The first grey streaks of dawn were edging into the sky as they rumbled back towards London. Eloise sat beside Jack in the dark carriage, her head on his shoulder and her hand snugly held in his comforting grasp.
‘I was so frightened,’ she murmured. ‘I never doubted you would come for me, but I did not know how soon, or if you would be alone.’
Jack put his arm about her.
‘After he had ruined the card party so spectacularly this evening, the gentlemen were only too pleased to have an excuse to come after Deforge,’ he said, resting his cheek against her hair. ‘And your groom’s quick thinking put us on the right track immediately. I have quite forgiven him for hitting me over the head on Hampstead Heath.’
‘And me?’ she asked shyly. ‘Have you forgiven me for being so foolish?’
‘Of course. The person I do find it difficult to forgive is Allyngham for marrying you. And for committing a record of his indiscretions to paper. Damnably irresponsible for such a clever man.’
Eloise was silent, leaning against Jack and listening to the thud of his heart.
‘I think he began his journal because he was away from home and missing Alex,’ she said at last. ‘He continued to write it when he was at Allyngham for those few short months before Waterloo. I did not know what was in it and when it went missing I was not unduly concerned: I thought perhaps Tony had destroyed it himself. From what Sir Ronald told me I believe now it was stolen by a servant I had turned off for dishonesty. I knew the man had taken a few pieces of clothing when he left—a few shirts and a pair of boots.’ She gave a little sigh. ‘Things of such little value I did not pursue it. I thought the poor man would have a hard enough time of it, being turned off without a reference. He was illiterate, so he had no idea what was in the journal.’
‘And you think he passed it on to Deforge?’
‘Yes.’ She shuddered. ‘It was not until Deforge left me one of the pages in the gardens at Clevedon House that I realised just how, how explicit Tony’s journal was, and how dangerous that could be. Not to me.’ She sat up and looked at him, her eyes begging him to understand. ‘Not to me, but to Tony’s name, and of course to Alex, if it became public knowledge that they were…lovers.’
He put up a hand to stroke her cheek.
‘So you had to protect them, just as you had always done.’
‘Yes.’ She nodded. ‘We grew up together, you see. Tony and Alex were two years older and I thought they were wonderful, everything older brothers should be. They were never cruel, or spiteful, as boys often can be to a younger child, and we were always friends. We were allowed to run wild at Allyngham. Tony was the leader; he liked excitement and danger. Somehow I seemed to be the one who found ways to extricate us when Tony’s madcap schemes went awry. Even when the boys went off to school I was still the one they called upon in a fix. I remember I sold my pearls once, when Tony became embroiled with a moneylender and was too afraid to tell anyone in the college, and he certainly would not tell his father. But he paid me back as soon as he was able,’ she added quickly. ‘Tony was always very generous. And very kind.’
‘Kind!’ Jack muttered an oath under his breath. ‘I do not call it kind of him to wed you, to rob you of the opportunity to marry the man of your choice, to have children—’
She sat up and put a finger to his lips.
‘He was my choice. I loved him as a brother. And Alex, too. I wanted them to be happy. It was always plain to me that theirs was a very deep and abiding love. Alex still feels the loss, more keenly than I.’
‘Allyngham should not have married you!’
She shrugged.
‘I had to marry someone. I was the poor relation, brought up with the family but expected at some time to repay their kindness by making a good marriage of my own. Lord and Lady Allyngham did not attempt to force me into a marriage, but it was apparent—never said but always implied—that I must marry.’ She paused, looking back into the past. ‘Tony was army mad, so Lord Allyngham bought him a commission. Then his elder brother died and Tony was the heir. Suddenly his family were pushing him to marry—whenever he was home on leave they would invite a series of young ladies to meet him. Of course he did not want to wed any of them. He was far too kind to allow any woman to marry him unless she knew the situation and he could not risk telling anyone, so when he suggested that we should wed, it seemed the perfect solution, for all of us. Lord and Lady Allyngham never liked the match, but when they saw that Tony was adamant they relented.’
‘And how old were you then?’
‘I was seventeen.’
‘And he explained everything to you? You knew you were entering a sham marriage?’
‘I knew Tony could never love a woman as he loved Alex.’ She raised her chin and looked directly into his eyes. ‘That was all I needed to know. Sir Ronald thought Tony had…had corrupted me, but that is not so. Tony and Alex were always very discreet when I was present. I think I had a much happier marriage than many women. Tony always looked after me, always treated me with the utmost kindness. To the outside world he was the perfect husband.’
‘Except in one regard.’
A slight flush tinged her cheeks.
‘I never noticed the lack,’ she said softly, ‘until I met you.’
A low growl escaped Jack and he swept her into a crushing embrace. She clung to him, pressing her body against his as she gave him back kiss for kiss. Tiredness forgotten, Eloise found her body responding to his caresses. When at last he raised his head she lay in his arms, her head thrown back against his shoulder as she gazed up into his face. Suddenly she could not bear the thought of being apart from him for even a moment. She reached up and touched his cheek.
‘How, how soon can we be married by special licence?’ she whispered.
‘Ah. I have been thinking about that.’
‘Oh. I—um—I thought you wanted to be married with all speed.’
‘Yes, I know that is what I said, but after all that has happened I am afraid I have changed my mind.’
Eloise struggled to sit up. It was impossible to read his expression in the darkness, but his words sent her heart plummeting. Swallowing, she began nervously to smooth her gown over her knees.
‘I, I quite understand,’ she said, trying not to cry. ‘I am aware that you consider yourself under an, an obligation to Tony, but after all you have done for me, I think you have more than fulfilled that duty.’
‘Why, I think so, too.’
Her heart sank. Eloise gazed out of the window where the dawn was washing the landscape in shades of dirty grey. So he had reconsidered, he had realised how damaging it would be to marry her. He would have to love her very much indeed to risk everything for her. And he did not love her, he loved Clara Deforge. With great resolution she turned to face him.
‘Jack, there is something else I must tell you.’
He was leaning back in the corner of the carriage, half-asleep, but now he opened his eyes and regarded her.
‘More secrets?’
‘Not exactly.’ She did not smile. ‘When I was in the carriage with Sir Ronald, he—he mentioned his first wife.’ Jack did not move but she knew she had his attention. She continued, ‘He, um, he told me that he and Clara had fallen hopelessly in love when they first met and, and although their passion had cooled a little by the time she drowned herself, I do not think he wished her any harm.’
She waited, holding her breath, for his reply.
‘And you believe him?’
‘Yes.’ She nodded. ‘He had no reason to lie to me.’ She took his hand. ‘I wanted you to know that, Jack. I know it will hurt to think that she was not faithful to you, but she and Sir Ronald really did love one another.’
‘Thank you for telling me.’
He closed his eyes again. Anxiously she studied his face. There was no guessing his thoughts. After a few moments Jack opened his eyes and looked at her.
‘I beg your pardon,’ she whispered. ‘I thought it might help…’
>
He smiled.
‘It does. I am glad, truly, that she was not unhappy.’
She blinked rapidly. ‘I am sorry that she did not always love you…’
‘I am not. Not now. I did love her, but that is in the past, and knowing that she made her choice for love, not greed, or ambition—I will let her rest now.’ He reached out to stroke her cheek. ‘Did you think I still loved her? I don’t, you know. She will not come between us.’
She nodded, the knot of misery still tight in her chest. She had been foolish to think a respectable man would want her for a wife, but even as her hopes crumbled she realised that she did not want Jack to suggest she become his mistress: she had thought him different from those other men. She had thought him truly honourable. A lump filled her throat. It was her own fault; she had always been too fanciful. She knew very well that even honourable men had mistresses. Eloise had never considered herself in the role of a mistress, and she would not, even for Jack. Especially for Jack. She blinked, hard. Alex wanted to go home to mourn his lost love. She would return to Allyngham and do the same. As Jack went to pull her into his arms she held him off.
‘Please,’ she said, her voice not quite steady. ‘I know you think me fast, I know I have given you every reason to do so, but please, no more! I quite understand why you no longer wish to marry me, but—’
She heard Jack chuckle.
‘No, you don’t understand, Elle. Come here.’ He pulled her back into his arms. ‘I never said I didn’t want to marry you, but I will not wed you by special licence, my foolish love, because I intend to marry you with as much pomp and ceremony as we can muster, and that will take a little time to arrange. The only decisions you have to make, my sweet, are what you will wear, and whether you wish to be married from Allyngham, or from Henchard.’
She stared at him.
‘Truly?’ She put one hand up to his face, her fingers rubbing against the faint dark stubble on his cheek. ‘You would really do that for me?’ she said wonderingly. ‘But, but why?’
He gazed down at her. Even in the grey dawn light she could see the warm glow in his eyes.
‘Do you really have to ask?’
‘Y-yes,’ she whispered, hardly daring to hope. ‘Yes, I do.’
‘Because, my sweet innocent, I want the whole world to know how much I love you.’
‘Oh,’ she said, tears welling in her eyes, ‘you r-really love me?’
‘To distraction,’ he muttered, hugging her even tighter. ‘I cannot imagine life without you!’ He kissed her savagely. ‘I want you for a wife, Elle. A lover, a friend—a partner to stand beside me against the world!’ He kissed her again. ‘And we will be married in a positive fog of respectability.’
With a little sob she threw her arms about his neck.
‘Oh, Jack, it is what I hoped, what I dreamed of, but never dared believe…’
‘Well, you may believe it now,’ he murmured, gently nibbling her ear. ‘And as long as you love me, there is nothing to stand in our way.’
‘I do,’ she told him, hugging him tightly. ‘I love you more than I ever thought it possible!’
He gathered her to him and kissed her, gently at first, but as the kiss deepened his arms tightened protectively around her. She leaned into him, revelling in the way his body hardened against hers. He swung her round and pulled her across his lap, covering her face and neck with kisses while she clung to him, exulting in the hot, passionate embrace. When at last he released her they were both panting. She lay in his arms, her head resting on his chest and the steady thud of his heart beating against her cheek.
‘Happy now?’ he murmured, dropping a kiss on her hair.
‘Mmm. Jack?’
‘Yes?’ He began to nibble her ear.
‘Your plans for a respectable marriage,’ she murmured, closing her eyes as his lips trailed gently across her neck, painting a line of warm kisses on her skin. ‘The banns, a new gown—this will take at least a month. Does that mean I must hire a chaperon, and only see you in company until our wedding day?’
His mouth was moving across the soft swell of her breast, but at her words he raised his head and looked at her. There was sufficient light in the carriage for her to see the gleam in his dark eyes and what she read there sent a delicious tingle running down to her very toes.
‘Well,’ he said, giving her a wicked smile, ‘I don’t think we need to be quite that respectable!’
All the characters in this book have no existence outside the imagination of the author, and have no relation whatsoever to anyone bearing the same name or names. They are not even distantly inspired by any individual known or unknown to the author, and all the incidents are pure invention.
All Rights Reserved including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form. This edition is published by arrangement with Harlequin Enterprises II BV/S.à.r.l. The text of this publication or any part thereof may not be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, storage in an information retrieval system, or otherwise, without the written permission of the publisher.
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® and TM are trademarks owned and used by the trademark owner and/or its licensee. Trademarks marked with ® are registered with the United Kingdom Patent Office and/or the Office for Harmonisation in the Internal Market and in other countries.
First published in Great Britain 2010
Harlequin Mills & Boon Limited,
Eton House, 18-24 Paradise Road, Richmond, Surrey TW9 1SR
© Sarah Mallory 2010
ISBN: 978-1-4089-1663-6
Table of Contents
Prologue
Chapter One It was more than a year after the decisive battle at Waterloo that Jack Clifton returned
Chapter One
Chapter Two Eloise sipped at her morning chocolate. Last night had not gone quite as planned. Lord B
Chapter Two
Chapter Three The following morning Jack took a cab into the City. His first meeting with his lawyer
Chapter Three
Chapter Four Anger, revulsion and disappointment churned in her stomach. The major might be an odiou
Chapter Four
Chapter Five Eloise looked around the crowded ballroom. The plans were laid: tonight, very publicly,
Chapter Five
Chapter Six After the darkness of the arbour the lamps strung amongst the trees of the Druid’s Walk
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven Lady Chastleton’s rout promised to be a huge success: the elegant salons were so full
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight Eloise’s head snapped around. She watched Jack Clifton walk into the room, tall and el
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine ‘So Mortimer is arrived. The Glorious Allyngham’s lapdog.’ Jack heard Deforge’s words a
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten As if released from a spell, Eloise ran down the steps and fell to her knees beside Alex
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven Eloise sped through the dim corridors and down the stairs, scarcely aware of the cold
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve ‘My lady, are you going downstairs for dinner?’ Alice’s voice roused Eloise from her
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen A quiet dinner alone did much to restore Eloise’s good humour and by the time she s
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen Eloise was sitting at the breakfast table, her head on her hands when Noyes announc
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen Sitting in the darkened carriage with Eloise in hi
s arms, a quiet, joyous elation sw
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen It was only to be expected that Sir Ronald Deforge’s party would be the crush of the
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen Jack was putting the finishing touches to his neckcloth when he heard voices on th
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen A sleepless night did nothing to relieve Eloise’s depression, but neither did it sh
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen ‘I thank Providence for Alex Mortimer,’ said Jack, unable to suppress a smile. ‘I t
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty They rattled on and Eloise kept her gaze firmly fixed upon the window. She forced her
Chapter Twenty
Disgrace and Desire Page 26