It felt uncommonly good to be praised. ‘Channing doesn’t appreciate the book.’
Catherine smiled and turned another page. ‘Channing thinks all flowers smell like roses.’
They both laughed then. It wasn’t meanly said and it occurred to Finn it had been ages since he’d had an inside joke with someone. That the person he should have one with was Catherine spoke deeply to him in a frightening but fundamental way.
‘Tell me about this.’ She held the book out to him, pointing to a peculiar flower.
‘That’s curare. It’s a deadly plant, actually. One wouldn’t guess it. It looks more like a weed than anything else. All the tribes have their variation of curare poison. We found out the hard way.’
Catherine tucked her feet up under skirts. ‘Well? Aren’t you going to tell me about it?’
Finn waved away the suggestion with a hand. ‘You don’t want to hear about it.’
‘Yes, I do.’ Catherine passed him the book. ‘Tell me.’
‘All right,’ Finn acceded, but secretly it was no hardship to tell her. It felt good to have an audience. His family listened to be polite. ‘Jack and I had been out for three weeks and we were deep in the rainforest, and five miles out from our current base camp.’
‘Jack?’
‘Viscount Wainsbridge,’ he explained. ‘We were set upon by natives who believed we were trespassing. Set upon isn’t quite the right word, we were ambushed. We never heard them coming. The natives move with enormous stealth and silence. One moment Jack was standing beside me and the next he was down. A tiny dart had hit him in the arm and the curare, the poison, worked that fast. The natives use it on their darts.’
‘What happened?’ Catherine was enrapt.
‘I took out my pistol and fired into the bushes. The noise scattered them. They weren’t prepared for gunfire. It gave me time to get Wainsbridge up. We took refuge in the bushes. There was no way I could outrun an unseen enemy with a wounded man on my shoulders. I hid us as best I could, primed my pistol and waited until dark. Then I made a run for it, dragging Wainsbridge with me every step of the way. He reacted badly to it—apparently he’d been hit with it once before. We had an antidote at camp, however, and he recovered, but it was a near thing. I didn’t know it at the time, but if we’d waited much longer he would have been beyond the antidote.’
‘You walked through the rainforest for five miles carrying a full-grown man?’
‘Dragged him part of the way—I didn’t say it was a pretty remove.’ Finn chuckled.
‘But you saved him at your own expense.’ Her eyes shone with admiration. ‘You’re an uncommonly good man, Finn.’
‘I didn’t do it to be a hero, Catherine. I did it because it was right.’ Finn shut the book, a little uncomfortable with the shine in her eyes. Is this what he wanted? Catherine Emerson to fall in love with him? Or he with her? Maybe it was too late to think he had any choice in the matter. In any case, it was too late to be caught in the library with her.
‘Shall I see you to your room?’ They rose together and Finn picked up a lamp to light their way. But when they reached the library door, Finn stopped. He couldn’t leave this room without knowing where he stood with her. If there was no going back, there was only going forwards. Finn set down the lamp. ‘Catherine, wait.’
She turned, finding herself between him and the wall of the door. There was nowhere for her to go. He bracketed her with his hands braced on either side of the door. Her breath caught. He could see the pulse-spot at the base of her neck leap ever so delicately, her sea-green eyes widen in desirous anticipation. She was not opposed to this.
He kissed her, hard and insistent, his mouth slanting over hers with determination. This kiss was different than the one at the river. That kiss had been about surprise and exploration. But this was about claiming, about wanting. And it wasn’t enough. They were both breathless when they pulled away.
Catherine’s eyes held a challenge as they searched his face, his eyes for some explanation. ‘Don’t tell me that was another mistake. Once I might believe but not twice.’
‘That was no mistake.’ And just to be sure, he kissed her again.
Chapter Six
December 23rd, the day of the Yule Ball
‘You are so lucky!’ Jenny Brightly trilled as a group of them tramped through the snow to the village for shopping the next morning. Catherine smiled patiently. Jenny was eighteen and pretty and a bit man crazy but one could hardly fault her for all her exuberance. ‘If Mr Deverill had kissed me under the mistletoe I would have swooned. I just know it!’ The other girls with them agreed.
‘Do you think he means to court you?’ Another girl, Amanda Hardwick, put in.
‘Hardly.’ Catherine dismissed the idea with a wave of her mittened hand. ‘We are old friends and it was just a game.’ The air was crisp and the grey sky overhead promised a cold day.
‘I don’t have any old friends who kiss like that!’ Amanda gave a dramatic sigh. ‘Are you sure he doesn’t mean to court you?’
Catherine laughed away the notion, but she wasn’t sure there wasn’t some truth to it. After yesterday, she wasn’t certain of anything, except she was glad Alyson and Meredith had opted to come down in the sleigh rather than walk. Such conjecture about their brother and their best friend would be upsetting? Awkward? Both? She wasn’t sure what their reaction would be.
The village came into view, looking picturesque, as they started down the slope. Snow clung to the church spire and was piled in thick layers on the roofs of the shops. Catherine changed the topic of conversation to shopping.
* * *
In the village, Meredith and Alyson were waiting to drag her away from the group. ‘Mr Waters has a new shipment of ribbons in just for Christmas!’ Alyson exclaimed excitedly, pulling her into the ‘emporium’, the village’s pride and joy.
The emporium was warm and crowded with shoppers. It was hard not to be sucked into the Christmas spirit. ‘I don’t need any ribbons,’ Catherine protested with a laugh after Alyson’s fifth attempt to get her to purchase a length of dark-green ribbon.
‘Yes, you do. You need to meet people. Young men in particular,’ Alyson replied, selecting another length, this one in a blue. ‘It’s been three days and you haven’t met anyone but Lord Richard.’ Alyson made a pouting moue. ‘You’ll never meet anyone if you spend all your time with Finn, always talking about his plants.’
‘Well, you never know,’ Catherine answered, reaching for a length of emerald green to distract Alyson and hoping her face didn’t give her away. It was bad enough Alyson had noticed she had been spending time with Finn.
‘Oh, that emerald green will look lovely on Christmas day.’ Alyson frowned. ‘But it doesn’t match your gown for the ball. You have to get something to match for tonight too.’ She went back to the length of blue, talking the whole while. Meredith, Catherine noticed, had gone silent and was studying her intently. Did Meredith guess?
* * *
Catherine didn’t have to wonder long. She and Meredith were alone outside, waiting for Alyson to finish her business at the milliner’s, when Meredith brought up the subject. ‘Where have you and Finn been sneaking off to? Alyson might not have noticed, but I have. Marcus has. He commented on it last night.’
Well, Marcus and his powers of intuition could go hang. It certainly put her in a difficult position. She’d confess all to Meredith if there was something to confess. But at this point, she hadn’t any idea what to say. Finn and I have fallen in love? No, she couldn’t say that. It wasn’t true. Was it? Did people fall in love in a matter of days? ‘We went to the barn. I wanted to see Druid and Hamish.’
Meredith raised a censorious eye brow. ‘That explains the first disappearance. Were Hamish and Druid at the lake too?’
Catherine felt a moment’s panic.
How much had they seen? How many people had noticed them leaving? ‘Finn wanted to show me an early fawn.’
‘And?’ Meredith prompted.
‘That’s all,’ Catherine bluffed—she hoped it was convincing.
‘You looked a bit unnerved a moment ago. Seeing a fawn doesn’t match the reaction.’
Perhaps it wasn’t Marcus’s powers of intuition she needed to fear. Catherine bit her lip. ‘It’s complicated. I can’t really explain it.’ Not even to herself.
Meredith’s eyes flashed in triumph, dark eyes like Finn’s. ‘“It” means there’s something then. I thought so,’ she said with an air of mystery.
Catherine reached out a hand and gripped Meredith’s wrist. ‘Please don’t say anything.’
Meredith smiled softly and covered Catherine’s hand. ‘Of course I won’t, but you’d better stop keeping secrets. My best friend and my brother. Who would have thought?’
Catherine shook her head, her words rushing out as she spied Alyson coming out of the store. ‘It might not be anything, Merry. It was only a couple of kisses. They just sort of happened. They don’t have to mean anything.’ Then she blushed, her cheeks hot in spite of the cold. Had she really said that?
Catherine expected Meredith to tease her. Instead Meredith leaned close and whispered, ‘Don’t disappoint me. You know Finn better than that. Do you really think he does things that have no meaning?’
She did know Finn better than that, Catherine realised. Perhaps that was what had been bothering her about their kisses. He could say they were a spontaneous venture, but she didn’t believe it because it simply wasn’t his nature. They did mean something, but what exactly? Was that the reason he hadn’t come on the expedition at the last minute? She’d thought it was settled last night.
* * *
The thought stayed with her the rest of the day as she picked out little gifts for the family. She had other things packed in her trunk that she’d brought from Paris, but she’d wanted something small to set at their plates for dinner. There were ribbons for Alyson and Meredith, an orange for their father who had a passion for the citrusy fruit and a small, carefully carved chocolate swan for their mother and hers. And that left only Finn. In earlier days, she’d have got him peppermints. But that was before he’d kissed her, before she’d kissed him back and her body had gone all hot and trembly in his arms until all she could think about was him, until all she could want was him.
Besides, what would he think if she gave him peppermints now? Would he think he had bad breath? She’d never known kissing to be this complicated before. Kissing redefined everything. At least Finn’s kisses did. It was probably noteworthy to point out that Channing’s kiss had not altered the speed with which she’d decided on his gift: the usual pistachios.
* * *
It was another hour before she decided on something. By then, the sky was overcast and glowering. Sleighs had come down from the house to carry the merry shoppers home with their packages, but they were gone by the time Catherine arrived at the meeting spot. Only one sleigh remained, a small two-seater with Finn at the ribbons. ‘Where is everyone?’ Catherine looked around, a little nervous. How many people would have noticed this special attention? He’d not come on the excursion, but had driven down specifically for her.
‘They’ve gone on ahead. I told them I’d wait for you. Everyone is in a hurry to dress for the ball.’
He helped her in, his hand strong and firm at her elbow.
‘You said you’d come today,’ she said once her packages were stowed safely at her feet and Finn had arranged the lap robe to his satisfaction.
‘I had work to do.’ Finn climbed in beside her, his leg resting against hers in the small space. ‘A ball takes a lot of manpower to put together.’
‘You work a lot. First, the skating party, now this.’ He had his other work too, always writing articles or working on his research. Who knew what other responsibilities he had regarding the estate? He’d been the responsible one growing up too. It was no surprise he’d turned out this way—so serious, so hard working. ‘Don’t you ever have fun?’
‘My work is gratifying. It’s a special source of fun.’ Finn reached for the reins, but Catherine was faster. She snatched them and shouted to the team, slapping the reins on their backs for good measure, ‘Get on!’
‘What are you doing?’ Finn raised his voice to be heard over the wind.
‘Going for a sleigh ride!’ Catherine called back, tossing him a triumphant look as they sped over the snow. New flakes began to fall, lighting the greying landscape in the magical dusk. It was a thrill of a ride. They sailed over rolling hills, the speed heady and exhilarating. Catherine shot a glance at Finn beside her, his face a study of surprise and then a smile and then a great, loud laugh as they took a snowy corner. The brisk wind hit her face and she gave a shout of pure delight.
She pulled the horses to a halt near the shelter of the woods, her breath coming out in panting puffs from the excitement. ‘I haven’t driven like that since...since last winter!’
‘Last winter?’ Finn sat back in the seat. ‘I suppose I should be thankful this was a regular skill of yours. Where did you learn to drive like that?’
She let the reins go slack and leaned back with him. She laughed. ‘We have snow in Paris too, you know. My friends and I would have sleighing parties in the Bois de Boulogne outside the city. My great-aunt has a friend who has a château and we’d visit quite a lot if there was snow.’ Catherine gave her hair a toss, swinging it over one shoulder. Finn shifted in his seat.
‘Do you miss your friends in Paris?’
‘I do, but I like being home and being with my parents. My friends and I will write and Paris isn’t so very far these days. I will see them again.’
‘Do you mean to go back?’ His dark eyes were serious once more.
‘Only to visit.’ She smiled and rapped him on the arm. ‘Are you eager to get rid of me so soon? It’s been three days and already you’re packing me off.’
‘No, I’m merely trying to discern your plans.’
Why? she wanted to ask. Catherine felt as if any false step here would prevent Finn from saying what was on his mind. They were dancing around something here. She kept her answer vague.
‘I hadn’t thought of any beyond getting home and celebrating Christmas.’ And marrying Channing and being part of the Deverill clan for ever. That particular plan sounded a bit childish now in retrospect. ‘I’ll help my father with his research, of course. He always needs help organising his material.’ Catherine shrugged. ‘The usual, I suppose. There will be church meetings and ladies’ circles. Perhaps we might go down to London for part of the Season. What about your plans? Do you have any more expeditions planned to the Caribbean?’ She could see him already at the head of an expedition, sailing down uncharted waters, so strong, so alive.
‘I don’t know. Maybe. Viscount Wainsbridge would like to have me map a new river for him, but I’m not sure I can get away. There is a lot to do here and Father is relying on me more and more.’ There was a battle waging there. She could see hints of it in his eyes, no matter how blasé he tried to sound. The earldom had long been a conflicted issue for him. It was the conditions that disturbed him the most, the idea that his father would have to pass for him to achieve the ends to which he’d been raised. He was in no hurry to inherit and yet such waiting must be stifling for a man like him. He wanted to do something with his life, not sit around waiting, not when there were new worlds to explore.
‘Channing could help while you’re gone.’
That earned her a stern look. ‘Channing will be in London. He spends most of the year there now with his, ah, new business venture. Besides, I wouldn’t want to miss the girls’ weddings. They’re both bound to be married by this time next year.’
‘It’s all right to do something
for yourself, to want something just for you, Finn,’ Catherine offered tentatively.
* * *
Even if it’s you? She had no idea how utterly beautiful she looked—the picture of health, bright and vibrant against the white of the snow. His body recognised such beauty instantly, although he wished it wouldn’t. Finn shifted once more in his seat. ‘It’s complicated.’ Like our kisses. ‘The balance between duty and desire is not necessarily something that can be explained.’ Again, much like his reaction to her.
Finn picked up the ribbons. If he didn’t do something soon, he’d end up kissing her again. There was no question of doing more than kiss, not out here in the snow even if he wanted it to be otherwise. It was far too cold to start taking off clothes. He called to the horses, setting them in motion, but another idea had been set in motion. His brain wouldn’t let go of a naughty train of thought—tonight, at the ball, perhaps? It wouldn’t be too cold then and there’d be all sorts of places to sneak off to, all sorts of people not paying attention. It would be one time when it would be good not to have people notice him. While Channing was dazzling everyone, he could be whisking Catherine away to a secluded library.
To do what? Seduce her? He might be serious, but he wasn’t a monk. He knew very well from first-hand experience what went on in dimly lit libraries at balls when no one was watching. But seduction was just one step away from marriage. Finn knew very well that seducing Catherine could not happen without the benefit of marriage to follow. She was the daughter of an old family friend, his sisters’ best friend and his own friend as well.
‘Watch out for the tree!’ Catherine called at the last moment, covering his hands with hers and pulling on the reins. The sleigh swerved around a thin birch tree sticking out of the ground just in time.
Catherine laughed. ‘What are you thinking about that has taken all your attention?’ She playfully yanked on the reins. ‘Let me drive home and you go right ahead with your thoughts.’
A Sprinkling of Christmas Magic Page 16