by Weber, Carl
I did as he asked, lying down with my back to him. He draped his arm over me and pulled me back against his body as tightly as he could. This felt like heaven. After a couple of minutes, I could hear his breathing become slow and steady. He’d dozed off to sleep… with me in his arms.
It felt so good to be lying there, cuddled up beside a man, feeling desired, that I wanted to shout to the world how good I felt, but I would start by telling Daryl. I turned my body around to face him, and he stirred, slowly coming out of his post-sex sleep. I put my leg on top of his and began rubbing my foot up and down his leg to wake him. That’s when I felt something weird beneath his pajama bottoms.
I sat up and asked, “What the hell is that?”
“What?”
“This.” I nudged his ankle with my foot.
“Oh, that?” He was fully awake now, but he sure looked like he wished he wasn’t.
“Yeah, that,” I said flatly.
“Well, I guess I didn’t tell you… I’m on house arrest.”
Krystal
22
“Have a good day, baby,” I said to Slim as he released my waist. “And hurry home.”
We’d just had our good-bye kiss, the one he insisted on having every morning on the stoop in front of all the cackling hens, like we were a commercial for eHarmony or something. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to kiss Slim. He was a good enough kisser, but I couldn’t have cared less about what the peanut gallery on the stoop thought. My concern was that one of these days Daryl was going to walk out and see us kissing.
Yes, I still had the hots for my ex, despite being engaged to a man I loved, a man who would lay the world at my feet. Believe me, it wasn’t like I wanted to feel this way about Daryl, but he had this hold on me, mentally and physically, that he probably didn’t even know he had.
“I will,” Slim replied flirtatiously. “I gotta get back home to finish what you started this morning. I don’t know what’s gotten into you lately, but I like it.”
There were a few snickers from the peanut gallery, but I didn’t care. Sure, I’d woken his ass up at six o’clock this morning, and I fucked his brains out for the next two hours too. I’m not ashamed of it. I was horny as hell. I got that way whenever I dreamed about Daryl making love to me, and well, that seemed to be happening every night lately. Add in the fact that he was living in such close proximity, and I felt like I was losing my mind.
“You, baby. You’ve gotten into me deep and hard,” I told him with an equally naughty grin on my face. I couldn’t see their faces, but I was sure the stoop crowd was losing their minds. Slim and I loved teasing these horny old bats. “You know this is all yours whenever you want it.”
“That’s right, ’cause you know Slim always has what you need.”
“That’s right, Daddy. You always have what I need.” I ran my hand across his package for all to see. It didn’t take long for a bulge to appear through the thin material of his summer trousers. Now that, bitches, is what I’m working with.
He kissed me again and said, “I left something for you on your pillow.”
“A little blue box I hope?” I wanted to get to my apartment so bad I almost jumped out of my skin. I loved those little blue boxes he gave me. I don’t mean to sound shallow, but I could wake up to one of those blue boxes every day. Forget the man, just give me the present.
“If it is a little blue box, I got something for you when you get home. Something even better than what you got this morning.”
“Look, you better stop talking like that or I might not make it off the block,” Slim warned. It was kind of cute the way he kept glancing in the direction of the neighborhood gossips to see if they were listening. It felt good to know my man was proud that I was his.
“Go ahead and handle your business, baby. I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be right here waiting for you when you get back,” I said.
“Butt naked in pumps?”
I could feel the women’s eyes wander toward me, so I decided to give them the show they were looking for. “Butt naked in pumps, baby, with a can of whipped cream in one hand and K-Y Jelly in the other.”
“Aw, shit now,” Slim said. “Lemme get outta here so I can hurry up and get back. I’ll be home around three.”
“I’ll be waiting.” I shooed him away playfully, but not before he planted another kiss on my lips.
“I love you,” Slim said as he walked away.
“Love you too.” I stood there for a moment, marveling at how far Slim and I had come in our relationship. I couldn’t believe he had actually taken the leap to get us our own place. And if that wasn’t enough to show how serious he was about spending the rest of his life with me, I had this huge rock of an engagement ring to prove it. So what the hell was wrong with me that I still couldn’t stop thinking about Daryl?
My mind wandered to the blue box that Slim said he had left on my pillow. Maybe that would help me forget Daryl. And even if it didn’t, I knew it would make me feel good.
I headed back into the apartment building, eager to get the box. For some reason, the fates had decided they were going to fuck with me, because just as I walked into the lobby, Daryl came out of the stairwell. As always, he looked good, wearing slacks and a polo shirt. I caught a glimpse of the Jewish star pendant I’d bought him, and instantly I wished we could turn back to those happier days.
He froze for a moment when he saw me. As we stood there staring at each other, I could feel butterflies in my stomach and moisture between my legs. There was something about being in close proximity to that man that turned on my waterworks. I half smiled, wishing that I could drag him into my apartment and fuck him until I was raw inside.
Unfortunately, it didn’t take him long to snap out of his fog and remember the reality of our situation. A frown darkened his face as he headed in my direction. At first I thought he was going to curse me out or maybe even raise his hand to me, but instead, he brushed right past me as if I weren’t even there.
“Daryl, wait,” I said as I grabbed his arm.
He turned around, jerking away from me. “What?”
I exhaled, allowing myself a few seconds to try to put my words together. “I think we need to talk.”
He sucked his teeth and glared at me. “You wanna talk? How about the fact that you had a fiancé the entire time you were making me think that we were going to be together? We don’t have nothing to talk about, Krystal. Actions speak louder than words, and I got your message loud and clear.”
“I know, I know,” I replied, lowering my head. “I’m sorry. Once again I fucked up, but we still need to talk. Set some ground rules.”
“Ground rules for what?” He relaxed a little, uncrossing his arms and letting them fall by his sides.
“Me and you.”
He laughed. “There is no me and you. You’re engaged to be married. You live with your fiancé. The two of you need to go and live happily ever after and leave me the fuck alone.” He tried to walk off again, but I grabbed his hand this time, caressing it.
“What if happily ever after includes you?” I knew I was taking a shot in the dark, but I also knew that most men thought with their dicks. Daryl may have been smarter than most men, but he was still a man, and I had yet to meet one who could resist what I had to offer—no matter how mad I’d made him. “We can make this work if we want to,” I explained. “And nobody’s got to get hurt.”
“Is that right?” he sneered as he pulled his hand out of mine. “What exactly are you suggesting? A threesome?”
That might be fun, I thought but ultimately said, “No, silly. You two have way too much testosterone for that.” I was hoping my joke would break the tension a little, but no such luck. He was still glaring at me hatefully. I pressed ahead anyway, determined to break down his wall. “What I’m suggesting is an arrangement between you and me. We may not be able to be together twenty-four-seven, but you have to admit, nobody has chemistry like me and you.”
I could see in h
is eyes that he was contemplating my idea. There was a glimmer of hope, so I continued, “Slim spends a lot of time away from home, and well… think about it. Do you think it’s a coincidence that we ended up living together in the same apartment building? Don’t you see? It’s fate.”
He put up his hand to interrupt me. I was kind of glad, because I had been working so hard to convince him I felt like I was about to start rambling. And no matter how much I wanted him, I did not want to beg. That is not a good look.
“So, that’s it?” he said. “You want me for sex? And on top of that, you want me to play second fiddle to him and lurk in the corner like some punk? Ain’t no way in hell that’s gonna happen.”
Oh, my, this was not turning out the way I had intended. I definitely hadn’t meant to offend him. Appealing to his manhood wasn’t working. Maybe Daryl was different, I decided. Maybe he needed romance.
“Baby,” I said, trying a new approach. “You can’t deny that we have something special. You can’t deny how we make each other feel whenever we’re together.”
I reached for his hand, but he took a step back to increase the distance between us. “I think you forgot who the hell you’re dealing with,” he said. “I’m no jump-off. I don’t share women. He can have you. I’ve moved on.”
I tried again to reach for him, but he threw my hand off his arm as if he were throwing away trash. I refused to accept the thought that he was really through with me. I mean, why else would he have been blowing up my phone like he did? Daryl was just playing hard to get as far as I was concerned. I guess he thought I needed to be punished, but I was still confident that he would eventually give in.
Maybe I wasn’t using the right words to get my point across. Like he said, actions speak louder than words anyway, so I placed my hands on his cheeks and looked into his eyes, prepared to take action. I pressed my body against his and began molesting his mouth with my tongue.
“Stop it, Krystal,” he said, although it wasn’t easy with my tongue working its way down his throat.
“You know you want me, Daryl,” I breathed out heavily, then mashed my lips against his.
“Damn it, Krystal! Stop!” He gave me a little shove. “I don’t want you. I’ve found somebody ten times better.”
“I’m not letting you go!” I didn’t give a damn what he claimed. I knew we were meant to be together. I did a little jump up in the air, wrapping my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist.
“What the fuck is going on in here? Get your hands off my woman!”
Shit! I thought my heart would bust out of my chest when I heard Slim’s voice. I immediately released Daryl, letting my feet hit the floor.
I turned around, prepared to apologize. After all, he’d caught us in the act. But then I noticed the look on his face and realized there was still hope for me. See, he wasn’t looking at me at all. His eyes were burning with rage, but it was all directed at Daryl. Slim was staring him down, breathing hard, and clenching his fists like he was about to go postal on Daryl’s ass.
In a nanosecond, I knew what I had to do to save myself and my relationship. I reared back and slapped Daryl as hard as I could.
“Get away from me!” I screamed as I scrambled across the lobby into Slim’s arms. “Did you see that, baby? Did you see that? He tried to attack me! He was gonna rape me.”
“What! What the hell are you talking about?” Daryl massaged the spot where I had slapped him. “Why did you hit me?”
Looking back on it now, I know I should have been ashamed of myself, but at the time, I was acting on survival instincts. I was between a rock and a hard place, a position that only a snake could slither out of. Call me a snake if you want to, but I had to do what I had to do.
The look of betrayal on Daryl’s face bothered me, but not enough for a confession. I’d make it up to him later.
“You should kick his ass, baby. Get him!” I cried into Slim’s chest.
“Are you out your fucking mind?” Daryl spat.
“No, but you must be out of yours if you think I’m gonna let you get away with that foul-ass shit right there,” Slim shot back. I felt him grab my arms, moving me aside so that he could go after Daryl.
“Baby, baby, wait!” I said, planting my feet and keeping my position in front of Slim. “It’s not even worth it. The only thing that’s gonna happen if you go after him is you ending up in jail.” I nodded my head in the direction of the stoop ladies, who were all standing behind us, looking like they were ready to enjoy a show. They would watch the fight and love it, but those heifers wouldn’t hesitate to talk to the cops after it was all over. Slim got my meaning and backed down a little, but he didn’t like it one bit.
“I ain’t gonna let some punk-ass nigga do my girl like that and—”
“Punk-ass nigga,” Daryl repeated, taking a step toward us.
“That’s ri—”
I cut off Slim’s words with an eruption of loud crying. “Please, Slim, I can’t lose you. I’m okay. I just wanna go inside,” I wailed, putting on an Oscar-worthy performance.
“It’s okay, baby. I’m here,” Slim comforted me. He turned to Daryl and pointed a finger at him. “You one lucky muthafucka. Believe that. Next time you ain’t gonna be so lucky.” Slim wrapped his arms around me to escort me to the stairway.
I looked back at Daryl over my shoulder. He was standing there in utter confusion.
“Krystal, are you for real? You really gonna get down like this?” Daryl’s eyes questioned me as well. “You ain’t got nothing to say?”
He should have left it alone, because now I had to throw one last bomb so Slim wouldn’t get suspicious. “Yes, I do have something to say,” I replied. “I got a man, so keep your fucking hands off me!”
Benny
23
“Hey, son. Look, Pam is stopping over tonight, so if you don’t mind, I’ma, you know, need you to make yourself scarce,” Pop said as he entered the kitchen, where I had made myself a sandwich and popped open a beer.
I had just finished working on my blog, and I was about to go into the living room to settle in for the night and watch a movie. Needless to say, my pops telling me to get lost did not sit well with me. “What if I do mind? This is my house too,” I said, probably in a more harsh tone than I’d meant to. But why did he have to throw a monkey wrench into my plans just because he had plans? Why couldn’t they go somewhere else to handle their business? Why the hell couldn’t they go to her apartment? Uh, maybe because she’s a thirty-five-year-old whore who lives with her momma. Of course, I would have never said that out loud to my father, but that’s how I felt.
“I understand,” he said, “but you are the one who said that you feel a little bit uncomfortable when my lady friends come over, so I figured you wouldn’t want to stick around.”
Standing there with my plate in one hand and my drink in the other, I knew that in the end, it didn’t really matter how I felt about it. Pam was coming and I was leaving. I slammed my plate and glass down on the counter. Brushing by my father, I mumbled, “If you could keep it in your pants once in a while, then maybe we wouldn’t have to go through this.”
“Excuse me, young man? I don’t know exactly what it is that’s got you feeling all big and bad, but you better watch it. At the end of the day, I’m still your father and this place is in my name.”
“Yeah, well, maybe I should see about getting a place of my own.”
On that note, I exited the kitchen quickly in case he felt like proving that he was still the man of the house. I knew better than to come at him like that, but I was twenty-one years old now, a grown man. I wasn’t that same nerdy kid he loved bragging about, and sooner or later he needed to recognize that.
I went into my room, grabbed my knapsack, and then headed for the front door, figuring I’d go to the library or catch the train to Starbucks. In the living room, I called out, “I’m out. Call me when you get finished screwing!”
As I walked down the hall, I tho
ught about knocking on Daryl’s door. Other than our fishing trip, we hadn’t hung out since my birthday, and to be honest, the fishing trip was a little awkward because I kept thinking about those books. To top that off, Pop ended up inviting himself to come along. He never came out and said it, but it seemed like he didn’t like Daryl very much lately, so the conversation between them was always forced. At first I thought it was because Pop was jealous of how much time I spent with Daryl, and I’m sure that had something to do with it, but now that I’d seen those books at Daryl’s place, I wondered if maybe he had picked up on something about Daryl that I hadn’t.
I still didn’t know what to make of those books. Was dude gay or bisexual? And if he was, had he turned that way after being locked up in jail, or was he born that way? What the hell made someone like that? As confused as I was, though, I still considered him a friend—perhaps even my best friend. He was the first real buddy, other than my father, that I’d ever had. I didn’t want to lose that friendship. As long as he kept his hands to himself, he was still cool with me.
As pissed as I was at Pop, I decided I didn’t feel like dealing with my confused feelings about my friendship with Daryl either, so I headed out of the building. I’d only gotten halfway down the block when I heard the worst sound a black man could hear in New York City.
Whoop-whoop! That’s the sound of the police.
I turned to see a squad car rolling up beside me. “Hey, son, whaddya got there?” the officer on the passenger’s side asked. He was staring at my backpack.
“Books,” I said and kept walking, praying they would leave it at that and go bother someone else. I did not need this right now. My dad had already made it clear that he was running things and I was still a kid. Now the Man was trying to fuck with me. Did I have punk ass written on my forehead or something?
“Books, huh?” the officer mocked as the squad car rolled slowly beside me. “Well, why don’t you stop walking for a minute and let me talk to you about those books?”