by Nancy Mehl
“You were there,” I said slowly. “I should have realized it. You admitted as much to Sam and me. You mentioned Jacob standing in the open with trees all around him. We never told you exactly where it happened. You knew because you saw him. I knew I’d missed something.”
He shook his head. “I didn’t even realize I’d said that. I was so panicked after you told me you knew about Jacob.”
I took a step closer to Emily. Levi didn’t seem to notice. “So you confronted him that night, Levi?”
He looked down at the dock, his body shaking with sobs. “I confronted him all right. He told me what he did to you, Emily. And he was proud of it. Laughed as he said horrible, vile things.”
“And that’s when you picked up a rock and hit him?” I tried to keep my voice steady. I didn’t want to spook him.
He nodded slowly. “It—it was in my hand before I realized it. I just wanted him to quit talking about Emily—to stop saying those things. I—I didn’t mean to kill him.” He looked up at us, his eyes pleading for understanding.
“I believe you, Levi,” Emily said. “No matter what happens, Abel and I will stand with you. You know that, don’t you?”
He ignored her and looked at me. “I’m sorry about the vase and the fire. I wasn’t trying to hurt you. I just wanted you to leave town. I couldn’t risk anyone knowing about Jacob. If I’d known that you already knew the truth, I never would have done those things. Especially the fire. I’d hoped the house would burn down and you’d leave town. Maybe no one would ever dig up the land and find the body.” He shook his head. “I set the fire and then drove into town to meet you and Sam. I figured that since most people were still at work, by the time help arrived, the house would be gone.” A sob ripped through him. “And then you told me about Ben’s letter. I couldn’t believe it. I didn’t know what to do. Here I’d caused you all this trouble for no reason. Decades of carrying the guilt of murder and trying to keep the past hidden. I—I just can’t do it anymore. It’s too much to bear.”
“But even if the body had been discovered, why would anyone have suspected you?” I asked gently.
He shrugged. “As long as Jacob stayed buried, my sin was buried. I’ve spent years trying to pretend it never happened. Th– that it was just a bad dream. If Jacob was found, I wouldn’t be able to do that anymore. It would be obvious to everyone that he’d been murdered. I would never be able to allow someone else to take the blame. The pressure of what I’ve done was already too much. That would be beyond comprehension. I’d have to admit to everyone, even myself, that I’m a cold-blooded murderer.” He blinked several times and looked at Emily. “I—I wrote a note that explained all of this. It’s in the back room of the store. I knew it would be found after—after...”
“Oh Levi,” Emily said, her voice catching.
“Did you know it was Benjamin who buried the body?” I asked gently. I knew I had to keep him talking until Sam arrived.
He nodded and refocused his attention to me. “When I realized he was dead, I went down to the lake for a while, trying to figure out what to do. When I finally went back to the clearing, I found Ben digging a grave. I couldn’t believe it. At first I wondered if he’d seen me kill Jacob. Then I realized he must have thought his brother did it.”
“And you let him continue to believe that all these years?” Emily asked.
“Yes. I know it was wrong, but I was frightened. Scared to go to prison. At first what happened seemed like the answer to everything. Jacob was gone. Everyone believed he’d left town. I thought it was an answer from God. But down through the years it ate at me. And as I watched Ben distance himself from his family, I knew it was my fault.” He shook his head. “I was a coward. I just stood by and let it happen. You know, I always told myself that the truth would come out someday. There were just too many people involved. Daniel and Beverly. Ben.” He focused his attention to me. “And Sweetie ... That night, when I found Ben planting Jacob in the ground, I noticed her watching him from another spot in the trees. But she suddenly took off toward the lake. I tried to follow her, to see if she was all right, but she ran too fast. I’ve always wondered if she saw me. In all these years she’s never said a word.”
“She didn’t see you,” I said. “She thought it was Benjamin who chased her.”
Levi’s eyes grew large. “She never asked him about it?”
“No. But she’s been afraid all these years that he thought she’d killed Glick.”
“So many lies,” Emily whispered, tears falling down her cheeks. “So many secrets.”
“And so much hurt,” I finished for her. “Hurt that didn’t have to happen.”
“It’s all my fault,” Levi said, his voice breaking. “If I’d only told the truth.” He stepped closer to the edge and stared into the water. “I wonder if it’s true—that this lake will wash your troubles away. I—I pray it will wash everyone’s troubles away.” He took another step. His voice was monotone, and he moved as if he were in a trance. Fear that he would actually jump wiggled inside me. I was trying to figure out a way to rush him—to keep him from jumping in when Emily spoke up.
“Levi Hoffman, you will not take the easy way out this time! Do you hear me?” Her sharp tone caught the distraught man’s attention. “You’ve caused all this pain because you didn’t tell the truth. It’s time now for you to be a man and take your punishment. If you jump into that lake, the people who need to ask you questions—who need to understand—will be cheated again.” Her voice softened a little. “The man I loved would never allow that to happen.”
Levi gazed blankly at her. He blinked several times—but then he took another step back toward the edge of the dock.
“Levi, if you really love me, then I want you to come to me.” She held out her hands to him.
Levi looked back at the water once more, but then a sob broke out from somewhere deep inside him and he ran unevenly up to us, throwing his arms around Emily.
Thankfully, I heard the slamming of car doors behind us. Sam and Abel had finally arrived. Now, even if Levi jumped into the water, they could save him. I felt my body relax for the first time since Ida had driven into town.
Still holding Levi in her arms, Emily began to lead him back to land. Buddy and I followed her. As we stepped off the dock, Sam and Abel came crashing through the trees, running toward us. Gabriel and Mary were right behind them.
“What’s going on?” Sam asked when he got to us.
“I’ll explain after we get Levi inside,” I said. For some reason, my voice quivered and I lost my balance, almost falling. It was as if my legs were made of rubber. Sam grabbed me and put his arm around my waist.
“It’s over, Sam,” I said as uncontrolled tears rolled down my cheeks. “It’s finally over.”
Chapter Nineteen
“So what will happen to Levi now?” Ruth asked as she passed around the plate of fried chicken. “I suppose there will be a trial?”
“I doubt it,” I said. “Levi admitted to the sheriff in Council Grove what he did all those years ago. I suppose they’ll transfer him to a larger city and sentence him.”
A sudden shout drew our attention away from the fantastic food brought forth from the good folks of Harmony for the community picnic. My idea for a simple get-together to thank those who’d worked on my uncle’s house had turned into a huge event. No one even remembered the original reason for the gathering. Everyone was having a wonderful time sharing a mild spring night with their family, friends, and neighbors.
Another boisterous bellow rang out. The women gathered at the table laughed at the antics of the men who’d put together a baseball game with odd rules and even stranger equipment. Sam had hit a softball past a package of unopened bread that lay on the ground. Abel and Gabe insisted that John had moved the bread when they weren’t looking and discounted John’s assertion that this signified a home run. However, the argument became moot when Buddy picked up the package in his mouth and began running around their des
ignated playing field. Watching Abel and Gabe run after him while Sam, John, Drew Crandall, and his father yelled enthusiastic comments at the playful dog brought gales of laughter from the rest of us. The men’s careful inclusion of Drew, the young man with Down syndrome, into their exploits was touching. He was having as much fun as the rest of them, laughing at Buddy’s attempt at disrupting the game. Finally, Sam, who pretended not to be interested in the bread at all, sucked Buddy into his clutches and grabbed the shredded loaf from his mouth. The men were now in a game of keep-away with one another.
“Can’t tell the difference between those men and little bitty boys,” Sweetie said around a mouthful of potato salad.
“That’s for certain.” Emily was able to smile tonight after a couple of days of emotional upheaval. Levi’s admission that he’d killed Jacob Glick because of his love for her had shaken her deeply. She finally told Abel about the rape. As I’d suspected, he wasn’t really surprised. His knowledge of Glick, as limited as it was, and his wife’s reaction to the mere mention of the man’s name, had caused Abel to suspect the truth years ago. References to Glick had occurred a few times in the past because of Abel’s interest in the memoirs and diaries left behind by early Harmony residents. Each time, Emily’s reaction had been similar to the one I’d witnessed Saturday at the café. It didn’t take a detective to realize something was wrong. Not feeling he should confront Emily before she was ready, Abel had spent a long time praying for his wife. His prayers, along with his undying love and support gave her the strength to finally bring her shameful secret out into the open. When seen in the light of God’s love, the darkness vanished, as did the humiliation and guilt. This revelation allowed her to accept God’s redemptive power to heal her pain.
She’d finally removed that sad painting off the wall in her dining room and replaced it with one of Hannah’s delightful landscapes. In fact, she and Abel had destroyed the self-portrait together and thrown the remnants on the fire. Now that it was finally vanquished, along with the fear of losing her family, she’d even promised to pick up a paintbrush again. Hannah was understandably delighted, as was Emily’s devoted husband.
In an odd twist of fate, although Levi Hoffman may have wanted to protect Emily when they were younger and failed, in admitting his part in Glick’s murder, he’d actually helped to set her free. I could only hope he’d find some comfort in that knowledge.
“Well, I can hardly believe what’s happened,” Ruth said. “Seeing Gabriel and John out there having fun with the other men—why it’s nothing short of a miracle.”
“Here’s another miracle,” Emily said with a smile. “Sunday morning we had some very special visitors.”
Ida, who sat beside me, reached over and hugged my arm. “That is correct. Gabriel, Sarah, and I came to church together.”
“That’s wonderful,” I said, kissing her on the cheek. “Just a visit or...”
“Not sure,” Ida said. “I do not want to push Gabriel. I think it could be a mistake. I just told him I would be going every Sunday I could and would love it if we could ride together. We will have to wait and see what happens.”
“Did the investigators fill that hole back up after they dug Glick out of the clearing?” Ruth asked.
I shuddered. “No. Something to do with possibly needing more evidence. They’ve got crime scene tape all around it. I don’t think they’ll keep it like that for long. Not with Levi’s confession. I’m just staying away. It gives me the creeps.”
“’Twas a might more creepy when Jacob was actually there,” Sweetie said. “You should rest better now that that mean old thing is gone.”
I sighed and speared a piece of watermelon with my fork. “I guess I do. Honestly, I’m not sure how I feel about any of this. It’s just too fresh, I guess.”
“Ruth told me you stopped by her shop to get some flowers for Ben’s grave,” Joyce said. “How did the visit with your uncle go?”
“It was good. I’m glad I went.” I smiled at Ruth. “And thank you so much for the lovely flowers. They look so pretty next to his headstone.”
I looked around at the people sitting at the large picnic table. “I haven’t had the chance to ask anyone before this, but who picked the inscription?”
“Why, Ben did, child,” Joyce said. “Who did you think chose it?”
I was pretty sure I knew the answer to my question before she said it, but I had to ask. After I’d found Benjamin’s headstone and read the inscription, I could only stand in front of it and weep. Under his name and the dates of his birth and death, these words had been inscribed: ’TIS GRACE THAT BROUGHT MR SAFE THUS FAR, AND GRACE WILL LEAD ME HOME. I couldn’t miss the capitalization of the second grace. Unless the engraver had made a mistake, my uncle had sent me a final message. He’d trusted me to find a way to lay his pain to rest. Being able to complete the task he’d left for me brought me great peace.
“So did you get ... what do they call it ... closure?” Emily asked.
I smiled. “You know, I think I did. I sat down and had a nice long conversation with my uncle. Told him everything that had happened since I came to Harmony. He may not have heard me, but it made me feel better.”
“He certainly left a lot behind for you to deal with,” Ruth said.
“I know. But now I understand it, and I’m at peace with it.”
“I’m sure your father was happy to know you’d put flowers on his brother’s final resting place,” Emily said.
“Yes—yes he was.”
The call I’d made to my dad had really thrown me for a loop. Telling him what Benjamin had tried to do for him was harder than I’d anticipated. I was glad to be free from our awful family secret, but I hadn’t fully anticipated how deep the emotional impact would be for my father. When I explained that his estrangement from his brother hadn’t been because Benjamin had rejected him but because he’d been trying to protect him, Dad broke down. Then I cleared up another mystery thanks to something Sweetie told me while we were planning the picnic. A few weeks before Benjamin died, she’d asked for the key to my father’s old bedroom so she could clean it. Benjamin refused. He’d told Sweetie that he missed his brother so much he couldn’t bear to have anything touched or changed. In fact, sometimes he’d pretend Daniel was still living in the house, just on the other side of the closed bedroom door. It shook me deeply to listen to my father cry. Of course, once he got control of his emotions, he went another direction. He chewed me out. Royally.
“Gracie, you should have told me what was going on the first night you got there,” he’d said sternly. “I hate that you went through something like this alone. I would have been there for you. You should have known that.”
After assuring him it would never happen again, and being pretty confident that I would never run up against a situation quite like this one again if I lived three lifetimes, we’d hung up. After putting the phone down, I’d had a good, long sobfest myself. Not sure exactly why, but I think it had something to do with relieving tension—and hearing my father cry. Not something I wanted to experience again for a long, long time.
“All kinds of changes going on in Harmony,” Ida said, pulling me back into the present. “I am getting a telephone!”
“Now that really is something,” Joyce said with a smile. “What made you decide to do it?”
The old woman shook her head. “After Gracie’s fire and Levi’s situation, I saw that I could have gotten help for my friends much faster if I had a telephone. I do not intend to let that happen again.”
I smiled at her, feeling a great sense of relief. Now if she ever needed help, she’d be able to call someone.
“You know,” Sweetie said, “all this goodwill has made me do some thinkin’. I—I was ponderin’ the idea of goin’ back to church myself.” She grinned at Emily. “Don’t think it will be your church, though. I don’t cotton to dresses, and those caps you wear would just look silly on my old head.”
Emily laughed good-naturedly. “Actua
lly, you could wear what you want and still be welcome at Bethel. But you should go where you feel most comfortable.”
“I should say you’d be welcome at Bethel!” Abel loudly proclaimed. He and Sam had finished their game and run up to the table. “We can’t tell you how much we appreciate what you did for us.”
I looked over at Sweetie who wrinkled up her face in a frown. “Now Abel, I told you to be quiet about that.”
He shook his head. “Sorry, Sweetie. I think all the blood must have rushed from my head out there with Sam chasing me all over the place. I forgot you didn’t want anyone to know.”