by Lisa Childs
“I’m sorry,” she said. “It was stupid of me to run toward them when they were taking my car. And it was stupid of me to run into the house after we heard the shot.”
His hand moved, his thumb sliding over her lower lip. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I was too harsh with you.”
“You were right, though,” she acknowledged. “And I’ll be more careful now. You won’t have to worry about the baby.”
“I’m worried about you,” he said. “I almost shot you today.” He shuddered, and the bed shook beneath his body.
She slid toward him until they touched. Her arm against his, her hip, her thigh.
Her breath caught as her pulse quickened. She hadn’t been this close to him since that night. But that night, they had been even closer. No clothes had separated them. Nothing had as he’d filled her.
“That’s why I don’t think I can protect you,” he said. “I’m so worried about you that I can’t focus.” He blinked as if he were struggling now. His lashes were so long and thick, so black like his hair. He kept that short, but it was soft. She remembered how soft it had felt that night beneath her fingers, against her breast and her thigh.
She shivered.
And as if he thought she was cold, he pulled her closer, wrapping his arm around her. Her body pressed tightly against his now. But they weren’t close enough.
Not as close as she knew they could be.
“You’re not just trying to get rid of me?” she asked. “Like you used to?”
He chuckled. “If I wanted to get rid of you, I would have pulled that trigger.” But there was no amusement in his blue eyes—only something that looked like despair. “I came too close to doing that, to hurting you.”
He had hurt her.
And as if he knew it, his arm tightened. “I’m sorry, Annalise.”
“It was my fault,” she said. “You were right. I keep putting myself and the baby in danger.” Like now...
She should have been protecting herself—protecting her heart as it swelled in her chest, filling again with love for Nick. Love that he didn’t want, just like he didn’t want her.
“I think it’s my fault you’re in danger,” he said. “Someone’s after me, and they’re using you to hurt me.”
She must have been more tired than she’d realized. “How?”
“Hurting you would hurt me.”
“Why?” she asked. “I don’t mean anything to you.”
His blue eyes widened in surprise. “You really believe that?”
She nodded. “I’m just a pest—”
Before she could say any more, his mouth covered hers. He kissed her gently at first, his lips just brushing across her lips. But then she gasped for the breath that had escaped her lungs. And he deepened the kiss.
* * *
What the hell was wrong with him?
Logan had no idea why he had refused Nick’s resignation. Sure, he wanted the FBI special agent working for him. Nicholas Rus was one of the most brilliant men Logan had ever met; he was also strong, fearless and intense. And more intuitive than any other person Logan had met besides his mother. If Nick didn’t think he could protect Annalise Huxton, Logan should have taken him at his word and removed him from the assignment.
“The condo is safe,” Milek assured him.
Logan hadn’t realized he’d been staring at it through the windshield of the SUV. From the passenger seat next to him, Milek studied it, too. Made of brick and metal and concrete, the place really was a fortress.
“Nobody can get in there unless Nick or Annalise lets him inside,” Milek said, but it was as if he was trying to assure himself now.
The security system wasn’t infallible. Logan’s wife had breached it once. Sure, she’d set off the alarm, but she had made it inside. Stacy was a Kozminski, though.
“Well, nobody but Garek or I,” Milek amended himself before adding, “And Stacy...”
Logan chuckled.
“And none of us poses a threat to Nick.” The Kozminskis had once mistrusted lawmen and with good reason. A cop had framed their father for the murder of Logan’s father. But they all trusted Nick. Because he was Nick.
None of them had met a more honest man. And Nick had said that he couldn’t protect her.
Logan suspected his brother wasn’t talking about physically. Even with a shoulder wound, Nick could take care of himself. It was in other ways that Nick thought he couldn’t protect Annalise Huxton. The baby she carried had to be his.
He’d wanted to ask, but he worried that Nick would think he was prying. And he would shut them all out when he’d finally let them into his life.
Logan shook his head and focused on the real issue.
“Who does pose a threat to Nick?” he wondered aloud. “Garek talked to Chekov. He doesn’t think it’s him.”
“And Amber talked to Evelyn Reynolds,” Milek said, his voice taking on the usual pride he had in his wife.
Nick had recently jailed the former district attorney for corruption. Evelyn Reynolds had every reason to want revenge against him.
“And?”
Milek shrugged. “Amber doesn’t think Evelyn has the ability or resources anymore to go after anyone.” He uttered a ragged sigh. “If she did, I think she’d go after Amber instead of Nick.” Because Amber now had the job her former colleague had coveted.
Logan nodded. “So who is it?”
Milek shrugged again. “Nick made a lot of enemies in River City.”
A lot of dangerous enemies.
“And who knows what he did in the FBI before he came here,” Milek continued.
It must have been big to be given the assignment of cleaning up an entire police force. Finding who was after him could take a while.
Maybe even forever.
“I’ll talk to his former colleagues,” Milek offered.
“I already have a call in to Chief Lynch,” Logan said. The Bureau boss would help—if he could.
Could anyone help Nick?
Maybe Nick was right. Maybe he couldn’t protect Annalise. He was going to have his hands full protecting himself.
Chapter 10
Her lips were so soft, so silky beneath his. And her mouth...
He slipped his tongue into the heat and tasted the sweetness. Her tongue met his, shyly at first. And then she kissed him back. Her lips moved beneath his, and her teeth nipped, lightly grazing his tongue and his bottom lip.
Given her sweetness, her passion was a surprise. It had caught him off guard that night six months ago. It had severed his always tenuous hold on his control around her. And he’d forgotten who she was and who he was.
He’d acted only on the desire. That desire coursed through him now, heating his blood, making his heart pound furiously.
Making his body tense as need overwhelmed him. He slid his hands down her body, down the length of her back to the curve of her butt and hips. He wanted to bury himself inside her body—like he had that night. He had never felt anything as incredible as being inside Annalise.
Her hands were moving, too, from his hair down the nape of his neck to his shoulders. He flinched as she grazed over his wounded one.
She must have felt that flinch. “I’m sorry,” she murmured. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
He knew that. Annalise would never deliberately hurt anyone. Or at least, he hadn’t thought so. But she hadn’t told him about the pregnancy. And that hurt.
It also worried him.
Could he trust her?
Or was she more like his mother than he ever would have guessed? He pulled back.
“Are you okay?” she asked anxiously. Her fingers touched the bandage on his shoulder. “Do you need to go to the hospital?”
He shook his head.<
br />
“The stitches might have gotten torn open when you fought with that man in your house,” she said.
It hadn’t been much of a fight. He hoped he had, at least, hit the son of a bitch with a bullet. He had his officers at the River City PD checking hospitals and clinics. When his cell vibrated, he hoped it was one of them. He pulled it from his pocket and glanced at the screen.
He didn’t recognize the number, but he answered it anyway. It gave him an excuse to roll away from Annalise, to put some much needed distance between them. He sat up on the edge of the bed, his back to her.
“Special Agent Rus here,” he murmured into the phone.
“Agent?” his sister remarked. He hadn’t realized she’d had his number. But there wasn’t anything Nikki Payne couldn’t find out on her own. She was an expert computer hacker, probably because Logan had always kept her chained to a desk. “I didn’t think you’d really quit.”
He hadn’t. Not yet. “I haven’t had time to give my notice yet,” he pointed out.
She actually chuckled. “And you don’t want to give up the resources yet, either.”
“No,” he admitted. She was smart. Logan had probably lost his most valuable employee when she’d switched over to Cooper’s team.
“Send your resources over to the alley behind Chekov’s nightclub.”
He cursed. “What will they find?” He hoped not another damn body. Even though the place had been shut down months ago, bad things continued to happen there. It continued to be a beacon for crime.
“Annalise’s car,” Nikki replied.
“How’d you find it?” Had she thought to look there, or had she been tipped off?
“Traffic cams.”
“You hacked into them?”
She snorted. “What? You going to arrest me for hacking into River City PD?”
“I would have given you access if you’d asked,” he said. “Thanks for finding the car.”
“It’s empty,” she said with a weary-sounding sigh. “They must have taken her overnight bag. It’s probably been wiped clean, too.”
“I’ll send over the crime lab to check,” he said. “Just in case.” Ideally the men had missed something, like the seat lever or rearview mirror.
“Maybe the techs will find something,” she said doubtfully.
She’d probably already checked those places for prints. She was resourceful. She was also stubborn.
“Does Logan know you’re working the case?” he asked.
“I don’t work for Logan anymore,” she reminded him.
“He’s still your brother,” Nick said. “And he’s not going to be happy if you put yourself in danger.” Neither would Nick, especially if she was doing it for him. But why would she do that? She resented the hell out of him.
“I shouldn’t have let them get away,” she murmured.
He knew that feeling of guilt and responsibility. He deserved to feel like that, though. She didn’t. “Nikki—”
“Call your crime lab,” she said. And she clicked off before he could offer her any reassurances.
It wasn’t as if she would listen to what he said, anyway—not when she never listened to Logan. And she actually loved that brother.
“She found my car?” Annalise asked.
He nodded but cautioned her, “It’s probably a total loss. It got shot up in the hospital parking garage.”
Her fingertips skimmed over his shoulder again. “So did you.”
“Maybe I’m a total loss, too,” he murmured.
“You weren’t supposed to leave the hospital yet, not with all the blood you lost. And you could have been reinjured when that man attacked you in your house,” she said. “You should go to the hospital to have them check your stitches.”
“I can’t leave you.”
“The other bodyguards are here.”
He shook his head. “They left.” But knowing how Payne Protection worked, he doubted they had gone very far. He wasn’t accustomed to or entirely comfortable with having all this support. Growing up an only child, he’d thought he would always be a loner. Sure, Gage had followed him around. And Annalise.
But he’d always known they weren’t family, only neighbors who had pitied him. They’d had a loving, supportive family—unlike him.
But that was then. Everything had changed when his mother died and left him the letter telling him who his father was. Everything but him.
He was still a loner. He still didn’t know how to let people in. Not even Annalise.
Except for that one night. That night she had gotten closer than anyone else ever had to him. She’d touched something Nick hadn’t even realized he had: a heart.
* * *
He was a total loss. Annalise knew it. Like her car, she needed to write off Nick and finally let go of her hope that they would ever be together.
Again.
They’d had that one night. And in a few months, they would have a child. Did Nick want to be a part of their baby’s life? He had never wanted to be a part of hers.
Moments after his sister’s phone call, he had slipped out of the bed and walked into the other room. She’d heard the rumble of his deep voice as he made calls. Probably to the crime lab. Maybe to his brothers.
He was keeping them apprised. She was the one who felt in the dark. Not just about why someone was after her but also about Nick.
Despite knowing him almost her entire life, she doubted she would ever understand him. So she focused on her life again. She had calls of her own to make—apologizing to the client whose closing she’d missed. Checking in with her subcontractors for the property management business.
She had so many responsibilities. Movement fluttered inside her belly, reminding her of the greatest responsibility of them all. Her baby.
Nick’s baby.
She had to delegate. Her career wasn’t as important as her child. She handed out some assignments to her employees. Then she turned off her phone. She wouldn’t worry about what was happening in Chicago. But without work to focus on, her mind went back to Nick. Her lips tingled yet from his kisses. She’d thought he’d wanted her again. And maybe he had, until she’d touched his wounded shoulder.
She glanced at her phone again. If she had Logan’s number or Nikki’s or Milek’s, she would have called them—would have convinced them to get medical help for Nick. But she didn’t know how to reach them.
She didn’t know how to reach Nick, either. Doubting he would return to the bedroom, she opened the door and ran into his chest.
His hands gripped her shoulders, steadying her. “Are you okay?”
She nodded. “I’m fine. I just didn’t expect you to be standing outside the door. Is that what a bodyguard does?”
He shrugged. “I wouldn’t know. I haven’t been a bodyguard very long.”
She remembered what she’d overheard of his conversation with Logan and his sister. “You’re really going to quit the Bureau?”
He nodded.
Shock gripped her. He loved his job. His enthusiasm for it had been the reason Gage had decided to become an FBI agent, too. “Why would you do that?”
“To keep you safe.”
“I won’t be in danger forever,” she said. At least, she hoped she wouldn’t be. “What will you do when I’m safe again?”
“I’ll keep working for Logan,” he said.
She doubted that. “I know why you’re doing this,” she said. “You feel responsible, that you put me in danger.”
“I’m sure I did.”
She didn’t believe that. But she couldn’t imagine what she would have done to put herself in danger, either. Despite his doubts the night before, she had no crazy exes. No one obsessed with her or wanting vengeance.
“It’s not y
our fault,” she said.
“It is if they’re after me and they’re using you to get to me.”
“Why would they use me?” she asked. “Why would they think you cared about what might happen to me?”
He reached out, and his fingers skimmed over her belly. “They must have followed me that night I went to Chicago.”
She shivered as she realized what they had observed—him going inside a house with her and not leaving until morning, after they’d made love for hours and hours.
“Why?” she asked, wondering why he hadn’t pushed her away that night like he had every other time she’d hugged him.
He shrugged. “I wish I knew.”
She suspected he didn’t know what she’d really asked when he continued, “I’ve put away a lot of people. Someone must be after revenge.”
And they were using her to get it. Or so he believed. She wasn’t convinced.
But she wanted her real question—the one that had bothered her for the past six months—answered. “Why did you make love to me that night?”
He sucked in an audible breath. “Annalise...”
“You’ve pushed me away for years,” she reminded him. “You didn’t want me following you, touching you.”
“You were a kid,” he said.
“I haven’t been a kid for seven years...” An adult was considered eighteen. That was how old he and Gage had been when they’d joined the Marines. “You have acted more annoyed with me as we’ve gotten older, more insistent that you don’t want me hugging you.”
He caught her hand in his and brought it down to the front of his pants. “This is why,” he said as he rubbed her knuckles down the erection pushing against his fly. “Because every time you touch me, I react like this.”
Hope swelled in her heart. His hand dropped away from hers, but she kept rubbing her fingers along his fly. Until he groaned.
“You’re killing me.”
She wasn’t trying to—someone else was doing that. She didn’t want to hurt him. She wanted the same thing she’d always wanted from Nick—his love.
That was probably the lost cause. But even if she couldn’t have his love, maybe she could have his desire.