by Holly Rayner
It was dark, so Marianne couldn’t see much. Still, the towering mansion before them stood out, glowing as lights beamed out from various windows.
“Is this your house?” she asked.
He nodded, but said nothing.
Not a good start, taking her from a shelter to his mansion. He bypassed the house and instead drove on a dirt road that seemed to wind around the massive estate. As he reached a small hill, he pulled the car over and turned off the engine. He sat for a moment, staring ahead, then unbuckled his seat belt.
Following suit, Marianne opened her door and stepped out into the cool evening air. She wrapped her arms around herself as she fell in step with Jay, who began to walk up the hill.
There was a beautiful willow tree right at the top, and right beneath it, even in the dark, Marianne saw two matching gravestones.
Jay stood before them, his head lowered. She walked up to him and slid her hand into his, and together, they stood in silence for some time.
“That could have been me,” he said, his voice hoarse.
“What do you mean?” Marianne asked.
“Those people in line. All I could think about as they walked past was that I was one lucky adoption away from being in that line, far away in some other country. All that stands between me and them, is right here,” he said, gesturing to the stones in the ground.
Marianne stood silent, unsure of what to say.
“I’m not playing the victim here, I swear. The moment I stepped inside, I could feel how close I was to being someone who needed help like that. I understood that I have been trying to help in the wrong way. I believed that I was doing good, the right thing, as it were. And yet, so many of those people were there because of my company. Because of me.”
In that moment, Marianne felt the urge to rush to his defense.
“You can’t take the full blame. You’ve told me what you’ve done to try to resolve the issue. You’re doing everything you can.”
He cast her a sardonic smile.
“You don’t really believe that,” he said. “If you did, you wouldn’t have brought me there.”
“I admit that I wanted to see how you’d do in that situation. I wanted to see if you really knew the faces of those that had been hurt.”
His eyes narrowed as he winced, his expression tortured.
“I see them every night in my dreams. It’s why I don’t sleep. Actually, the only decent sleep I’ve had recently has been after our time together. It’s enough of a distraction, you see. I’m sure tonight I’ll get right back to it. And the worst of it is, there’s nothing I can do.”
Marianne placed her hands on her hips and glared at him.
“Now isn’t that the most defeatist thing I’ve ever heard!” she said.
His eyebrows shot up in surprise as he stared down at her. She gestured toward his parents’ tombstones.
“Do you think that when things got tough, your parents just rolled over and gave up? For heaven’s sake, look at the lengths they went to save you!”
“Yes, and then they died, and they took any kind of life roadmap with them. I was twenty years old, Marianne!”
“Yes, and I agree that is horrible, and difficult, and certainly a struggle. But you want to carry on their legacy. You told me they were philanthropists, that they got into the trenches and helped people where they needed it most. What you did tonight is probably the closest you’ve ever come to honoring their legacy.”
He stared at her in stunned silence. She did not look away, instead holding his gaze, searching his expression for some form of understanding to sink into that thick, perfect head.
“You know, no one has ever spoken to me this way before,” he said.
Marianne released a laugh, and she crossed her arms as she looked at him.
“Well, you’re the one always saying you wish people would treat you like a normal person. Here it is. I’ll tell you exactly what I think, when I think it, and that will never change.”
He stared at her, searching her gaze as though he could puzzle her out. Then, completely out of nowhere, he wrapped his hand in the tangles of her hair and kissed her with everything he had.
Marianne reacted instantly, wrapping herself around him and holding him close, wanting to dissolve his anguish and remove his pain all while desperately wanting him to be more than he was. Jay Parish was capable of amazing things, but he’d had no one to show him just how far he could go in the pursuit of helping others.
It was one thing to make money, to bring in jobs that could help people help themselves. It was another to be among the people, to truly hear their struggles and work to be a part of the active solution. Making a phone call to a lawyer every couple of days was one thing. Helping feed a family and keep them safe while riding out the storm was another.
All of this swept through her mind until Jay deepened the kiss, and all rational thought dissolved into desire for him. As she tightened her grip around his neck, a breeze blew past her, and she suddenly realized exactly where she was.
This wasn’t the time or place for such behavior.
She pulled back, and Jay landed a few extra kisses on her lips before he stepped back as well. Once again, their breathing was labored.
“I…I can’t…” Marianne breathed.
Jay stared at her as he fought to get his own emotions under control. After a few moments, Marianne turned and started walking back down the hill. In a beat, Jay was beside her. He opened her door for her this time, and she slid inside before he closed it behind her, encasing her in the warmth of the vehicle.
She nestled against the seat, battling with intense emotions. Her body was on fire, and all she wanted was to kiss Jay until she couldn’t think anymore. It felt so lovely not to be so burdened by the world, to be lost in the comfort of his embrace.
He got into the car next to her and took her hand, kissing the back of it.
“Would you like to stop in at the house and have some tea or something?” he asked.
She was wildly curious to know what the inside of that mansion looked like. Still, she knew that the longer she stayed, the less likely it would be that she would want to go home. She couldn’t trust herself to be alone with him when there was so much temptation.
The truth was, they were still under an arrangement. Until they could work out this whole marriage situation, and without knowing what Zoe thought of the man, Marianne couldn’t take such a meaningful step.
Not yet.
“Not right now, thank you,” she said. “I’d like to go home, please.”
He nodded and drove back off the estate, making quick work of driving down the highway until Marianne had to guide him back to where she lived.
“It’s one thing driving there myself, but last time I was here, I had my driver with me,” he said, apologetic.
Just a typical billionaire problem, she supposed.
“It’s all right. It’s quite normal to ask for directions, you know,” she said.
There was a small hint of teasing in her tone, and when she glanced over, she wondered if Jay’s mood had lightened at all.
His face was blank, cast in shadow as they passed under each streetlight. He pulled up in front of her house and parked the car. When he looked at her, there was regret in his eyes.
“I’m sorry. You’re right, about everything. There has to be more that I can do, even if I am legally bound from the investigation. I’m going to see how I can help the shelter more, and if there’s a way to directly impact those that have been affected. I’m going to try and make a difference in whatever way I can.”
He lifted Marianne’s hand again and pressed a soft kiss against it.
“Thank you for being so honest with me. For helping me see that I can do more.”
Marianne’s whole body tingled at his touch. It was hard to think with his lips so close to her skin, and so she pulled her hand back gently and nodded.
“I’m happy to help. Perhaps, in a way, I can serve as som
e kind of bridge between you and the working world.”
His lip twitched.
“You don’t think I’m in the working world?” he asked.
“Well, just…the world that exists beneath the fiftieth floor.”
His brows narrowed in thought, but he said nothing more.
“Good night, Jay,” she said.
“Good night, Marianne.”
She stepped out, but before she closed the door, she leaned over and peeked back inside.
“Oh, Jay? Try to get some decent sleep tonight. At the end of the day, we’re going to find a way to solve this. Those folks are stronger than you think, and you’re much cleverer than you think, too.”
Jay nodded.
“Yes. We will figure it out…together.”
“Welcome to what family feels like,” she said.
It was a bold statement, and perhaps it went a little too far. Jay simply nodded and glanced away, and she closed the door then, heading into the apartment building.
Marianne wondered just where things were going with Jay Parish.
What would become of them, when all was said and done?
Chapter 19
Marianne
Marianne stared out into the empty space around her work desk, her mind casually exploring the entire experience she’d been having with Jay. Everything was happening so fast, and yet in a way, it felt as though she had known him for so much longer.
“Marianne?”
She glanced up to see a female accountant staring at her with a concerned gaze.
“Everything all right?” the woman asked.
Marianne cleared her throat and sat up a little straighter in her chair.
“Yes. Sorry. Just a lot going on,” she said.
The woman nodded, as if she had any idea what was going on in Marianne’s life.
“I get that,” she said. “I just wanted to let you know that there’s only a few reams of paper left. Would you mind placing an order?”
“Of course,” Marianne said. “I’ll do that now.”
“Thanks,” the woman said, and as fast as she’d appeared, she was gone.
Marianne sighed as she clicked to the correct website and began to order several boxes of printing paper. She didn’t mind the menial work. It was something that kept her family afloat, and the work itself was easy enough.
What would it be like when she wouldn’t need to do this anymore? When she would be Jay’s wife…
Wife.
That word. It meant so much, and yet in these circumstances, so little. The last time she’d tried to bring up the subject of their sham marriage, he’d changed the topic completely, leaving Marianne wondering where they would end up, and how they would get there.
It wasn’t a feeling that sat well with her.
Marianne clicked the button to send the paper order as her cell phone buzzed, signaling a text.
Her heart leapt when she saw Jay’s name on the screen.
Any chance you might be free tonight?
She stared at the message as butterflies erupted in her belly. Jay was asking her out again! It had been a few days since their last encounter, and it wasn’t exactly a romantic one at that. Marianne considered the text for a moment, then wrote back a reply.
Let me see what I can do.
She switched over to texting her mother and asked if she might be able to keep Zoe for the night. Instantly, the phone rang.
“Hi, Mom,” Marianne said in a low voice.
“Why do you want the night free?” her mother asked.
“Because there are a few women from work that want to go out, and I thought it would be good for me,” Marianne lied.
She felt awful lying to her mother, but she could tell from the suspicious tone in Elaine’s voice that the woman already had an inkling about Marianne’s true whereabouts.
She hoped that this aspect of the situation would improve over time. She didn’t want to hide Jay from her mother forever. It would be nice to have all the elements of her life come together in some form of harmony.
“Is that so?” Elaine asked.
“Yes,” Marianne said. “It’s okay if you can’t. I just wanted to check. It’s been a rough couple of days.”
There was silence on the other end of the line for a moment.
“You sure you’re not just sneaking out with Jay Parish?” her mother asked.
She could come clean. She could tell her the truth.
“I’m sure,” she said, her tone even.
“All right, then,” Elaine said. “I’ll grab Zoe and we’ll swing by to get her an overnight bag. I hope you don’t stay out too late. It is a work night.”
Marianne rolled her eyes. Even as an adult, her mother still found ways to treat her like a child, sometimes.
“I won’t. Thank you, Mama.”
“You’re welcome. Have fun tonight, Marianne.”
“I will,” she said, and she hoped it was true.
She ended the call and then switched back to Jay’s text.
I’m free. What did you have in mind?
She watched as three dots appeared, her breath held in anticipation of his response.
Pick you up at the end of the work day for dinner and drinks?
Marianne typed back a quick response, accepting the offer, and then she sat back and stared at the clock.
It was going to be a long afternoon.
Marianne picked up a box of paperwork and began to work on some data entry she’d been putting off. As she got into a rhythm, she did her best not to glance at the clock in the bottom corner of her computer screen, instead opting to play some music in her headphones as she buried her head in her work.
A sudden movement caught the corner of her eye, and when she glanced up, she saw Jay grinning down at her. She pulled the headphones from her ears and smiled up at him sheepishly.
“You certainly do know how to focus. I see why we hired you,” Jay said, amused.
“Just trying to be a good member of the team,” Marianne said, and it was the truth.
She never wanted to let anyone down, even when that meant juggling a hundred things at once.
Marianne had learned over the years that she could handle just about anything life threw her way. The lessons hadn’t been easy, but she was stronger for them.
“Are you ready?” he asked.
“Just a second,” she said.
She finished entering the last document before turning off her computer.
A pair of accountants walked by and cast Marianne and Jay a curious glance, but said nothing as they made their way out via the elevator. Marianne glanced at Jay.
“Well, if you wanted to get tongues wagging, I think you’ve managed it,” she said.
Jay looked over his shoulder at the man and woman standing by the elevator. They were clearly looking at him, but when he met their gazes, they abruptly turned back to face the elevator, stepping inside as the doors opened to allow access.
“I suppose we have. Does that make you uncomfortable?” he asked.
Marianne considered that a moment, then shook her head.
“Truth is, once our arrangement is over, there really won’t be a need to work here any longer, will there?” she said.
Jay’s gaze turned thoughtful as he considered that.
“Well, of course, we would hate to lose you,” he said.
Marianne crossed her arms and grinned at him.
“Do you have any idea what it is I do?” she asked.
Jay waved in the direction of her desk.
“You’re a great secretary who keeps folks organized and helps them out. I’m not totally clueless about what goes on in my company, Marianne. Jeff keeps me informed.”
Marianne wondered just what Jeff might have told Jay about her, but she shook off the thought. Whatever he might have said, it obviously hadn’t stuck. When she’d walked into his office on that fateful day, he hadn’t known her from Adam.
“Yes, well, we’ll just se
e where the future leads us, shall we?” she said.
“Absolutely. On that note, let’s get out of here. I have something fun planned for us tonight.”
“Oh?” she asked.
When he didn’t elaborate, Marianne joined him as they made their own way out of the building and outside. The air was warm, with a cool breeze that caressed Marianne’s face as she tilted it up to the lowering sun.
“Would you like to cut through the park? It’s nice weather for a walk,” Jay said.
Marianne nodded.
“I’d love to,” she said.
They crossed the busy street and set off along one of the many gravel pathways. The scent of warm barbecue and freshly baked corn bread permeated the air as the sounds of children playing baseball and soccer and any number of other games surrounded them. Jay reached over and laced his fingers with hers.
“I’m sorry about my behavior the other day,” Jay said.
Marianne glanced up at him, curious.
“I don’t think you were out of line at all,” she said.
He shook his head.
“I was. I couldn’t see past my own nose while you were trying to show me that I could do so much better than I’ve been doing. I wanted to thank you for taking me to the food pantry. It really opened my eyes to the bigger picture.”
Marianne remained silent as they continued walking. It was satisfying to know that her message had gotten through to him.
“I wanted to tell you that I’ve reached out to the food pantry manager, and I’ve donated a large sum to ensure that they remain stocked with healthy, fresh food for anyone in need during this time.”
“You did what?” she gasped.
She stopped, then, and Jay turned to face her, his hand still wrapped around hers.
“I did something,” he said. “It felt good to take action in some way. It’s not perfect, and I know there has to be more that I can do while my hands are still tied, but it’s a step.”
He gazed into her eyes, searching her expression.
“Does that help?” he asked.
He looked so vulnerable, his expression so open and candid. She took his other hand in hers and then reached up to brush her lips against his.