’m certain my heart will break.”
“But I can’t…”
“I know what you’re afraid of, Prissy. If you make me leave, then you will still be losing another mann in your life.”
Priscilla stiffened. “I’m aware that your bruder doesn’t like me!”
Tobias closed the space between them. “He may not like you for himself, but he likes you just fine for me.”
He wiped away a tear, allowing his fingers to sweep lovingly across her cheek. She sniffled and smiled, and he couldn’t resist smiling back at her.
“I don’t know if I can do this,” she confessed.
Tobias held her close. “How could you turn me away when you know how much it hurts to lose someone you love? Please don’t do that to me.”
“I don’t want to hurt you, but I don’t want to get hurt either.” She couldn’t look him in the eye.
The tension between them twisted like a thick rope, snagging at their ankles. That cord was so taught it ensnared them in their own trap. There was no escaping the love between them, and there was no denying what was destined to be.
Amish White Christmas: Three Complete Novellas (Snowflakes on Goose Pond, Snow Angels, The Gingerbread Haus {Amish Christian Romance}) Page 6