“I do not think that the chapel is the appropriate place for drowning our cares and woes in wine,” he answered, climbing to his feet to meet his friend.
“Ah, but did not our own good Lord drink of it at his Last Supper?” Luc asked as he held out a mug to Christian. As he took it from him, Luc pulled the cap off the wineskin with his teeth and poured a healthy measure into each cup. Replacing the cap on the skin, he motioned Christian to sit again. “I am certain that He will have no ill feelings toward two of his faithful imbibing a bit in his house.”
Christian sat down where he had been and drank the wine in one long swallow, never tasting the quality or lack thereof as it filled his stomach. Wiping his mouth on the back of his sleeve, he leaned his head back against the cold stone of the chapel wall. Luc swallowed a mouthful or two of his own wine and walked a few steps away, retrieving something from the floor.
“Yours, my lord?”
Luc turned the dagger handle end out and handed it back to him. Securing it in his belt, Christian held up his cup for more wine. Luc sat next to him on the floor, put his own cup down and refilled the mug for him.
“Remember, my lord, we have but one skin of wine and no guarantee that I can find more for us.”
Taking a deep swallow of the wine, Christian gazed at his friend. Had word of his outrageous behavior already spread throughout the keep? As if his thoughts had been read, his friend met his stare and spoke.
“Fear not. No cry has gone out about the mad Earl of Harbridge brandishing a knife over his wife and then fleeing into the night.” At his raised eyebrow, Luc went on with his explanation. “One of our own servants, in the stables for his own purposes, saw your…encounter and informed me.”
“My wife?”
“Is safely ensconced in her chamber. I sought you there and found her instead. She bade me find you and determine if all is well.” Luc paused, taking a drink of wine before continuing. “So, is all well?”
Christian put his mug on the floor and stood, pacing the confines of the chapel. He knew Luc was there as a friend, but he did not want his friend to know the extent of his circumstances.
“The countess…Emalie…” he stuttered.
“Aye, Emalie is the countess.” Luc laughed sarcastically at him.
“Do you goad me?” He walked over to Luc and kicked dirt from the floor at him.
Luc dusted off his leg and laughed again. “Soft words and wooing you with wine was not working, so I thought other actions were needed to spur you.”
Rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands, he looked at the man before him and wondered how much he could tell him. Too many knowing the full sordid story would increase the chances of it becoming known too far and wide. It could endanger the entire matter in which he served the king and put his own honor at risk.
“Emalie is part of a bargain I made with the king.”
“Chris, most wives are part of some bargain made between two parties. It is the way of things for men of your rank and mine.”
“There is more to this than a simple agreement to merge lands and wealth, Luc. More that you do not know.” Christian paused once more, uneasy about saying the words to anyone.
Luc looked away from him and drank from his cup again. On looking back, his friend spoke in a soft voice, made no less effective by its quiet tones.
“Your ladywife carries a child not of your making.”
Christian sucked in a breath. How could Luc have known this truth?
“That also is not so unusual, Chris. Men have been known to marry women already breeding, to give them name and protection.”
“Widows known to be breeding, aye. Women carrying their seed, aye. But she is neither and the child within her has not my blood! And without my knowledge.”
Luc gave a grim smile. “Ah, now I understand. You have been caught in the games of king and prince and mother, even as your father was.”
“How did you know of my wife’s condition? Was it common knowledge to all but me?” Christian felt a wave of shame pass through him. Was he the only one fooled into believing her a virgin? Did all of her people know of his role or had she cuckolded him even as he protected her reputation with his blood on her sheets? How many laughed behind their hands or in their hearts at the display of those sheets the morning after their wedding?
“I have never lived among people so closemouthed about their lady before. If any here knows the truth of her dishonor, they speak not of it freely or even among those of us who came with you.”
“How then did you discover it?” Christian’s head was reeling from the wine, and the events of the night.
“A few unguarded murmurings when the pregnancy was announced to you by the midwife. Again, one of our own heard and passed it on to me.”
“And you never thought to tell me that you knew the truth?” Closing his eyes, Christian hung his head. Breathing slowly, he waited for his friend to answer.
“I did not want to force you to acknowledge or deny this. I thought you would be better if you thought everyone believed that it is yours.”
“But everyone apparently does not believe. How did you know these murmurings were the truth?”
Christian looked up and watched as Luc finished his wine and stood. Following his friend’s path with his gaze, Christian waited.
“I saw your condition the day you arrived at Chateau d’Azure. You could not raise your arm let alone your cock. I suspect it has only recently regained its strength as you have regained yours?”
“And you hoped to spare me from shame? What do you think your words do to me now?”
“Chris, I do not disparage your manhood. For God’s sake, I have gone wenching with you too many times not to know your prowess in bedplay. I have seen too many women leave your chambers sighing in satisfaction to question your abilities to tup them well. But I saw you, I saw what Richard’s deprivations did to your body. No man could expect to perform in the marital bed until some measure of healing and health had been gained.”
He nodded at Luc. His friend’s assessment was completely accurate. He had not known how near to death he and his brother had been until they left their prison and traveled home. He wondered now how he had survived the trip from Poitiers to England. He was only now beginning to feel more secure in his health and his strength.
“And now, Chris? What do you do now? Can you turn back on this bargain with Richard?”
“Not and keep the honor it has brought back to me. ’Twas the reason I agreed to this arrangement sight unseen.” Christian stood and dusted off his legs.
“And you have regained your honor through this?”
“Aye, my honor, my name and titles, my land and wealth. All has been returned to me since I agreed to carry out this task for the king.”
Something in the words rang false to him, but he did not want to think about that now. He was once again the Count of Langier as well as the Earl of Harbridge, honor and wealth restored to him.
“And tonight? The encounter with your wife?”
“I thought she sought out her lover, the one who dishonored her. I could not control my rage at the thought of it.”
“What would our old weapons master say of that, I wonder? I would think that the training you received for the battleground would serve you well in this, too.”
“‘Losing control means losing your life’ is what he taught us. I will regain my control over this, Luc. No one will be in danger from my anger.” At his look of disbelief, he added, “Not even my wife.”
“I will leave now and let you return to your ladywife. I am certain she will feel much relief in knowing that she will not find you brandishing a weapon over her head again.”
His friend picked up the wineskin and empty mugs and turned to leave.
“Luc. My thanks for your candor tonight. And for the wine.”
“Make peace with this, Chris. You have all that you wanted and then some, from this bargain with the king. Accept the good and bad or it
will destroy all that you gained.”
Luc made a quick bow in the direction of the altar table in front of the chapel and left. Christian knew his friend was correct—he needed to come to some acceptance of this. His life could not continue in these alternating bouts of anger and control. He had to let go of this rage and accept that he had made the bargain and would have to live with the ramifications of his decision.
Looking around the empty chapel, he knew what he had to do. Taking a deep breath, he took the first step toward what he hoped would be a more acceptable marriage and life. He had given his word to the king and he would stand by it.
His honor demanded no less than that from him.
Chapter Fourteen
The sounds of the approaching dawn pierced the silence around him and he looked out the small window in the chamber to see how much longer it would be before the sun rose. He had been back for over an hour but had chosen to wait for Emalie to wake on her own. One glance at her face showed the evidence of his rash behavior—swollen eyes and nose and tracks of tears on her cheeks. But the acrid odor of the used pot in the corner shamed him more effectively than he thought possible.
Christian sat on a stool away from the hearth and simply watched his wife sleep. Other than a quiet hiccup or occasional sigh, she made no other sounds or movements. He wondered if this was how she always slept or if this was out of the ordinary for her. If his explanation worked, mayhap he would discover that and more. For now he bided his time and waited as patiently as he could for dawn’s light and noises to awaken Emalie.
Soon the sounds of a stirring keep surrounded him from outside the window and inside the keep. It would be a short time until Alyce rose and came to serve her lady. Standing quietly and making his way to the outer room, he shook her and told her that Emalie still slept and she was not to be disturbed. Confident that that should give him some measure of time and privacy, he returned within and sat back down.
He noticed the signs of her waking in the slight movements of her arms and the tilting of her head. Since she faced the hearth, she would not see him unless she turned over. Emalie let out a quiet yawn as she turned onto her side and rubbed at her eyes. His gaze followed every movement she made as she stretched leisurely and then slid her hands down over her stomach. She had not opened her eyes yet, but her lips moved, the words not said aloud. He wondered what she’d said.
His eyes were drawn to the slow movement of her hands again. She circled her belly over and over, repeating some words under her breath. His curiosity gained control over his attempts to remain out of her sight. Even softly, his voice seemed to split the silence of the room.
“What is it that you say? A morning prayer?”
Emalie gasped and sat up in bed, staring at him. So many emotions crossed her face that he scarce knew what to say first. Seeing the fear grow in her widened eyes and pale face, he only knew he must say something.
“My pardon for frightening you,” he began, as he watched her swallow several times. Her gaze now moved over him, from head to feet and back again, as though she thought him some specter from her dreams. “Both now and last night.”
He stood and took a step toward the bed. She edged ever so slightly away from him. Each step he took closer moved her nearer to falling out of the bed. He stopped.
“Have a care, Emalie.”
Her hand slipped over the side and as she grabbed for a handhold, she lost her balance. Without hesitating, he reached across and took hold of her, preventing her from falling. Once secure in her position, he released her and sat on the bed.
“I have asked your maid to leave you undisturbed for now so that we might…speak on matters between us.”
The silence surrounded them and he waited for her response. Other than the calling of some birds outside the window, nothing broke into the moment. Her eyes cleared as she shook her head, sending loose tendrils of her hair.
“I am listening, my lord.”
Her tone revealed nothing to him of her thoughts or feelings. He would need to move on from here.
“These few months since our marriage have been difficult ones. Although I know we’ve both been raised to expect a contracted marriage, I now realize that our expectations of this marriage were completely different.”
A slight nod was all she gifted him with. He continued.
“I observed my father when he married Geoff’s mother and took over control of her estates. I thought his ideas and methods were sound and successful and sought to follow them here. As I mentioned to you one evening several weeks ago, I did not intend to come here and trample on your feelings.” He hoped to see a blush or some sign that she remembered what else had happened that night between them. She gave no such indication.
“You and Geoff have different mothers? But you look so much alike.”
“Aye, my father married Geoff’s mother after my mother’s death. Apparently the Dumont blood runs deeply in both of us.”
She nodded more this time at his words, but her face was still blank.
“In my father’s case, he was wresting control from his wife’s family. I fear I followed his example too closely and did not give you a chance to cooperate with my efforts.”
He stood once more and made his way to her side of the bed. Looking down at her, he reached up to touch her cheek. He could see the struggle as she held herself still and allowed his touch.
“I think I resented your extraordinary successes here and on your other estates. ’Tis a feat quite unknown for women. And when one and all proclaimed your abilities and talents, even old Father Elwood, I confess to feeling jealous of you.”
“But, my lord, I…”
“Nay, please let me finish before I lose my way.” He pulled a stool over to the bedside and sat next to her. “I was beginning to see the foolishness in my ways when I learned of your condition. After abiding by your request and then almost…well, I confess that I felt myself losing all to the rage inside. I struck out at you in anger and sought to control you more when I could not control myself. And in spite of my worst behavior, you answered each challenge laid at your feet with a dignity and grace I could not help but admire.”
He took her hand in his and raised it to his lips.
“Emalie, I beg your forgiveness for last night. I can not promise that the anger is gone, but I will promise that I am no threat to you any longer.”
He saw tears well in her eyes and she swallowed several times before finally speaking.
“’Tis I who needs beg forgiveness, my lord. You were correct that I have deceived you from the first.”
“I fear that we were both dragged into this by Eleanor, for her own reasons. Who can understand the Plantagenets? Emalie, I would like to propose that we begin again. It is the only way for us to honor the pledges we made together. I believe I would welcome your advice.” Christian stood and helped her to stand. Reaching down, he unhooked the ring of keys from his belt and handed it back to her. “I would ask that you consult with me before changing anything that I have ordered changed since my arrival.”
“Oh, aye, my lord.” Her tear-filled eyes now glistened with excitement. “I will be certain to do that.”
“I will leave you to rest now for I am certain that neither of us slept well last night.”
“My lord, thank you for doing this,” she said, holding out the key ring. “I know that it was difficult for you coming here and being surprised every step of the way.”
He nodded at her and began to pull the door open. He would ask once more and then mayhap the knowledge would put his demons to rest.
“Would you give me his name?”
The joy left her face and her mouth trembled. “I can not, my lord.”
“If I knew, then I would not see you in my mind in bed with every man I see here in Greystone.”
She walked to him and placed her hand on his arm. “If I speak his name, you will forever link him to me and never see anything else.”
This was not what h
e hoped for and she must have sensed it, for she continued. “I will assure you that I have never spoken of him to anyone else and never will. Can that not suffice between us?”
Mayhap that would be enough. “No one else knows who fathered your child?”
Sadness filled her face as she spoke. “A very few know, my lord, and they would keep that secret until their deaths.”
Although certain that he could name those few, he did not. ’Twas better left unsaid. His pride and his honor could be preserved in this.
“I will accept your pledge then, lady.”
He turned and pulled the door open, leaving by the hallway. As he walked toward his own chamber, he heard sounds that did not sound like resting. He smiled, mayhap this would work out for the best after all.
The next weeks and months were like a dream to her—the one she’d always had, but now it was coming true for her. With the return of her responsibilities, Emalie had once more become a vital part of running Greystone and her other properties. As summer ended and the harvest was completed and stored, life settled down into a comfortable routine.
Christian was still arrogant, sometimes even a prig. Nothing could change that. But he asked for her opinions and he followed her advice. The day he asked her to sit court with him was the day she realized that she was falling in love with her husband. She cried for a long time after he sent word inviting her to sit beside him to hear the grievances and requests of their people. Luckily she had several hours to regain her composure before she was expected to appear, but even that was a close thing.
Geoffrey recovered and thrived and soon was involved in exactly what she had said young men of his age should be—he was obsessed with the young women of the keep. Although Emalie tried to look away from his activities, she knew from gossip that at least one of the laundry maids and one of the kitchen maids were meeting him in the stables on a regular basis. His most endearing quality though was his unswerving loyalty to his brother.
No matter what task he was assigned, Geoff did whatever Christian asked of him. And Emalie knew that the most difficult one was yet to come, for Christian had mentioned to her that he planned to send Geoffrey back to their estate in Poitiers in the spring. She was not sure who would miss him more when he was gone.
The Dumont Bride Page 14